The Girl Who Couldn't Feel

Tammy’s POV
“Oh no no no no NO.” I said through tears as I drove through the rainy streets. NOT AGAIN. Not her. Please God, not her. Anyone but her.

Why did nothing ever work out? Why wouldn’t we just live peacefully? What had we done to deserve this? What had Marie done? What had Jaden done? What had I done?!

I snapped out of my thoughts to see that I had reached the entrance of the hospital. I ran to the nurse at the table in front of me. I was in the ER.

“Marie… Marie Grace.” I said to the nurse in a rushed tone.

“Umm.” She said calmly.

“I SAID MARIE GRACE!” I yelled.

“Tammy!” Someone called my name and I turned. It was Jaden. His face looked so drained. He looked so unusually pale. “Sh-She’s over here.” He said as I ran to him. He led me to a room. It was a small white room with a white bed and a heart monitor as well as an IV. In the bed, Marie appeared to be asleep. However, her head was wrapped up with bandages and she had minor scrapes and bruises on her body.

I felt another round of tears falling down my face. I walked up to her slowly, hesitantly. I lifted my arm to touch her, and it was shaking. Finally, my hand touched her cheek and I was just relieved that it was a bit warm. She looked so still that it was frightening. Words were not coming to me. I turned to Jaden, but he just stood at the door, looking down. When he looked up, his eyes were glistening.

“J-J-Jaden.” I said as my voice cracked. “M-Marie?”

“We were just walking down the road, and she just… I didn’t see her. I saw her too late. I didn’t realize she was crossing. I just… The cars were coming, I tried to get her out of the way, but she fell...” Jaden said rapidly.

I swallowed. “Her parents.”

“I called them too.” Jaden said. “I had to.”

“I know.” I said as I went to stand by him. I had to stay strong.

“The doctors are still doing tests. Th-They’re not sure yet...”

We were quiet. After a while, we took a seat next to Marie and sat silently. Finally I asked him the question I had been dreading to ask. “Wh-“ I cleared my throat. “What road were you on.”

I knew the answer, but I hoped I didn’t. I really hoped I was wrong. It couldn’t be that road. No it couldn’t be- “Scott Road.”

It was.

1 week later… Marie’s POV

I opened my eyes slowly only to find that the whiteness of the room still sickened me. I absolutely hated hospitals. Thankfully, however, I would be leaving in a little bit. I got up, smiling, and quickly got ready. My nap had really helped me get rid of some time. Then, the nurse came in.

“Marie, someone has come to pick you up. Are you ready?” she said with a smile, but my smile had fallen as soon as she had walked into the room. I don’t like people, especially not nurses.

All the forms and other things that had needed to be filled out for my departure had already been taken care of yesterday. It was such a hassle to fill out so many forms. There was still a bandage on my forehead, but the cut was healing quite quickly.

I left my room and headed to the waiting room, when I saw Tammy. I smiled at her and for a moment, she didn’t move. For some reason she was shocked. She ran to me and I hugged her.

“I’m so glad you’re alright.” She laughed.

“Hey, you think a couple of scratches are going to kill me? Have some faith.” I laughed.

We headed toward the exit and I asked her about what we were going to do.

I had been very aware of the guy who was following from behind me. When I was sure he was following us, I turned around and held a pocket knife to his throat, which I had “borrowed” from some kid who apparently got it as a Christmas gift. I can’t believe they got him that. The blade wasn’t large, but it was sharp.

The guy in front of me was taller than eyes. His blue eyes appeared confused and his hair was pitch black. I had no doubt he was stronger than me, but he didn’t look like much of a fighter.

“Marie!” Tammy screamed. “What are you doing?”

“What do you want? Huh?” I said to him, filling my eyes with anger. Tammy finally pushed the knife away and came in front of him.

“Marie?” Tammy said slowly, confused. “You… You don’t recognize him?”

“No.” I replied, slightly confused myself. I tried very hard to recognize him, but nothing was coming up. All that the thinking was doing was giving me a head ache.

“Marie, it’s Jaden.” Jaden said as he went around Tammy and took a step towards me. When he tried to put his hand on my shoulder, I pushed it away.

“Don’t touch me. If you try to touch me again I WILL hurt you.” I said with ferocity. I didn’t like people I didn’t know or trust so close to me. I didn’t get what was going on, but the guy in front of me looked kind of sad.

“Marie, what’s the last thing… you remember.” Tammy said to me.

I thought about my most recent memory, and immediately I saw the problem. I knew my age and the year, as well as my grade level, but I couldn’t remember anything. It was all blank after about 7th grade. “7th grade. Maybe earlier.” I muttered. I hadn’t realized, and I didn’t like saying anything in front of this stranger.

“I’ll catch up with you guys later.” Jaden said after a pause. He began walking away and didn’t stop even when Tammy called him.

“I didn’t like him.” I growled once he was gone.

“Marie…” Tammy said. She tried to pat my shoulder, but I pushed her hand away. I was surprised that she was even trying to touch me. She knew I didn’t like it. She looked a bit surprised herself, but she shook herself out of it. “Why don’t we just head home… Do you mind walking?”

“No.” I replied simply. She seemed different. Kinder, maybe. But, I guess my memory wasn’t something I shouldn’t be going off by. I had been smiling earlier today, but now I was just confused. I didn’t know her anymore. She looked and talked different. I mean, I expected it, but not really.

We walked outside, only to find that it was pretty dark and freezing. “You’d think I’d be used to this weather.” I said as I shivered a bit.

“I don’t blame you. It’s a lot chillier than it has been for quite some time.” Tammy said as she smiled and I smiled back at her. She looked a bit shocked again.

“Why do you keep doing that.” I muttered.

“What?” she asked, confused.

“You keep looking all shocked.”

“Oh… That’s because…” She said, looking away. “You haven’t smiled so much in a long time.”

“Oh no… I became a bore?” I said a bit depressed. I rarely smiled? Even less than now? Wow, I really must have been a weirdo.

“No, you were… you are not a bore.” Tammy managed to say.

The rest of our walk was pretty silent. However, when we walked passed an alley, and I saw some people surrounding someone or something in a circle. I tried to walk past, but I couldn’t. I glanced at Tammy, who was sure to get pissed, and then the alley. “Aww, man.” I groaned as I ran towards the alley on the opposite side of the street. I heard Tammy call my name, but that just made me run faster. The light before had just turned green, so cars sped by as soon as I ran across. That would give me some time. I walked up to the group slowly, and they didn’t turn till I was pretty close.

I finally saw who they were surrounding. It was just two little middle schoolers, who really shouldn’t have been out this late. One was practically in tears, while the other looked at the bullies angrily. I could tell these “bullies” were my age if not younger. “Tsk, tsk, tsk.” I smiled at the bunch as they looked at me, surprised. “Weren’t you guys ever told to pick on kids your OWN size.” Several of them sneered. “How about this,” I said as I got close to the closest one. “How about you let them go, and I play with you instead.” My smile was dark, but the only person who could tell was the one who’s face I was next to, and I don’t think he had regained the ability to speak.

They laughed and let the kids go, but the kids kept looking at me. I walked through the snickering group of idiots and approached them. “Don’t worry about me. I can take care of myself, but you guys should get going. Alright?” I said as kindly as I could. I patted their heads and after a few more seconds they finally moved to leave. I watched them turn the corner and then turned around. “Now, who’s first.” I said as I cracked my knuckles.

“MARIE!” Tammy yelled at me from a few feet away as I was beating the last guy’s head into the wall. All of them were groaning, but not for the same reasons. I could tell the one whose face I still held in my hand was the leader, so I kept smashing his face into the concrete. This would teach him, and in turn all of them, a lesson. Tammy finally pulled me apart from the guy as quickly as she could.

“What are you trying to do? Kill him?” She yelled at me. I looked at my hands and clothes, which were splattered with blood. That should affect me. The fact that I had the blood of these people on me, but it didn’t. I didn’t care the slightest bit. I didn’t care that I could have killed him.

“If need be, yes.” I said, looking into her eyes. I saw the one thing that I always dreaded seeing. I saw fear. She was afraid, afraid of me. There was no expression on my face, and to be honest I didn’t really feel anything. I looked at the guy passed out on the ground, he nose was bleeding profusely. It was definitely broken. Of course that’s not the only place blood was coming out of. “So what if I did kill him.” I said honestly. He deserved it for what he did, for what I’m sure he had done several times before.

I looked back at Tammy and then I felt Tammy’s hand hit my face. It stung, but I didn’t stop her or dodge it. I did not even move my face to look at her after she hit me. “Don’t you EVER DARE to say something like that again. It’s not RIGHT.” She yelled.

I didn’t say anything for a moment. “My actions are not right. My thinking is not right… I’M not right.” I said, and finally I looked at her.

“That’s… That’s not what I said.” She mumbled, but I just sighed.

“Let’s just get home.” I stuck my hands into my sweater pocket and proceeded back to where I’d come from, stepping over the guys on the ground. Several of them could walk but were too scared to get up while I was there. That was smart of them. I was not someone they should mess with. I think I lacked something in my head that prevented others from hurting or killing people. I could do it and not even regret it. Tammy was right. I was not normal, and though I had always known that, it felt weird to admit to myself. If the walk had been silent before, it was even worse now.

We were almost home, but instead of turning onto her street, Tammy started crossing the road to head straight. “Wait! Tammy. Your house is over here.” I smiled as I pointed.

“I was thinking of dropping you off first.” She said as she pointed in the direction of my house.

“I know the way home. Don’t worry. I’ll walk you to your house and then walk home myself.” I said, and she finally agreed. When we made it to her house, I stopped on the sidewalk. Tammy noticed and turned to look at me.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“Nothing… It’s just that I’m pretty sure that your dad would not appreciate me coming in. He has never really found me agreeable. I really don’t want him to make good on his promise and really get a restraining order.”

Tammy kind of rubbed her head. “Actually, he’s fine with you… now.” She mumbled and I felt a hint of sadness. That’s not what I remembered. Is this how it was going to be from now on? All the relationships I thought I had were different now. All of them.

“I… think it’s best if I don’t, Tammy.” I said to her without smiling. She nodded a bit and said bye before running to her door. Once her mom opened it, I left.

There’s peacefulness to walking alone. The whole world was quiet, except for the crickets. This was the one thing that hadn’t changed. The crickets and this calmness I felt from walking at night. This was still the same, even if I was not.

I reached my house and pulled out a key that Tammy had given me earlier. The house was silent and dark, so I assumed that the rest of my family was fast asleep. I went to my room and jumped onto my bed. In the dark, this place felt familiar as well.

It wasn’t until a couple hours later that I heard the door of my room I opened. I immediately jumped up in bed, only to find it was the guy from earlier at the hospital.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!” I yelled quite loudly. The guy was shocked at first but then he smiled.

“Oops. I forgot to tell you. I’m Jaden.” He said as he put his hand out for me to shake, but I didn’t make a move to shake it. Suddenly, he grabbed my hand and I pulled away too late. I became tense for a moment, but he just kissed. “Ahh. I forgot to tell you the most important part, Princess, I also happen to be your roommate.”

I pulled my hand away quickly, and I felt my body heat rise from my anger as I stood up and pushed him away. “Yeah right. Sorry, but you’re going to have to try that on someone else.” I growled at him angrily. He really pissed me off.

Jaden just smiled. “I’m not kidding. My stuff is right over there.” He said, pointing to the side. I took a look and noticed for the first time that there was a bed set up as well as clothes and other things.

“Well, sorry , this is not going to happen.” I growled and then sighed. What could I do? Suddenly, I remembered Tammy. I could stay at her house for a couple days, right? “I’ll be leaving.” I said as I grabbed my sweater. I was about to walk around him, and the next thing I knew I was pinned backwards on my bed. He had grabbed both of my wrists. I struggled a bit and immediately new this wasn’t easy.

“You’re not going anywhere when you just got back.” He muttered. Then, he moved closer. “Now, why does this seem familiar?” He said as he laughed quietly. I had moved one of his arms closer to me. I took the opportunity to bit his arm as hard as I could. That would leave a mark. “Ow.” He growled as he let go of me. It gave me just enough room to lift my leg up, so I did that and kicked him in the stomach, which sent him flying backwards. He tripped over my sweater, which had fallen to the ground earlier, and fell.

I stood up and stuck out my hand. He grabbed it and I pulled him up, but then I pushed him to the wall, hard. “I don’t know who you think you are, but don’t ever pull something like that again.”

“Alright, Princess.” Jaden said. “BUT only if you stay.” I looked at him and then looked away for a minute. I didn’t get what he was thinking at all. “You shouldn’t mess with me either.” He smiled as he lifted my chin. I pushed his hand away and turned around.

“Whatever. I’m going to bed.” I sighed as I went back under my covers. The one thing I was sure of is that he wouldn’t do anything again. I had a feeling I could trust him, and I survived my depending on my instincts. If he tried anything, though, I would beat him to a pulp and Tammy wouldn’t be here to stop me.

I smiled at the thought. I hoped, for his sake, that he didn’t touch me.

It would be the end of him, and I didn’t think I’d mind.