Thinking of You

"John..." I couldn't believe it. He was asking me out of the blue, randomly. I felt horrible because my mind had already been made up on marriage a long time ago. "I can't."

His entire face fell and it broke my heart but my answer was final, all my life I've never wanted to get married. "Why not? We've been dating for two years, who else do you want to marry besides me?"

"No one else, but I just don't want to get married. It's not just you, I don't want to be anybody's wife," I said quickly hoping my words won’t crush him too much. Honestly I still want to be with him, I just didn't want to get married. As much as I love John it wasn't enough to change my mind, it had been set in stone for a while.

His expression changed to a frustrated smile as he ran a hand through his sandy hair, "You mean to tell me that for the past two years you have been leading me on? That you never put any thought in being more than just boyfriend and girlfriend?"

"Listen, it's not you okay! Believe me when I say that I love you, because I truly do, but I made up my mind a long time ago that marriage is something I never want to be bothered with."

John looked at me intensely; I could see the anger rising through his body and the heat surfacing to his skin. Suddenly he went inside and as tempted as I was to follow him I didn't, I rather go to bed with him mad at me then have a fight that resolved nothing and have us both pissed at each other. John walked back outside with a slam of the screen door and the keys to his truck held in his hand.

"We're going for a ride."

I watched as he stormed down the wooden steps and down to his truck that was parked on the stone driveway. Opening the passenger door he waited for me to walk over. "Get in the truck."

Crossing my arms over my chest I stayed where I was, not moving an inch, "Why?"

That pissed John off. "God damn it Valerie! Get in the truck!"

"Tell me why and maybe I will."

"Just get in the fucking truck!" He yelled, walking away from the open door and towards me instead.

"Tell me why!" I retorted, my anger breaking through. John walked up to the bottom of the stairs and before I had time to react, picked me up and through me over his shoulder. "Put me down you asshole!"

I yelled, hit him, and protested as much as I could but John only ignored me before setting me down in the cab of the truck and wrestling the seat belt over me and closing the door forcefully. Rolling my eyes I stayed put, he's already got me here so why not just see what he wants.

Sliding into the driver's seat and slamming his door closed, John put the keys in the ignition and started up his old truck. We both remained silent as he backed onto the deserted road and started to drive forward.

"I am going to continue to drive until I've changed your mind, then and only then will you be allowed to leave this truck. Understand?" I could tell by his tone he wasn't joking around, but little did he know neither was I.

Snorting, I rolled my eyes, "Hope you're prepared for me to pee on your seats then." I looked out the window and the passing houses, most of their residents fast asleep at 2:37 in the morning. Occasionally a bedroom light would be shinning proudly though it's window, cascading down to the black street.

"Don't be a bitch about this," He answered, not even bothering to look at me.

"As soon as you're done being a cock sucker."

Silence fell for a couple more minutes, both of us too stubborn to say something to each other even though we both wanted to. Finally John turned down a normally busy highway that was almost bare this late at night.

"Don't think not talking is going to get you home any faster because I can tell you right now princess it isn't. Whenever you are ready to explain yourself I'll be here waiting." A couple more moments of silence and John started fiddling with the radio, trying to find a station worth listening to.

I decided to ignore his suggestion and continue to look out the window. If I was going to talk I will when I'm damn ready to.