Crash Into My Arms

The smell of pancakes wafting through the house from the kitchen awoke me from my slumber the following morning. Like a child, I sprang out of bed and dashed to the kitchen, where I found Terry slaving over the hot stove, and Rose and Ben, Max’s grandmother and younger brother sitting at the kitchen table.

“Miseria, darling, it’s been too long, please, sit down.” Rose smiled, pulling out the chair beside her.
“It’s good to see you too, Rose.” I responded, taking my seat.
“My goodness, you’ve grown, if my daughter hadn’t told me you stayed here last night I might not have recognized who you were.” She chuckled.
“She has grown, hasn’t she?” laughed Terry, dishing the last lot of pancakes onto a huge plate and bringing them over to the table.
“I remember you as a mere girl of fourteen, and now here you are, three years later, all grown up.” Rose smiled.
“Speaking of who’s grown up.” I spoke, looking over at Ben. “Ben, you’ve changed a fair bit, I remember you when you were eight, and you’re now…” I trailed off, honestly clueless as to how old Ben would be now.
“Eleven.” He answered.
“Jeez, has that much time really passed?” I said. “I can see you outgrew the skater kid look.” I noted, motioning towards his formerly brown, bowl-cut hair which was now blonde and spiky, and the blue, tight-fitting California t-shirt and white baggy shorts that replaced what was once a baggy Element t-shirt and dirt-covered jeans.
“Yeah, it got lame.” He shrugged. “Anyways, I’m done.” He said, finishing off the last of his breakfast. “I’ll see you around.” He nodded towards me, before leaving the room.
I watched him leave, a little taken aback by his sudden departure. “Have I said something?” I asked, looking at Terry. “He seemed in quite a hurry to leave.”
“Goodness, no.” she laughed. “That’s just Ben these days, he’s a man of few words.”
“Young man, to be exact.” Rose corrected Terry, jabbing at the air in her daughter’s direction with her fork.
“So how’s life?” Terry asked.
“Oh, there’s not much to tell.” What was I supposed to say? That my mother had become an alcoholic and her boyfriend had hit me? Hell no.
“You still in school?” Rose asked.
“Oh erm…” Another difficult question to answer, since I hardly went anymore, for obvious reasons. I decided to just lie through my teeth. “Y-Yeah, yeah I am.” I forced a brief smile.
“Is something bothering you?” Rose pried. “Your smile doesn’t seem as genuine as it was when you were a child.”

A lump welled up in my throat; Rose was referring to the old me, the younger me, before life took a swipe and took away everything that held my world together. Back when I had a tight-knit circle of great friends, when I was still obsessing over Jesse McCartney, when I still listened to Pop, and wore far too much pink. Before… Before Dad died…

“Life’s…” I began, trying to find the right words. “Life’s become difficult.” I admitted, it was probably the most I could say without going into detail, but Rose had always been one to pry my troubles out of me.
“Sweetheart, you can tell us, what’s bothering you?” She asked, placing a hand on mine in reassurance.
I shook my head. “I can’t talk about it.” I sighed. “I really can’t, it’s just… it’s too much to deal with.”
“But you shouldn’t have to deal with it alone.” Terry said. “Do you remember when you came by here the day after you found out Max and Nikola were together? Who comforted you through your tears and were there to listen?”
“You and Rose.” I said, my mind recalling that very day.
“And I still stand by what I said all those years ago, Miseria.” She added. “Max was an idiot for not choosing to be with you and instead going for your best friend, I would have loved to have been able to call you my daughter-in-law somewhere down the line.” She smiled. “I still think of you as my daughter, time hasn’t changed a thing.”
“I stand by my word too, darling.” Rose said. “I still think of you as my granddaughter, so if you ever need somebody to speak to, my daughter and I are here for you.”
“Thanks.” I forced a smile.
“You should go out to the lounge room.” Terry smiled. “There’s somebody there who I think would very much like to talk to you.”

I gave her a puzzled look as I arose from my seat and left the kitchen. I could hear School’s Out by Alice Cooper blasting from the TV, and entered the lounge room to find Max, and his friend I remembered from many years ago; Zach, sitting on the couch playing Guitar Hero. I waited until they had finished the song before speaking.

“Hey.”
Max turned to face me, a big smile spreading across his face. “Excuse me.” He said to Zach, rising from the couch. “I’ll be back in a bit, you can keep playing.”

Zach watched Max walk over to me, sniggering cold-heartedly, he had never really liked me all that much, had even asked me out as a sick joke many years ago.

“Ignore him.” Max said, leading me outside, where the two of us stood in the very same spot on the front porch that we had always sat in as kids. “So how are you?”
“Fine.” I answered, quite dishonestly.
“You don’t seem fine.” He noted.
“Oh, Captain Obvious to the mother-fucking rescue!” I exclaimed, my voice dripping with sarcasm. “I’m wearing your old shirt, slept in your old bed last night, and your mother and grandmother are reminiscing about the bloody old days!” I snapped.
“Ouch.” He said. “But c’mon.” He smiled, staring at me through those emerald-green eyes that used to make me swoon oh-so-much. “It wasn’t all bad, I miss those days.”
I dropped my gaze, I would not allow him to try and hypnotize me like he used to, everything we had ever shared was in the past now, he saw to that when he left me a mere three years ago. “Don’t look at me like that.” I said.
“Like what?” He asked.
“Like you used to; when you pretended to care about me.”
“Miseria, I did care about you.”
“Not the way I wanted you to.” I snarled, making myself painfully clear.
“No.” He nodded. “That is true, not the way you wanted me to, but I did care, Miseria, I loved you.” He looked at me, his expression slightly more serious. “As a friend.” He added, making himself very clear, once-a-fucking-gain.
“Thanks for re-opening the wound there, Max.” I smirked, miming stabbing myself in the heart.
“Don’t be like that.” He rolled his eyes. “I still care, Miseria.”
“Haha, yeah, okay.” I snorted. “You’ve spent the last few years tormenting me, you shoved me into the wall when that bullshit with me “stalking” Sky got spread around the school, you’ve repeatedly called me a slut, and you’ve pretended to be my friend again and then fucked me over numerous times since you moved from here to your grandmother’s house!” I snapped. “You call that, caring about me?!”
“You wanna know why I came and spoke to you in McDonald’s a few weeks ago?” He growled, his voice becoming angered now. “Because the night before that, I remembered the night you and I were playing Guitar Hero, talking about how we were going to run away to LA together, and I was going to become a professional skateboarder, while you’d try and land a record deal singing!” He snapped. “That plan to pursue our dreams together that went to shit once I went out with Nikola.”
“Yeah well, whose fault’s that?” I smirked, folding my arms and leaning against the brick wall.
“I know I screwed up, Missy.” Max said, leaning on the railing on the edge of the porch.
I rolled my eyes. “Don’t give me the old nickname, Max, I’ve told you this before.” I said, walking over and leaning on the railing beside him.
“That memory made me realize something, Missy.” He frowned, ignoring my request to stop using the nickname, looking down at his hands. “I missed you, I miss our friendship.” He sighed. “I was hoping to make amends.”
“Max.” I groaned. “I can’t just pretend like none of that shit ever happened.” I said. “I can’t just forget about everything you’ve done and become your best friend again.”
“I understand.”
“But.” I added. “What I can do, is agree to make peace, at least for now.” I turned to him, forcing a small smile.
“That’s better than nothing.” He smiled, his eyes crinkling up in the corners as he gave me “that look” again. “I’ll take what I can get.”

I held out my hand, and he took it, as the two of us made our agreement by handshake…