Changing Your Stars

Cam true to her nature threw up her horns. “Fuck yeah! You know it!”

“Doesn’t mean we’re yours yet.” We all looked at Dani, shy Dani was standing there with a little smirk on her face that I hadn’t seen before. She stood there for a second before continuing. “I haven’t decided if you’re good enough.”

Jimmy’s eyes narrowed on the braver more vocal Dani, but it wasn’t in anger. Oh no there was definite lust in his eyes. I had no doubt of where his mind was right now. And I did NOT want to go there in mine. “I’ll show you later how talented I am, but right now I gotta practice my rhythm… on the drums.”

Dani’s eyes went wide for a second before she licked her bottom lip, her eyes never leaving Jimmy. Ewwww…no…not naked Jimmy AND Dani! Man was there soap for the mind? Cause yeah I needed to scrub those images out of my head like NOW.

Deciding to make myself busy, so I wouldn’t be sick, I found two more empty milk carton thingys and pulled them up beside mine and Val’s. Once Dani and Cams was sitting the boys started to practice again, only it really did feel like a private concert. There was definitely more energy this time around, that’s for sure. But that wasn’t what got my attention the most. There was no way to miss how Bri, who usually looked at me when he played, was looking at Cams. Jimmy’s eyes were on Dani, Matt on Val, and Zacky was looking…at me.

I couldn’t breathe. The look on his face stole the air from my lungs. It was so…hungry. I swallowed hard under his gaze. No guy had ever looked at me like that. It made me feel…so…different, so alive, so…wanted. The spell was broken when he looked away from me. Holy shit what was that?! Okay no being alone with Zacky for the rest of the night, period.

Of course that was easier said than done. An hour later band practice was over and we were heading into Matt’s house. The bassist who I learned was also named Matt, took off as soon as they were done, which was fine cause he was a whiny bitch. Jimmy had picked up Dani, thrown her over his shoulder and headed inside laughing like a lunatic.

“Hey who said I wanted to walk?!” Cams yelled jokingly at the backs of the fast disappearing duo.

Brian squatted down in front of her. “Hop on.”

Cams jumped on him so fast I swear I barely saw her move. “Getty up horsy!”

Brian smirked as he grabbed a hold of her thighs, not that her legs didn’t have a death grip on his waist. “Babe you can ride me anytime you want.”

A devilish light lit up her eyes. “I’ll have to remember that. Now getty up horsy!” Cam smacked Brian on the ass before they took off towards the house both laughing.

Of course this left Zacky and I alone, the one thing I said couldn’t happen tonight. “Well we should head inside too.” I had just stepped away when I felt Zacky grab a hold of my hand stopping me.

Gently he tugged on it, pulling me back to him. “Come here for a sec first.”

I looked over his back at where his guitar laid. “You’re really good.” Yeah I’m stalling…I know.

My heart did a somersault when he grinned. “Don’t sound so surprised.”

I stuck my tongue out at him for a second. “I’m not. I’m impressed. God knows I couldn’t play that thing.”

Zacky just looked at me. “Of course you can.”

“I’m tellin ya. I’m so not talented like that.”

“Only one way to settle this.” I watched as Zacky picked up a different looking guitar. I think they’re called acoustic guitars? “Lift your arm up.” I obeyed his command and soon the guitar, with some adjusts to the strap, was firmly on me.

I looked back at him an eyebrow raised. “And I’m supposed to know what to do now?”

He laughed as he wrapped his arms around me and took a hold of my hands, holding them in his larger, rougher ones. “Not yet. I’m going to teach you. Although I thought you were smart enough to figure it out.”

His teasing was putting me at ease when normally I’d be having a panic attack about doing something for the first time. With my mother I had been expected to be perfect at EVERYTHING, ALL THE TIME. If I couldn’t do it perfectly within what she deemed an acceptable amount of time it was yet another failure of mine. I remembered my very first dance recital. I had been five years old and made one tiny misstep. My mother had punished me, taking away every toy I had. All I did that summer was practice my ballet until I could do that routine and many, many, others flawlessly without thought. I could hear my mother’s voice in my head. ‘Perfection is the key to happiness and love. Without it you are nothing…NOTHING! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!’

I hadn’t realized I’d retreated into my head until I heard Zacky’s soft voice in my ear. “Hey…”
I almost jumped at the soft sound. I turned hitting him solidly with the guitar. “Oh…I…I’m sorry.”

Zacky took it from me placing it gently in its case while I stood there trying to shake the feeling of the sad little girl I had been, maybe still was partly. He walked back over to me silently, wrapping me up in his arms. It made no sense but I felt safe there.

I wrapped my arms around his waist, relaxing into him. I closed my eyes and rested my head on his chest. We just stood there silently holding each other for a few minutes. Finally I pushed away from him a small smile on my lips. “We better head inside before they start getting ideas.”

Zacky grinned down at me. “Well in that case.” He reached over and messed up my hair and unbuttoned a few of the buttons on his shirt. I laughed as I realized his intent; we sure looked like we had been ‘busy’ in here.

I couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re horrible.”

He wiggled his eyebrows at me. “I try.”

Zacky and I headed inside the house to join the others. They were all downstairs in the living room watching some movie. They all turned to look at us at once. Jimmy let out a low whistle. “Way to go Zacky.”

Brian looked at us for a split second before turning his attention back to the movie. I flinched having seen the look of hurt in his eyes, how was I going to do this? How could I see Zacky when my best friend, his friend and band mate, liked me? “Hey Bri can I talk to you for a second?”

Brian just looked at me, obviously surprised. “Yeah sure.”

When he didn’t move I nodded towards the doorway. “Alone.”

Now I had everyone’s attention. I groaned. “Get your minds out of the gutter you perves.”

Zacky put his arm around my shoulders. “Yeah, I mean fuck, I just wore her out.”

Matt hollered from his spot on the loveseat beside Val. “Dude that’s my fucking garage! You want to fuck in a garage go to your damn house.”

Zacky chuckled as I ducked out from under his arm. “You coming Bri?”

“Yeah.” He replied following me out into the kitchen. Why did things keep happening in the kitchen anyhow?

I leaned against one counter with Brian on the exact opposite one facing me. “We need to talk.”

Brian raised one perfect eyebrow up at me. “About?”

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, it was now or never. “You liking me.”

Brian’s face turned into a mask. Guess he wasn’t going to make this easy. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

I crossed my arms over my chest, my ‘I mean business’ look on my face. “So you’re gonna lie to me now. Nice to know you think so little of me.” I let my voice waver slightly on the last part. It was cheating, I knew he didn’t but it was the only way to get him to talk to me seriously about this I was sure of it.

Sure enough Brian sighed rubbing the back of his neck. “Aww Kinzi. You know it’s not like that.”

I just looked at him. “Then what is it like Brian?”

“Fuck.” He grunted.

I waited patiently for him to continue. When he didn’t, it was my turn to let out a small sigh. I looked at the floor my shoulders slumping slightly. I knew what I had to do. I didn’t look up when I mumbled. “I won’t see him if it bothers you.”

Brian’s boots were suddenly in my view. His finger lifted my chin up until I was staring into his chocolate brown eyes. His eyes searched mine for I don’t know what. I guess he found what he was looking for because a second later his lips were on mine.

His lips were warm and soft, sure in their purpose. Brian’s kiss was well thought out, it was a seduction meant to entice but it wasn’t the same as Zacky’s. Zacky’s kisses dominated, made my head spin and my pulse race. I missed the hardness of his snake bites pressing into my lips, the passion that made me feel like I was the only girl in the world he wanted to kiss.

Brian pulled back frowning, evidentially he could tell I wasn’t really into the kiss. “You really like him don’t you?”

I shrugged. Zacky and I barely knew each other but I felt like maybe we could have something special given time. “Yeah, I think I do.”

Brian gave me a small smile. “Well at least now I know I did everything possible.”

I grabbed a hold of one of his hands. “You’re still one of my best friends. You mean enough to me that I wouldn’t see Zacky if you asked me not to.”

“But you’d be happier if I was okay with it.”

I shrugged.

Brian pulled me into a tight embrace. “He hurts you and he’s dead. After all, rhythm guitarists can be replaced.”

I hugged him back just as fiercely. “Thanks Bri.” We stood there for a second longer before I spoke again. “We’re good?”

Brian pressed a kiss to the top of my head before letting go and stepping back. “Yeah Pix, we’re good.”

I smiled up at him as a great idea hit me all of a sudden. “You know I happen to think that you and Cam make a really cute couple.”

Brian’s eyes lit up. I had his attention now. “That so?”

I smiled wider. “Yep and she totally thinks you’re hot too.”

I let out a sigh of relief as his ‘I’m up to no good’ grin made an appearance. “Well then that proves she’s a smart girl worthy of my attention.”

I laughed. He wasn’t being smug or cocky, he was being Brian. He talked a good game but he was a great guy who really was down to earth. “Okay well said smart girl is waiting for you back in the other room.”

“Come on Kinz. Your man no doubt is going crazy thinking that I’m taking advantage of you.”

I rolled my eyes as we walked back towards the living room. “You boys are led by your dicks.”

Brian shrugged. “You’re just figuring this out now?”

I was laughing when we walked back into the living room. The only people that looked at us this time were Cams and Zacky. They both looked worried and it made them love them more. Brian took his place beside Cams, making sure to put his arm around her shoulders.

I looked around the room trying to figure out where I was going to sit. All of the seats were taken. I was pouting when I looked at Zacky and he patted his lap. Chewing my bottom lip I stood there debating with myself whether or not to go. I told myself it was my hatred of sitting on the floor that had me crawling onto his lap. I rested my head on his chest as his arms wrapped around me. Our fingers intertwined and I relaxed into him.

The rest of the night went pretty uneventful. We watched one more movie before it was time for me, Dani, and Cam to head home. This time Zacky and I didn’t get interrupted during our goodnight kiss. It was everything it had been earlier and I knew I had chosen correctly. I practically danced up to my room I was so giddy. It took forever, but I finally fell asleep my dreams filled with a boy with a wicked grin and beautiful green eyes.