I Wish I Could Float Away.

“I'm not okay,” I looked up into Alex's face. He looked as though he'd been crying, I debated hugging him but I decided that would make me seem like a creep. What can I say? Creepers gon' creep!
“Can you take a break?” He nodded. “Come sit with me, I won't tell anyone anything, I'll just listen, Zack says it's the only thing I'm good for other then scoring him chicks,” I could have swore I saw a slight grin spread over his depressed looking features. He seemed to perk up slightly then looked back at the floor.
“I-I can't, Not here! There are too many people! Have you even thought about that!? You know nothing about me and you think you can help me!?” I grimaced slightly as he snapped at me. I saw him regret it instantly.
“Alex, why don't you come with me back to my place. Zack and Rian, my other room mate, are going out later. You can just... kick around with us until they leave then decide whether you need a friend to... Just... Talk to I guess,” I shrugged my shoulders then sent him a goofy grin. “And we have alcohol and Zack's a lightweight, he's also a funny drunk,”

I saw, who I presumed, to be Alex and Zack's boss approach us, he looked the professional kind of guy. Well if you ignore the Mickey Mouse socks.
“Alex, I said you can leave,” He looked at me and grinned, the concerned look he'd had when he was talking to Alex had disappeared. Alex looked at me and closed his eyes for a few seconds.
“I'll come with you,” He whispered lightly. I'd barely even registered his agreement as I was walking out of the doors with him. I could feel Zack's eyes watching us as we left.

The small talk on the way back home was minimal I found out he was two years older then me and he lived on his own but occasionally his friend Sierra stayed with him. I told him most of the things I could think of about me. Mainly just random things like I haven't had a job in three year and I'm living off Rian. When we walked into the living room I found Rian sleeping on the sofa. I made the motion to Alex to be quiet and he nodded creeping silently behind me. I jumped over the back of the sofa and landed square on top of Rian's stomach. He yelled out and tried to hit me but I climbed off him before he could grab me.
“Good afternoon Robert,” He groaned. “Just kidding Ri, this is Alex by the way,” I pulled him forward by the wrist. “Alex this is my room mate, father figure and walking bank Rian,” I watched as Rian held his hand up as a hello and Alex nodded silently.
“Can I go back to sleep now?” I rolled my eyes behind his back. “Wait! Why don't we show him our shuttlecocks?” Alex looked at me bewilderedly. I felt a hand on my shoulder.
“Show him your golf balls while your at it,” Zack grinned at Alex and waved slightly.
“Riiight I'll totally do THAT,” I shook my head. “We're going to my room laters freaks!” I waltzed out of the room with Alex behind me I led him upstairs and opened the door to my room motioning for him to come in. I watched as he admired one of my many posters from concerts.
“Um, Jack?” I turned and looked at him. He was biting his lip nervously. “What did they mean by shuttlecocks and golf balls? It uh, it sounded kind of-” I grinned and started to laugh at his nervousness.
“Well Rian plays badminton and I play golf,” I replied between my laughter.
“Oh, right,” I smiled at him and flopped down onto my bed.
“So, do you want to sit and talk about the whole, 'I'm not okay' thing?” HI patted the spot next to where I was lying and I felt him sit on the complete other end. “Rian and Zack are going out for drinks in a bit so we'll be alone, I would have suggested we go with them but I'm too lazy,” I grinned at my ceiling.

I don't know what it is about him but I feel comfortable around him and I can be myself.
“N-not really,” I sighed as he continued to speak, I watched as he grabbed his arm and squeezed it gently. Was it something I said? “I don't want to be alone though,” He shuffled in his seat slightly “Even it it's with someone I barely know,” He looked up at the ceiling and then back at me. “Like you I guess,”
“I don't bite you know?” I grinned as I watched him shuffle further away. “Well, not unless there's a girl in my bed and protection on my head,” He frowned at me but he lay down next to me and looked up at the ceiling.

There was a long pause before I sighed. “So are you going to tell me why you're not okay or are you just going to lie there and look at my ceiling like a kiwi?”
“I like kiwi's, I'd prefer to be a kiwi,” He looked like he was going to cry. “What do you want to know? Did Zack put you up to this? He's always bugging me at work! And you two are friends,”
“No of course he didn't!” I sat up quickly. Fuck. What was that Harry Potter thing again? I must not tell lies? “Why would he? I mean, I just want to help you, you deserve a chance to speak your mind and shit,” I played with my hands in my laps.
“Well, I don't like speaking my mind Jack,” He sat up as well and looked me in the eye before shifting his gaze to the floor. “Not since Thom-” His eyes were watering and a few silent tears fell from his eyes.
“Alex,” I whispered his name and tried to comfort him, “It's okay, you don't have to tell me but it might help?” I suggested feebly. He lay back down on my bed.
"Well, it started in high school I guess. Something set something off in my brain and I spiraled into manic depression, and I've had it since," He paused trying to find the courage within him, He reminded me of the cowardly lion from the wizard of oz. "My brother Tho-Thomas, He k-He k-killed himself two years a-ago, tur-urns out he had it to, but he was too b-busy looking after me to get help," His eyes were streaming now and I just wanted to gather him up and let him snuggle into my arms. "I-It's all my f-fault Ja-ack, if I'd hav-ve noticed i-it then he'd still be he-here," I went with my instinct and hugged him close into my body, I felt him snuggle his head under my chin and his small arms wrapped around my waist.
“Shh, Alex, It's okay. You're not exactly feeling fabulous right now. You need a haircut by the way,” I spat the strands of his hair that had made their way into my mouth.
“Like I'm in any state to get one!” He gripped tighter onto my shirt and I squeezed him gently. “But it is my fault jack, I-I burdened him! He had to look after me! He didn't even know he had it! It crept up on him!” He sobbed into my shoulder.

After a few minutes of crying he buried his head into my chest and sighed. He looked as though the weight of the world had been lifted off his shoulders.
“Thank you Jack, Just, Thank you,” I smirked.
“For what? And just as a warning if you say it's all your fault again, I will shave off your hair and you'll look like Rian forever! And no one wants THAT!” He giggled slightly.
“Listening to me,” He smirked. “And do you really think I'd let you ruin my good looks?” He rolled his eyes. “Honestly! Some people!”
“Who said I was paying any attention at all?” He looked down and moved out of my arms where he'd clearly just realised he was still in. “And we both know I could tackle you to the floor right now, I mean seriously dude!?”
“A little girl could tackle me and I'd be out!” He jokingly pinched my arm and I put on a deeply offended face. “But I guess you're the same thing”
“I'll ignore that comment, Wanna get a pizza to share? I'm hungry,” My stomach rumbled and alex laughed. He looks like an owl.
“Not hungry,” he muttered and looked down. There was an awkward silence.
“B-but pizza,” I pouted. I jumped off the bed and got down on my knees, I began to beg. “PLEASE ALEX! EAT WITH ME!” He sighed.
“Fine, but you're paying,” He climbed off my bed and chucked his hoodie on my desk.
“I'm unemployed, can we go 60/40?” I winked. “I'll pay you back, but not in cash, The girls I fuck say I'm amazing,” I watched the blush spread to his cheeks.
“You're bi?” He seemed nervous. “We'll go 60/40 but you'll probably eat most of it, like I said, I'm not really that hungry,” He bit his lip nervously. Cute. I grinned at him.
“Are you calling me fat?”
“No! You're pretty skinny from what I can see!” He blushed again. “That came out wrong...” I pulled off my hoodie and chucked it on the floor.
“Are you asking for a striptease Alex?” I winked at him as he shook his head. “I'm going to steal Zack's phone, he always leaves it around where his poor best friend can find it,”
“No, no striptease!” He grinned “I-I'll get some cash ready,”
“Plain cheese and tomato okay? I was kidding by the way,” He sighed as I left, I spied on him through the keyhole and saw him lie back on my bed. I watched as he closed his eyes and curled into my pillow, I could have sworn he sniffed it.

I found Zack's phone on the counter and dialled the number for pizza hut. I placed the order and bounced up the stairs to check on Alex.