Death is Black and White

"Please, Samantha!" I whisper desperately. If anyone but her hears this, she could get fired and I an extra hour of therapy. 

"I told you no! I'm not sneaking you out or her in." 

Damn, I thought she was cool. Guess not. "And I told you that I need this desperately. If I schedule a visit, she can only stay for a half hour and under close watch. And this is really private." 

"You're not supposed to be keeping secrets here, Lydia," Samantha says. 

"And we're not supposed to be having this conversation. Now could you just sneak me out?" 

"You'll freeze outside. There's no way I'm risking my job and your health for this." 

I laugh dryly. "Bullshit, my health. I'm already insane, seeing this fucking ghost." 

I stop short. Did I say that out loud? By the look on Samantha's face, that'd be a yes. I sigh and look around the hall to see if anyone heard me, but we're alone. "Follow me," I sigh. 

When we get into my room, I shut the door and take out my almost dried out sharpie from under my pillow. "Don't tell me you haven't noticed these," I gesture at all the doodles of Lotty on my wall depicting every murder Lotty had committed. 

"This," I point the sharpie at a single drawing of Lotty's face; the left portion of it looking completely normal and the right twisted and bloody, "is Lotty. She died at the turn of the nineteenth century on her ninth birthday." I point to the window where I drew my first scene. "A group if kids drowned her." 

A look of horror grows on the nurse's face. I want to laugh. 

"That's not even the worst part." I jump off the bed and walk over to a dark drawing of a little girl standing over the body of a boy. She's holding a large rock above his head, about to strike. "When Lotty was seven, she killed her brother. They were poor, lived in a cramped house on the countryside and he thought he could make a quick buck by betting with his friend that he could scare his little sister until she cried. But Lotty's not afraid of anything.

"In this one, Lotty buried a girl alive. That one she set the house on fire, killing a family of four, including a toddler. Slit this kid's throat and threw him in ditch. Smothered this one with a pillow, and she was fifteen years old. Lotty was Ruthless. Still is."

Samantha stares at the drawings, horrified. "How do you know all this?" 

I look at the drawing of the house on fire. "I think she's feeding me the memories. She knows that I've figured out her past and now I'm guessing she's making it clear that I'm right. I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night, grab the sharpie and draw. It's not until I'm done that all the details become clear. It's like reading a really sick book." 

"So they killed her because they found out she was a murderer?" 

I nod. "I know about every single murder she committed. But I don't know why she did it. and now she follows me everywhere." 

Samantha gasps, looking behind me and I turn around. Lotty giggles, standing before me innocently with her golden hair and pleated black dress. I back away. 

"Can you see her too?" I whisper without taking my eyes off of Lotty. 

"Mhmm..." Samantha's voice shakes. 

I uncap the sharpie and drop to the ground, drawing on the floor instead of the wall this time. In my head, a girl with bouncy blonde hair is walking down a brightly lit corridor with the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. She has black hair down to her waist that curls and twists like waves in the ocean. She wears brown boots and a blue skirt with a scarf around her neck. But her eyes are the saddest I've ever seen. Her mouth moves but I can't hear anything she's saying. 

The blonde puts a comforting hand on the girl's shoulder and they turn a corner. The blonde opens a door and follows the girl into another brightly lit room, which looks a lot like my hospital room. 

When she comes back out into the hall, Lotty is waiting for her. The blonde is tucking a pair of shiny scissors under her waistband, and by the time she notices Lotty, the scissors have already impaled her in the neck. Lotty smiles and puts her hands on the blonde's lower back, giving her a light shove that somehow sends her flying down the hallway. Then she smashes the second story window and falls to the ground with a sickening thud. And Lotty's laugh is like nails on a chalkboard...

I drop the sharpie and immediately draw in a quick breath. This drawing is different from the rest. I never get the details until the end, and this time I had the most vivid vision of them all. I quickly throw myself over the drawing so Samantha can't see it and look at Lotty. 

The ghost smiles at me and disappears, then i look at Samantha. She's white as a sheet, but still asks, "What just happened?" 

I shake my head. "You need to leave. You can't see it." 

"I think I have a right to see it, I've already seen Lotty!" she protests like a child. Then she adds, "That was Lotty, right?" 

I shake my head. "Just go. Something's wrong. Forget about sneaking me out and get out. Forget about everything."  

"But why?"  

"JUST GO!" I scream at her. "And don't you dare think I'm crazy. Don't send people to give me meds, don't bother me about this." 

She jumps back, startled by my scream. "Is that why you're here?" she asks, ignoring my warning. "Your parents think you're crazy because you can see ghosts?" 

"NO!" I yell. "Just...you should leave. I'm not the one who cut myself...well I guess technically I did; it was my own hand holding the knife. But Lotty possessed me and...whatever. But she's really dangerous so I think you should just go. I need to talk to Sam about this anyway. Forget about any of this." 

She shakes her head. "Fine. But I'm worried about you. Did you tell anyone about this?" 

"Samantha! Just GO!" I snap. 

She hurries out of the room, and I catch a glimpse of her blonde hair swinging behind her before she closes the door.