In Your Mind

----Kyle's P.O.V----

It's been three days since I've last seen my Dad. Things are fine between me and Jinx... It's just...... My Dad.

I sighed and rubbed my temples in annoyance. I put my elbows on the counter and began to drum my fingers across the cold tile.

I glanced up the clock before picking up my phone.

24 missed calls.

I swallowed and licked my lips before I pressed send.

I nervously brushed my hair across my face as the dial tone seemed to go on forever, almost mockingly.

"Hello?" My dad's gruff voice answered.

I picked at the hem of my shirt before coughing, "Uh, it's me, Kyle..."

A light rustling sound echoed across the phone line as I hopped off the bar stool. I walked into the living room and crawled onto the couch.

"How are you, Kyle?"

"I"m f-fine," I stammered. "What about you?"

He sighed, "I feel terrible, I shouldn't have done what I did.."

I laughed nervously. "What else could you do?"

"I could have been more rational about it,"

I bite my lip before sighing. "Well... I'm sorry,"

Why am I saying this?

Oh yeah, I'm weak and stupid and just screwed up in the head. Ever since the day at my moms house, I've been thinking alot.

Too much, actually.

I've been thinking about life...

Life without Jinx.

My Jinx.

"It's fine, son," He seemed to wave it off carelessly. "Are you and that... boy, still together?"

"J-jinx?" I questioned, "Yeah.."

He sighed and mumbled something incoherent. "You should end it with him,"

"Why?"

My question seemed to catch him off guard. A stunned silence seemed to pass over us as more rustling was heard on his end.

"It's just, he's not your type, You could do better."

You could do better....

The last sentence seemed to ring in my head. I began to picture myself without Jinx... I continued to reply it over and over, constantly.

Maybe my dad's right..

I mean, life was perfect without Jinx. I did what I wanted, who I wanted. I didn't have to worry about who's gonna disown me or who's gonna stop loving me.

All I had to worry about was getting my mom and two sisters the perfect birthday presents and everyone would be happy.

But no.

Now I have to worry about keeping Jinx away from my dad, sticking to the promise John O'callaghan threatened me with and keeping the fans happy...

Clearly too much to handle in my life.

I can't even match clothes for crying out loud!

"Kyle?"

I snapped out of my thoughts and coughed, "Uh, yeah?"

"Are you?"

"What?"

"Are you going to end things with him?"

Am I?

Should I?

Can I?

I licked my lips and nervously scratched my head. Do I even have the guts to end things with Jinx? Where would I do it?

I can't do it in Arizona, with all of his friends and family..

That would kill me.

Literally.

I let out a shaky breath as I glanced out the front window to see Jinx and Caleb strolling up the sidewalk.

"I have to go, Dad,"

"Alright, but remember what I said."

I ended the call and clutched the phone in my hand before laying it on the counter. The door knob jingled before it swung open. Jinx and Caleb ran in, grinning.

"Hey Kyle," Caleb greeted, eying me strangely. "Something wrong?"

"N-no, I'm fine," I lied.

"Alright..." He trailed off, unconvinced. "I'm leaving, me and the rest of the guys are having a game day, you can come too,"

I shrugged. "I think me and Jinx are gonna chill here, y'know, time alone,"

"Alright,"

The door slammed shut behind him and I looked up at the stairs as Jinx jogged down. He frowned quickly as he noticed Caleb was gone.

"Where did he go?"

"Game day, with the guys,"

"Oh," He mumbled,.

The word fell silent as we stood in the kitchen. I leaned against the counter, twisting the cap on my bottle around and around, nervous about being alone with him with so many words unsaid and no idea where to begin.

"Whats wrong?"

"What do you mean?" I questioned.

He rolled his eyes and walked closer towards me, "I've known you long enough to know when some thing's bothering you,"

"We should talk." I blurted out without thinking.

He froze mid step and swallowed. "About what?"

"About...us." I choked out.

"What about us?" he eyed me suspiciously.

I honestly have no clue to what I should say. My thoughts are too jumbled up to say anything meaningful.