Green and Gray

By the time I got around to finally getting back to reality and heading home, it was Monday morning. I spent all weekend with The Maine boys and more importantly, John. I didn't want to leave and John certainly didn't want me to leave, but I had to face reality and get back to work no matter how badly I wanted to just crawl back into John's bed and burrow myself in his warm blankets.

I had to leave early because I was due at work when it opened at ten, plus I had to go home and get ready, so I left the farm at six-thirty, much to my dismay and John's protests.

“Why do you have to leave?” John pouted from the bed while I slipped into a pair of jeans and my Wildfox pullover.

“Because I have to go to work like a normal person.” I sat down on the edge of his bed so I could put my socks on, “Not everyone can be a rockstar like you, Babe.” It was the first time the petname spilled from my lips and I wasn't sure how he was going to react. But when I felt his arms wrap themselves around my waist, his chin rest on my shoulder, and his hot breath on my neck, I knew he didn't mind.

“I'm not letting you go.” His low, raspy voice had my stomach doing flips and I almost willingly stayed, but I knew I had responsibilities to tend to.

“Is that right?”

I could practically feel the smirk on his lips as he pressed his face into my neck, “Yup.” The sound vibrated against my skin, causing goosebumps to form along my arms and thighs, “I'm going to kidnap you and head for a cabin in the hills where we can be alone and do whatever we want.” He placed his lips to my neck and I tilted my head so he could get better access. “Anything. We. Want.” He whispered out in a husky voice then began to trail kisses all the way up and down my neck.

It took all of my willpower to not let him continue what he was doing because god did it feel amazing. “John?”

“Hm?”

“As much as I love that scenario, I have to leave.”

He stopped working on my neck and sighed, “Fine.”

I got up and turned to face him. My arms instinctively went around his neck and his settled back around my waist, bringing our bodies closer together. “It's not like you're never going to see me again.” I stated, trying to cheer him up.

“I know, but I just got you. I don't want you to leave so soon after.”

I smiled sadly at him. He seemed genuinely upset that I had to leave and as much as I was feeling the same things he was, I had to be strong so I wouldn't cave and stay. “How about this, when do you guys get home?”

“Two and a half weeks or something.”

I frowned, “Well, when you get home, why don't you come over to my apartment and we can pretend like we're in that cabin up in the hills.”

His eyes lit up, making me smile, “I think you have yourself a deal.” He smiled then kissed me.

“Walk me out?” I asked.

“Of course.

The house was quiet due to the early hour, but the sun was half way up. It felt peaceful outside despite the slight windchill. The stillness of the morning always made me feel like there was no one else in the world. It had always been my favorite time of day.

John held my hand until he reluctantly let it go when I had to shut my door. I rolled the window down the second the engine was on and turned down the satellite radio. “Drive safely.” He said as he dunked down to be eye-level with me.

“I will.” I assured him, “I'll miss you.” I added.

He smiled softly, “I'll miss you,too, but that's why phones were invented.” I laughed half-heartedly. Suddenly, he swopped in and kissed me, startling me quite a bit. “I love you.” He said which caused a goofy smile to form across my lips.

“I love you, too.”

He smiled then patted my door twice where my window was rolled down, “Buckle up.” He said then took a few steps away from the car, so I could back up.

I gave him a look, but pulled the seatbelt over my lap and chest anyways. I released the emergency brake while pressing my foot on the brake then put the Jeep in reverse. “Go inside and get some sleep.”

He chuckled, “I will.”

I gave him one last smile before blowing him a kiss and taking my foot off the brake. I listened to The Maine the whole drive home.


At work, I was floating around to Florence + The Machine playing throughout the store and was in an all around good mood. Ronnie and Trisha were giving me weird looks and questioning glances, but I ignored them as I worked on new designs in my sketch book. When they finally confronted me about my sudden mood change, I just brushed them off without an explanation and went back to sketching. I had been so inspired since everything happened with Landon. I had needed something to occupy myself with and designing just happened to be what got me to stop thinking.

When Erika died, I had been told to take all of those emotions I was feeling and put them into something else. That something eventually turned into fashion. I never meant to fall so deeply in love with the fashion industry, but I couldn't help it when Mila started sending me her care packages. The clothes were just so pretty and amazingly crafted. Then Winter let me start working at the store. I'd been in love ever since.

I never flaunted my designs because that was Winter's thing. She was the fashion designer. I wouldn't try and steal that from her. I'd stick to being a connoisseur of sorts.

I had just got back from lunch when two familiar faces walked into the store.

“You work here?” Lauren asked with a huge smile when her and Callie noticed me at the front counter.

“My sister owns it.” I explained then walked out from around the counter to greet them properly.

“That's so cool! I wish I had a fashion designer for a sister.” Callie said before wee hugged.

I laughed, “How have you guys been?”

“I've been good, just busy with school.” Lauren said with her cute southern charm, “Not as good as you, though.” She winked and I grew confused immediately.

“What?”

“We heard about your adventure with JohnOh.” Callie mimed a pelvic thrust and my cheeks flamed.

I heard Ronnie gasp from behind the counter, “Sparrow L'Amour, you did not have sex with Hot Musician John!” Lauren and Callie started to bust up.

“Shh!” I yelled at Ronnie, embarrassed.

“Oh, wait until your sisters hear about this one.” She said, already on her cell phone.

I rolled my eyes, “Anyways!” I exclaimed, “News obviously travels fast in your group.”

They nodded, “I'm sure everyone in our group knows by now.”

I groaned, “Wonderful.”

“Don't worry; it'll be old news by the time the guys come home.” Lauren reassured me.

I guessed it made me feel a little better, but not completely. I kind of assumed everyone would find out, but not so soon.

“So, is there any particular reason why you decided to come shopping today?” I questioned as I busied myself with refolding a few graphic t-shirts on a shelf hanging on the wall by the window.

They both shrugged, “We're going out to see the guys this weekend and I kind of wanted a new sweater or something.” Callie said and I nodded.

“Well you're in luck! We just got in a shipment of Rebel Yell sweaters, and if that's a little overpriced, my sister has been manufacturing new designs like crazy since she's been on maternity leave.”

Their faces both softened and they let out “awes” as soon as they heard of my sister's condition, “Your sister's having a baby?” I nodded at Callie, “When is she due?” I chuckled, remembering the many texts she'd been sending me.

“Any day now.” They both “awed” again and I chuckled. Girls seemed to get sappy when they heard about a new baby.

“Sparrow,” I turned and saw Trisha sticking her head out of the back room, “another new shipment just arrived. You need to tell your sister to stop.”

I groaned as I rolled my eyes, “I have to go figure this out, so I'll talk to you later. If you need any help, just let one of us know.” I smiled at them which they returned.

“Thank you. It was nice seeing you again.” Lauren said and Callie nodded.

“Maybe we can all hang out one day.”

I nodded, “oh, definitely. Jared told me he gave you my number, Lauren, so call me or text me something.”

Once we said goodbye, I walked into the backroom and saw the three new boxes full of clothes we had no room for. In our storage room were piles of boxes that had yet to be unpacked and set out in the showroom.

“Your sister should be saving some of these designs for when she doesn't have the time to sit down and sketch because of the baby.”

I sighed at Ronnie's words but agreed anyways, “I'll talk to her about it.”


It was cold when I got off work at nine. I pulled my studded leather jacket closer to my body as I walked to my car. It had been a long day and I really wanted to go home and sleep, but it was too early for that. Plus, I was starving. I felt like I could eat a whole cow.

Since work got to be a little stressful once the new shipment arrived, I didn't get to check my phone. As I sat in my Jeep, feeling my body defrost from the warm air blowing out of the vents, I went through my new messages. I received a text from Winter at around four, saying “You have a lot of explaining to do.” I rolled my eyes and texted her back saying I would explain everything at the Tuesday lunch the following day.

I had a text from Ryder, complaining about how he hadn't seen me in forever, but I was going to wait to reply because I knew he wanted to do something that night, but I had no energy.

Surprisingly, I had a text from Sawyer, asking me the date of Clover's wedding, so I quickly texted her “April 3”

Last, but not least, there was a text from John. “I miss you, Beautiful.” I smiled then quickly went to my phone section and called him. As I waited for him to pick up, I turned down TV on the Radio blaring from my speakers.

“Hello, Ladybird.” He answered with a smile.

“Hi, Handsome.” I replied then pulled out into traffic.

“What are you doing?” He asked.

“I just got off work. I'm about to drive through In-n-Out then go home and grub. I will most likely end up passing out after that.”

He chuckled, “It sounds like you have a party ahead of you.”

I laughed, “A party in my stomach!” I loved how well we could play off of each other's sarcasm.

“You've been watching too much Yo Gabba Gabba. I snorted then switched lanes to turn into the In-n-Out parking lot. When I saw the line of the drive-thru, I groaned. “What?” John questioned.

“Fucking people always eating dinner at the same time.” I complained.

“That's usually what happens, Sparrow.” He laughed.

I sighed as I waited, leaning back into the seat, “Anyways, how was your day?” I asked, changing the subject.

“Mmm.” He let out, thinking, “It was very uneventful without you.”

I scrunched my nose at his cheesiness, but graciously accepted the butterflies in my stomach, “Aren't you charming.”

I could picture his smile on the other end, “Well, I do try.”

I smiled just as the line moved forward, “Give me a runthrough of your day; I need boring.” Given the stressful work day I had, I would take anything to get my mind of of it.

“Well, once you left, I went back to bed for a few hours then woke up missing you.” My smile widened, “I made some coffee, talked to Jared and Kennedy while we waited for Pat and Garrett to wake up, got on the computer to see how everyone is back at home, and did some writing. Had some lunch when everyone decided to wake up, had a pow wow about the new jams, worked on the new jams, recorded parts of the new jams, texted you, experimented with the recording set up. We made dinner, talked, then you called me.”

By the time he was done retelling his day, I was next in line to order, “Well it sounds like you had a nice day.”

“I guess. I just wish you didn't have to leave this morning.”

I frowned, “I wish I didn't either. Trust me when I say I would have rather been cuddled up to you this morning than dealing with the stress of work.” I sighed out of exhaustion.

“What happened at work?” Just as he questioned me, the car ahead of me pulled forward.

“Let me order then I'll tell you.” He agreed then waited for me to give the girl on the other side of the speaker my order. Once I pulled forward, I let out another very audible sigh, “Work was fine until after lunch. Winter has been getting all these different pieces made to sell, but the problem is that we're getting new shipments in quicker than they're selling.”

“”That's not good.” John muttered as I pulled up to the window.

“Hold on.” I said then exchanged my money for my burger and animal fries. When I got out onto the road again, I inhaled the scent of my waiting food. “God, that smells fucking delicious.” I said more to myself than anything, but John laughed anyway.

“Anyways,” I said as I maneuvered my way around Tempe, trying to get to my apartment, “So we have way too many boxes of unopened clothes than we know what to do with already and we're trying to fit new boxes in the storage room and trying to organize what we want to bring out next because we finally have room for new stuff. We finally found the oldest box of shit and get everything out and unwrapped, but when we go to steam the shirts, the steamer is broken. So we're trying to figure out what the fuck is wrong with the piece of shit, but nothing is working. All the while people are coming in and out of the store, trying to get us to help them. Of course we have to put the customer before anything else.” The more I talked, the faster the words fell from my lips. It was always a problem I had.

“Of course.” John agreed, telling me he was still listening.

“So everything in the back got thrown off to the side because a shit ton of people decided they wanted to come in at the same time even though we were slow all day. I was supposed to be off at six, but stayed until closing because we couldn't get the stupid fucking steamer to work.” I pulled my Jeep into my apartment complex's parking lot when I finished.

“So what did you guys do with the clothes?” John asked, sounding really interested.

“Shit, I left it all sitting in the back room. Fuck that.” I turned my engine off once I had my car in my parking stall in front of my apartment. With my phone cradled between my ear and shoulder, I grabbed my purse and hoisted it onto my shoulder then grabbed my in-n-out bag and cup of iced tea just as John's melodic laugh filled my ear. “What?” I asked in amusement. All of the tension that was trapped in my body escaped when he started talking.

“I don't think I've ever heard you cuss that much in a single conversation before.”

I laughed, shutting my door with my hip, “Well I cuss when I get worked up.”

“I cuss all the time.”

I laughed at his statement, “I know you do, Potty Mouth.” With one hand, I located my house key on my car keys and stuck it into the lock.

“I really do have the mouth of a sailor.”

I laughed again at his sudden revelation as I shut the door and flipped the light on. My heels pounded against my hardwood floor as I made my way into the kitchen where I set everything down on the counter. John was humming a melody in my ear causing me to smile softly, “What're you humming?”

He immediately stopped then cleared his throat, “It's a, uhm, new song.” He sounded nervous all of a sudden, like he didn't realize he was humming to begin with.

“It sounds nice.” I complimented as I extracted my burger and fries from the white bag.

“It's still a work in progress.”

I switched ears then, giving my right ear a break, “How many songs are you guys working on right now?” I picked up my food, fully intending on walking into my living room and kicking back, but that wasn't the case. The moment I turned around, my eyes focused on a person in my kitchen. I let out a small scream at the sight of my gay best friend sitting at my breakfast bar. “Jesus fucking Christ, Ryder. What the hell are you doing?” I spat as I gave him a dirty look and tried to get my heartbeat back to normal.

“Admiring my best friend.” I rolled my eyes and ignored him. Instead, I continued on to my living room.

“What's going on?” John asked quizzically.

I sighed, “Ryder decided he wanted to break into my house.”

He laughed, “He does that a lot, huh?”

“Sadly.”

“All right.” I looked up from my food to Ryder. He was standing at the edge of the couch with his hands on his hips, “It's Ryder time, so get off the phone.”

I let out an aggravated sigh, “If I don't get off the phone I'll never hear the end of it.”

“Damn right.” Ryder exclaimed firmly.

John, on the other hand, chuckled softly, “Okay, I guess I'll talk to you tomorrow, Ladybird.” I smiled at my nickname.

“Okay. Goodnight.”

“Sleep well, I love you.” My smile only widened.

“I love you, too.” I felt like I was floating on a cloud when I hung up the phone. It was surreal to think that just the week before, I wasn't even talking to John and now we were ending out phone calls with “I love you's”

“Who were you even talking to?”

My blissful moment was over and my serene expression was taken over with an annoyed one. “John.”

“Since when do you love John? Scratch that, since when are you talking to John again?” He settled into the spot next to me, waiting for gossip.

I looked back down at my food with a sigh. My dinner was getting cold, I was tired, and I wanted to be left alone. “Everything that happened the other day was a big misunderstanding.” I explained then bit into my burger, savoring in the taste.

“What do you mean? He had a girl in his bed.”

With a roll of my eyes, I swallowed, “She was a lesbian.”

“I'm still confused.” I stared at him. “What? You know I don't follow stories well!”

“Okay,” I breathed, “I went up to Skull Valley on Friday to see the guys because they're working on their new album. Some shit went down between John and I and I ran out the door, but he followed me and got into my car. He wasn't budging so I left with him,” He raised an eyebrow at me, “Yeah, dumb, I know, whatever. Anyways, it started raining, we ran out of gas, he tried to talk to me, I wouldn't listen, I ran out into the rain, he ran after me, the girl was a lesbian, he told me he loves me, I told him I love him, we had sex, woke up in the morning, and went home.” I said as if it was the most casual thing ever.

Ryder was nodding, trying to understand everything I had just rattled out. His eyes widened though when he realized just exactly what I said, “Wait! You guys had sex!? Where?! You were stranded!” I smirked, “Oh, ew! Gross! In your car?!” I laughed loudly at how grossed out he was. “I am never getting in your car again.”