Sequel: The Way You Lie ›
Status: Hope you love it as much as you loved How To Save A Life :)
Been to Hell
Don't Tell Me Your Scared
Emily’s Point Of view
To be honest, Zane’s reaction scared me. Well really, the thing that scared me was the fact that I couldn’t tell if he was mad or just plain sad. I didn’t want him being either of those things. So really, I was very angry at myself for allowing those words to even escape my mouth.
Just in attempt to make him feel better I tightened my arms around him. Trying to make him kiss me and just forget I said anything. Hopefully he’d just let it go I don’t want him to feel bad. He was one of the best protectors I’ve ever hand, I shouldn’t feel scared when I’m with him.
“Please take that back.” He whispered, leaning away from me a little bit. “Tell me your not scared, it’s the only thing that keeps me sane. I need you to tell me that we can make it through this.” It was like he was begging, I didn’t like that. Knowing that I was his rock scared me even more, he is my rock. I’m the one who needs him to reassure me, knowing that he needed the same thing from me terrifies me.
“Okay.” I was lying straight through my teeth, but he needed to hear this. “I’m not scared, Zane.”
He didn’t answer me, he just looked down at his feet for a moment. Tracing my fingers until he slipped his hand into his pocket, pulling out a zip lock bag. Inside it was a bunch of white pills, I knew what they were. My old pain pills, the ones he use to knock me out the first time we met Peter.
“I know your leg hurts.” He stated, opening it and pulling out three. Way to many, but I wasn’t going to protest with him now. At least these would help me sleep for long enough to ignore the pain in my leg and the dirtiness of that motel. He moved his hand up to my mouth, awaiting for me to open and allow them inside. But I didn’t really want to, there was no water here-nothing to wash it down. “Emily.” He wasn’t really in the mood for complaining, so I just allowed him to slip them through my lips and I tried to swallow them before the taste could spread. Sure I got them down, but I still found myself leaning over to gag-hoping not to puke on his shoes. Actually I’d rather not puke at all. “Now I’ll get the room then go out to get the things we need.”
“Zane.” I whispered, looking up at him. He looked at me carefully, I could tell he was still worried about the whole scared thing. Guilt filled my body. “It’s okay to be scared, it’s a natural feeling. I’ll tell you what I’m scared about.” I was lying again, but I’d do anything to lift his sprits. We need his best game to be able to survive life now. I have a feeling that I’m going to have a lot of time of my hands when he forces himself to find a job. “I’m scared that one day you are going to leave and never come back to me. Just like everyone else did, I’m afraid you’ll realize what everyone else did. That I’m just some dumb little girl that no one wants.” To be honest I don’t know where that come from, but I know it wasn‘t the best thing to tell him. I still wasn’t sure if he can handle my feelings.
It seemed to my that he was laughing a little bit. “Damn, Emily we’re both going to need therapy when we are finally done with all this drama.” He pulled me into a tight hug and helped me into his arms, picking me up to walk us quickly across the street and through the McDonalds parking lot. Deep in thought the whole time until we got to the front door of the motel. “You didn’t deserve to be treated in such a way, darling. I hate them for leaving you like that, I’ll never do that to you. I promise.” Tears filled up in my eyes and I tucked my head against his shoulder, trying not to cry to hard. That was the nicest thing anyone had really ever said to me, aside from the ‘I love yous’ he granted me.
“Zane,” I whimpered. “please don’t leave me until I fall asleep.” I just felt him nod.
To be honest, Zane’s reaction scared me. Well really, the thing that scared me was the fact that I couldn’t tell if he was mad or just plain sad. I didn’t want him being either of those things. So really, I was very angry at myself for allowing those words to even escape my mouth.
Just in attempt to make him feel better I tightened my arms around him. Trying to make him kiss me and just forget I said anything. Hopefully he’d just let it go I don’t want him to feel bad. He was one of the best protectors I’ve ever hand, I shouldn’t feel scared when I’m with him.
“Please take that back.” He whispered, leaning away from me a little bit. “Tell me your not scared, it’s the only thing that keeps me sane. I need you to tell me that we can make it through this.” It was like he was begging, I didn’t like that. Knowing that I was his rock scared me even more, he is my rock. I’m the one who needs him to reassure me, knowing that he needed the same thing from me terrifies me.
“Okay.” I was lying straight through my teeth, but he needed to hear this. “I’m not scared, Zane.”
He didn’t answer me, he just looked down at his feet for a moment. Tracing my fingers until he slipped his hand into his pocket, pulling out a zip lock bag. Inside it was a bunch of white pills, I knew what they were. My old pain pills, the ones he use to knock me out the first time we met Peter.
“I know your leg hurts.” He stated, opening it and pulling out three. Way to many, but I wasn’t going to protest with him now. At least these would help me sleep for long enough to ignore the pain in my leg and the dirtiness of that motel. He moved his hand up to my mouth, awaiting for me to open and allow them inside. But I didn’t really want to, there was no water here-nothing to wash it down. “Emily.” He wasn’t really in the mood for complaining, so I just allowed him to slip them through my lips and I tried to swallow them before the taste could spread. Sure I got them down, but I still found myself leaning over to gag-hoping not to puke on his shoes. Actually I’d rather not puke at all. “Now I’ll get the room then go out to get the things we need.”
“Zane.” I whispered, looking up at him. He looked at me carefully, I could tell he was still worried about the whole scared thing. Guilt filled my body. “It’s okay to be scared, it’s a natural feeling. I’ll tell you what I’m scared about.” I was lying again, but I’d do anything to lift his sprits. We need his best game to be able to survive life now. I have a feeling that I’m going to have a lot of time of my hands when he forces himself to find a job. “I’m scared that one day you are going to leave and never come back to me. Just like everyone else did, I’m afraid you’ll realize what everyone else did. That I’m just some dumb little girl that no one wants.” To be honest I don’t know where that come from, but I know it wasn‘t the best thing to tell him. I still wasn’t sure if he can handle my feelings.
It seemed to my that he was laughing a little bit. “Damn, Emily we’re both going to need therapy when we are finally done with all this drama.” He pulled me into a tight hug and helped me into his arms, picking me up to walk us quickly across the street and through the McDonalds parking lot. Deep in thought the whole time until we got to the front door of the motel. “You didn’t deserve to be treated in such a way, darling. I hate them for leaving you like that, I’ll never do that to you. I promise.” Tears filled up in my eyes and I tucked my head against his shoulder, trying not to cry to hard. That was the nicest thing anyone had really ever said to me, aside from the ‘I love yous’ he granted me.
“Zane,” I whimpered. “please don’t leave me until I fall asleep.” I just felt him nod.