Horrid Thoughts with Hard Questions
Burned Out City Lights
“Shit…” I mumble to myself as we’re waiting for a taxi.
“What’s wrong, Lizzy?” Claire asks, looking at me with those huge hazel eyes. The ones that make her seem so small.
“Oh, I…dropped my change…” I reply, pretending to pick up loose change from the ground. I didn’t mean to say it out loud. We are almost broke. I only have a couple hundred dollars left to spend on food and supplies. “Claire, it’s nice out. We should walk back!” I say, cheerfully. I refuse to tell her it’s because I can’t afford a ride.
“Oh, all right. I can’t get much dirtier today anyway.”
We don’t talk much as we walk. Claire is too busy absorbing the city sounds and smells. I concentrate on where we are going, using my map to navigate. Being from a small town, I’m used to knowing where everything is. I’m not so good at this map thing.
“I’m pretty sure we go left at this intersection.”
“You don’t’ sound so sure, Lizzy. Maybe we should ask someone.”
“No, I can get us there! We don’t need anyone’s help. I will get you back just fine.”
We turn left at the light and walk silently some more. I continue to stare at the map, now without the slightest idea of where we are going. I’m concentrating so hard that I don’t notice how quiet it is down this way.
BANG!
It sounds like a clap of thunder the way he hits the side of the garbage bin. I grab onto Claire’s arm so tight I’m sure I’ll be leaving some bruises.
“Well hello, ladies” he says with a raise of his eyebrows.
Fuck…“Get behind me, Claire” I whisper as calmly as possible. The man looks middle aged, maybe in his early thirties. He has the build of a skinny white guy, but with a little bit of a bulge sticking out of his midsection. I’ve seen the look on his face numerous times before, from some of the same men my mother brought home.
“Claire, huh? Very sexy…” He starts walking closer and I back up—pushing Claire as I go. I refuse to speak to him. My expression is hard, but strong.
“Aren’t very chatty today are we…well…” Then I hear the click of a gun. He’s pointing it straight at me. I’m pretty sure every bone in my body shatters, and I hear it all in my head. But I don’t dare to move.
“I want your cash. Now.”
I pull it out and throw it at him—all two hundred of it. The money doesn’t travel very far, so he has to come over and pick it up. After he reaches it, he gets about an inch from my face. He smells like cheap beer and marijuana.
“That wasn’t so bad now was it?” He smirks. Then he grabs my ass, and I push Claire back as far as possible. I’m scared if I stop him he’ll go after her, instead. He stares at me for a few more seconds and I feel sure he’s going to try something, but he lets go and turns to leave. “See ya later, beautiful,” he barks as he walks away, sticking the gun back in his pocket.
I’m frozen solid and white as a sheet.
“Holy shit, Elizabeth, are you okay?” Claire runs to me and starts shaking me by the shoulders. I can’t speak. She wraps me in a hug. “I was so scared. He could have killed us both.” I can hear her voice shaking. She’s starting to cry. I get enough feeling back in my arms to put them around her.
“I love you, Lizzy.”
“I love you too, Claire.”
You have no idea how much.
“What’s wrong, Lizzy?” Claire asks, looking at me with those huge hazel eyes. The ones that make her seem so small.
“Oh, I…dropped my change…” I reply, pretending to pick up loose change from the ground. I didn’t mean to say it out loud. We are almost broke. I only have a couple hundred dollars left to spend on food and supplies. “Claire, it’s nice out. We should walk back!” I say, cheerfully. I refuse to tell her it’s because I can’t afford a ride.
“Oh, all right. I can’t get much dirtier today anyway.”
We don’t talk much as we walk. Claire is too busy absorbing the city sounds and smells. I concentrate on where we are going, using my map to navigate. Being from a small town, I’m used to knowing where everything is. I’m not so good at this map thing.
“I’m pretty sure we go left at this intersection.”
“You don’t’ sound so sure, Lizzy. Maybe we should ask someone.”
“No, I can get us there! We don’t need anyone’s help. I will get you back just fine.”
We turn left at the light and walk silently some more. I continue to stare at the map, now without the slightest idea of where we are going. I’m concentrating so hard that I don’t notice how quiet it is down this way.
BANG!
It sounds like a clap of thunder the way he hits the side of the garbage bin. I grab onto Claire’s arm so tight I’m sure I’ll be leaving some bruises.
“Well hello, ladies” he says with a raise of his eyebrows.
Fuck…“Get behind me, Claire” I whisper as calmly as possible. The man looks middle aged, maybe in his early thirties. He has the build of a skinny white guy, but with a little bit of a bulge sticking out of his midsection. I’ve seen the look on his face numerous times before, from some of the same men my mother brought home.
“Claire, huh? Very sexy…” He starts walking closer and I back up—pushing Claire as I go. I refuse to speak to him. My expression is hard, but strong.
“Aren’t very chatty today are we…well…” Then I hear the click of a gun. He’s pointing it straight at me. I’m pretty sure every bone in my body shatters, and I hear it all in my head. But I don’t dare to move.
“I want your cash. Now.”
I pull it out and throw it at him—all two hundred of it. The money doesn’t travel very far, so he has to come over and pick it up. After he reaches it, he gets about an inch from my face. He smells like cheap beer and marijuana.
“That wasn’t so bad now was it?” He smirks. Then he grabs my ass, and I push Claire back as far as possible. I’m scared if I stop him he’ll go after her, instead. He stares at me for a few more seconds and I feel sure he’s going to try something, but he lets go and turns to leave. “See ya later, beautiful,” he barks as he walks away, sticking the gun back in his pocket.
I’m frozen solid and white as a sheet.
“Holy shit, Elizabeth, are you okay?” Claire runs to me and starts shaking me by the shoulders. I can’t speak. She wraps me in a hug. “I was so scared. He could have killed us both.” I can hear her voice shaking. She’s starting to cry. I get enough feeling back in my arms to put them around her.
“I love you, Lizzy.”
“I love you too, Claire.”
You have no idea how much.