When You Read Between the Lines

A few days later, Joe woke up to an empty bed. He had been staying at Faith’s the past few nights to comfort her. She cried herself to sleep every night because she knew she would be losing her father soon. When he realized Faith wasn’t in the room he went downstairs, his heart pounding with worry. At the bottom of the stairs, his feet hitting the cool stone floor, he saw Faith sitting on the couch with her mother and sister in complete silence.

Quietly, he turned the corner and went to the room William was in. It was completely silent. No beeping machines, no sound of air being pumped into a tube down his throat, no music playing softly in the corner like it had been for the past five days. He was gone.

“Shit,” Joe muttered, taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, a lump forming in his throat. He turned to go out to the living room only to see Faith standing there, her cheeks stained with tears, her eyes red and swollen from crying. She stepped forward and stood shoulder to shoulder with Joe.

“He passed away this morning at 6:04 am. He always loved the mornings. When Lizzy and I were little, he would always wake us up and say: ‘It’s a beautiful morning! Today’s going to be a good day’... even if it was pouring rain or snowing.”

Joe didn’t know what to say. He didn’t even know if he could talk because the lump in his throat had gotten so big. The best he could do was reach his hand out and lock his fingers with hers.

“Do you want to know how I knew he was gone?” she asked. Joe looked at her and nodded his head even though her eyes were locked on her father. “We were sleeping. I was having this dream... it was of the future. The baby was born, we were married, but Daddy wasn’t sick. He was laughing again and singing, dancing around the yard with my mother like he used to. Then I felt someone kiss my cheek. I woke up thinking it was you but when I looked at you, you were fast asleep. I raised my hand tot he cheek I felt the kiss and it was ice cold. That’s when I knew he was gone. I quietly got out of bed and found Mom and Lizzy standing in here. They had both felt a kiss too...”

“He’ll always be with you,” Joe managed to get out as more tears cascaded down Faith’s face.

“I wasn’t ready to say goodbye,” she sobbed. Joe reached out to her and she fell into his embrace, clinging tightly to his shirt as he rubbed her back, a few tears dripping down his face onto the top of her head. Without speaking he led her to the hallway, reaching out with his right hand to turn the light off and close the door, just one last time.

****

Joe sat at the kitchen counter in Faith’s house, a cup of coffee in front of him, phone in hand. After three rings the person on the other end picked up.

“Hello?”

“Char, it’s me,” he said with a sigh.

“Oh uhm... hey Joe. What’s up? You sound funny,” she said and Joe furrowed his brow as he heard shuffling in the background.

“Yeah um... Faith’s Dad died this morning,” he said and Charlotte let out a small gasp.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry. Is she alright?”

“No but no one really is,” he said but he wasn’t sure if Charlotte was even listening to him. He heard her muttering something and then he heard a man’s voice. “Hey Char, do you happen to know where Nick is? I tried calling him but he didn’t pick up his cell.”

“Nick? Um... yeah... actually he’s uh... he’s right here,” she said and Joe almost choked on the sip of coffee he just took. He heard them arguing through the phone.

“No... I don’t want the damn phone.”

“Your father-in-law just passed away, Nick. Talk to your brother.”

“He’s not my father-in-law anymore,” Joe heard Nick say and his lips pursed in anger.

“Give him the damn phone, Charlotte,” Joe said sternly and he heard Nick sigh.

“What?” Nick asked sounding somewhat angry.

“You should come to the house. Soon. I don’t care that you and Faith are divorced. These people were your family for a long time, Nick.”

“Yeah well they never...”

“Don’t even try, Nick. Just get here,” Joe said before hanging up the phone and slamming it on the counter.

“What’s wrong?” Faith asked, walking into the kitchen, her arms crossed over her chest tightly as if she were trying to hold herself together.

“Nothing,” Joe said, shaking his head pushing all thoughts of why Nick would be at Charlotte’s out of his mind. It was obvious that he had spent the night there from the way that Charlotte was acting and it would explain why he didn’t answer his cell phone but he wasn’t going to mention that to Faith. Not now. Not today.

“Faith? Faith, hun, where are you?” Dani asked as she made her way through the house.

“In the kitchen,” Faith said calmly, not breaking her eye contact with Joe.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Dani said, wrapping her arms tightly around Faith, tears dripping down her face. “I’m so sorry, Faith.”

“It’s alright Dani,” Faith said, wrapping her arms around Danielle. Joe nodded his head to Faith and quietly left the kitchen. His parents were in the living room with Faith’s mother and Kevin and Frankie were standing at the bottom of the stairs, unsure of what to do.

“Hey guys,” Joe said quietly and they both gave him sympathetic smiles. Frankie came up to him first and gave him a hug.

“Sorry man,” he said as Kevin took his place.

“Where’s Lizzy?” Kevin asked and that’s when Joe realized he hadn’t seen her in over an hour.

“I’m not sure...” Joe said.

He turned and walked over to the room William had been in before the funeral director came and took him to the funeral home. The door was slightly ajar and Joe could hear a noise coming. He motioned to Kevin and Frankie to stay back and he’d take care of it. He pushed the door open and Lizzy was sitting in a chair, her head resting in her hands as she leaned over the bed, her body shaking with sobs.

“Lizzy,” Joe whispered, making his way over to her.

“It’s not fair,” she said quietly, sobbing into her sleeve.

“I know it’s not...”

“No. You don’t know. Your parents are still alive. They’re both healthy. You didn’t have to watch them die for the past few years.”

“If I could take your place or Faith’s place I would. You don’t know how much it kills me to see you both suffer, the same goes for your mother. I really do love your sister and I love you. I cannot wait to be your brother,” he said, tears silently dripping down his face as he watched his soon to be baby sister cry herself dry.

Lizzy had calmed down a bit and after a few moments of silence lifted her head. She used the sleeves of her shirt to wipe her eyes dry. Joe reached to his right for the box of tissues sitting on the table and handed it to her. She grabbed a couple and blew her nose, laughing nervously and looking up at Joe.

“You really, really love her, don’t you?” she asked, already knowing the answer.

“I really, really do,” Joe said, looking down at his feet and smiling before looking up at Lizzy. She reached out to grab Joe’s hand and gave it a light squeeze.

“I am praying so hard that this baby is yours,” she whispered. “If it’s Nick’s... I don’t even know what I will do.”

“You and me both, Lizzy,” Joe said quietly. “Now, what do you say? Are you ready to go back out there? My family’s arriving and they really want to see you.”

“Yeah, let’s go,” she said, standing up. Joe stood up and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. He was surprised when she rested her head on his shoulder as he led her out to the living room. He kissed the top of her head knowing that he had finally gained Lizzy’s respect.

****

Around eight o’clock that night, many friends of Faith’s had stopped by to give their regrets, many family members from out of state had called, and the Jonas family was still there. Everyone except Nick who had yet to show up yet alone call. Faith was curled up on the couch with Dani and Denise while Meg and Lizzy curled together. Joe, Kevin, Frankie, and Kevin Sr. were taking care of all of the food that had been brought over. Joe brought cups of tea out to all of the women in the living room when the doorbell rang.

“I’ve got it,” Frankie said, heading to the door. As he opened it Joe looked up out of curiosity and held his breath as Nick walked in, a bouquet of flowers in his hand. It took all he had not to drop Meg’s cup of tea as he was handing it to her when he saw Charlotte walk in behind Nick.

“Faith,” Nick said quietly, no emotion on his face at all. Faith looked up and her eyebrow arched when she saw Charlotte. She exchanged a look with Danielle before getting up and walking over to Nick. He extended his left arm and pulled her into an awkward hug.

“Here,” Frankie said, taking the flowers from Nick. He brought them into the dining room and set them on the table. The whole time Joe just watched, his eyes on Charlotte who was looking everywhere but at him.

“Hi, Charlotte,” Faith whispered. “Thank you for coming.”

“Of course,” Charlotte said, stepping forward and giving Faith a hug. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

“Thank you,” Faith said, turning to look at Joe. He shrugged his shoulders ever so slightly that it almost looked like he didn’t move.

“Mrs. Dougray,” Charlotte said somberly as she walked towards Faith’s mother. Joe rolled his eyes and left the room, going into the kitchen to join Kevin.

“Frankie stopped in here and told me that Nick is here with Charlotte,” he whispered to Joe who simply nodded his head. “What’s that all about?”

“I know as much as you do, Kev,” Joe whispered. “I had to call Charlotte earlier because Nick hadn’t picked up his cell phone or his house phone and he was there with her. I think he spent the night.”

“You think he spent the night, spent the night? Or just... spend the night?”

“Kevin, we’re adults here,” Joe said, shaking his head. “I think he slept with Charlotte last night. He lied to us, Kevin.”

“Well... maybe but maybe he didn’t. Maybe it was impulsive.”

“If it was impulsive I don’t think Charlotte would be here with him because if it were impulsive the day after would be awkward, especially if they’re not dating like Nick had said.”

“He’s a big boy, Joe. What he does is none of our business really.”

“Yeah but... why would he lie to us? We’re his brothers he knows he can tell us everything,” Joe said, leaning against the counter and crossing his arms.

“Sure but after everything that’s happened recently can you blame him?” Kevin asked, shrugging his shoulders. Joe sighed and dipped his head down, bringing his right hand up and pinching the bridge of his nose.

“No, I guess not,” he said.

“So, should we go out there?” Kevin asked, motioning towards the living room with his shoulder. “For Faith?”

“Yeah, let’s go,” Joe said, stepping forward and leading the way.

****

A few days later was the funeral. Joe headed to the church to meet his family there. Faith, Lizzy, and their mother were being picked up by the funeral services limo to be brought to the church. When Joe arrived he helped the funeral director set up the rest of the bouquets from family and friends where the casket would be in front of the altar.

“Hey Joe,” Kevin said, walking in with Dani who already had slight tear stains on her cheeks.

“Hey,” Joe said, walking over and hugging them both. “Mom and Dad are in the second pew with Frankie,” he said, pointing to their parents.

“Is Nick here yet?” Kevin asked as Danielle made her way to the front of the church.

“No,” Joe said, shaking his head.

“Well, if he gets here late there are still five of us as pall bearers for when they bring William in.”

“He should be here,” Joe said, a hint of anger in his voice.

“I know,” Kevin said, putting a hand on Joe’s shoulder. “Come get us when everything’s ready.

“I will,” Joe said, heading to the doors. Through the window he could see the limo pulling up behind the hearse. He headed outside to lead the women in.

“Hey,” he whispered to Faith as he helped her out of the car. She couldn’t speak. She simply wrapped her arms around his waist and squeezed him tight as her mother and sister stepped out of the car.

“If you just head inside the foyer for everything to be finished setting up we can begin. I believe most everybody is here,” the funeral director said.

“Thank you,” Joe said, linking his arm with Faith’s and leading her inside. Meg and Lizzy walked behind them arm in arm. “Just wait here and I’ll go get my family.”

Faith nodded her head and sat down on one of the couches, her mother and sister sitting on either side of her. Joe walked down the aisle to where his family was. He caught Kevin’s eye and waved him over. Kevin grabbed his father and Frankie and they walked down the aisle towards Joe.

“Is Nicholas here yet?” Kevin Sr. asked.

“No,” Joe said and he saw his father purse his lips out of disappointment. “Dad...”

“I know, son,” he said, putting his hand on Joe’s shoulder as they reached the foyer.

“Are you all ready?” the funeral director asked. Joe nodded his head as well as some of the others. “Okay, I need the pall bearers outside.”

Joe, his brothers, and their father headed outside. Joe looked over his shoulder and saw Faith counting them, her eyes widening when she saw Nick wasn’t there before scrunching her brow in anger. He turned to face forward and took his place on the left side of the casket behind Frankie. The funeral director and Faith’s uncle, William’s brother Mark took the back two spots behind Joe and his father. The funeral director nodded to the priest who helped Meg stand up. He followed the altar servers into the church with Meg, Lizzy, and Faith behind him, Joe and the others following with the casket.

Faith, Meg, and Lizzy took their seats in the front pew and as Joe walked down the rest of the aisle he saw his mother and Dani place hands on Meg and Faith’s shoulders respectively. They rolled the casket into position and set the brakes on the wheels so it wouldn’t move and then took their seats. Joe looked over his shoulder as he sat down to see if Nick had come in yet and so far, nothing. He sighed and turned to the front as the priest started the service. About twenty minutes in the doors of the church opened and Joe turned again when he heard footsteps and he saw Nick walking in... with Charlotte on his heels. He couldn’t tell from the angle he was at but it looked like they were holding hands. They sat a few pews back from he and the rest of his family were sitting. He turned his attention back to the priest as he continued with the service.

Another fifteen minutes later and it was time for Faith to go up to give her eulogy. Her hands shaking she walked up to the altar and took the priests spot at the pulpit. She adjusted the microphone and looked out to the occupants of the pews, her friends and family.

“Hello everyone. For those of you who may not know me, my name is Faith Dougray and I’m William’s oldest daughter. My father was a very good man. He loved his job, he loved his family... he loved life in general,” she started with. Joe listened intently as she gave her accounts of family vacations and most memorable moments of her father. When she was getting near the end of the eulogy a cell phone started to ring at full volume catching everyone’s attention.

Faith looked up and out into the church. Everyone turned in their seats to see where the disturbance was coming from. Joe caught sight of a curly head of dark hair leaving the church, a phone held to head. He turned to see if Faith had seen but when he looked she wasn’t at the pulpit anymore. Standing up he saw she was already halfway down the aisle. He scrambled over Frankie’s legs and walked quickly after her.
Joe reached the foyer and could see Nick pacing on the stairs of the church talking on his phone. Faith walked down the steps but Nick ignored her as she stood in front of him, appalled. Joe stood in the doorway, watching to see if he would need to intervene.

“Nicholas Jerry Jonas, if you don’t hang that phone up right now I will drag your ass from here to China!” Faith shouted, trying to grab the phone from him.

“Just calm down, Faith,” Nick said. Joe turned when he heard heels walking towards him thinking it would be Dani but he was startled to see it was Charlotte. She again avoided looking at him.

“Calm down? Calm down?! My father is lying dead in a wooden box in front of hundreds of people waiting to be buried and you want me to calm down?” she screamed at the top of her lungs and Joe could hear people inside the church muttering to one another, a few gasps here and there. “He is your father-in-law, Nick.”

“He was my father-in-law.”

“Does it really make a difference? You’ve known him for years! Just because you don’t love me anymore doesn’t mean you have to stop loving him too.”

“I never said I stopped loving you!” Nick shouted.

Joe’s eyes widened as he watched Faith’s arms go limp as her shoulders relaxed. Charlotte’s breath caught in her throat. Faith took a few steps away from Nick who dropped his head down. Joe didn’t know what to do, none of them did.

“I’m sorry,” Nick whispered, looking up at Charlotte and nodding his head slightly. She hesitated, glancing over at Joe whose eyes were on Faith before walking to Nick. He grabbed her hand and together they left while Joe and Faith stood there, watching as they walked away.

After the car had left the parking lot, Faith turned to go back inside. Joe stood up straight and let her pass him as she went into the church, fresh tears on her face. He looked back to the road as Nick’s car took one final turn before going out of sight. Not knowing what else to do he walked back into the church taking his seat as Faith took her place back at the pulpit to finish her eulogy. Things just got a lot more complicated and Joe could see Kevin and Frankie looking at him in his peripheral vision but he kept his eyes on Faith as she tried her hardest to compose herself as the tears continued to fall. With this confession, he had no idea where his life was turning now.