Been to Hell

Emily’s Point Of View

I awoke to someone screaming angry words outside of the bedroom that I was sleeping in. I wanted to get up and see what was wrong, but I was to weak with pain to even muster up the courage to try. Even though I could tell Zane was the one being screamed at, and the only thing I wanted to do was help him, I couldn’t. I was just helpless.

“You have no right to be screaming at me! You are the one who blackmail us and get us stuck here in the first place. Do you really think that she is okay!? She needs to be in a hospital and you’ve forced me to take her away from the only thing that’s saving her life!” Zane screamed in anger. I could tell he was angry and he didn’t want me here, but why were we here? He said blackmail, so it has to be something to do with his step father. I’m still terrified of that man, how could he survive being stabbed that many times. I was sure we were going to be free, now everything is ruined once more.

“I told you that I’ve got someone coming to take care of her, she just has to stay alive for a week! Now go take care of her and leave me the hell alone!” A deep voice snapped, I could tell it wasn’t Peter. But he was the one who picked us up, so it was safe to assume that he was the person behind this. Or maybe he was just involved.

The tan bedroom door opened and then a tired looking Zane stepped inside. His green eyes had bags underneath them, and his tan skin seemed paler. He hadn’t realized I was up yet, so he didn’t try to contain himself.

He slammed the door shut so hard that frame rattled. I remembered when I use to be scared of his strength, but now I’m just glad he’s able to protect us. His feet hit the floor heavily as he walked towards the bed. That’s when he found my open eyes, and trembling body. When he looked at me it was like all of him anger faded, but I wasn’t able to understand why.

“Are you feeling okay, love?” He whispered, sitting down beside me. Never allowing his eyes to look away.

“Who’s blackmailing us?” I hummed, Just wanting to understand everything, it was like my brain was empty. I didn’t like being kept in the dark like this.

“You don’t know him, its my fault. He’s not really blackmailing us, more or less me. He told me that I have to come with him to Alaska, but I couldn’t leave you there. I wasn’t sure if I was coming back, and I didn’t want to leave you.” He explained, leaning over to pull open the drawer on the nightstand.

When I glanced inside I found about five different prescribed pill bottles. Most of them had Zane written on the paper. But it wasn’t the actual sticker that the pharmacy put on there, it was an actual paper taped to the bottle. So probably three of them had Zane written on the paper, with what ever the pill was written underneath it.

The one he grabbed first had pain written underneath his name, the second one he grabbed said Zane’s happy pills. That almost made me giggle, then I remembered they were for his depression so I held my giggle back.

He opened the pain pills and grabbed two, pressing them to my lips and forcing me to swallow them. I’ll admit that the aftertaste was revolting and made me want to hurl. But I sucked it up and pressed my head into the pillow further. My eyes watched closely as he took two ‘happy pills’ out and twisted the capsule open, pouring the powder onto the nightstand.

“What are you doing?” I whispered, worried. If he snorts these in front of me I’m going to back hand him as had as my weak little body can muster.

“These taste bad.” He informed, brushing the powder into his hand then allowing it to fall into my water glass. I was sure that wasn’t a good idea, that you weren’t supposed to do that. But I wasn’t in the mood to argue with him. “Here.” He held the glass to my lips but I gently pushed it away. Unsure why he was trying to get me to take these.

“Why are you trying to give me your depression pills?” I whined, shivering a bit when the room’s walls squeaked. That scared me to the point where I almost jumped up and hugged the head board of the bed. But Zane held me down and held the glass to my lips once more.

“Because they will help you sleep, its very hard to sleep in the camper when its moving.” I looked around, thinking he was crazy. This didn’t look like a room to a camper. It was big and had dressers in front of the bed, even a mirror on the wall next to the bed. I found myself not believing him, until the room seemed to jerk forward and everything that wasn’t strapped in fell to the floor. “Come on, hon. If you don’t take these the pain pills will keep you awake. Plus they aren’t going to help the pain that much, I know its easer when you are sleeping, I don’t like knowing you are hurt.” That time, when he held the glass up to my lips, I took a small drink. That seemed to please him because he drank the rest of it. Which scared me, I don’t like him taking drugs, but then again they are his depression pills and he might need them.

When he rested his heavy body on the other end of the bed, I felt a wave of disappointment flood my body. Maybe something really was wrong with him. He rolled so he wasn’t facing me, and he pulled the blankets so I couldn’t see anything but his head.

“Zane?” I said, watching him turn his head to answer me. “Why are you over there? Did I do something wrong?”

He chuckled a bit. “No, I just don’t want to hurt you. You do realize that I haven’t been able to have a make out session with you since before our little fight, I have no self control when you decide that its time to start kissing me. That’s the only reason why you want me over there and I’m not about to give you the chance to hurt yourself.” My eyes rolled. Sure, he was right about me wanting to kiss him and hold him, but he was the one who always brought it the next step. So really its not my fault.

With all my strength I pushed myself closer to him, happy that he got my message then rolled over. At first neither of us made a move, we just sat there and watched each others faces. His hand eventually came up and rested on my cheek, leaning in to press his lips to mine. Ever so gently hooking an arm around my waist. I decided that it was best to hold my pain in and crawl closer, wrapping my arms around his neck.

“Good night, Emily.” He chuckled. Yet again I found myself disappointed.

“But I just got up.” I whined, trying to lean in to kiss him once more. But he chuckled and pulled back.

“I told you we aren’t doing anything, a few kisses is fine but for now you need to sleep. You actually have only been to sleep for a couple of hours, and as soon as you fall asleep those pills will keep you asleep. You really don’t have to be tired.” He chuckled. Smoothing my hair back with the palm of his hand. I started pouting. If I was going to be stuck sleeping all the time I’m going to have quite the boring life. “Stop giving me that look.” He demanded, pulled away and rolling over again.

“Will you at least keep me warm.” I whined, lifting his arms to try and snuggle underneath it.

“You need to stop moving around, Emily.” He sighed, rolling back over and piling the blankets on top of us. Then he held me close to him, running his hands up and down my back. “I’m sorry that I got you into this mess.”

“So what, I like it here.” I giggled. Wincing a bit when my chest moved like that. “If you hadn’t taken me I would’ve been dumped on the side walk by the orphanage and I would’ve had to live on the streets. Someone would’ve murdered me, or stole from me , or worse. I would’ve died.” He nodded a bit and tucked his face against my shoulder, allowing his warm breath to spill across my neck.

“I should’ve allowed you to live a normal life. I’ve ruined it for you.”

“It was already ruined, you just fixed it. I could’ve have survived without you doing what you did, Zane. Sure it was horrible at first, but I love you for doing that you did now. If you hadn’t done that I wouldn’t be engaged to the most perfect protective man on this earth, and I wouldn’t be completely head over heels for him. I wouldn’t be sad to find out that I wasn’t having his baby, and I wouldn’t be happy that he was the one nursing me back to health. I love you, and that’s all that matters. Please stop dwelling on the past.” I informed, finding myself stroking his hair this time, feeling his warm tears begin to drip onto my collar bone and gather at my shoulder.

“Were you really that sad that you weren’t pregnant?” He whispered, tensing up when he felt my nod. He has no idea how much I want to have a family with him. “Emily, it would hurt you to have a baby right now and you know that, it could very well kill you. I’d rather have you alive then risking your life for a baby that your body cannot support. I promise someday I will start a family with you, but for now can we please just be happy that we are alive? Maybe we should wait to get married first as well.”

“Zane, I probably won’t be able to marry you until I’m eighteen anyway.” I whined, crossing my arms over my chest.

“Emily, you are all that matters to me. I’m telling you that you cannot talk me out of this. When you are healthy enough I may reconsider, but for now I just want you to be resting. Can’t you please just agree with me?”

“Fine.” I growled. That was the last of our conversation for the night, I was tired of this already. I want to get better so we can go back to our normal lives. I’m tired of being helpless.