Wild Things.

“I’m full,” Jack mumbles rubbing her stomach lightly with a small smile on her lips. She moves her eyes from the empty pizza box above the table to Paul and smirks. “Are we up for tonight?”

“Of course.” Paul smirks and the people around the table look curiously to them.

“What are we doing tonight?” Ryan questions Jack with a tone of voice that transmitted his annoyance.

“It’s going to be fun,” Jack tells him with a glint on her eyes. She moves her attention to Paul once again and smirks. “I trust that you have everything…”

“Honey can’t you see that he has everything? Just look at him!” Henry states with a grin that made Paul widen his eyes which automatically led to Jack, Enza, Sasha and Yvette laughing.

“What are you guys up to?” Enza inquires once she stopped laughing.

“It’s one of Jack’s silly revenges,” Embry responds.

“You aren’t fun anymore Embry.” Jack narrows her eyes to him. She gets up from the chair and slaps his arm, with a serious expression she starts speaking. “I sold my soul to the devil so there isn’t anything silly in this revenge. Yes, I might have agreed if you said that it was elaborate and unpractical, but silly?” Jack narrows her eyes once again and shoves a finger in Embry’s forehead. “It’s not silly. It requires a lot of work and I’ll need many hands to help me. Which reminds me…” Jack looks to Paul that had an amused smile. “Did you speak with Jared?”

“He’ll be there.” Paul nods his head making Jack smile.

“Great. It’s going to be fun,” Jack mumbles and sits again.

“Jack could you just say what you’re planning? I’m dying here,” Chester says and Dave nods his head in agreement.

“Who annoyed you?” Ryan chimes in.

“Who’s the devil you sold your soul to?” Enza inquires looking briefly to Felix and Jane that shook their heads to tell Enza that they had nothing to do with it.

“Doesn’t this sound like something out of a soap opera?” Sasha asks Henry that sighed.

“The Mexican ones are always the best. The men,” Henry groans lightly and he and Yvette start laughing.

“I’m good looking too,” Embry utters and once he realizes what he said he starts blushing.

“Of course you are. The Lord knows what I want to do to you.” Yvette smirks and winks her eye to Embry which made his blush become redder.

“Dirty,” Jack mumbles after a laugh. “So it started like a week ago,” Jack tells them in a more serious tone of voice. “I was walking to class when Jaws--”

“Jaws?” Chester asks tilting his head to the left.

“You’re pranking that girl again?” Enza asks and when Jack nods her head she starts laughing. “Dio mio Jack! Weren’t the mice enough?”

“No, she tried to trip me in the hallway.” Jack crosses her arms over her chest and narrows her eyes lightly. “Her existence annoys me.”

“So what did that girl--”

“Jaws,” Jack corrects interrupting Dave.

“Jaws did exactly?” Dave says finishing his sentence.

“A week ago I was walking to class when Jaws came to me. Jack looks to Paul and tosses him a fork that he caught effortlessly. “It was supposed to hit your fat head,” Jack mumbles after a sigh making him smirk.

“Focus Jack,” Henry demands. “I want know the drama behind the nickname you gave her. Jaws can mean almost anything. She can have shark teeth or a humungous jaw--”

“She bit me,” Jack half yells with annoyance making Enza laugh and shake her head. “That crazy psycho started a fight with me and bit me of all things! Who the hells bites someone in a fight?” Jack rants with annoyance.

“Thus the name Jaws,” Embry tells them and sighs. “But let us continue or she will rant about that for hours…”

“I would not.” Jack crosses her arms over her chest defensively. Embry raises an eyebrow which made Jack sigh. “Maybe I would because it’s really silly to bite someone. Humans biting humans,” Jack mumbles under her breath.

“That was when her quest for vengeance started,” Jane says since she wanted to distract the humans from Jack’s words.

“Yes. The first ones were kind of simple… Mice in the lockers, once she forgot her window opened so I filled her car with shaving cream…” Jack tells him with a small smile. “But this is going to be my master piece which leads us to Enza question.” Jack makes a pause and smiles making Chester and Dave groan in annoyance. “I was working when I had this idea. Harriet was telling me how much of a hassle it had been--”

“The lady you work for?” Ryan asks making Jack grunt.

“Why are you telling us about her? What’s her connection to this? Go to the steamy parts already,” Sasha demands making Jack narrow her eyes.

“If I’m going to tell this I have to tell it right. Besides,” Jack mumbles with annoyance. “To fully answer Enza’s question I have to speak about Harriet.”

“Go on then,” Enza says with a smile.

“So Harriet was telling how much of a hassle it had been to remove her gnomes under the snow.”

“I can’t see what--” Dave declares. Jack shot him a glare that made him raise his hands in an ‘I surrender’ manner. “Go on.”

“So I thought: What would happen if she had hundreds of gnomes?” Jack makes a pause and Enza automatically started laughing being followed by her friends and Chester while Ryan and Dave looked to each other. “Of course that the problem was: where would I get that amount of gnomes? I managed to buy like 10 gnomes.” Jack wrinkles her nose and smiles. “Ten gnomes aren’t fun but I had already reached the monthly amount I was allowed to spend in gnomes. So I had to try other approaches. I walked around asking people to donate gnomes for a good cause.” Enza raises an eyebrow and shakes her head lightly. “It was for a good cause.” Jack mumbles defensively making Enza laugh once again. “I had like 40 then and it still wasn’t enough for what I was planning. It was when I got a call from the devil. She wanted to ask me something about the lamps--”

“Alice is your devil?” When Jack nods Enza burst in laughter.

“I asked her if she had gnomes and well I had to tell her the whole story since she didn’t believe that it was for a good cause. Anyway she agreed to give me 150 gnomes if I wore some of her silly clothes. Now I know that she had been probably planning everything to that dinner of hers… But who cares? I have the gnomes!” Jack says excitedly with a childish smile.

“Try not to be arrested,” Enza tells her with a smile. “I would hate have to tell mama that you’ve gone to jail because of gnomes...”

“Don’t mock me,” Jack demands crossing her arms over her chest. “Just wait till that dinner. You and V-man are going to suffer!”

“V-man?” Henry raises an eyebrow and Jack gasps.

“Yes… V stands for…” Jack starts to look around trying to find help.

“Vibrant,” Embry mumbles.

“Victim,” Felix chimes in with a smirk

“Vegetarian,” Jane says.

“Virile,” Enza interjects.

“Vaccine,” Paul utters.

“Violator!” Jack almost yells. All of Jack’s and Enza’s friends started to look to each other and then to the people that were randomly saying things that started with the letter V. Then they all moved their attention to Jack that nervously laughed.

“We have a hard time keeping up with the names she calls him,” Paul explains them smoothly. They all moved the attention to Jack, once again, that nodded her head and shrugged making shook their heads. When Enza realized that they had believed their excuse she smiled and fought the urge to sigh.

“She likes to tease us,” Enza adds.

“It’s not you and him don’t deserve it. Always getting freaky everywhere…” Jack mumbles under her breath. “Sometimes when I sit on the couch I have the urge to jump because you probably had sex with him there.” Embry automatically blushes and sighed. “You know it’s true.”

“Anyway… We should go Jack,” Paul says getting up. “We still have to go to my house.”
“Yes.” Jack gets up immediately and when she realizes that Embry was still sitting, next to Yvette, she narrows her eyes to him. “She is going to be here later and you’ll be able to continue your mysterious conversations with her.” Jack pulls him by the arm and when Embry doesn’t move an inch she slaps his head. “Get up Hoover!”

Thirty minutes later they left the house and entered the truck. It took them that time not only because Embry was rather reluctant in leaving but also because everyone started teasing him. Jack had also been forced to go to her bedroom to get a warmer coat and when they noticed the subtle changes in Jack’s room several questions were asked. Like the pictures that used to be attached to her door were in a pile above her desk, some of them were crumbled and others seemed to be torn. The door was also different and what the boys had insisted in hearing a detailed explanation: Why did she have a huge calendar in the wall in front of her door?

“Is it so odd that I have a calendar?” Jack walks to her closet decided to react in a normal fashion to their question. She glances in Paul’s direction and sees him smirking which irritated her.

“It’s a big calendar,” Ryan states with confusion patent on his voice. “But it isn’t the calendar itself…”

“Yeah,” Chester muses looking to Jack with his left eyebrow raised. “The calendar would be normal, even if you never had a calendar in Vegas.”

“Maybe I decided that I needed a calendar,” Jack mumbles with her eyes narrowed.

“By looking at it.” Dave walks to the wall to better inspect the calendar. “It seems you use it quiet often. It’s filled with stars and angry red crosses.”

“Its happy red crosses,” Paul corrects them with amusement. Jack that was getting annoyed at their inquisitions and feeling that Paul’s behavior would make it worse bends and picks a shoe to throw at him. “You know they’re happy crosses,” he tells her with a smile tossing the shoe that he had caught before hitting him back to the ground.

“They are angry,” Dave mumbles with confusion. He takes the index to the paper and traces the crosses. “In some parts it even ripped the paper apart. I can only imagine her anger crossing these days out…”

“I bet that she was twitching her lips and furrowing her eyebrows.” Chester chuckles heartily imagining the scene.

“She was probably cursing under her breath too,” Ryan adds with a grin.

“Sometimes she was.” Paul laughs which made Dave and Chester look to him with curiosity while Ryan glared.

“Get out of my room,” Jack says with exasperation.

“What do the stars and the crosses stand for?” Chester asks without moving.

“Nothing that concerns you.” Jack crosses her arms over her chest and narrows her eyes.

“Don’t be like that… Tell us,” Ryan pleads with a small smile assuming that she wouldn’t tell them because they made fun of her seconds ago.

“Yes, tell us why you have happy red crosses on your big calendar?” Paul smirks knowing that his words would annoy her even further. He knew that with that Jack would kick everyone out of the room and the conversation would end. And he needed it to end or the guys would probably try to hit him.

“Out now!” Jack yells and everyone starts walking in a hurry to the door.

Jack had gotten the calendar in the airport when she was returning to Forks from Volterra. She had been inebriated with the happiness of not only surviving the Volturi but surviving everything without seeing Paul naked even once. To commemorate the accomplishment she bought the biggest calendar she saw and once she was home she decided to stick it in a place where she could see it often, to remind her how great it had been. She even convinced Enza to give her some of the golden starts she used for her classes to stick it in the calendar. Little by little the days with golden stars on her calendar rose and every time that Jack glanced in its direction she would smile. Of course that the fact that Enza had a someone crazy trying to end her life would result in Paul ending up naked above her and thus happened the first red cross. In that day Jack wanted to shred the thing to tiny pieces but deciding that one day she would have a paged filled with gold stars, the calendar survived her wrath. That allied to his poor control resulted in a second cross and soon her calendar had red smears ruining her perfect golden vision.

But she couldn’t exactly tell them why she had gotten the calendar or the reason behind the starts and the crosses. So when Paul teased her she almost felt grateful and had to fight the urge of smiling as she muttered a thank you.

Once they reached Paul’s house Paul asked Jack to go with him. He claimed that he had to tell everything to his mother in order to store the gnomes but in reality he was just tired of hearing his mother’s, and father’s, questions about his imprint. He figured that if they saw her they would stop and the threats of invading Enza’s and Jack’s house would finally cease.

“You told her our plan?” Jack asks with a horrified expression. “And you want me to go in there? Are you nuts?” Paul was about to answer when Jack cuts him off which made the guys laugh. “Yes, I know you are but I always tough you at least had two brain cells! You have none! And to think you thought I’d go there?” Jack cringes. Embry, that was aware of Paul’s reasons, pats Jack’s leg with a small grin on his lips.

“His mom is pretty cool. And if you don’t go Jack he won’t remove those boxes from his garage.” That made Jack sigh but Paul and Embry knew it would make Jack go with him since she wouldn’t let that prevent her from having her revenge.

“You’re coming too,” she declares holding his hand like her life depended on it.

“I’ll protect you from her,” Paul promises with a small smile receiving a glare in response. He stops the car and looks to her once again with an encouraging smile. “She won’t bite you.”

“You should be more worried with kidnap,” Embry comments and Paul hits him. That made Chester, Dave and Ryan look to him in an odd manner trying to figure out what was happening. Jack, in the other hand, cringed again and increased the strength of her grip. “I’m joking. C’mon Jack you’ve faced bigger monsters than this and you won and even ate marshmallows in the end!”

“What?” Ryan asks loudly confused by his choice of words.

“If it helps we can have marshmallows later,” Embry tells her ignoring Ryan.

“Promise?” Jack raises her head and looks to Embry’s eyes. He smiles brightly and nods his head and with that she, Embry and Paul leave the car.

“Don’t you think it’s odd that they suddenly get along?” Ryan asks once they reach Paul’s door. He narrows his eyes to the Paul’s figure and clenches his fists.

“I wouldn’t say that they get along,” Dave muses. “Jack tolerates him.”

“Our Jack doesn’t tolerate anything she hates,” Chester declares. “He must have done something really good for her change of behavior. Either way it’s her call. If he harms her we’ll break his bones, if not we should be happy that she had that beast on her side.”

“Are you forgetting that he wanted to fuck her?” Ryan raises his tone with anger.

“You’re just jealous,” Dave utters under his breath.

“Dude, Jack is capable of deciding stuff alone. If she wants to give him a chance we will too,” Chester says sternly. “And don’t forget that she would tell us if she needed help.” Ryan raises an eyebrow and scoffs. “Maybe she wouldn’t but we would be able to tell by her behavior, Ryan. And if you started to pay attention to things other than how cute she looks when she bashes her eyelashes you would see that she kind of trusts him. She wasn’t all tensed up like the last time we saw them together, she was relaxed. Something happened and since we don’t know what we’ll have to trust her, okay?”

“She used to tell me everything,” Ryan mumbles crossing his arms over his chest.

“She only did that because she knew you wouldn’t act before her approval,” Dave states. “Anyway this conversation is annoying me. What do you think about that chick, Jane? She’s an odd one,” Dave mumbles with a smirk. “And odd ones are always kinky in bed.”

~*~

“Please call me Lucy,” Paul’s mother says with a wide smile on her lips.

“Mr. Lahote makes me feel like an old man,” he laughs lightly and hugs his wife that was still looking to Jack. “If it’s not much to ask call me Sean.”

“Sure.” Jack looks to Embry that had an amused expression on his face and then to Paul that seemed as horrified as her.

“Do you want something to drink dear?” His mother asks with an eager tone of voice.

“No thank you Mr-- Lucy,” Jack mumbles correcting herself in time.

“Now we have to go get the boxes,” Paul says which made Lucy’s and Sean’s smile turn into a frown.

“We just met Jack son,” his father states making Paul groan. “Can we at least hear the story behind the prank?”

“You didn’t--”

“I didn’t tell them everything, just that it was a prank,” Paul tells her quickly interrupting her question.

“Please tell us,” Mrs. Lahote pleads pulling Jack to the living room. “Paul told me you like cookies so I have a bunch,” she adds. “I also have cake.”

“Paul?” Jack shots him a puzzled look as his mother drags her away and he simply shrugs.

“You and mom are scaring her,” Paul mutters looking to his father that seemed rather happy.

“It’s your fault. You should have brought her sooner son. You also didn’t mention how beautiful she was. Our grandkids--”

“Dad!” Paul almost yells and Embry starts laughing at his horror. “She barely likes me as it is, if she catches those crazy conversations.” Paul cringes and shakes his head. “It’s too soon to think about kids. Try again when I’m thirty.”

“I’m going to take the boxes to the car,” Embry says after a chuckle. “Try to be quick.”

“I’ll get her and we’re out of here,” Paul tells him and walks to the living room and his father. He smiled when he noticed that Jack’s shyness had disappeared and that she was chatting happily with his mother.

“What a terrible young woman,” Mrs. Lahote.

“She’s a hag,” Jack corrects her nibbling one of the cookies. “It’s Paul’s fault,” she says once she sees him entering the living room.

“Completely,” Mrs. Lahote agrees with a small smile.

“It’s not. And I said I was sorry,” Paul mumbles defensively.

“It is because you slept with Jaws and your apology is an admission of guilt,” Jack states with a smirk.

“Our son used to have a thing to dumb, big breasted girls,” Mr. Lahote comments.

“We’re going now. Thank you for turning my parents against me,” Paul utters faking anger as he picks Jack’s hand.

“They’re nice intelligent people therefore they had to be on my side,” Jack smirks and gets up from the arm chair. Jack looks to Mrs. and Mr. Lahote and smiles. “Thank you for the cookies and for storing the gnomes.”

“It wasn’t a problem darling. I’m sorry for the attack,” Mrs. Lahote says with a warm smile on her lips.

“I’m glad that you and your cousin are recovering well,” Mr. Lahote adds.

“It was quite terrible. Paul can stay with you for as long as you need.”

“Goodbye mom.” Paul says loudly pulling Jack with him.

“Come back soon!” Mr. Lahote yells.

“They’re… nice,” Jack says with amusement.

“They are,” he agrees and smiles.

“We should take some of those cookies with us,” Jack tells him once they enter the garage. “Jared and the guys will probably get hungry.”

“I’ll get them then. If you got back my mother might not release you.” Jack laughs at his words thinking that he was joking when in fact he was being serious.

Once they returned to car Ryan, Chester and Dave complained about the time they took to return. To shut them up Jack shove the cookies that Paul had brought onto their hands and smiled.

Jared was near Jaws house, leaning against a tree with a bored expression waiting for Jack and Paul. As soon as he hears the sound of the engine of the car he narrows his eyes. When the car stops he walks to the door next to Jack and opens her door glaring.

“Care to tell me why I’m freezing my ass while I could be in Kim’s warm bed?” Jared utters and pokes Jack’s forehead.

“Kim told me that her bed wasn’t availed tonight.” Jack smirks and gets out of the car to hug him. “She also told me that you were at my disposal monkey bun.”

“Thanks for clearing that out then, hunny pot,” Jared replies with a grin.

“I told you to stop with the silly pet names,” Paul grunts with annoyance looking to Jack and Jared that had accomplice smiles, which made Embry laugh loudly.

“And we decided to ignore your words. Ain’t that right monkey bun?” Jack looks to Jared that nodded.

“That’s right hunny pot,” Jared smiles brightly. “We decided that in our last meeting.”

“You won’t introduce us?” Chester asks Jack with amusement.

“Jared these are my incredible friends: Chester, Dave and Ryan.” Jack points to them as she says their names and they all mumble a hello. “This is Jared my BFF.”

“Hey, I thought I was your BFF,” Embry interjects with his arms crossed over his chest.

“My heart has love enough to all of you,” Jack tells him with a grin. “Well, maybe not that much since we have to rule Paul out.” She adds making him groan.

“And jaws,” Embry states making Jack’s smirk grow.

“Yes. So, can we give these poor gnomes a home now?”

~*~

“Henry,” Jack calls him with a smooth tone of voice and a small smile on her lips as soon as she enters the kitchen where everyone was.

“You want penis, don’t you?” Henry asks with a smirk. His words provoked different reactions in the people around them. Enza, Sasha and Yvette laughed loudly and soon Chester joined them. Ryan shook his head reprovingly with a small smile on his lips. Embry blushed and hid his face on his hands, wishing he was somewhere else on that moment. Felix and Jane looked to Jack then to Henry trying to decipher what was going on and obtaining no responses. And Paul groaned and glared.

“I thought you were gay,” Paul mumbles. Then he moves his attention to Jack that was holding back a laugh and narrows his eyes. “Are you trying to tease me again?”

“Honey I can prove you how gay I am,” Henry offers wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. Yvette laughs and slaps his arm playfully.

“Joshua won’t be happy.”

“Henry please,” Dave pleads with a slightly terrified expression. “For the love of all that’s holly don’t give her the penis.” On that moment everyone apart from Jane and Paul, who still didn’t understand the conversation, laughed.

“But I like his penises,” Jack whines childishly once she stops laughing.

“He has more than one?” Jane asks with a surprised tone of voice that made everyone laugh again. “I thought he was… human…”

“Your friend can check my penis to see if it’s human enough,” Henry mumbles winking his eye to Felix that laughed. “He can even play with--”

“Don’t go there,” Embry pleads as his blush increases.

“Henry, don’t traumatize him anymore,” Yvette chimes in with a smirk. “If you want we can go to another division and I can show you--”

“Yvette!” Henry calls her with a reproving expression. “Why are you allowed to have fun when I can’t?”

“You have fun with Joshua,” She replies.

“Yvette.” Henry says her name narrowing his eyes slightly.

“Henry.” Yvette says his name with the same expression.

“Yvette.”

“Jack!” Dave yells making everyone look at him.

“What?”

“I just needed to stop that,” he mumbles awkwardly making everyone laugh.

“So you yell her name?” Ryan asks looking to him with an odd expression. “You could have said stop… It would have the same effect.”

“They wouldn’t listen,” Dave counters.

“I tuoi amici sono così sciocco,” Enza tells Jack shaking her head lightly.

“Like yours are better,” Jack mumbles with a grin.

“They don’t yell my name randomly,” Enza states.

“Well honey, that time that we were on the beach with alcohol and the police came Sasha yelled your name,” Henry points out with amusement.

“That was different,” Sasha says defensively. “And I clearly remember I said more than her name.”

“You did.” Enza laughs loudly at the memory.

“What did she say?” Felix asks with curiosity.

“Look Enza is coming out of the water naked officer,” Yvette tells him making everyone laugh.

“And we got away with everything,” Sasha says after a while. “It was a brilliant plan.”

“I wouldn’t say brilliant,” Enza comments.

“Shut up. He bought us breakfast and invited you for coffee,” Sasha points out.

“You were teenagers and he was old which makes him a pedophile,” Jack muses looking to Enza. “Damn you really do attract pe--”

“Penis cookies,” Embry almost shouts trying to prevent Jack from ending the sentence. Once he realized what he had just done he blush five different shades of red.

“Dirty mind,” Jack mumbles with a smile.

“I like the sound of that,” Yvette says passing her hand in Embry’s arm.

“Gross.”

“Let them have fun Jack,” Enza tells her with a small smile. “Embry is entitled to explore as much as his heart desires.”

“As much as his penis desires,” Henry corrects Enza and nods his head approvingly. “If you ever feel adventurous I’m your man,” he adds winking his eye to Embry.

“Henry, just go bake the cookies.” Enza laughs and points to the kitchen.

~*~

Jack groans when she feels something moving next to her. She opens her eyes slowly trying to see who was responsible for walking her up and scold him. Yes, it was a him because she was sleeping in her bedroom with all of her friends and they were all males.

She rubs her right eye and yaws as she sees Paul trying to remove his arm under her head. She cringes when she realizes that they had slept next to each other, and that his left arm was serving as her pillow while his left arm was around her waist holding her closer. Her eyes quickly roam the room to make sure that no one had witness the way they slept and sighed in content when she realized that everyone was still sleeping.

“We slept like this?” she whispers trying not to wake anyone. Paul stopped moving and looks to her.

“Yes,” Paul simply answers with a bright smile on his lips. “You crawled here complaining about Dave’s snores and blacked out.”

“How did we end up like… like this,” Jack mumbles moving her hand above them.

“You must have been cold. You know that you talk in your sleep?” Paul asks her slightly amused.

“If you say that I professed my love for you, I know that you’re lying.”

“You didn’t say anything that dramatic,” Paul says after a chuckle. “You called Embry a pervert and ordered me to kill the clowns. Then you said you were warm and that warm was good, that was the part where you rubbed your face in my chest.”

“Clowns?” Jack mumbles with a smile. She was aware that Paul’s arms were still under and above her respectively but on that moment it didn’t seem that terrible.

“The clowns must have been really terrifying or ugly. You seemed quite mad at it.” Paul chuckles again. He moves his hand to Jack’s face and removes the straws of hair that were in front of her eyes.

“Most clowns are ugly. Anyway why are we up?”

“I have to go on patrol,” Paul tells her and waits for her rude comment but none came. Jack was simply looking to the ceiling.

“When are you coming back?” She asks him gently.

“So you want me to come back,” Paul replies with a cheesy grin.

“Don’t push your luck Lahote,” Jack mumbles with smirk. “I own you.”

“I know you do. I think I’ll be here by three. I still have to go to Sam’s house and to mine.”
“Okay then.” Jack lifts her head freeing Paul’s arm. He smiles and kisses the top of her head before getting up.

“Try to go back to sleep.” I Love you, he added on his mind.

“I’ll try,” she mumbles and pulls the blankets till her chin was covered.

It seemed that only a second had passed when she felt someone shaking her shoulders. Jack groans and turns to the other side of the mattress, burying her head beneath the blankets. But whoever was shaking her didn’t give up and continued.

“What?” Jack half yells with annoyance tossing the blanket to one side.

“It’s time for lunch,” Chester tells her sweetly trying to calm down her crankiness. “Enza asked me to wake you up. I tried to give you as much time as I could.”

“What time it is?” Jack asks stretching her arms.

“Almost three,” Chester replies and offer his hand to her to help her getting up. “You really were tired…”

“Putting gnomes in a garden isn’t as easy as it seems.” Jack smiles and accepts his hand. Once she was up she started glancing in every direction to find her shoes but quickly gave up. “What have you guys did while I was in dream land?”

“We laughed our asses off. Dave was hitting on Jane and she wasn’t giving in to his charm.” Chester laughs loudly. “She’s an odd chick, I tell you that.”

“She’s alright,” Jack declares with a smirk.

“She told him that she would suck all of his blood if he didn’t shut up.” That made Jack widen her eyes and Chester chuckled at her expression. “A weird thing to say, right?” He adds believing that it was what she was thinking. But little did he know that Jane was probably dead serious and give the fact that she was a vampire she would easily accomplish her threat.

“He stopped after that right?” When Chester shook his head Jack horror increased.

“He told her that he would let her suck everything that she wanted. I think that Jane was about to do something because the next thing that happens is Felix grabbing her arm and Enza yelling something in Italian.” Chester makes a pause and laughs again. “I don’t know what Enza said but they both left the house and I haven’t seen them ever since.”

“It’s probably for the best,” Jack comments with relieve.

“I hope that they are at the dinner because I want to laugh more.”

“I believe that in the end no one would laugh,” Jack mumbles. “Hello. Henry why are you naked?” Jack yells covering her eyes.

“Go put some clothes on Henry,” Enza yells from the kitchen. “Te l'ho detto già che non si può camminare nudo in casa! Sei peggio di un bambino ...”

“Someone hid my clothes Enza,” Henry whines. “Trust me Enza, I would like nothing more than to be wearing clothes right now. My penis looks like a peanut.”

“We eat here!” Jack yells and begins to walk away with her eyes till covered. She bumps into someone and they both fell. “Please tell me it’s not Henry!”

“It’s me,” Ryan mumbles. “Why is every—Argh. Henry!” Ryan yells horrified.

“Everyone is over reacting. It’s just me,” Henry says sternly. “Now uncover your eyes and help me look for my clothes.”

“Henry, go check in the bedroom,” Enza tells him walking into the kitchen. She removes her apron without any signs of embarrassment and hands it to Henry. “Cover yourself meanwhile.”

“I already checked in the bedroom.” Henry looks to Jack that was still next to Ryan in the ground and kicks her leg. “It’s just Uncle Henry, you can look…”

“Don’t do that to her,” Enza says and laughs. “You know she hates it when you do the uncle thing. I imagine it can only be worse when you’re naked.”

“That’s right.” Jack agrees.

“Everyone is making me feel so uncomfortable,” Henry mumbles as he dresses the apron. “I’m handso-- You!” He yells once Sasha and Yvette enter the house. “Where did you hide my clothes?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about honey,” Yvette declares with a smirk.

“Yvette please give him his clothes. I’m traumatized already… He was dangling his peanut around the table and we eat there. Are you aware that the image of that will never, ever, going again? I’m suffering here!” Jack shouts with a panicked voiced that made Sasha, Yvette and Enza laugh. “This isn’t funny!”

“I’m the one suffering here,” Henry states. He crosses the hands over his chest and narrows his eyes. “It’s cold and I’m feeling self-conscious because of their reactions.” He kick Jack’s leg one again. “Not tell Uncle Henry that he’s handsome.”

Yvette only told Enza where she and Sasha had hidden Henry’s clothes fifteen minutes later. Mainly because Embry, Paul, Leah and Seth arrived and they got a bit horrified with the odd scene. Leah tried to joke about it, commenting that Enza’s friend had her whore-mones however every time that Henry shifted the weight from his other foot she catch a glimpse of his intimate parts she stopped and turn her body till she was facing the wall feeling uncomfortable.

After lunch everyone move to the living room to watch a movie till it was time for them to go to Alice’s house.

Sasha and Yvette began arguing loudly about who would be the first one to use the bathroom when Henry entered it and closed the door. His mad laughs only stopped when he heard their threats of hiding his clothes once again. On the other room Jack and the boy took turns after deciding that ten minutes was more than enough for a shower. Jack was the first and Dave the second begging followed by Chester and Ryan.

Surprisingly enough Jack was the first one to join Enza downstairs.

“Enza?” Jack calls her gently. Enza was looking to the window and seemed deep in though.

“That was fast,” Enza tells her with a small smile on her lips. “You look pretty.” She comments looking to the clothes that Jack was wearing.

“I always look pretty,” Jack mumbles with a smirk running the hands down the silky fabric of her shirt. “Do you believe that she even got me underwear?”

“Typical,” Enza says after a laugh.

“It’s pretty I give her that. But it kind of itches,” Jack tells Enza scratching her hip.

“What itches?” Paul asks coming out of the kitchen.

“Jack’s pretty underwear… Maybe she could show you,” Enza shares with him. Jack narrowed her eyes and slapped her arm. They move their attention to Paul because of the lack of response from his part. He had his eyes slightly squinted as if he was trying to see trough the fabric of her clothes.

“Pervert!” Jack yells and Enza starts laughing.

“I just got here. It’s not polite to call your favorite gay uncle that,” Henry states feigning a hurt tone of voice.

“You are her only gay uncle,” Enza points out.

“Minor detail, ” Henry says dismissively.

Once everyone was ready they all walked to the cars. After a brief discussion of who would drive the second car that Jack won they all drove to the Cullen’s household. The decoration around the house was similar to the one that Alice had used on the first party she threw for Enza and Jack. Several lights were hanging in the trees lighting a path to the house. They even had removed all the snow from the beginning to the road till the door. There was also a large portion of the pavement without snow that they assumed that would be where they’d park the cars.

“No lights on the roof this time?” Jack mumbles looking to the roof.

“Focus on the road!” Chester yells tapping the seat.

“You’ll see the lights on the roof when you get out of the car,” Embry tells her calmly. “They are red.”

“Yes, I can see a red glow,” Jack says.

“The road, focus on it!”

“I’m a good driver!” Jack states with annoyance.

“Tell that to the animals you killed,” Dave mutters under his breath. Jack tried to hit him and Paul slapped her arm gently.

“Hit him when we stop,” Paul tells her making her groan.

“I want him to suffer now,” Jack whines childishly.

“Wow. This house is amazing… How did they manage to put the lights on the roof?” Ryan asks with amazement.

“Alice is a bit excessive…” Jack laughs and remembers the words that Embry said to her on first visit. “Wait till you see the inside.”