All We've Ever Known

The knock seemed to reverberate down the hall as I stood awaiting an answer. I gently pressed my ear to the door, my hearing picking up on the light footsteps quickly approaching. I pulled back just in time for the door to swing open, revealing a sweatpants clad Macy. I could tell by the glazed over look in her eyes that she hadn’t quite registered who I was yet. She looked me up and down, her mouth hung open in slight shock.

“Alex!” she finally exclaimed, throwing her arms around my neck. I staggered back as I balanced her weight, since she had hoisted herself up so her legs were wrapped around my torso. I laughed into her neck, feeling my muscles relax after weeks of not seeing her.

“What the hell are you doing here?!” she asked incredulously, kissing my neck out of excitement. I set her on the ground but kept my grip on her waist.

“I told you I was coming straight for you when tour was over,” I laughed, jerking my head to the side. Her eyes fell upon my two large suitcases at my feet, and a massive toothy grin spread across her face. “My mom picked us up from the airport and I told her to just drive me here.”

Macy cupped my face in her small hands and smiled, her piercing blue eyes never leaving mine.

“I’m really happy you came here,” she said softly, placing a gentle kiss on my lips. I deepened the kiss, my body burning with desire.

She pulled away and smiled sheepishly, muttering, “I think we should get out of the hallway…”

Nodding, I pulled her in for another tight hug. “I think you’re right.”

I carried my suitcases inside and set them in her bedroom, taking a moment to glance around the homey space.

“What are you doing?” she asked, coming up behind me.

“Nothing, I was just looking around your room!” I replied, turning around and wrapping my arms around her. She snuggled her face into the crook of my neck, exhaling heavily.

“I seriously missed you, Alex…” she sighed. “It’s hard, you know, with you being gone for so long.”

“I told you it’d be hard… Are you still okay with all of this?”

She pulled away, looking up at me with an utterly confused expression that was so cute I couldn’t take it. I let my thumb lightly trace the scar on the side of her mouth, her lips automatically tightening.

“What do you mean am I okay with all of this?” she asked. “If this is what we have to do, then I can deal with it. Why would you ask that?”

I shrugged and shimmied out of her grip. “I don’t know… I get scared sometimes that you won’t want to do this once you realize how hard it gets… Because believe me, it gets harder. Way fucking harder. You just don’t know it yet… You’ve never felt it.”

She sighed and reached up, brushing my cheek. “Alex, I’m not going anywhere. I can’t even believe you’d think that!”

She started laughing, and she immediately reached up to cover her mouth. “I’m sorry… I don’t know why I find that funny…”

I pouted, not finding it funny either. She continued once her laughter decreased and said, “It’s just, that’s normally a thought I would have, and it’s a little eye-opening to hear you say that…”

“Ha ha,” I said dryly, “so funny…”

She smiled and said, “You really have nothing to worry about… You must be hungry, though! Do you want me to order you a pizza or something?”

I raised an eyebrow and added, “Us?”

Her eyes widened slightly and she swallowed hard. “Us? What do you mean?”

“You were referring to just me… But, it’s technically dinner time for the entire east coast so… That would mean you need dinner, too.”

She nodded slowly and said, “Yeah, that’s what I meant.”

Macy exited the room, and I quickly followed her. “Mace, you’ve been doing okay, right?”

She stopped walking and turned around. “You want me to be honest?”

“Yeah, Macy! Of course!”

She shrugged and replied, “Let’s just say I have to get back on track. No one’s been home, so it’s more difficult not having someone reminding me.”

“Reminding you to eat? Yeah, really fucking hard.”

She narrowed her eyebrows at me, sending me a chilling glare. She muttered a quiet, “Fuck you,” before turning around to order the pizza.

We sat on her couch and ate it once it arrived, and I even managed to coax her to have one piece. As I ate my fourth, she nervously bit at her cuticles, her eyes darting toward the clock. I wasn’t going to let her out of me sight, since I knew she’d try everything to get rid of it.

I placed my empty plate on the table and smiled at her, my heart fluttering at a prospect I hadn’t yet considered. One where we’d have an entire house to ourselves for a couple of days.

“So your brother’s not coming home until when?” I asked, even though she had told me the answer before.

“Tueday…” she replied. I nodded slowly, letting the silence settle in. I could feel my veins thumping harder, and all I wanted was to kiss her as hard as I could.

I looked over at her, her eyes instantly locking with mine – she had never looked away in the first place. She bit her lip lightly, almost as if she was signaling that she knew what I was thinking. I leaned over and didn’t hesitate in hungrily kissing her, my heart beating at an alarming rate. She pushed me off of her and settled herself on my lap, her lips never breaking contact with mine.

The feeling of her lips alone was enough to drive me crazy, but she detached them and began hungrily kissing my neck and jaw line, sending a chill down my spine. I let my head fall back on the couch from my inability to keep it lifted, let alone even think straight, as she began moving her hips rhythmically against mine. If I had ever worried about a heart attack in my life, that was the moment I was slightly frightened. I groaned ever-so-quietly as she reattached our lips.

When our make out session had gone entirely too far for just kissing, I stood up and she wrapped her legs around my waist, her hold around my neck never loosening. I carried her into her bedroom, shutting the door and then pressing her up against it. I kissed her as hard as I had ever kissed anyone in my life, letting the lonely memories of tour creep into my mind. I never thought I could miss someone so much. I stepped back for a moment, eliciting a pained groan on her part.

“Mace, I missed you so fucking much,” I said gruffly, kissing her once. “I really did. I love you.”

She took my face in her hands and smiled. “I love you too, Alex.”

“I just want to… I just want to really enjoy this,” I said quietly, kissing her again. I kissed her in between everything I said as I muttered against her lips, “I want it to be romantic… And slow… Because we’re not on a tour bus this time.”

She laughed against my lips, kissing me back much harder. I was surprised at her enthuasiasm - she wasn’t at all anxious about us like she was the last time. There was not a trace of anxiety as she leaned up and kissed my neck, biting down softly. I pulled away for a moment, pulling my shirt up and over my head. She giggled as her hand brushed against my chest. I stepped even further away so she couldn’t touch me as I unbuckled my belt. Her eyes never left mine, and I swiftly unbuttoned my jeans and let them fall to the floor.

“What are you doing?” she said playfully, giggling again.

I only smiled and slowly approached her, my hands lifting her shirt over her head at a painstakingly slow pace. I added it to the growing pile of clothes and then went on to gently slide her sweatpants down her legs. To my advantage, she hadn’t even been wearing a bra, since she had just been lounging around the house, so I just reattached our lips, feeling her skin move against mine.

I gently swept her off the ground and over to her bed, laying her down against her pillows. She hungrily kissed me, her hands moving down my sides. I shuddered with anticipation, but resisted that urgent need and I softly kissed the two scars on her face, moving down her body kissing every scar I could until I got to her legs. She groaned in anticipation as I kissed a scar on the innermost part of her thigh.

“Alex,” she said breathlessly, her eyes silently pleading with me.

I wrapped my fingers around the waistband of her underwear and slid them very slowly down her legs, moving back up to that spot on her thigh and turning to spend some time where she wanted me to the most. Her fingers laced themselves in my hair, pulling at the roots slightly. She laid her head back on the pillows as her breathing increased, the moans falling from her mouth at a faster pace. After a few moments, she pulled my face up to hers and kissed my lips roughly, her passion overflowing. She quickly slid my boxers down my legs and I pushed them off and on to the floor. I chuckled lightly at her intense enthusiasm, which earned a glare.

“Please, Alex… I don’t like to be teased,” she said, her eyebrows furrowing.

I smiled and replied, “I know you don’t.”

I kissed her neck as she reached down and gently ran her fingers down the length of me.

“Shit…” I muttered through my teeth.

I quickly replaced her hand with mine and gently pushed into her, my forehead falling against hers out of pure pleasure. I never broke eye contact with her as my pace quickened, her eyes quickly falling closed once her breathing spiked.

It was cheesy to say that I had never felt the same with any other girl, but Macy had this unexplained, unexpected passion lying deep beneath the surface of herself that any guy would be lucky to experience. She seemed to move her hips in just the right way, kiss me in just the right places, and make just the right noises to literally send me crazy. Macy would forever be the girl who could always please me without even trying.

I let my head roll back as I quickened my pace even more, thrusting deeper each time. Macy’s hands grabbed at the skin of my back, since she couldn’t claw my skin because of her lack of nails. I could feel the intensity of my feelings bubbling, and I couldn’t control myself anymore once Macy had constricted around me, the moans escaping from her lips giving me goosebumps. I buried my face in the pillow, my ear directly next to hers, as my movements became sloppy. My breath came to me as if I had run a marathon as I collapsed beside her. She turned into my body, her one leg wrapping around mine as she hugged me tight, pressing her body flush against mine.

“I love you,” she whispered, more breathless than I had ever heard her before. “I really, really love you.”

The sounds of our labored breathing filled the air as I held her close to me, my body numb. I never that moment to be any different. I never wanted to go back on tour and leave her or… Go home and leave her. That thought struck me immediately with anxiety at the prospect of having to go home eventually. I knew she was only a two hour car ride away, but having to be somewhere without her directly by my side like she was at that moment was extremely difficult for me to even think about.

“Macy?” I said, my voice cracking as my breathing finally came to a normal pace.

“Hm?”

I paused for a moment before answering, “Move in with me.”

It was more of a statement than a question, since I wasn’t really saying it as an option. I wanted her to move in with me, and that was that.

She looked up and smiled saying, “What? Move in with you? We’ve only been dating for a couple of months now!”

I shrugged and countered, “So? Technically we’ve dated for a collective four years and a couple months. Besides, you’re telling me that you’d rather stay here by yourself?”

“Well, no… But my brother is nice company…”

“Mhm, so you’d rather live here with your brother?”

She paused for a moment and replied, “I suppose not… I don’t really like being away from you, and just thinking about you leaving for tour is making me sick.”

“All the more reason to move in with me. We have plenty of room too, since it’s an actual house and not a dinky apartment.”

“Hey!” she laughed. “I love my dinky apartment! But… I’d much rather live in a big house.”

“Wait, so you’ll do it? You’ll move in?”

“I suppose so, Gaskarth!” she smiled.

I grinned widely and attached my lips to hers, kissing her intensely. “I can’t tell you how happen I am.”

In one swift motion, she disentangled herself from me and hovered over me, her lips gently brushing mine. She moved her hips once, setting my body on fire once more.

She gently bit down on my earlobe and huskily muttered, “Then show me,” before she continued her insanely erotic hip movements.