Baby Doll

“Do you wanna come over to my place tonight?” Jason whispered in my ear before sliding his arms around my waist and kissing my cheek. I blushed and let my hair cover my face to hide it. It was about 6:00 and the café had closed an hour ago and I was in the kitchen cleaning ups sine the dishboy had to go home early. Luckily Jason had helped me. I’m not even sure if you could Oh La La! a café anymore though. In the two months since I’d left Matthew the café had turned into more of a restaurant. Miss Owen even talked about expanding it. Beside Oh La La! other things had occurred in my life as well. First I went back to the suite to grab all my stuff well at least all the stuff Matthew hadn’t bought me which made it so that all my stuff fit in a large duffel bag and a backpack. After that Ann pulled a few strings so I had a small apartment close to her. It was fun living on my own for the first time in my life but also terrifying. I discovered I was afraid of the dark but not because of boogie men, I was afraid that Matthew lurked in the shadows ready to drag me back to the living hell of my old life. I actually was close to having panic attacks over it. Jason had introduced me to a band called Spill Canvas and he bought me a few CD’s and I listened to them at night just so I could sleep. Or I sparingly spent the night at Jason’s house. It made me feel safe sprawled across Jason’s chest while he stroked my hair and sung horribly off key lullabies. I hated feeling weak but Matthew haunted my dreams. I would dream of him beating me to death nearly every night. When ever I woke up I’d find scratch marks on my skin from when I’d clawed at myself to get Mathew’s hands off me in my nightmares. That was yet another reason why I was seeing a psychiatrist twice a week. Dr. Bynes was helping me sort out my issues and helped me understand that when ever I blacked out it was probably panic attacks. It was my body’s way of coping and trying to keep me safe. I hadn’t told her about the incidents that had occurred from my “panic attacks” and I didn’t know if I ever would. Jason drug me from my thoughts by kissing me under my ear which tickled me.
“ Stop that Mr. Slade and no not tonight. I have a shift at IHop.” I said laughing as I turned around to kiss his lips. He pulled away first and pouted.
“But I want you to come home with meeee.” He whined and I laughed as I reached up and pulled him down to kiss me again. This time I pulled away first but I kept our foreheads pressed together.
“I have to pay my rent Jason.” I said and he sighed.
“Can’t you just live with Anna?”
“No I want to be independent. I hate it enough that I’m at your place all the time.” Jason pulled away to put a hand over his heart.
“That hurt.” He said dramatically.
“Aww. Jason don’t take it that way. I’ve just been depending on someone my whole life. I need time for me.”
“So you’ll just me for my gorgeous voice, my body and my cooking.” Jason sniffed and my smile slipped from my lips. I don’t know if I should even be basically dating Jason right now. As a mater of fact I really didn’t want to and even Dr. Bynes thought I should take a beak from men. But another part wanted him and how he made me feel.
“Oh man did I say something wrong Goldilocks? I didn’t mean that you where really using me or anything. I was just teasing.”
“I know but maybe we are moving too fast . . .” Jason kissed my forehead.
“As long as I get to see you or at least know your okay then I’m okay Goldilocks.” He whispered against my forehead and I smiled shyly.
“Thanks Jason and by the way your gorgeous voice cracks on every note.” I teased.
“Hey I cook and I clean. Sorry I can’t be perfect Miss Summers.” He said back. I laugh.
“It’s okay I still love when you sing to me.” Jason smiled.
“Wait one sec.” He darted into the locker room and I hoisted myself onto the counter. He came back out with his I pod and a small ipod duct. He flipped through his ipod until he found the song he wanted then he pulled me gently off the counter and wrapped an arm around my waist and interlaced our fingers with his other. My hand went to his chest as we swayed then twirled around the kitchen to Wish I Was Your Lover by Enrique Iglesias . It wasn’t the waltz I’d learned in elementary school but it was ten times better with him. I laid my head on his chest and savored the moment.
“I like Stephanie.” Jason said childishly but full of truth.
“I like you too Jason.” I said looking up into his emerald eyes that held everything I ever wanted and things I never even dared to wish for. His eyes held today, yesterday and in this moment my promise of forever.