When You Look Me In The Eyes

It’s been one and a half months since I met the Jonas’s. I’m already getting attached to them. Their a real family. Their like one of those families you see in those happy movies. Only this isn’t acting, it’s real. It amazes me that they all love each other so much. I mean sure they get into fights every now and then. But they still love each other all the same. Even after one brother breaks the trust of another brother. They get over it. That’s not how I do things.

Once someone breaks my trust I never talk to them again. I’m not the type of person to forgive and forget. It takes a lot for me to forgive someone, but even at that our friendship is never the same again. Once they lie I drop them. Sometimes I wish it wasn’t like that, but it is. I wish my family was like their family.

Sure my brother, sister, and I all love each other but for the rest of my family? I obviously haven’t forgiven my dad for everything he has put me and my family through. I could never forgive him. So the only family I really have is my sister and brother. But I also consider Lilly my family. I just wish I had more family. More people I could trust.

But anyways, enough about my pathetic family. Lilly and I are planning a trip. To where you may ask. It’s called Camp James. Yes we will be camping. My family and I used go there every summer up until a two years before my mom died. Its actually where I have some good memories of my entire family. Including my dad. Camp James is located right next to Kernville. And going through Kernville is The Kern River. My family used to camp on the river. Literally we were less than six feet from the river.

But since my family obviously doesn’t go anymore I am taking Lilly with me. I know it will be so much fun. I’ve already booked the camp site. We leave in just three days. We are planning on staying for about three weeks. I know it sounds like a long time but it isn’t. My family used to spend the entire summer there. Yep you heard right.

Since it will be hot Lilly and I are going shopping for some cool clothes. Once I got done showering we would leave. Once I got out of the shower I did my makeup and left my hair down. Then I got dressed and headed outside to have a cigarette. I sat on our patio and lit up. After taking a few hits I felt awesome. Then I heard people talking. I couldn’t tell who it was so I listened carefully.

“So what should we do today?” Someone asked.
“I have no clue.” Someone else said.
“Want to go see if Poppy and Lilly want to hang out?” Nick said. I don’t get it. Why does he like me so much. What’s so interesting about me?
“Sure. Lets cut through her patio.” Joe said. Shit. He’s coming here. They will smell the smoke. I quickly took one last hit then put out my cigarette. I ran for the doors and went inside. Then I ran up the stairs and into my bedroom. I quickly sprayed on some body spray. Hopefully it would take most of the smell away. Then I heard a knock.
“Just come in I’ll be down in a minute!” I shouted down the stairs. I ran into my bathroom and brushed my teeth. I just hope they wouldn’t smell the smoke on my breath. After I was done I went downstairs and saw Joe and Nick waiting in the kitchen.

“You do realize we could have been killers and we could have just walked up to your room and killed you right?” Joe asked.
“Save me the lecture will you? I have to go meet Lilly at the mall.” I said grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge.
“Why?” Joe asked.
“Were going shopping for some clothes before we go camping.” I said.
“Oh cool. Well do you guys want to hang out later?” Nick asked.
“Uh sure. When were done we’ll come over.” I said. Then they left and I went shopping. We didn’t buy much. Just some swim suits and a few outfits. After we were done we went home and unpacked then we went over to Nicks house.

“So you’re leaving us?” Kevin joked.
“Yeah kind of.” I said.
“But what will we do without you?” Joe asked.
“Well I mean you guys could come with us if you want.” I said.
“Seriously?” Nick asked.
“Yeah sure.” Lilly said.
“Sweet when do you leave?” Joe asked.
“Two days.” Lilly and I both said.
“Oh.” Joe said.
“What would we need?” Kevin asked.
“Umm well a tent, sleeping bag, and an air mattress.” I said.
“We could go buy that stuff now.” Kevin said.
“Yeah. You guys want to come?” Joe asked.
“Sure.” Lilly said.
“Uh. I cant.” I said.
“Why not?” Lilly looked at me suspiciously.
“Remember that thing. But you can go.” I said quickly.
“Can I talk to you alone?” Lilly asked. I nodded my head and followed her out the door.
“You’re going to that party aren’t you?” She asked.
“So what if I am?” I asked.
“You know what happened last time you went to one of Mikey’s party’s.” She said. That was true. I do know. Last time some guy slipped something in my drink and I almost ended up getting raped. Luckily Lilly called my brother and he took down the guy.
“I’ll be careful this time.” I said.
“Fine.” she sighed.
“I promise. And if anything happens I’ll call you.” I said.
“Ok. Just don’t get too drunk.” She said.
“I won’t.” I said. After we were done with our little chat she went back inside and I went home to change. After I was done I got in my car and left.