Regrets A Waste Of Time

When we got to my house after leaving David’s I thought that Zack was going to bust through my door and start throwing things in a fit of rage. I just don’t know what to do to calm him down. He’s pissed at so many things right now, mainly the fact that he can’t really do anything to help David. I know Zack feels lost and he gets angry when he doesn’t know how to make things perfect. There is no easy out to this one at all.
“Zacky, babe, you have got to calm down okay. If you don’t you are going to worry yourself into a panic attack and you know it,” I said softly trying to calm him down.
“This is all so stupid Liz you just don’t understand. I am so frustrated I just wish it would all go back to how it was before I knew anything about that stupid journal. I mean why would he even bring it to a party in the first place? That’s so stupid it doesn’t make since to me at all!” he ranted, before sitting with me on the couch.
"Zack listen to yourself. This is not David’s fault and you know it. He feels bad enough already cut the poor boy some slack please.”
“I know your right Liz I’m just so frustrated about this whole thing. You know there is someone from our school who has everything they need to make a complete ass out of me. I just want to know what I did to deserve this,” he said dejectedly.
“Don’t be like that. You know good and well that you haven’t done anything to deserve this and neither has David. I mean, think about how he feels right now. He thought you were coming over to kick his ass for having a crush on you. He is scared out of his mind. People are pissed at him Zack, like majorly pissed. What’s the worst thing that will happen to you?” I asked.
“I know your right Liz, this is just a lot to take in. I do feel horrible for what he is going through and what he will continue to go through. I truly wish I could stop it and that’s why I am so frustrated.” Zacky said with a sigh.
He then stood up and screamed at the top of his lungs. I knew he needed to get his frustrations out but I think there are much better ways than busting the eardrums of everyone within a ten minute radius.
“What the hell Zacky?” I yelled over him. “Come on stop being ridiculous get over it, there isn’t anything you can do to make this better right now so the least you can do is not worry so much about it.”
“I thought you were one of the people who manage the school blog can’t you just figure out who is doing this?” he asked.
“Zack you know if it was that simple I would of done it a week ago when this all started but it isn’t.
The blog is free space if you have a school account then you can get on the blog and post whatever you want and once it’s on the blog it’s on the blog. I would have to catch them while they were in the act of writing it and the chances of that happening are one in a million.” I said.
“I understand,” he said sadly.
Just as he sat back down there was frantic knocking at the door.
“What now?” he sighed.
“Don’t act like that Zack. We just talked about this,” I scolded him.
“Well if I can’t pout then you have to answer the door.” He said, getting up and going to the kitchen.
“Well at least you’ve gotten your appetite back!” I yelled after him.
I stood up from the couch and walked over to the door. As I got closer I heard sobbing. I ran straight to the door thinking it was David and there was another post up on the blog, but when I opened the door it was Alex, standing there sobbing his eyes out. He was barely breathing from sobbing so loud.
“Alex? What Happened?” I asked.
“It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. I didn’t mean for this to happen. Oh, God, what have I done?” he said in between his sobbing.
“Alex what the hell are you going on about?” I asked.
“Please, please don’t hate me, I honestly just wanted him to come out of his shell, I figured he needed a bigger push than me just telling him.” He sobbed out.
“Don’t tell me you’re the one who posted the...”
“What. The. Fuck. Did. You. Do?” Zack yelled coming back in from the kitchen.
“Zack.. I-I didn’t m-mean for it to go like this I swear to you. He was supposed to read the post and once he saw that everyone knew he was supposed to come tell you himself.” Alex stuttered out.
“Well that means that it stops right fucking now you stupid son of a bitch!” Zack yelled charging towards Alex.
I moved to stop Zack, but got there a second to late to stop Zack’s fist from colliding with Alex’s cheek.
“That’s it stop it right fucking now!” I yelled at them pulling Alex away from Zack’s menacing demeanor.
Zack backed away from Alex clearly fuming that Alex would do something like this to his best friend, and don’t get me wrong I am to but I just don’t understand what he is doing here telling us this now.
“So you’re going to stop posting now right? This is the end of all of this?” I asked incredulously.
“Well, the thing is, I don’t have the journal anymore,” Alex said slowly. As he said it he backed away from Zack.
“What the fuck do you mean you don’t have the journal anymore Alex?” Zack asked slowly.
“I didn’t even notice that it was gone you guys honestly I didn’t, but after you both left David’s he burst out crying, he had an email saying that someone new had the journal and they were going to expose the biggest secret of all. And I am telling you guys that if that happens it won’t just mess up a high school kid’s year, it will ruin lives, not just David’s either.” Alex said, as he started tearing up again.
“Well who’s fucking fault is that, huh Gaskarth?”Zack yelled.
“Mine I know that, I swear I was done though, that post yesterday was the last one I was going to put on the blog,” Alex said crying again. “This was never supposed to happen.”
“Well, it did so I think we can all agree on one thing,” I said, “We don’t, ever, under any circumstance, tell David about this.”
“I agree,” Zack said, “but, ONLY because it would kill David to know what a douche he had for a best friend.”
“Thank you,” Alex whispered.