I Wish I Could Float Away.

I wish I had the courage to jump, give everything I had to the jaws of death, just like Thomas had, but something was stopping my legs move a few inches further over the ledge. There was always something holding people back, wasn't there?

"Deep breaths Alex, you can do this," I told myself, following my own instructions, my eyes closing softly. I opened them again, looking down into the water below me, swirling and dancing across the surface. It was calling me. A sudden gust of wind sent the water crashing into the rocky cliff, spraying me with small water droplets, weighing me down; trying to tug me to the deep water below.

I stood for a few minutes, thinking about everything, my eyes fixated on my soon-to-be watery grave.

What would mom think? Her only surviving son, killing himself like her other, and father, he would be ashamed. He was already, though, everyone was. Who wanted to be associated with Alex Fucking Gaskarth, the kid who was the first to come out of the closet. The kid with a dead brother. The kid with manic depression. No one. No one.

Alex Gaskarth has never felt more alone, even with the company of his closest friend, Sierra. Sierra is worried, something has to be able to get Alex right again, or someone. She can't always be around to stop Alex from doing things she knows runs through his head daily, he'll end up hurting himself somehow.

Jack Barakat is king of the party scene, he fucks chicks left and right, and don't forget boys too. He loves his life, and he loves his friends. Nothing could be more perfect in his life, well, maybe his life could be better, he just hasn't figured that part out yet.

When the two meet by chance, Jack seems to be one of the only things that can make Alex smile, for once.