Therapy

A week had passed a lot faster than the flight I took back home over the summer when I had decided to cut shit off. It was as if Alex had manipulated me in the past few days. All of a sudden I was happier again.

I was sitting on my window still watching my street and my neighbors on the next Friday while Alex was sound asleep in my bed. I hated to admit, but he was extremely cute all spread out, lightly snoring.

I had woken up an hour ago from his vibrating phone. The screen had indicated a new text message from him, and I had been tempted to open it; but nevertheless it wasn’t my phone, it wasn’t my message to read. I just missed him so much.

I closed my eyes and leaned my head back, remembering what Alex made me suffer through.

The past week was fun, a lot of fun actually. I hated it.

How could Alex just easily make me fall back under his charm? All the hard weeks I forced myself to just forget, floated back. Just. Like. That. It would be too easy for him to ask me to come back with him right now because it is too hard for me to resist and say no.

Last Sunday night Alex and I drove out to Hamburg to stay until Tuesday for some casual hanging out, tourist-ing and mainly shopping. We ended up talking a lot; mainly regular daily topics, but way too much about feelings; even though I tried to escape heart-to-hearts, Alex still managed to bring them up, leaving me to find a way to change the subject.

Flashback

“So do you have your eyes on anyone?” Alex smiled across the McDonald’s table.

“Do you?” I replied with the same smirk.

Why does he always bring it up somehow?

Alex smirked and looked at his burger before meeting my gaze, “Haven’t been with anyone really. Now spit it out.”

“Why?” I completely ignored his last sentence.

“I don’t know, at first I thought it was because I still like Lisa. But she moved on.”

"Nuh uh,” I raised my eyebrows.

“Yeah, his name is Mike. But honestly? It doesn’t really bother me. At first I thought I needed someone to get over her, but I think I have been over her the entire time.”

I gazed at him, “Hmm.”

“Lisa and I have been on and off for years, I just liked the person caring about me around me. But then you walked around and I didn’t need her anymore because to me you are all that.”

I smiled: “That’s what best friends are for.”

“Exactly now, what’s up in your love life?”

“Nothing is going on,” I looked down.

“You can’t get him out of your head.” Alex clearly stated.

I nodded, starring at the disgusting French fries.

“He feels the same, you know? He loves you too and-“

I closed my eyes as Jack’s face appeared on my mind. “I have to go use the bathroom.” I stood up and left to find the lady’s room. A tear escaped as soon as the stall door closed and I couldn’t help but stick my finger up my throat.

End

I hugged my torso close, trying to keep everything inside: I don’t need another break down now. Alex wouldn’t keep loose if he saw me as a wreck, he’d call everything off just to help me. I need to wait, be strong for one more week for him.

“What time is it?” Alex husky morning voice caught my attention.

“Uh-“ I grabbed the cell from the TV next to me, “Seven.”

“In the morning?” He asked, dead serious.

I laughed, “Yes.”

“Oh wow, why are you even up yet?”

I wasn’t sure how to answer, honest or lie? “You have a text message.” I decided on telling him only half, “the vibrations woke me up.”

Alex took out his phone and his relaxed expression stiffened immediately. His jaw clenched and caused him to angrily put his iPhone next to the bed.

“What did it say?” I asked curiously.

Alex didn’t respond, instead he ignored it and pouted a “Come baaack, pwwwease?” to me.

I smiled, “Give me a good reason, Gaskank.”

“You’re the perfect cuddle bud,” he smirked at me and I couldn’t help but melt and return to join him.

I lay facing Alex and cuddled my face into his neck. He smelled good even though we just woke up. His rough hands started to draw shapes in my back and with his sweet voice he was singing me back to a carefree world.