Almost Easy

** ZACKY VENGEANCE POV**

I've been sitting in the studio for the past six hours trying to get this guitar track for the song finished. I'm trying to perfect this as much as possible. Ever since she left...I've changed. I don't hang around with the guys as much as I used to. I fucked up. I just wish someone would believe me. That night, I didn't kiss Gena. She basically mouth raped me. I may have been drunk, but I still remember, and drunk or not, I would have never done anything to hurt Lexus. I love her.


(Flashback)
I was walking around Matt's house trying to make my way through the sea of people. I recently saw Gena, so I've been trying my best to avoid her. She's been calling me lately, but I always just ignore them. I decided to sneak myself upstairs seeing as it was hot and girls were practically trying to rape me from left to right. I wish Lex was here, I want for all these other girls here to see my beautiful girlfriend, so they'll stay away from me.

I was roaming the upstairs and I walked into a hall to be pushed into the wall by someone. I was a bit tipsy so I was slow to react, until I felt someone's lips on mine. These were not Lexus's lips. Gena was trying to stick her tongue down my throat.

"Oh my gosh...." I heard a soft familiar voice. It was Lexus. No...no no no please no. I turned to see the love of my life, on the verge of tears. This can not be happening.

Lexus.." I muttered as I tried walking towards her, reaching out to her. I got close to her, looked her in the eyes and said, "It isn't what it looks like, I swear. I love you Lex! "

I'm praying to god right now that she can't smell the alcohol on my breath. I really am not that drunk, I've only had a couple drinks, but this situation was enough to instantly sober me up.

"Oh really? Tell her how you were all over me this whole time Zack, how you kept on telling me to get back with you." Gena spoke at Lexus with a disgusting smirk on her face, that fucking bitch. I looked over at Lexus pleading at her to not believe Gena. I saw a tear slide down Lexus's beautiful pale cheeks.

"Oh the poor little girl is crying, maybe you should have listened to your daddy after all." Gena spat at Lexus.

"Don't listen to her baby, you know I love you! She came onto me, I swear." I said and it came out in somewhat of a slur, but I was trying my hardest. She has to believe me...I can't loose her. Not now, not ever.

"GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF ME!" Lexus screamed at me as she pushed me back.

"What the hell is going on here?" I saw Brian yell from behind Lexus. Oh no, this could not get any worse. He looked over at me, then at Gena, then Lexus, then back at me with a look that could kill.

"You son of a bitch!" He yelled as he ran towards me and punched me in the face knocking me down to the floor. My head was pounding and I tried to get up, but Brian just kicked me in the stomach, making me unable to get up. I looked over to see that Lexus was running away. No..she can't leave me here alone. I have to talk to her, I have to make things right. I love her too much to let her go.

"Want me to help you baby?" Gena told me as she tried to help me off.

"Don't touch me you stupid bitch! This is all your fault! Why the hell did you lie to her? Why couldn't you just leave me alone? I hate you Gena Pauhlus and I never want anything to do with you, and I swear if you even try to come near me or Lexus again, I will file a restraining order against you. Leave, now." I hate this woman, I hate her more than anything now.

"FINE! After all that I've done for you, this is how you wanna end it? Fine, just don't come crawling back to me when that whore of yours won't take you back." She told me like she was the fucking queen of England.

"What you've done for me?!?! What the fuck have you ever done to me, but take my money and cheat one me? You're worthless." I spat at her. She kicked me, in the same place that Brian kicked me, but she didn't do it as hard. She then went walking downstairs while purposely bumping into Matt as he and the rest of the guys came upstairs to help me.

"Zacky what the fuck did you do this time?" Matt told me with worry as he helped me stand up.

"I did absolutely nothing, Matt. Listen I'll talk to you later." I said as I walked downstairs I heard Matt answer his phone and say, "What sup Brian?....Alright man, we'll be right there." I didn't get to hear anything else because I walked out of the house and drove home.

I stayed in my house, thinking. Why did this have to happen? Things were so perfect. Then Gena had to come and ruin everything. I need to talk to Lexus. I can't let things end. I told her we would be forever, and I didn't lie. We will be forever. I love her. I need her in my life.

I got lost in my own thoughts, for a really long time. It must have been hours, I didn't even know what time it was. Then I heard my front door open, and then be slammed shut. I then saw a very pissed off looking Heather, who also looked like she had been crying barge into my living room.

"What the hell?!" I told her.

"YOU, are a fucking dead man!" She said as she basically attacked me. I stopped her, since I am much stronger then she is, and held her against the wall so she couldn't hit me anymore.

"What did I do!?" I questioned her. I know Lexus saw me kiss Gena, but she doesn't even know the full story.

"YOU ARE THE REASON THAT LEXUS RAN AWAY. BECAUSE YOUR AN ASS, AND HAD TO GO KISS YOUR EX GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE YOU WERE 'TOO DRUNK!' " She yelled putting the too drunk in quotation marks using her fingers.

I let go of her instantly.

"She's-She's gone?" I stuttered. No, she wouldn't do that. I was on the verge of tears, a grown man, on the verge of tears, yeah I'm fucking pathetic.

"YEAH SHES FUCKING GONE, BECAUSE YOUR A FUCKING ASSHOLE"

"I've been trying to get a hold of her.. That explains why she won't answer.. Where is she?" I told her desperately. I have to find her, I don't care where she is, I'll get a plane and get to her as fast as possible.

"If I fucking knew why would I come here?!" She asked, "But. you are a fucking dead man" She said jumping on me again trying to punch me.

"GET. OFF. OF. ME." I said throwing her off me and pinning her to the ground. I don't need this right now.

I picked her up and threw her out of my house. I heard her bang on the door a couple more times, but I just ignored it, it later stopped and I assumed she had left.

I sat back down, and tears starting falling down my cheeks. The one person I ever cared about, the one person I ever truly loved in my lifetime is gone, and its all my fault. I wanted us to last forever, I wanted us to get married and have children together. I fucked up. It's all my fault. I've lost her. I grabbed the bottle of JD that was on one of my cabinets and drowned my shame in alcohol. This went on, for a very long time

3 years later. I've been living, but drowning. I don't sleep, I don't eat, I don't live anymore. I don't think I ever will be able to live without her. The only thing that keeps me going are my fans..I do this for them. I'm still here because of them. I live in the studio, all because of them, and in hope, that maybe, I'll see the girl that I love once again.

For the past 3 years, Heather does not talk to me, only sends me death glares when she has the chance and she tries to avoid me as much as possible. The other guys, except for Brian, have somewhat forgive me after I told them the whole story. Brian of course it being his daughter, still hates me, but works with me for the sake of the band. Heather, does not believe me when I tell her what really happened. I see how it hurts her to loose her best friend, but she has no idea how much its killing me.

She was currently messing around with Jimmy in the other room, so I went towards them and coughed from the doorway to get their attention.

"Heather, can we please talk?"

"Fine sure. talk"

"Well, I just want you to know I'm sorry. And I was hoping you would forgive me."

"No. I won't forgive you, I won't forgive you until the day she comes back. And even after that I probably wont forgive you, just for the sole fact that you are the reason that she left in the first place. Do you realize how shitty I feel? How depressed I am, and Will be until i see her again? She was my best friend, my fucking sister! and You fucking ran her away with what you did. How can I ever forget and forgive you for that?"

"How do you think i feel?! I fucking loved her and i fucked up so badly! I didn't mean to hurt her that way! I want her back. I want her in my arms. I need her. I need her more than i need air!" I screamed at her. She has no idea, how hard this has been on me. She's just too damn stubborn to understand the truth!

"Fuck you. If you needed her so much you wouldn't of done what you did" She said as she walked out of the room leaving me alone.

I fell on my knees and put my hands on my head. Three years, filled with shame and suffering. I wish I could take this all back. Everyone deserves a second chance, and I believe that I will see her again. Our bond was too strong, I know love will find its way. I just wish it would hurry up, because I can't take this any longer.