Did You Have To Turn Your Back When Forever Didn't Last?

Days went by in a blur. The baby shower passed in a haze. Life was a constant just getting by for me. I didn’t know what to do with myself really. Then at my weakest point came salvation. Truth is I was reliving the past, but if anyone asked I was cleaning out the closet. In the back of the apartment was a room where we kept our old things. Mementos from our years together. Pictures and items I honestly forgot we had. That’s where I found it. My old skateboard that I used to ride everywhere. It was my baby. I had it custom made for me. I did the artwork, every single piece was my doing. Some days I missed that life. Before New York or Crimson. Further on then running away. Even pervious to Metro Station or the accident. I was always a wild child. I did everything wrong. But I was smart. Smarter than my older brother even. I could have been great. A rocket scientist or an engineer, but I choose love. I was lost when it came to love. I was a hopeless cause when I met Trace. There was no chance for me from that first second I saw him.

“Kids, we have new neighbors. I want you both to give them these and welcome them to the neighborhood. Kelsey you look nice, what happened?” Mom was staring at me and I played with the bottom of the dress I was put into. This was the daughter she wished I had been all my life.
“Um, my freakish triplet friends attacked me.” I replied as she handed Cam the plate trusting him with the baked goods instead of me. Well, he was the responsible one.
“Go on you two and no eating them.” Cam and I stepped out and I ran to the garage.
“You’re not taking your skateboard.” I grunted and followed him on foot. What if there’s a boy? Never mind knowing the people here if there is, he’s a prep. Not my type. I don’t like preps. But what if they go to my school? Wait, I don’t usually hang out with people at my school. “Kelsey stop if you keep playing with your dress it going to rip. Oh look here’s the house.” He walked up the path I slowly followed behind him. He rang the doorbell. A second later it opened to reveal a tall guy with brownish hair, probably blonde not too long ago. I peeked over Cam’s shoulder to look at him. Stared at his eyes, blue eyes. I faintly remembered them from somewhere. I couldn’t pull mine away from his. They are the sky slightly covered in almost translucent clouds. They are the sea in the winter. They are like cotton candy. I snapped out of my thoughts. “Hey I’m Cam. This is my little sister.” Cam pulled me out from behind him. I stumbled into his side. The boy held his hand out so someone could shake it. I took it fast and held it. It was warm and huge compared to his.
“Kelsey.” I whispered and let out a tiny giggle. He chuckled at me and said with a slight southern accent;
“I'm Trace.” We stood there for a couple of seconds just staring at each other and holding hands before a short blonde girl came out. She looked at me and Trace, I sighed at the name as it passed through my mind.
“You already have a girlfriend or is she just your future whore.” She had a accent too. I dropped his hand and felt my face burn red. I really am turning really girly. Since when do I blush. Shit.

That moment changed my life. The whole path I was on was altered. He became Cam’s best friend and party buddy. Which sort of left me in the dark for awhile. A guy wouldn’t just fall in love with his friend’s little sister. But still I was hopelessly caught in his web since we met and this was something that drove me over the edge.

“Cyrus, I may seem all innocent to you and every other fucking person, but I’m not. I have been going to them since I was eleven. I get insanely drunk every time. Really, Trace you could do better? There are tons of willing girls there just waiting for some guy to put their-”
“Okay, I know your not the innocent type. All I see at those party’s are whores and clingers. I like neither and both are quite annoying.” We made it to the building. My locker wasn’t far and when we got there I stopped. “I’ll see you in a bit.”
“Oh yeah, We have chemistry together.” I knew how weird it sounded funny as soon as it rolled off my tongue. He nodded and waved walking to his own locker. “So much chemistry.”
“You look strange…”
“Today. What…”
“Happened to you?” They were finishing each others sentences.
“I’m falling.” I replied. Those blue eyes made it worse.
“No you’re not?” Ariella confusedly questioned. Arietta tapped her arm.
“She’s falling for someone, idiot.”
“It’s the new guy with blue eyes, isn’t it the one you walked in with.” Adrian pushed.

I pulled another box toward me and found it to be full of my teenaged clothes. Half way through it was this black leather tube mini dress. It zipped up the front and was easy to move in if I recalled properly from the nights I wore it to parties. The one party that stood out most was one a attended with Trace. The one I left with Trace. Although he doesn’t remember that night. I wasn’t as drunk as he was.

He pulled in to a drive and parked in the grass the party was in full swing already. I smiled and ran for the house. Once in I blended into the dance floor. I found a random guy and started dancing with him. I kept tabs on Trace as I did that. He stood by the keg red plastic cup and cigarette in hand. I felt the guy, whom I was dancing with, put his warm hands on my body. He’s just the first of many guys I’ll dance with tonight. Trace had another drink. He just kept going. I stopped dancing and walked through the crowd to him. I took the drink he was about to consume and drank it myself. “Trying to kill yourself?” He ignored me and grabbed another. I took that one too. He just kept going and I kept taking. Soon I was giggling. “Come on. Let’s just dance.” I took his hand and pulled him away and into the crowd of touching bodies. We didn’t go in far. We stopped and started dancing very closely. Our bodies melted together, they where like one. Like two liquids poured in one glass. Everything was blurry in the changing lights. Some one asked a question, the voice oddly familiar. I caught the response from Trace, but it’s blurred in my head. I smiled and pulled him outside. I think is said something stupid to get him into my bed. He grinned and pulled me toward a car, I think it was the one from earlier. As we drove the streets toward my house I drew random shapes with my finger on Trace’s thigh. He tried his best to pay attention and soon enough we reached my house. He pulled me into him. His lips colliding with mine. I smiled when I got out of the car with my soccer warm ups.
“Five minutes and I’ll be through your window.”
“It’s the one with purple curtains. It‘ll be open.” I walked up and through the front door. The note on the door I found said my mom would be gone all weekend. I smiled more and ran to my room locking the door behind me. I sat on my bed and un-zipped the back of my shoes. I threw them in the corner and removed my socks. Took out my earrings and necklace set them on my dresser. I turned on some angry music. I sat on the edge of my bed. Grinned as I saw a figure climb through my window. I smiled as he walked toward me his jacket falling to the floor. In front of me he stood as I undid the lowest button of his shirt.

At once I realized he did remember that night. The lyrics of a song played in my head. Control. That night was that song. He never said anything about remembering it. That first instance of us. He didn’t even mention even wanting me until I woke up from my coma with him by my side. Why? My past with him was a broken mess. My future with him is a broken mess. Nothing ever changes.