My Toxic Valentine

Alex had fucked up big time.

That much was obvious when Jack had run screaming from his house.

Well, he hadn’t actually been screaming but Alex figured he probably would’ve been if he hadn’t been so freaked out that he couldn’t make a noise.

When he’d heard the front door close behind Jack, Alex had… well, gone ape-shit basically, and picked up the object closest to him; throwing it across the room.

Unfortunately, this happened to be his cell phone, which hit the wall opposite and shattered, the pieces lying in a pile on the tiles.

He groaned, bringing his hands to his face. He really hadn’t thought that through.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” Alex muttered under his breath as he paced the kitchen, trying to figure out how he could have read Jack so wrong.

A knock on the door startled him from this reflection, however, and he felt his heart jump and he couldn’t help but hope it was Jack.

He practically sprinted to the hall and threw open the front door, willing it to be Jack standing on the other side.

It wasn’t.

Alex slammed the door in the pizza delivery guy’s face before storming upstairs.

Neither of them were having a very good night.
-

It was now Monday. 3 days had passed since Alex had completely assed things up with Jack. He was at school, throwing books haphazardly in to his locker when Rian appeared beside him and leant up against the bay of lockers.

“Hey, bro. What’re you doing this arvo?”

“Nothing, why?” Alex said, slamming his locker door shut.

Rian raised an eyebrow at him, which Alex chose to ignore. “A bunch of us are gonna chill in the city for a bit. You interested?”

Alex shrugged. “Nah, I think I’ll just head home.”

“Oh, come on, man. We can go perve on the hot private school chicks,” he said, nudging Alex.

“Rian, all the girls you know are ‘hot private school chicks’…” Alex pointed out, rolling his eyes.

“Whatever,” Rian said “Point still stands.”

While hot private school chicks, or chicks of any kind, weren’t much of a drawcard for Alex, Rian wasn’t to know. He figured he might as well appease his friend and, besides, it’s not like he had anything better to do.

“Fine,” Alex said with a dramatic sigh “Who else is coming and what’s the plan?”

“Oh, you know. The usual. Zack, Joe, Pete, Sean. Thought we might go grab some food. I’m starving,” Rian said with a shrug.

Alex rolled his eyes. “You’re always hungry, bro,” he said, leaning over and giving Rian a friendly tap to the stomach.

Rian shoved him and snorted “Like you can talk, fatty.”

Alex’s arms instantly came in front of his stomach “Shut up.”

“Ooooh, hit a sore spot have I, Gaskarth?” Rian teased, poking him.

Alex was about to defend himself before Zack appeared out of nowhere and gave Rian a solid shove. “Knock it off, Robert. You know he’s sensitive.”

“Dude, you did not just ‘Robert’ me,” Rian scowled.

Zack ignored him. “Come on, let’s get out of here.”

“Where are we meeting the others?” Alex asked Rian as the three boys walked out the school gates.

“Some diner in the city,” Rian said, phone out and texting furiously “Oh, hey, I texted you on Saturday night; awesome party at Sean’s. Didn’t you get it?”

“Uh, no. Phone’s broken. Long story,” Alex replied awkwardly. Of course, Alex thought- his phone was broken. Maybe Jack had been trying to get in touch with him, after all.

Rian eyed him suspiciously, but didn’t say anything.

“Hey, what happened with the guitarist you were telling us about?” Zack asked, as he and Alex followed Rian through the city.

Alex could’ve sworn that the universe was out to remind him of his humiliation today.

“I don’t think it’s gonna happen, guys. Sorry,” he said quietly, looking down at his feet.

Rian frowned. “Why, what did you do?”

Alex blushed, not making eye contact. “Nothing. Fuck, why does it have to be my fault? He’s just not in to it.”

Rian shrugged and just kept walking. “Whatever, I knew it was too good to be true.”

Zack grabbed Alex’s arm, holding him back as Rian walked ahead. “Hey, what really happened?”

Alex tried to play dumb. “What? Nothing.”

“Bullshit, Alex. You’ve been sulking all day and none of us heard from you all weekend. What happened? I thought you were hanging out with that guy on Friday night.”

“Yeah…” Alex began, shoving his hands in the pockets of his blazer “We did. I… I kinda fucking kissed him, Zack.”

Zack just nodded. “He didn’t go for it, then?”

Alex laughed dryly. “He just… ran. I thought he was keen, but obviously not.”

Zack sighed and gave Alex a friendly pat on the shoulder. “Don’t worry about it, man. You’ll find the right guy.”

Alex raised an eyebrow. “Bro, until 5 minutes ago, you thought I was still into chicks. What gives?”

Zack shrugged. “I don’t care. You’re still my friend.”

Alex smiled, in spite of how shitty he was feeling. “Thanks, Zack. Means a lot.”

“Anytime,” Zack said and the two continued walking.

After a few minutes of silence, Zack spoke again. “But seriously, dude, did you have to make out with the only decent guitarist you’ve found?”

Alex could hear the teasing tone in his voice and couldn’t help but laugh. “You know what, I kind of did.”

“Fucking hurry up, assholes,” Rian called back to them. They were outside the diner now and Alex felt his stomach turn as he realized it was the same one he’d seen Jack in. Not that much of a surprise; there weren’t that many diners in Baltimore city.

He followed Rian and Zack in and they made their way over to a table where 4 other guys were sitting.

The usual greetings were exchanged, with a few too many cuss words thrown in and the three boys settled at the table.

Inevitably, the conversation soon turned to Sean’s party, which it turned out everyone except for Alex had attended.

“Oh, man! Did you see that Nat chick on Saturday?” Pete exclaimed with a laugh “She was so wasted.”

Alex zoned out and let the conversation wash over him. He gazed absently around the diner, taking in its other occupants. Short, ugly woman who looked like a bulldog and happened to own the diner, crazy old man that hung out in the park, red headed busker lady, blonde waitress who was talking to Jack, school kids…

Wait, Jack?

Alex squinted and stared intently at the boy. It didn’t matter how hard he squinted, or what angle he tilted his head to, it was definitely him.

He was right; the universe was definitely trying to rub it in his face.

He decided there was only one course of action left to take; to talk to him.

“Back in a sec,” he mumbled, standing up and making his way over to where Jack was standing awkwardly as the waitress chatted away at him.

“Hey, Jack,” he said quietly, causing Jack’s head to snap up to see Alex standing there.

“Hi.”

“Can we talk?” Alex asked awkwardly, giving the waitress a pointed look.

She rolled her eyes and walked off.

“Yeah?” Jack asked, wiping down the counter and refusing to look at Alex.

“My phone’s broken,” Alex blurted out “So, if you’ve tried to call…”

“I haven’t,” Jack replied bluntly, still not meeting Alex’s eye.

Alex blushed, completely humiliated. “Sorry,” he said, unsure of how else to approach the situation.

Jack looked up and Alex could’ve sworn he looked a little hurt. “It’s fine.”

“It’s not,” Alex said, shaking his head “I thought you… never mind. But, can we… you know, still hang out?”

Jack was silent for a minute. “I don’t think so, Alex. Sorry.”

He turned and walked back out into the kitchen.

“Fuck,” Alex swore under his breath as he went and sat down with the others again.

Zack raised an eyebrow at him and Alex just shrugged. “Bathroom.”

The conversation had turned to guitars and music more generally, and Alex eagerly joined in, trying to block Jack out of his mind.

That didn’t last long. He reappeared soon after he left, and began clearing tables. One happened to be right next to where Alex and his friends were sitting.

“Watch out, freak,” Sean said with a smirk, when Jack tripped over his foot, which Alex suspected was intentional on Sean’s part.

Alex felt himself tense up, which only worsened as Jack muttered “Sorry,” and blushed scarlet.

Everyone but Zack and Alex laughed, which prompted Sean to continue. “I thought only girls waitressed. ‘spose you’re not far off, are you fag?”

“Sean, shut the fuck up,” Alex spat, not even considering the consequences once the ‘f word’ had left Sean’s mouth. He’d known his friends could be idiots, but he’d never really picked them to be cruel; especially not to a complete stranger.

All eyes turned to Alex, and he felt Zack tense up next to him.

“Gaskarth, what the fuck are you doing sticking up for this loser?” Sean asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Because you all need to grow the fuck up. You’re seniors, not fucking freshmen,” Zack said, rolling his eyes “Didn’t picking on waiters get old years ago?”

Alex felt a massive rush of gratitude towards Zack. He saw Jack begin to leave, taking off his apron as he walked.

“Jack, wait,” he called out, causing the taller boy to stop in his tracks.

Rian frowned. “Ja- are you serious, Gaskarth? This pansy is the guy you want to play guitar in the band?”

Alex ignored Rian and stood up, grabbing his bag. “I’ll see you guys at school.”