Soulmates

Sierra's POV
'' Yes ... More than anything ... ''

Brian's words kept playing in my head . I had no idea what was I supposed to do . I wanted to go , run behind him and hug him like I've never hugged anyone else before , to let him know that it was okay , that I knew we'd both screwed up things but together we could rebuild everything ...

But still my feet wouldn't move . I was frozen on my spot , probably due to the fact that I was scared of the way Brian would react to my presence . I was afraid of that monster that had jumped right through him that afternoon , that evil nature that had hurt me . And the hurt wasn't just physical but emotional as well ; Since he'd done it once , he would be able to do it again ... And again and again . All in all , I'd lost my trust to him . And trust is one of those things that are hard to earn , yet too easy to lose ...

So , I simply remained seated , receiving weird glances from everyone , even Jason ...

'' What are you looking at ? '' he asked in disbelief , and I furrowed my eyebrows as he continued ...

'' Go after him , Sierra ... '' he said strongly ...

'' I don't know about that , Jason ... Maybe he doesn't want me there ... Maybe he just wants to be left alone ... '' I muttered , and I heard him cursing silently ...

'' Sierra , he's practically begging you to go after him ... He doesn't want to be left alone , he doesn't need to be left alone , he needs YOU ! So go ... '' he said sternly , and I sighed ...

'' But wh- '' I tried speaking , but Jason wouldn't let me do that ...

'' But nothing . You go after him , right now . You and I , and everyone here know that's exactly what you want to do anyways ... '' he said , and I nodded , realizing that he somehow made sense . Regardless of what me and Brian would talk about , I didn't want him there on his own . He was definitely a person who was too easily manipulated by his emotions . As a result , he was fully capable of making the worst choices for himself .

I smiled faintly as I stood up and started leaving , heading towards the place Brian had probably gone ; Too damn far away from where we were all sitting . After walking for what seemed like miles , cursing slightly as I am not a very big fan of walking barefoot in the sand , I managed to somehow track Brian , or at least a human shadow that resembled him .

There was a huge rock on the beach , and the shadow was leaning heavily against it .However , as I got closer and saw smoke coming out of the shadows' mouth , I was positive that he was Brian . So I stepped closer ...

His head hung low , like before , and I wasn't even sure that he acknowledged my presence . I stood there , immediately feeling regret over my decision , and decided I should go back . The moment I turned , though , I heard his soft , weak voice ...

'' Don't go ... '' he said in almost a whisper , but we both knew I'd heard him . I turned around , and took a good look at him .

Well , he looked exactly the way he looked during the afternoon , except from his eyes ; they were really red , and slightly puffy , something that indicated he'd been crying . The moment our eyes connected though , he immediately casted his look down again . Those few seconds , though , were enough to make me forget about everything that had happened between us all this time , even for a little while .

I stepped closer , and simply reached for the cigarette that came out of his mouth . I took it in my mouth and tried taking a drag , but I immediately started coughing . I threw the cancer-stick away from us , and continued coughing , with Brian looking at me , both worried and somehow amused ...

'' You ... You really shouldn't smoke these ... '' I said in between coughs , and Brian faintly smiled as his weak voice asked ...

'' Why ? '' , and I shook my head ...

'' They are going to kill you one day ... '' I said , and he shrugged ...

'' So ? Many worse things happen ... And we reach the point where we wish we were already dead ... '' he said weakly , and I felt the tears pricking at my eyes ...

'' D-don't say that , okay ? '' I said weakly ...

'' It's the truth ... '' he replied simply , and I moved closer to him ...

'' No it's not ! It's absolutely not ! Do you remember what I'd told you ? That night , outside the bar ? '' I asked him , and slowly placed my hand on his chest . I could feel his hear beat getting quicker ...

'' I... I told you that ... That no matter what , don't you ever think of ending your life for anyone ... Because if you really are imp - '' I started saying , and , to my big surprise , Brian continued my phrase ...

'' Important to them , be sure that they would never want to see you go this way... '' he completed , and a smile formed on both of our lips ...

'' Y-ou ... You remember '' I said , still in shock , but also happy that I could see Brian smiling again ...

'' I remember everything ... Every single word you've said to me ... '' he smiled , and once again I shook my head ...

'' Maybe that's the bad thing ... '' I muttered , and saw Brian giving me a puzzled look ...

'' I mean ... Sometimes I say things I don't mean , just because I'm pissed or something .. I get all bitchy and mean to the people who mean so much to me , and I fail to see that I hurt them ... And then I start hating myself and everything within me , and I want to make things better , but then I think it's pointless , and then I - I ... end up disappointing everyone ... That's just my story ... '' I said in almost a whisper , and looked at Brian , who hadn't said a word ever since I'd started ranting on and on ...

'' And I mess up ... Constantly ... '' I whispered , and after getting no response from Brian , I
sighed once again ...

'' I - I think ... I think I should go now ... Just wanted to make sure you were okay ... '' I said quickly , and turned to leave . His voice stopped me , though ...

'' I'm never okay ... When I'm not with you ... '' he said weakly , and I turned towards him once again ...

'' Nothing's okay without you , Sierra ... My life f*cking vanishes ... It's like I breathe , but somehow the air kills me inside ... And I know you say things , and you do get bitchy and mean towards me , and you don't get that you are hurting me ... But believe me , you never , ever disappoint me ... You are not a mess ... You are never going to be one , because I'm going to be there for you ... And I will NEVER let you fall ... '' he finished as he crushed his thin lips on mine , his arms moving around me and securing me close to his body ...

I craved that kiss for so long . That moment it was just us on the beach , but it felt like millions of fireworks were lightening up the sky . We broke the kiss , but Brian still held me in his arms , even more strongly ...

'' Sierra ... I'm so s - '' he tried apologizing , but I cut him off ...

'' You don't have to , Brian ... R- '' I said , but he didn't stop ...

'' I have to ... I must . Sierra , I'm so sorry for hurting you . I'm sorry for ... for everything . I'm sorry for giving up on us , when you never did ... I'm sorry for not even calling you for a whole f*cking month ... I'm beyond sorry for everything that happened this afternoon ... '' he said desperately , and took a deep breath as we both sat down , behind that huge rock . He moved his fingers , and lightly caressed my face ...

'' I'm just ... sorry I failed you ... '' he said slowly , and I shook my head ...

'' You never failed me ... Not completely at least ... And I'm sorry too . For everything ... '' I said with a smile , that instantly turned into a frown as I saw tears running down Brian's face ...

'' Hey , hey ... Brian ... Don't you cry ! '' I said , slightly panicking the moment I saw no reaction from him . I hugged his head tightly , and rested my head on the crook of his neck ...

'' Please don't cry ... '' I said silently , and I heard Brian sniffle ...

'' I ... I missed you so f*cking much . I ... I promise you , Sierra , I'm never going to h-urt you again ... N-ever ... I swear . I j-ust .. I - '' he struggled to take a deep breath and then continued ...

'' I love you ... So much ... And I promise I won't let go ... of us ... Ever again ... '' he said , while looking straight in my eyes , and I smiled as I saw that the tears had stopped ...

'' I love you too ... And I won't let go ... '' I said quietly , and leaned forward and softly kissed his lips ...

'' Be my girlfriend again ? '' he asked sweetly , and I nodded while smiling , and feeling a huge wave of joy rush through me when I saw him smiling back ...

'' Of c- '' I tried saying , but the sound of a bullet hitting the back of the rock we were leaning on stopped me . A second bullet hit the rock , and immediately Brian covered my body with his . He kept me there , desperately trying to protect me , as the bullets kept on being fired all around us .

I thought I heard Brian screaming in pain at one moment , and I tried to get out of his grasp , but he wouldn't let me . Instead he leaned closer to me , and started whispering ...

'' It's going to be alright , baby ... Everything's going to be alright . It ... It will be over soon ... I love you , baby , I love you ... '' he kept on saying , and I could tell he was panicking too , but was trying so hard to remain calm for me ...

The firing kept on going for quite some time before it finally seized . Brian , though , didn't remove his body , he stayed there , afraid there'd be more shooting .

For some minutes , there were no sounds apart from mine and Brian's breathing . However , after some minutes , we heard footsteps coming towards us , something that only caused Brian to hold me tighter against him ...