Baby, I'm A Dreamer For Sure

The first raindrops fell on my face as I slowly begun to walk down the empty street. It was cold and dark and now wet as well. I was glad that I had worn leggings after all, and converse instead of heels. I took of my leather jacket and held it over my head so my hair wouldn’t get wet. It’s not that I’m conceited or anything. It’s just that since I have a lot of hairspray in it, it becomes a mess when it gets wet.

I started crying when I thought about what had happened. Not because he had hurt me, cause I didn’t even like him that much in the first place, at least now I knew the feelings were mutual. But he was such a douche and I felt so used humiliated.

I hated to admit I was wrong, but Alex and Sophie were right, and now I had to put my heart on my sleeve and apologize. It was not that I was afraid of their reaction, because I knew they would forgive me, at least I knew Sophie would, I didn’t know Alex so well and maybe he would hold a grudge. But I was so angry and disappointed in myself for not seeing it coming. I should have known something like this would happen eventually, especially after what happened on Wednesday.

A car pulled up to the curb and stooped right next to me, and the driver climbed out. I hurried on my step to get away from them before they noticed me.

“Jessica!” I heard a familiar voice behind. I turned around, shocked to see Alex running up to me with the engine of his car still running.

“Alex!?” I exclaimed shockingly. I had never expected him to show up here, but I was more than relieved to see someone I knew, even though we weren’t on the best terms.

“What are you doing here? Are you okay?” He asked while walking up to me, his hair already soaked from the rain.

“I’m so happy to see you, you have no idea!” I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him close.

“Oh,” He chuckled, surprised. He stumbled a little but hugged back none the less.

“I’m so sorry, Alex.” I said sincerely when I pulled back. I looked up into his dark brown eyes.

“Get in the car before you catch pneumonia.” He demanded and walked over to the car himself and got in, not even acknowledging what I’d just said. I sighed and hopped into the passenger seat, so he was still mad at me, but at least nice enough to care about my health and give me a ride home. That’s a start.

“What were you doing there all alone in the middle of the night?” He repeated his question as he started driving down the road.

“Dick left me there.” I said in a low voice, looking down at my hands in my lap.

“He what?!” Alex snapped his head in my direction shockingly.

I nodded, still not looking at him and dried a few tears that had come back at the thought of Dick again.

“What a dick, seriously, who does that?” He exclaimed angrily, turning his attention back on the road.

“Yeah, he was a real douche bag.” I mumbled. “You were right about him, Alex. And I should have listened to you, I’m sorry.” I spoke fast, just wanted to get it over with. I didn’t want things to be awkward between us and I didn’t want him to hate me.

“Don’t apologize Jessie, it’s not your fault the dude’s a dick.” He told me sincerely.

“I guess not, but I still wasn’t fair to you, you were just telling me the truth and I was too blind to see.”

“I heard love does that to you.”

“I am not in love with him.” I quickly defended myself. It hurt me to know that he thought that. I wanted him to know that I loved him and no one else.

“Okay, sure. That’s why you’re crying.” He said unconvinced as he stopped the car and it was only then I realised that we were already at my house.

We stayed silent for a while. He looked a little uncomfortable, like he didn’t know what to say or do. I wasn’t really in talking mood right now either. I didn’t make a move to get out of the car. I looked up at my house and saw the lights on in the living room. I could make out two figures standing there making wild gestures at one another. I wasn’t hard to figure out they were fighting.

I sighed, it was midnight now and they were still fighting, I didn’t know how they got the energy to do that. But I did know one thing, I did not under any circumstances want to go in there as long as they were fighting.

Alex followed my eyes to see what I was looking at, then looking back at me with sympathy in his eyes. “Are you okay?” He asked softly.

“I don’t want to go in there,” I whispered looking up at him.

“I won’t make you,” He gave me a small smile and started up the car again. He drove the two blocks down to his house and into the driveway.

We got out of the car and bolted up to the porch where we would be safe from the rain. “Thank you, Alex.” I said as he unlocked the house. I was so grateful to him. He was such a sweet guy and knew how to take care of a girl and make her feel worthy. This was only one of the many reasons I was in love with him.

“What for?” He asked surprised. He opened the door and let me walk in first. I hanged my soaked jacket on a hanger and took off my wet shoes.

Once he got his off, he took the lead down to the basement and into his room. I intentionally avoided his question and followed him downstairs.

“I’m so wet.” I announced without thinking.

“You want me to take care of that?” He smirked and winked at me. I stared at him dumb founded, before I caught on his joke and blushed immensely.

“Do you want some dry clothes?” He asked as he stood by his closet, and laughed at my reaction.

“Yes, please.” I smiled and walked up next to him. He gave me a t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants. I took them and walked into the bathroom to change. I was sober this time and knew better than to undress in front of him.

I took my time in the bathroom and washed my face, cleaning it from all make up. I walked back into his room, stepping on the pants all the time since they were too long for me. I felt déjà vu as I walked up to his bed where he already was seated leaning back against the headboard.

“It’s okay that I stay here right?” I asked insecurely, biting my lower lip. “Or do you want me to go up to the guest room?”

“No, it’s fine. I’m pretty sure mom would call the cops thinking it was a burglar if she heard someone up there.” He chuckled lightly.

“Oh, okay. I don’t want to risk running into Sophie anyway. I can’t take another fight today.” I sighed and got in the bed, sitting next him and fiddling around with my hands nervously.

“Yeah, do you want to tell me what happened earlier?” He asked turning his upper body to face me.

I sighed and swallowed looking down at my hands. “I eh…. He bought me a present.” I started looking up at him. “A pair of earrings. And well, in return he expected me to … eh put out. And I wouldn’t do it, I mean we were in his freaking car. So he got mad and yelled at me, calling me a prude and …a lot of other stuff.” I looked down at my hands again. I had almost told him what Dick had said about him, but I thought it was best not to mention that.

I felt the tears come again. Damn why wouldn’t they stop. I didn’t even care about him, but what he had done really hurt me.

“So he just left you there?” Alex asked, I could see he was trying to control his anger as he clenched his hands.

I nodded slowly still not looking at him. I felt really awkward telling him all this, but I still didn’t want to lie to him. “He said he wouldn’t drive me home if I didn’t ‘give him what he wanted’ so I just got out of the car and he drove off. Then you showed up not long after. What were you doing there, by the way?”

“Oh, Zack’s father lives in that neighborhood, I was just on my way home when I caught sight of you.” He sighed, then placed two fingers under my chin to lift my face up so I would look at him. He smiled sympathetically and wiped my tears away with his thumb. “Hey, don’t cry. He’s not worth your tears.” He whispered softly.

I stared into his beautiful brown eyes and my heart started beating faster. “I don’t care about him really. I just feel so humiliated.” I whispered.

“I understand.”

I felt so good to hear him say that, so good to know that he was there for me when I needed someone. And I sometimes doubted why I loved him?

Before I could comprehend what I was doing, before I could stop myself from humiliating me even further, I leaned up. I inhaled and closed my eyes right before I pressed my lips to his.