I Can't Believe, I'm Actually Meant to Be Here!

***December 6Th, 2011***

"This is actually happening tomorrow." I stated as I stared at the wedding dress hanging on the outside of my closet door. I glanced over at the bags that were packed for the hotel we were staying at tomorrow, and for our honeymoon we'd be going on. "I'm getting married tomorrow."

"To Ronnie, of all people." Max laughed from his sitting position on Ronnie and I's bed. I laughed also, shaking my head. "What the hell are you getting yourself into?"

"I don't think I want to know..." I trailed off and grinned as I saw Ronnie standing in the doorway of the bedroom, pouting. "What do you mean what are you getting yourself into?!"

"Well I mean, she's marrying Ronnie Radke; what ISN'T she getting herself into?!" Max exclaimed. I nodded, laughing. Ronnie playfully glared at us, stomping into the bedroom to grab his phone off of the dresser.

We all walked out of the bedroom and out into the kitchen and main room, where everybody currently was for our, "Hey-we're-getting-married-tomorrow-let's-have-a-party-get-together-type-of-thing"...thing. We both agreed on not doing the traditional Bachelor and Bachelorette parties, since...well, we didn't want anything happening that would cause drama.

"Future Mrs. Radkeee!" Nasty exclaimed in a game-show host voice. "How does it feel knowing your marrying...that?" I started cracking up at the insulted look on Ronnie's face.

"Feels absolutely.....I don't know. Good?"

"JUST GOOD?!" Ronnie whined. I giggled and walked over to him, kissing his cheek. "Feels amazing, babe."

"Alright, save the mushy kissy shit for tomorrow, we'd all like to keep our dinner down." Derek chuckled. I stuck my tongue out at him, him returning the gesture.

"How many people are gonna be at this wedding?" Ryan asked curiously. I sighed and grabbed the guest list off of the counter, slipping my glasses on.

"My mom, Max, my grandparents, Ronnie's dad, Ronnie's two brothers, Ronnie's grandparents, you, your girlfriend, Jacky, Jacky's girlfriend, Derek, Christina, Mika, he's bringing no one with him because he's gonna be alone for the rest of his life," I paused to take a breath, giving Mika the time to shout out "HEY!". "Uhhh...some of Ronnie's friends...Samantha, who's Nasty's ex and my friend...Nasty himself...he's bringing no one either because he's also going to be alone for the rest of his life; hey maybe you and Mika should be each others dates?" I grinned at the two and they both glared playfully. Ronnie wrapped an arm around my shoulder as I continued reading off of the list. "Fuckin', uhhh...some other people I don't know that Ronnie knows...Elvis, the producer, obviously...Omar, Carson...a few people from Epitaph Ronnie's friends with...some other people who's names I do not recognize...and there'll be more bands and shit at the reception." I set the list down and smiled. "So really, it's a small wedding. It's the reception that'll be crazy."

"The reception's gonna feel like a tour, except we'll all be dressed nicer than usual." Max laughed. I nodded and giggled. "Preeetty much!"

The rest of the night was spent hanging out. Talking about tomorrow, talking about Ronnie and I, talking about the past, talking about the future, Max talking about when I'm gonna start popping out, as he said himself, "little hellions" and how if we have a boy we name it after him...

"Alright, it's getting late and we have a wedding tomorrow. Sooo, Sca-" Everyone started laughing as I shook my head and hugged Ronnie's middle tightly. "You're not taking him from me!" I whined.

"Baby," He laughed, wrapping an arm loosely around me. "we're gonna see each other tomorrow. At our wedding. And then after that we'll be seeing each other for the rest of our lives. I think you can survive one night and half of tomorrow without me."

My eyes widened at the "we'll be seeing each other for the rest of our lives" part, and I pushed him away from me. "Oh god, you're right. I gotta get away from you while I can." I started laughing at the sad, shocked look on his face. "THE WEDDING IS OFF!" He huffed.

"No it ain't! Not after how much money we spent on it!" I said, putting my hands on my hips.

"Already fighting like you've been married for 50 years." Mika teased.

"Because it already feels like we've been married for 50 years." I laughed again. Everybody started getting ready to go back to their places, and I kept pouting at Ronnie.

"What?" He laughed as he slipped his jacket on. I pouted even more, shuffling over to him like a little kid and wrapping my arms around his middle again. "I still don't want you to leave me." He chuckled and leaned down, giving me a kiss.

"Just think, tomorrow we're getting married. The day will probably go by so fast tomorrow, it'll make your head spin."

"But tonight's gonna drag on! And I probably won't even sleep." I complained.

"You've got Max staying with you tonight, it'll be fine." I sighed dramatically, which made him smile. "I gotta get going, babe."

"Fine." I grumbled. He chuckled and kissed me for as long as he could, before we were interrupted by a certain someone...

"Save it for the wedding, lovebirds! And the honeymoon! Where you'll make babies and name them after me." We both laughed into our kiss, pulling away finally. "I'll see you tomorrowww!" Ronnie sung as he walked out with the guys. I waved and told everyone goodbye as they left.

"Well.....alright then. Tomorrow's the day." I said as I closed the door and locked it. I turned to Max and he smiled. "My sister's getting married!"

"When are you getting married?" I teased, walking into the kitchen and leaning against the counter beside him.

"I have no fucking clue. I don't even have a girlfriend." He stated, running a hand through his almost-as-long-as-mine hair.

"Find one." He laughed. "You know, I was thinking about......reconciling with someone." I raised my eyebrow. "Oh? Who?"

"You'll shoot me." He chuckled. I blinked, but then I realized who he was talking about.

"Oh GOD. You know, it was bad enough I had to deal with her with Ronnie, now you want to get back with her and bring her into our lives again?!"

"I said I was thinking about it! I didn't say I was going to, sheesh." He put his hands up in defense. I shrugged. "As long as she doesn't start shit with Ronnie and I again, and she's not a bitch to me, do whatever you want."

"Like I said, thinking about it. Not sure if I want to." He told me in a tone that made it seem like I was stupid.

"Did you ever think Ronnie and I would be together?" I asked randomly. He chuckled and shook his head. "Hell no. You two were like brother and sister. We were all like siblings."

"Now we're getting married!" I laughed, throwing my hands in the air.

"It's like you're marrying your brother!" He exclaimed, laughing also. I stopped laughing and stared at him, grossed out. "Not me, dumbass." He laughed again.

"Ew." I shivered.

"You know...I'm not gonna lie...when you and I were like, 15..." I stared at him, and he started laughing even harder. "Well, you didn't know we were blood related, and guess what? Neither did I at the time! Mom told me we were actually cousins when I was like, 20!"

"YOU LIKED ME?!" I screeched, horrified.

"I kinda thought that you were hot! You were going through your "punk girl" phase and shit, I was into that shit!"

"EWW! MAX!" I whined.

"Oh calm down, I never would've done anything with you!" He chuckled.

"Still! We'd been "siblings" for like...8 years! 'Cause I was adopted when I was 7..." I thought out loud.

"Glad to know you can do simple math." I hit him in the arm and he whined, rubbing it. "Even after 8 years of living with me and having me in your family, you still thought, "Hey, we're not blood related, she's adopted, I can think she's hot!"?!"

"I WAS 15! I was probably going through my fuckin' horny teenage boy phase or some fuckin' shit!"

"Well thanks for telling me Max. Especially the night before my wedding. Now all I'll probably be able to think about when I'm saying my vows to Ronnie is you being attracted to me at one point in time when we were younger. Thanks." He started cracking up at how I said this, and he shook his head at me. "I don't think that way now about you, obviously. And besides, that lasted for like a week, then I was thinking some other girl was hot." I rolled my eyes, knowing that was typical Max.

"You thought your sister was hot. Weirdo." I laughed.

"Number 1; you were adopted and at the time I thought we weren't even blood related. Number 2; I was 15, young and horny. And number 3; I would've never "pursued" you or whatever. That would've been creepier." He counted on his fingers as he spoke, amusing me.

"Were you counting on your fingers because you always have a hard time remembering what comes after 2 or...?" He glared at me and I giggled. "Shut up."

"Alright, anyways..." I sighed. "I'm a little worried about something."

"What?"

".....You don't think that maybe...um...Ronnie's mom...?" Max raised his eyebrow.

"What, she'd be at the wedding?" I nodded. "How the fuck would she even know where it was? She might know about it, yeah, seeing as Ronnie's somewhat "famous", but I don't think she even has any way of contacting his dad or anybody in the family, for that matter."

"I know.....but stranger shit has happened." He nodded. "Yeah, but I still don't think that'll happen. In all honesty...I don't even know if she's alive anymore."

"That's what I was wondering too." I looked at him. He shrugged. "All I know is, is that when she left she apparently moved to Indiana. Or...Idaho...some state that started with an "I", I can't remember which." I snorted at my brother.

".....What was her name?" I asked quietly. Max shrugged. "I don't know. I never asked." I bit my lip. I don't think Ronnie had told any of us what her name was. Even I didn't know it.

"......Do you want to find her?" He asked, sounding surprised. I shook my head. "No. I don't want her at the wedding at all, that's why I'm kind of nervous that something like that would happen. But, it's just...it's kind of weird that none of us know her name. I think only Ronnie, and his dad and brothers know it." Max stared at me, nodding slowly.

"...That is kind of weird."

"I at least thought he would've told me and you." He nodded again. "But whatever. Don't tell him I talked to you about this, especially tomorrow. I don't need him getting weird."

"I won't, don't worry."

Silence consumed us for a minute, both of us just standing there.

"I don't know if I should bring this up," I turned my head and looked at him, him looking back at me. "but...are you kind of like, sad at all that you're dad won't be walking you down the aisle?"

I shook my head. "No, I'm not sad that my sperm doner won't be walking me down the aisle. I have you walking me down the aisle, that's all I could ever want." He smiled at me, wrapping an arm around me shoulders and pulling me into his side. "I wouldn't want anyone else walking me down the aisle."

"I was surprised you picked me and not your grandpa." I shrugged. "I haven't seen MY grandparents in like...8 or 9 years, I think. I'm surprised they even remember me." He laughed slightly. "Besides, the reason I picked you is because you're the family member I'm closest with. You're my brother. I may have been adopted, and we maybe technically be cousins, but you're still my brother to me."

"Quit making me feel all warm and fuzzy and mushy. I don't like that." I laughed, tilting my head up and pecking his cheek. "Oh I know, because you're just such a badass and you can't possibly have any other emotions other than the "dark" ones."

"Damn right." He grinned down at me. I wrapped both my arms around him and hugged him from the side. "Even though you're an idiot, I still love you and I'm glad you're gonna be at my wedding." He smiled down at me.

"Same here."

"......HEY!" I yelled, smacking him upside the head when I realized he basically just called me an idiot.