Rhythm of Love

Nora’s Point of View

He finally fell asleep, after about a half hour of me singing anything in a soft lullaby tone. I held his rough, left hand in mine, and rubbing circles in his sweaty palm. Resting my head on his drooping shoulder, I tried but failed at imagining what could possibly be flying through his head at the moment. Alex’s only brother, and the only person in his family he was truly close to, was dying, and becoming weaker and weaker as the seconds ticked by. And today was Alex’s birthday, to top it all off! This definitely wasn’t what he wanted to wake up to: seeing his brother unconscious in a hospital bed. This can’t be happening… I denied, closing my eyes and trying to relax. Turning my head a bit, I breathed in the scent of his hair and became still.

“I would not be here tonight,” I sang in Alex’s ear, my voice muffled by his hair. “If I had to choose. It’s always the bigger things in life that seem to choose you. You can say what you want; believe what you will believe. But I’ll take what I want and see what I need to see.” Everything was beautiful.

My voice couldn’t have carried very far around the room, since my lips were in Alex’s hair. However, as I was finishing the song I could hear a very faint clapping sound from next to Alex and I. With a gasp, I bolted upright just in time to see the small grin placed gently on Eli’s lips and to see is pale fingers clapping quietly. As I watched him incredulously, I began to notice every detail that showed his weakening state from his paper skin and red, puffy eyes. Not to mention, the silence that erupted from us was deafening and unusual; I was so used to Eli’s booming voice and bubbly demeanor. The two of us stared at the other for what felt like ages, sitting in absolute silence, with Eli smiling at me and I remained with a shocked expression. Finally, the blonde boy spoke.

“I always loved your voice,” he stated, randomly. “That’s what first provoked me to talk to you; your voice gives off this feeling of openness even though you yourself can be a bit of a hermit.” He laughed at this, this unheard joke, and I furrowed my brow.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I questioned, trying to hold on to this airy atmosphere. Keep the death and sadness away.

He continued to laugh. “Oh, come on Nora! You can be such a hermit, barely talking to a lot of people and all that. Well, except us, of course; you seem to like our group just fine. But otherwise, you’re like an over-cautious…cat-lady.”

“‘Cat-lady’,” I grimaced at this nickname. “I don’t even really like cats. Can’t I be, like, a dog-woman or something?” He laughed again, but it was a broken sound. Like a sound from someone dying.

“Nah,” he said, his eyes locking with mine. “You can’t be a dog-woman; you got to keep my brother straight, keep an eye on him and make sure he’s happy.”

I blinked, and felt my heart beat furiously in my chest. My cheeks felt much warmer than before and the circles I had been drawing on Alex’s palm slowed its rhythm. Is this his dying wish? Is this what he wants me to do? No…No, he isn’t dying! It was only until Eli’s smile dropped from his ivory complexion that I felt the tears streaming down my cheeks and hitting Alex’s and my hands. Quickly, I lifted our entangled fingers and brushed them over my cheek while saying, “O-Of course I will! I want him to b-be… so happy! Forever! I promise you that!” The tears didn’t stop though, as hard as I tried to brush them away. Eli’s now somber expression changed a bit as he beckoned me over to him. I did as he wished, and soon found myself in his warm embrace while dodging tubes and needles and wires. The dying blonde stroked my hair while I cried out incoherent words.

At least, I thought they were inaudible.

“Just close your eyes and remember,” he muttered out part of the lyrics to the song. “Everything is beautiful.” I stared at him, my face probably blotchy pink from sobbing. He added, “I’ll always love you Nora, okay? And I’ll always be here no matter what.” He placed his hand on my chest, just above my heart.

A sniffle was what filled the silence afterward, as I placed my own hand on top of Eli’s. Grasping it ever so lightly, I removed it from my chest and placed it on my cheek; his hands were like ice on my warm skin. I whispered, “And I’ll always love you too, Eli.” I closed my eyes, holding his hand to my cheek before finally placing it on his own cheek, hoping to send my warmth to him. When I opened my eyes, Eli’s were closed and a smile decorated his lips again.

I knew this would probably be the last time I talked to him; a part of me denied it, but the other said that there was no way he’d be recovering from this. My mind flashed through every moment I had with him, all the good and the bad, even when he blew up at me only days before. And then I looked at him – really looked at him – and took in his every feature from the way his hair naturally fell across his brow, to the creases in his skin caused by his smile, to his already-forming laugh lines.

This boy, there will always be a special place in my heart for him. Forever.

“Hey Nora?” his voice was sudden after the silence and I cocked my head to the side, signifying for him to continue. “Would you mind…giving me some time with Alex? And waking him up?” His grin flashed again at his last question, and I chuckled while nodding, brushing away more tears so that Alex didn’t have to see them. My body felt heavy as I sat down in the seat next to the boy, and I gently pinched his cheek. When there was no response, I pursed my lips and pulled the flesh as far as I could before Alex let out a pained groan. His squinted eye glared at me for a moment, before peering around in confusion at where he was. I didn’t give him a chance to say anything.

“Mission accomplished!” I said, sending a wave toward Eli and making a beeline out the door before the tears could start up again.