The Randomest Collection of Stories about Pretty Much Anything You Can Create a Story About

Chapter Who-Gives-A-Fck-Anymore?

ALL THE AWESOME BANDS CAME TO BLENDON MIDDLE SCHOOL AND EVERYONE FELL IN LOVE WITH MARK HOPPUS! But Mark Hoppus only wanted Emma and left all the other girls heartbroken (all 6.75 of them. How do you get 0.75 of a girl...exactly). Anyway.

THEN TRAVIS BARKER TAUGHT SUMMER HOW TO DRUM AND SIGNED A PARENT CONSENT FORM FOR SUMMER AND EMMA AND THEY GOT A TATTOO WITH TRAVIS BARKER!!

THEN SUMMER AND TOM DELONGE MADE OUT IN A BROOM CLOSET!!!! THEN TOM ASKED SUMMER OUT AND SHE SAID YES!!

This is the best chapter yet...

THE END
(PS I wish...)

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If this was real, I'd die happy.
I'm listening to Blink's new album, Neighborhoods. It's flipping amazing, man.