Forget It All

In all honesty, I don't know what the hell I'm doing here.

I would much rather be spending my last Friday night of college in my dorm room, on my bed, reading a good book with some tea. Is that too much to ask? I spent all the other weekends this year out and about. Socializing, meeting people and completing other antics that my parents would frown upon.

I was just tired. School was over. Shouldn't I be able to relax for one night? Tomorrow will be mayhem anyway- so much packing to do; so many goodbyes. It wasn't really that big a deal though, the goodbyes that is. I would see these people next year.

The only person I would truly miss is Harper, my roommate. I met her the first day I got here and from then on we were inseparable. I opened up to her and she opened up to me. About a month into our friendship she declared us as best friends- which I had no problem with since i had seemed to ditch my former best friends.

She was the first girl I trusted. I was betrayed in the past by my female friends. Harper wasn't like them though. She was sweet, compassionate and slightly pushy. But I needed that pushiness she had. If I didn't have that I wouldn't have met anyone this year.

But right this second, right here, right now, I could do without the blaring music, flashing lights and the fact that I felt so alone.

I was surrounded by people cheering, smiling, laughing, yet all I could think about was going home and how I desperately wished I didn't have to. I didn't want to face my parents- I wasn't ready for it.

My mother finally got some common sense and decided to divorce my father. After much protest, he agreed. But right now, they're in the process of separating- my father packing his shit up mainly.

It's most likely world war three at my house right now.

I feel bad for my younger brothers Shane and Ross, but truthfully, they're used to it by now.

"They really are great, aren't they?" Harper smiled, leaning over to me and shouting.

I laughed lightly and rolled my eyes as she gestured to the four guys on stage. I shrugged. "Yeah, they are."

The song that was playing finished and the crowd cheered wildly causing my ear drums to pound loudly. I cringed for a moment before looking over at Harper.

Sure enough, she disappeared from my side and over to Matt, her boyfriend. I sighed heavily and shook my head, laughing lightly. I walked over to the two of them and grinned.

"June," Matt addressed me. "I have a proposition for you."

"Do you now?"

"I'll tell her. She likes me more anyway." Harper giggled, walking away from Matt and back over to me.

"What are you guys planning now?" I muttered, running a hand through my messy hair. "You already got me to come out with you."

She sighed heavily and placed a hand on my shoulder. "You really need to gain a positive attitude one of these days."

I raised my eyebrows and smirked. "I had six different tests this week. Don't tell me to be positive."

She shook her head. "But it's all over now!" Her voice slowly got louder. "It's time to party! It's summer!"

I shook my head and turned my attention to the guys on stage who were just beginning to play their last song for the night.

"Come on June," Harper pleaded, "This may be our last night to hang out until next fall." She pouted.

I sighed heavily and draped an arm around her. "Why did I get stuck with you? How did you end up as my roommate?" I joked.

She stuck her tongue out at me and backed away from my arm. "Suit yourself."

She began to walk back to Matt when I called back to her, "Hey! What about that proposition?"

She rolled her eyes and glanced back at Matt, a smirked present on her lips. "Later."

I nodded my head and looked back on stage.

I couldn't help but thinking about going back home. It was going to be the most boring summer of my life. Not only was it a war zone at my house, but I wouldn't even have anything to help me through. Both Shane and Ross are going to sleep away camp and there's no way my mother is capable of anything. She'll be a mess.

And there was no way I could face John.

Not that he would be home. Summer tour. A long one too, at least that's what he told me when I talked to him last in February.

There wasn't really a reason to why we stopped talking. It was just that he was busy and I was busy. Whenever he called I wasn't around and whenever I called he wasn't around. It wasn't like we needed to speak desperately or anything. We just wanted to catch up.

But I felt bad not talking to him or even making an effort. But that was life. We would get to talk eventually. Until we minded each other's business. Every now and then we would get into an argument on the phone anyway. So I believe it's for the best.

The guys ran off stage after their finale. They sprinted past Harper, Matt and I in order to rush into the back room to get water or well, for most of them, some form of alcohol. The three of us followed them, making conversation, but nothing to interesting.

As we walked into the room, we interrupted whatever the guys were talking about. They all looked up at Harper and I and began to smile.

"We haven't seen you guys in so long!" Jack shouted, jumping up from the couch he was sitting on and running towards us. He engulfed both Harper and I in a sweaty hug.

"It was a month, Jack." I laughed, and looked at him. I was trying to remember the last time I saw John. Was it really Christmas? December? And that was only for about two days.

"That is too long!"

You think for a guy in a band constantly touring would have a better perception of time, but whatever. Jack was Jack- the crazy guitarist from All Time Low.

I went over to Rian, who was as sweet and nice as always and said hello. I then found myself in a conversation with Zack for about ten minutes before the guys decided to go outside and say hello to their fans.

Harper and Matt went outside with them as I decided to get a water bottle. I leaned against the wall in the now quiet room, taking a sip and closing my eyes. I sighed softly and rested my head up against the wall as well.

Suddenly, a hand placed itself beside me. I opened my eyes abruptly to find Alex Gaskarth in front of me, grinning.

"Thought you could get away from me, huh?"

I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help but smile. "You know, it almost worked."

"Well I guess the odds were in my favor tonight."

I shrugged. " I suppose so."

"So then, how about that drink?" He winked.

I cocked an eyebrow. "What drink?"

"You promised last time that we would get a drink together."

I sighed heavily and laughed. A confused expression planted itself across Alex's face. "You do know who you're talking to right?"

"Of course I do." His words were careful and you could almost hear the skepticism in them.

"What's my last name Alex?"

"O'Callaghan." His eyes lit up slightly which notified me that he was staring to understand what I was getting at.

"You know my brother might as well beat the living shit out of you for hitting on me."

Alex dropped his hand from my side, rolled his eyes and smiled. "I know," He laughed. "How did you even get through high school? Did John just scare away any boy that looked at you?"

I suck in a deep breath and exhaled then bit my lip. I looked down shaking my head and looked back up at Alex. "You have no idea."

Alex chuckled and shook my shoulder. "So how's John doing? Haven't seen him in about two months or so."

You would know better than me.

"Oh," I shrugged. "You know. Same old. Same old."

"You know we're going on tour with The Maine this summer."

My head snapped up and I looked at Alex. "You are?"

He nodded his head. "Yeah, he didn't tell you? You should come out for a couple dates. It'll be fun." He wiggled his eyebrows.

"Okay, now you're starting to annoy me." I chuckled, holding up a hand.

He chuckled as well and shook his head. We decided to walk outside with the rest of the band so Alex could meet some of his fans. As we walked down the long hallway Alex started to bring up John again.

"You know, every guy I talk to is afraid to even be within ten feet of you."

"Oh yeah? And who do you talk to?"

He shrugged. "Just about every guy in every band."

"I'm sure that's an exaggeration."

"I don't really get it though. It doesn't seem as if John is that protective of you. I don't think I've ever seen the two of you in the same place before anyway."

I laughed. "He's not," I looked down at my feet for a moment. "I mean, he gives me space now. But before it was pretty bad. But we, uh, we went through something and he decided to loosen up a bit. I just use it as an excuse so guys won't hit on me and try their corny pick up lines on me."

Alex's eyes widened and looked at me in disbelief. "You do not!"

I nodded my head. "I do."

"There are so many guys that want to ask you out, but were to scared because-"

I cut him off. "I'm boring, Alex. I'm not really anything special. They would have a much better time with some band slut anyway. I think of it as charity. I'm saving them from a huge mistake."

Alex pushed open the door to outside, where loud screams erupted. "That's not true June."

I sighed heavily and looked at the crowd of girls calling Alex's name. "Go to your fans. I'll talk to you later."

Alex hesitated for a second and sighed heavily. "I don't know what happened to you in the past June, but there's no reason to look down upon yourself."

He ran off the the crowd of girls and I smiled lightly. My mind wandered to another boy. I wondered what he was doing right at this moment. Probably doing the same- signing autographs, taking pictures with fans.

I found myself smiling lightly, but shook my head. Last year around this time we were happy. We were excited for prom, we were laughing, we were kissing, we were enjoying ourselves.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Okay, so what's going on?" I asked as Harper sat me down on the couch of All Time Low's tour bus.

She backed up so she was leaning against the counter in front of me next to Matt. She sucked in a deep breath. "So I know you're not doing anything this summer."

"That's correct." I muttered.

"Please just hang in there with me June. You're not going to like this, but you will eventually, I promise."

"That's not really making this sound appealing at all. I mean hey, I might as well say no right now, right?" I chuckled to myself looking at Matt and Harper who had solemn expressions.

"Matt offered me a job this summer on the road with them so I could be with him and so I could get some money."

"That's great!" I smiled, truly happy for my friend.

"He's also willing to give you a job too......" Harper trailed off.

"Oh, well, that's really nice of you Flyzik." I looked up at him and smiled. "Really. You don't have too."

"No, we need to help. Selling merch mainly. You wouldn't be working twenty four seven, but cash is cash, right?"

I laughed. "Right."

"And I know you weren't looking forward to going home this summer so......" Harper cringed, waiting for my answer.

I shrugged. "Sure. I'll do it."

Her eyes flickered open and she let out a small squeal. "Really?! Oh my god June! Thank you!"

I smiled. "Yeah. Of course I'll come. I could use some extra money anyway."

"This is gonna be great!" Harper turned to Matt and pecked him on the cheeked.

"Uh, Harper," Matt's smile faded as did the tone of his voice. "You haven't told her about ....." He trailed off.

Harper closed her eyes and groaned. "Why can't we just keep it a secret?" She whispered.

"I can hear you." I raised my eyebrows.

She sighed heavily and turned to me. "There's only one thing and you're not going to be happy about it."

"What?" I asked, my eyes narrowing in on her. I started to remember what Alex had said before. Who he said he was touring with. I was waiting for anything aside from that to come out of Harper's name. Anything but that. Maybe this was a different tour. Maybe he was mistaken. Anything but that.

"The Maine are gonna-"

I didn't even let her finish her sentence.

"No."