Baby, I'm A Dreamer For Sure

‘If you’re not doing anyhting tonight, there’s a free ticket to our concert for you. Just tell the security guard your name and he will give it to you.’

I read the text over and over, still not believing that was the first I’ve heard from him in two months. There was an address in the text as well, a place here in Chicago.

My thoughts were running wild with questions of why he would do this. Did he want me to go backstage and talk to him, or did he want me to go there to mock me and throw it in my face how well he had moved on.

To tell the truth I hadn’t moved on. I wasn’t as depressed about it as I had been, but I still thought about him every day. Wondering how he was doing, if he had met someone new, or if he was thinking about me too.

The will to get answers to those questions is what led me to go. I was nervous as I walked past the line outside the front entrance and up to the security guard that was standing by the back door.

“Can I help you, miss?” He asked looking at me suspiciously.

“Um, yeah. My name is Jessica Johnson, and I think Alex Gaskarth, the singer of All Time Low left me a ticket with you?” I said nervously.

“Oh, yes of course.” He smiled, letting down his guard. He took a laminate card out of his back pocket and hung it around my neck with the strings attached to it. It had All Time Low’s logo on it and it said Backstage with big bold letters.

He opened the door behind him and gestured for me to go inside. “You can go through here, so you don’t have to wait in line. If you follow the corridor and then take to the right you will find All Time Low’s dressing room down there.”

I smiled and stepped into the building. “Thank you.” I said. He nodded and closed the door behind me.

I was a little surprised Alex had gotten me a backstage pass. That would mean he wanted to see me. I had thought he did this out of spite, but why go through all that trouble just to bring me down. I mean really, we didn’t part on exactly friendly way, but it was somewhat a mutual break up. There weren’t really any hard feelings, I didn’t hate him for breaking up with me. I was a bit disappointed and sad but I didn’t hate him. And he didn’t have any reason to hate me, he was the one to initiate the break up. Because I had chosen my dad over him, right… that…

I can’t say that I regret my decision, I had gotten pretty close with my dad these past two months, and I can’t regret that. But I did regret how things ended with Alex and I, but thinking back, there wasn’t a lot that I could do. He had made up his mind about me and I just have to deal with that. So what was I doing here?

I stood nervously staring at the door that had a sign with All Time Low’s logo on. I could hear voices inside so I knew they were in there. I took a deep breath and opened the door. Silence consumed the room once I stepped inside and let the door fall close behind me, which made me wonder if they all knew I would be here or if Alex hadn’t told them.

Once I had done a quick over look of the room I could establish that Alex was not in the room, neither was Rian. But Jack and Zack were sitting with their instruments and talking to their manager Matt, they were all looking at me, making me feel uncomfortable. I should have never come here…

“Jessica!” Jack finally exclaimed with a big smile, hopping up from his seat and run up to me, pulling me into a bone crushing hug. I huffed as the air was knocked out of my lungs. But laughed feeling at ease at once. It was hard not to like Jack. “I feel like I haven’t seen you forever!”

“Well, I’m still alive.” I joked as we pulled apart from the hug. I waved a hello to Zack and Matt, not really knowing them to well to hug them. Well, I probably wouldn’t have hugged Jack either had he not jumped on me.

“We weren’t sure if you would come or not.” Jack said.

“I wasn’t sure either.” I smiled weakly.

“Alex will be happy that you did.”

“Where is he?” I wanted to see him, I really did. Just talk to him, see if he’s okay. I really hoped that we could be friends after the summer maybe.

Jack smiled and pointed towards a door on the other side of the room. That’s when I noticed the faint sound of someone singing coming from the direction. “He’s warming up with voice.” Jack explained.

I nodded and walked over to the door, my heart beating loudly in my chest. I looked back at Jack once and he just nodded towards the door, encouraging me. At least I knew he had my back.