Wanna Tell You How I Feel Inside

I was currently standing in front of the sink, washing off dishes. All three of us had already finished eating our meals. Mrs. Baker had left for work and I found out Mr. Baker had already left at least three hours ago. This tripped me out since it was only ten o’clock in the morning. Matt had went to find something to watch on TV and Zacky had gone to answer the phone. I could heard him talking to someone in the hall, but my mind was off in another world. I wonder how everyone’s doing at home? What are they doing without me around?

“Matt! Sage!” I looked into the doorway to see Zacky standing in the portion of the hallway that was between the kitchen and living room. “We’re going to Johnny’s.”

“Who’s Johnny?” I asked as I heard Matt flip off the TV.

“A friend of ours,” Zacky replied before running upstairs, something about forgetting something. I rolled my eyes at his obviousness, but said nothing out loud as I placed the cup I just finished drying back in it’s spot. Just as I closed the cabinet, a furious knocking came from the door. I walked to the front door and saw it locked.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Matt warned. Ignoring the buff man, I unlocked the door silently and began to pull it open. A force on the other side shoved it open and took me into a tight hug which brought us both to the floor.

“Zacky! My love!” The voice that belonged to the person that landed on me cried. I tried to shove the person off, but they wouldn’t budge. “Zacky? You feel like you have boobs. I told you to lay off the sweets.”

“That’s not Zacky, Jimmy!” The guy, ‘Jimmy’, sat up to look down at me. Straddling my hips, he looked at me with his eyes squinted. I glared at him, a light blush on my cheeks. This guy was okay for looks, but it’s very awkward being straddled by a guy that randomly bursted through your door and hugged you thinking you were your brother. I wordlessly sat there, hoping that the world would brighten for him soon.

“Are you sure? Looks like it could be him. Just took out his snakebites,” Jimmy said to another person. He had short black hair and a nostril piercing. Is this douche saying I looked like a guy?! Or is it he thinks Zacky looks like a girl? The other dude slapped his palm to his forehead as this Jimmy character still looked at me in wonder.

“Jimmy, what are you doing to Sage?!” We all looked up to see Zacky all but running down the stairs. Jimmy looked back and forth from me and Zacky for a minute before realization dawned on him.

“Brian! Why didn’t you tell me this was his sister?!” Jimmy yelled, quickly standing to his feet. I laid on my back as I blinked at the ceiling. Is this guy for real? Suddenly a hand was in my view which I gladly took. I was soon on my feet and saw Zacky slap Jimmy in the back of the head who in turn slapped Brian’s head. Brian just gave Jimmy a warning look which made him move to the other side of Zacky and away from Brian.

“Thanks,” I said to Matt when I saw him standing next to me. He just nodded in reply.

“Oh yeah! Jimmy, Brian this is Sage. Sage this is Jimmy and Brian. They also go by Rev and Synyster or Syn for short.” At this I had to raise my eyebrow.

“Syn and Rev?” I echoed, a clear look of confusion obvious. Brian and Jimmy looked at him in disbelief as Zacky raised his hands.

“We were getting onto that before we broke off into an argument last night.” Brian and Jimmy just rolled their eyes at Zacky’s answer to their silent question. I continued to look, lost as hell.

“Oh yeah. Well we’re in a band.” With that he walked out the front door, Matt and the others following wordlessly.

“That’s it?!” I yelled after them.

“That’s it.” I huffed before running out after them. They were all chatting and laughing, me following down the street silently. I watched as the breeze moved the green leaves of the trees. I breathed in deeply, savoring the smell of the ocean. Only two blocks down and one to the right and I’d be walking on sand. The thought to ditch them rang in my head, but I shook it out. I had to be nice. Ditching people didn’t seem nice. Suddenly I ran into someone’s back.

“Ouch! Watch where you’re going!”

“Hey, we were the ones that said ‘this is Johnny’s place’. You’re the one that chose not to listen and run into someone!” I looked up to find out it wasn’t someone’s back, it was actually their chest. I looked up even more to see Brian smirking down at me. However, he wasn’t the one that was talking. It was actually Zacky. I had to literally rip my eyes away from him to see Zacky giving me a raised eyebrow look.

“What?” He just turned on his heel and started up the walk. Jimmy and Matt followed automatically, but I was stuck in my spot. I looked back at Brian who was still just staring down at me. I nervously rubbed the back of my neck. This kid is really beginning to give me the creeps. “Sorry about running into you.”

“No problem. I never mind hot girls touching me.” At this I blushed bright red, not really sure what to reply to that with. Suddenly I heard someone clear their throat. We both turned to see Matt hovering in the doorway.

“Are you two coming or not?” I had to hold myself back from sprinting to my knight in shining armor. I casually walked to the front door and gave a thankful smile to Matt. He nodded and I was suddenly pulled by my hand down the hall.

“Come on Sage! We gotta get him while he’s still out!” Jimmy whispered to me excitedly.

“Doesn’t he know we’re here?” Jimmy grinned and shook his head ‘no’. At this I couldn’t help but high five him. I like the way he thinks. Soon I had a water pistol in my hand, same as Jimmy. Matt, Brian, and Zacky decided to sit in the living room and wait. I could hear the TV flip on and rolled my eyes. Is that all Matt does? Go to people’s houses and watch TV? We crept into the room Jimmy told me was Johnny’s. We stood on either side of the bed before grinning at each other then drenching the sleeping body in cold water.

“What the fuck?!” The short guy yelled. Well, I can’t really talk. This kid was about two inches taller than me. And only in boxers… I couldn’t stop laughing as he flipped out at the tall stick named Jimmy. He looked over at me and turned bright red, getting wrapped up in his sheets and falling face first on the floor. Jimmy and I gave each other a high five again before running out of the room. Matt, Zacky, and Brian looked up as we hunched over in the hall, trying regain our breath.

“Is he up?” We randomly started to laugh again at the thought of our wake up action. I nodded, the guys giving me strange looks. Suddenly the short kid came into the room wearing jeans, a white shirt, and some shoes and a glare fixed on us.

“You guys are assholes.” This just made Jimmy and I grin and salute him. “Who is Jimmy’s twin?”

“This is Sage, my foster sister,” Zacky replied, standing to his feet from the couch.

“Johnny Christ,” the guy said, extending a hand towards me. I reluctantly shook it before taking my hand back.

“Can we go to the beach?” Everyone looked over at me with a raised eyebrow. I huffed and crossed my arms over my chest. “What? You guys are acting like it’s crazy to go to the beach in California.”

“It’s nothing. Come on guys, let’s go!” Jimmy announced, running out the front door. We all shook our heads at him, but still followed none the less. I was again in the back, just following everyone. I zoned out and by the time I returned to beach was only a few feet away. I quickly pulled off my shoes followed by shoving my socks into them. With shoes in hand, I ran out into the sand. I let my toes move in the smooth, relaxing tan sand. My eyes closed and I breathed the ocean air in a bliss.

I sat in the sand, my toes wiggling in the sand. I giggled, the skin on my feet getting tickled. I heard someone yell my name. Turning in my spot I saw Toby, Amy, and Todd running from down the beach. Before I knew it my best friends had tackled me to the cool sand. I could feel it go down my shirt and through my hair.

“Stop! Get off!” I laughed out, waves crashing over us. When they finally got off me we were all completely soaked with water and sand. We all laughed at each other. We weren’t sure what we were laughing at, maybe just the fact that we were here, living.

“Can you believe we’re here? No parents, no annoying siblings. Just the three of us. No rules of any kind!” Toby exclaimed, crossing his arms under his head and falling backwards into the beach.

“Nothing to hold back our crazy ideas and fun times,” I agreed, placing Todd’s aviators back on my face. Todd took out a pack of cigarettes that had magically been avoided from the water. Passing one to each of us, we took turns lighting the white sticks of joy. I let out my first drag before laying down with my head on Toby’s chest. For a while all that filled the air was us exhaling, the waves crashing, and Toby’s heartbeats. I was in a bliss.

“Sage?” I opened my eyes and looked at Toby who still laid on the ground. His dark maroon hair that fell in layers fanned out around him. His hazel eyes stared at me. I couldn’t help but trace his tattoos with my fingers.

“Yeah?” I brought my eyes back to his that were filled with an emotion I couldn’t recognize.

“You know I love you, right?”

“Of course. I love you too,” I replied, pecking his lips. He sat up, obviously much taller than me just by us sitting. He wrapped his legs around my waist and held my face with his hands.

“Please don’t leave me. Ever. Please?” Toby practically begged. I felt a sudden ache for seeing him like this. I hated knowing I made him feel like this.

“I promise.”

That was spring break. We had escaped to a city in Washington since Toby was able to drive. A week later Ms. Hemmy called me into her office. After the news I could barely confront Toby. When I did, he bawled. I bawled. We hugged and kissed, never wanting to leave each other’s arms. Then Mr. Jefferson had to force me into the car. That’s when I turned my CD player as high as it would go. That is why I can’t stay here. I have to leave.

“Sage?” I was abruptly snapped back to reality. Matt was in front of me with a worried expression. I could see the rest of the guys behind him, playing and laughing in the ocean. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Perfectly fine,” I replied with a fake smile. Matt got a hold of my arm before I could leave. I looked up again to see breath taking hazel eyes that reminded me too much of Toby’s. I yanked my arm back before running towards the others. Suddenly I was tackled into the waves by a random body.

“That’s what you get for earlier!” Johnny yelled as he ran off.

“Oh, it’s on!”