Tour With Me

Natalie’s POV

“He said what!!!” Sabrina cheerfully screamed.

I winced slightly from the unexpected loud sound. I had just explained to Sabrina everything that happened between me and Justin a mere few hours ago. Her reaction was expected, while mine was unexplainable. I was still in complete shock about everything that happened.

“He told me that he was in love with me and that he loved everything about me,” I spoke.

I quickly placed another spoonful of my Ben & Jerry’s New York Super Chunk Ice Cream into my mouth. I craved chocolate more than I ever had before. I had eaten nearly half of my stash and the day wasn’t even over yet. I was terrified about how many calories that I was consuming, but at this point I could care less. Chocolate was the most comforting thing that I had right now.

Sabrina let out one of the grisliest screams that I had heard. I winced once more as I swallowed my ice cream. I was beginning to regret telling her what happened.

She sounded as bad as some of Justin’s fans. She alone sounded like thousands of his fans at one of our concerts.

She continued to squeal as she jumped onto the bed that I was currently occupying. I bounced slightly as she continued to bounce on the bed excitedly. She grabbed my shoulders as she started shaking me.

“What did you say, what did you say, WHAT DID YOU SAY?!”

“Get off of me!!” I screamed.

She stopped shaking me as her eyes widened. Her arms dropped down to her sides. “You told him to get off of you. What the hell Natalie that’s one of the worst things that you could—”

“Shut-up,” I interrupted. “That’s not what I told him, that’s what I’m telling you,”

“Oh, sorry. Well what did you tell him?”

I sighed before eating more ice cream. I closed my eyes as the amazing indescribable flavor slid down my throat. I opened my eyes to fine myself staring at an impatient Sabrina.

“I didn’t say anything,” I quietly confessed.

She jumped off the bed, staring at me in disbelief. “You what!! Nat what’s wrong with you?”

“I don’t know!! If I knew then I wouldn’t be sitting here gaining five pounds and stressing out while I feed my addiction!!”

“You were supposed to say that you loved him too!!”

“Well how can I say it if I don’t mean it!!”

Sabrina’s shoulders slumped as she sent me a sympathetic look. I sighed before eating more ice cream. My stomach began to turn in knots, and not the way that it usually does. I felt as if I was going to throw up. My stomach felt empty yet full at the same time. I had never felt so emotionally sick before.

“You don’t love him?” she softly questioned.

I sighed. I set the now empty carton on the night stand before I lay back on the bed. I closed my eyes as I let out an exasperated breath.

“It’s not that I don’t love him…it’s just that…I don’t know if I do,”

“I mean I’ve never been in love before so I don’t know if I really do. I don’t want to be one of those teenage girls who fall in love with a guy just because he’s a good boyfriend, When I fall in love I want to actually…you know…fall in love. I don’t want to confuse teenage love with real love. I want to know if I love him or not and…well I don’t.

“I don’t even know if he really loves me or if he’s just infatuated with me,”

Sabrina sat down on the bed, letting her legs hang over the edge. Her eyes were soft, and her expression was sympathetic. For once she wasn’t smiling. She was completely serious.

“Nat, he really does love you…and he has for a while,” she softly spoke.

I raised my brow as I looked at her. She licked her lips as she took a deep breath. “He told me a little while back that he was in love with you. He didn’t mean to say it just sort of…well…slipped out and I happened to hear it. You were asleep on his chest during the movie when it kind of slipped out. I coaxed it out of him, because he wasn’t planning on telling me,”

“Anyway, he really does love you Natalie. The way that he stares at you, the way that he notices the little things about you. How he tries his hardest to make you smile, there all signs that he’s in love with you. I know that it may seem like infatuation but it’s not. You guys aren’t cute enough for it to be infatuation,”

I sat up on the bed as I stared at her. I folded my arms as I raised my brow at her. Normally I wouldn’t feel so insulted by what she had said, but I was feeling extremely touchy today. I wasn’t exactly in the mood that I would normally be in.

She held her hands up in mock surrender. “I didn’t mean it like that. I meant that you guys’ relationship is too real for it to be teenage love. Teenage love has tons of puppy names, a lot more PDA less understanding and being completely unaware of anything that is going on that doesn’t have to do with the other person,”

“You guys’ relationship is more…real. If something goes wrong you guys actually talk it out rather than fighting. You guys may hate spending time away from each other but you will do it if you have to. You don’t send each other little cute texts all throughout the day, though I know that you both want to. Your relationship seems more…mature than the average teenage relationship. The only difference is that you guys are still insanely hormone crazed but other than that you guys don’t have teen love. You have real love,”

“Well thanks because that doesn’t confuse me even more,” I muttered.

“Did you at least tell him how you felt about him or did you really walk out without another word?”

“I didn’t walk out, he did. And I wasn’t completely silent. I stared at him for a while before I told him that I didn’t know what to say. I said that I wish I did and that I wasn’t going to make him feel even worse by saying this but I didn’t know if I felt the same way,”

“He said that it was fine and that he just wanted me to tell him when I was sure and that he wasn’t going to pressure me. This only made me feel worse especially since I knew that he was lying,”

“Well maybe he wasn’t. Maybe that is how he felt but he just feels something else more,”

“Mhm, sure he does,”

I closed my eyes as I sighed once more. I mindlessly found myself reaching up and grabbing the necklace that Justin had given to me. I mindlessly twirled it between my fingers.

“Well why don’t you get ready for tonight. It’ll take your mind off of things you know,” Sabrina spoke.

Tonight Allan was making it up to me and Sabrina. Somehow he had managed to get us the VIP treatment at Club Paris in Orlando. Tonight happened to be teen night so we were allowed to go, but we received the red carpet treatment. I had no idea how he was able to pull these strings nor did I care.

I shook my head as I opened my eyes. “I don’t think I’m going to go tonight. I might need some time to think…”

“Uh, no you’re going,” Sabrina began. “You’ve already showered and changed, I don’t see why you can’t throw on some clothes and go. You always say that dancing helps you relive stress, well imagine what dancing all night would do. Besides you don’t want to leave me alone with Allan and Thomas, do you?”

I pursed my lips to the side as I thought it over. After a few moments of silence, and puppy dog looks from Sabrina, I agreed to go. Besides, what kind of party girl would I be if I turned down an opportunity like this?

“Alright I’ll go. But I’m not going for you; I’m going to relieve some stress, okay,”

“Yeah, that’s what they all say,”

Sabrina giggled as she skipped towards her closet, to decide what she was going to wear. I shook my head as a small smile began to form on my lips. She was still the same Sabrina.

I sighed as I continued to hold my necklace in my hand. I looked down at it as I continued to twirl it in my fingers.

Maybe this was what I needed. Maybe all I needed to do was have a stress free night with my friends. I needed to focus on something that wasn’t Justin for a while. I didn’t want to over think the situation like I normally would. I simply needed to clear my head. A night out with friends would do that. No stress, nothing but fun. That’s exactly what I needed.

If only my night would have turned out that way.