Humans, Are Such Nasty Things

"She did?" A woman's voice said.
"Yeah, straight in the face," This voice sounded familiar. Alice?
"And her arm is fine?" this was the woman.
"Yeah, not a thing wrong with it. It's pretty weird," Rosalie, maybe?
"That dog Sam was the one who got messed up," Could this voice be Emmet?
"Gwen sent him on his knees. One glare at Paul and he had is tail between his leg," Alice again.
"You're joking!" The woman said, "There's no way a human could have such a hold over them like that!"
"Gwen, just what exactly is she," Rosalie mused.
"And what the hell do they want with her?! Fucking werewolf," Emmet scoffed.

Werewolf. What the - ?

I stirred myself awake. Blinked a few times then realized that I had no clue where I was.
"Where the fuck am I?" I groaned to no one in particular.
"Ah, you're awake," Alice said looking up from her book and skipping over to me, "And to answer your question, your at my house. We've kidnapped you!"

I looked around. I was sitting on the white beautifully soft couch in a classy looking white room, staring at a big-ass T.V. There was one of those big glass doors that over looked the forest and a French spiral staircase and a grand piano that was, of course white. Around the room was about four different painting. My favourite one was a surreal one where two boys were sitting on a giant fish emerging from the water while fishing for rocks.

"Nice place you got here," I said.
"Thanks," a woman's voice said. She sounded just like the woman from the weird dream I had.

I looked to the kitchen and saw a beautiful woman with golden eyes and a heart-shaped face curtained by auburn hair come towards me with a HUGE slice of strawberry cake and milk.

"Here," she said putting it in front of me, "I've been dying for someone new to try it out on. I'm Esme by the way"
"Thanks, I'm Gwendelyn, but you can call me Gwen." I said somewhat awkwardly taking a big fork of it. I paused in shock when I swallowed.
"So, how is it?" Esme asked.
"It's so good!" I said greedily scarfing it down. When I reached the last bite, which was in no time at all, I realized Alice and Esme were giggling at me.

I scoffed silently to myself and picked up the glass of milk with distinction and lady-likeness.
"Look who finally woke up!" Emmet slapped my shoulder almost making the milk spill.
"DAH!" I said almost failing to balance the glass, "Be careful!"
"Honestly Emmet," Esme sighed, "bothering Gwen just moment after she woke up."
"Aw c'mom Esme!" Emmet leaned on the couch, "I'm just messing with her. And she doesn't mind it. Right Gwen?"
I merely took a sip of the milk.

"We did a pretty good job though didn't we Alice?" Rosalie said popping out of nowhere.
"She looks amazing!" Alice beamed.
"What are you two talking about?" I said.
"You haven't showed her yet?" Emmet said.
"I want everyone to see her reaction," Alice said.
"Yeah, and I want to know what you guys are talking about," I said impatiently.
"Take a look," Alice said handing me a small golden frame.

In it, a beautiful girl with short dark brown shiny hair was staring at me. Her snow-white face was small and serious looking. Her lips were pink and her eye-lids had golden shimmering eye-shadow that almost looked like smoke. Black, long, full eyelashes framed her amethyst eyes which were hidden behind small glasses. Well she's cute.

"Is this your cousin or something Alice?" I said then was bewildered as the picture moved her lips when I did.
"What the?" I dragged the picture closer to me, "No way! Shit like this only happens in Harry Potter!"
I heard Esme, Emmet and Rosalie tried to suppress their giggles.
"Wait a sec," I said, "It's a mirror. This is me isn't it?"
Rosalie and Emmet burst out in laughter.
"I don't know if I should feel embarrassed for you for not recognizing yourself, or proud of myself for not making you recognize yourself," Alice sighed.
"B-but how d-did you even d-do this amount of - ?" I stuttered then looked down at myself.

I was wearing a white flowing dress that stopped at my knees with big blues irises and sky blue ribbon around my waist that was in a big bow at the the side. On my feet were these cutesy HIGH zebra print wedges and around my wrists were golden bracelets with hearts and flowers. (= .=')

"More importantly, HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET ME TO WEAR THIS?! AND WHY IS THERE A BIRD IN MY HEAD?!" I SAID.
"Oh get over it, YOU LOOK SO CUTE!" Rosalie said fixing my hair, "And it's just a few feathers, not the whole peacock."
"I feel so soo -" I said groaning looking on my perfect french tips in horror.
"I think the word you're looking for is 'feminine'," Emmet joked.

"Hmph!" Alice crossed her arms, "Not even a 'thank you Alice for making me look so cute',"
"You! You did this to me?" I said.
"Mostly," she gave me a side-ways look.
"And I went along willingly?!"
"Ha!" she laughed, "It was hard enough to get you in any colour other than black and red much less a dress! You didn't want any alter-backs or sleeveless, and I bet you would look even more cute in them."
'Well yes,' I thought to myself, 'after all, my blue marks had to be hidden.'

"I'm more concerned as to why you don't remember anything," Esme said.
"My mind is a blank canvas when I wake up, I probably won't remember anything for the next few minutes," I said, "Well I hate to eat and leave, but I really should be checking in on my sister."
"Oh that's fine dear," Esme said, "I was speaking with Carlisle a bit before you woke up. She, Edward and Jasper are chatting."
"Well at least Jasper and Carlisle are there," I sighed, "knowing Edward, he'll probably bombard Nandaleah with unnecessary questions."

"Damn, you really hate Edward don't you," Emmet said.
"Why though?" Alice asked.
"I don't even know! And that pisses me off even more," I strained to control my irritation, oh the very thought of that guy, "Ever since I've seen him smile that cocky bastard smile like he knows everyone's goddamn business! Urgh! It just gets to me!"
Esme giggled.
I shut up because I realized that I was talking about her son.

I heard my phone ringing from somewhere. I instinctively patted my sides. Oh that's right, no pockets.
"Here," Alice said handing me my bedazzled phone ---_---' (oh well at least it's white, black and red), "But it's only the number it doesn't say who."
"That's fine," I said taking the phone, recognizing the number and walking over to the glass door. I answered it.

"Hi dad," I said.
"GWENDELYN! HOW ARE YA?!" a man's loud voice boomed in my ears, "HEY FELLAS! YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE WHOSE ON THE PHONE! IT'S GWENDELYN!"

There was loud, raucous laughter and cheering from men. Yeah, he was out drinking again.

"Hey Toots serve up another round," Orville's slurred then vomited. A few of the men who he was with laughed and made comment about his inability to keep his alcohol down.
"Ah fuck you guys," he groaned then gulped, "So Gwen how ya doing? Still got those devil eyes?"
"Yeah dad, those types of things don't just go away," I said.
"So what d'you call me for? Need more money? The Jag wasn't enough for you?" He spat.
"You called me dad," I said.
"OH I DID!" He laughed, shocked, with his drunk friend for almost a whole minute.
"Oh what world full of fuck-tards," He calmed down a bit, "Ain't that right Dick?"
"Damn straight," Dick guffawed.

"Well how's my little baby doing?" He said still slurring.
"I'm fine dad," I said.
"NOT YOU!" He exploded, "WHO THE FUCK CARES ABOUT YOU, YOU LITTLE, BWAH HA HA HA! AH! ANOTHER ROUND TOOTS! Here's a fifty, buy yourself something pretty."
"No Gwen, not YOU," He chuckled, "Nandaleah, how is she? How's my little angel? Is she doing fine? Is she better yet?"
"No not yet. But she's doing better. She smiling more and not getting as sick as usual," I said.
"And her legs?" he sniffed.
"No major changes,"
"WELL WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT DUCK DOCTOR DOING?! WASTING MY MONEY! THE NERVE OF THAT LITTLE QUACK! I OUGHTA MARCH OUTTA HERE AND GIVE HIM WHAT'S COMING TO HIM!" He yelled.
"Dad, you're all the way on the other side of the country," I said.
"YOU THINK THAT WILL STOP ME FROM KICKING ASS!"
I was silent and I heard him make soft sobs.

"Give her back," he cried, "First my Rachel, then my Nandaleah was taken from me."
I stayed silent, he wasn't talking to me.
"Give her back! Give me my girls back," he wailed, "Nandaleah, Rachel! OH RACHEL! I-I WANT MY RACHEL!"

"Oh crap," I heard someone else over the phone said.
"He's gone again," another said, "not coming back for now."
"This is all your fault," the first voice said.
"ME?!" A third voice say, "If we should blame anyone blame Lewis! He was supposed to be watching how much Orville drank!"
"Some friends you guys are, why should I have to stop him from his self destruction?" A fourth voice scoffed. This voice was sober.

"RACHEL! RACHEL WHERE ARE YOU?! MY RACHEL, YOU LITTLE OLD WHITE MAN UP THERE SITTING ON YOUR THRONE IN FUCKING HEAVEN, YOU TOOK MY RACHEL FROM ME! I WANT MY RACHEL! GIVE BACK MY RACHEL! AND NOW, EVEN MY OTHER RACHEL IS GONE! YOU MADE YOUR PURPLE EYED DEMON TAKE HER FROM ME! WHY? W-WHYYY?!" Orville still wailed, "LOOK HOW BEAUTIFUL THEY ARE? MY RACHELS. OH THEY'RE SO LOVELY!"

"Ah damn it all," the third voice groaned, "he took the pictures out. C'mom Orville, put their pictures up. You're making a scene."
"NO! DON"T TOUCH THEM WITH YOUR FILTHY HANDS!" Orville shouted then there was the sound of breaking glass, "Rachel, my Rachel, no one else, just mine."

"Bring in the hookers," someone groaned.
"Hey big boy, remember me?" a females sultry voice sounded.
"NOOOO!! GET OUTTA MY LAP! ONLY RACHEL CAN SIT HERE! YOU'RE NOT RACHEL!"
"Are you sure I'm not her?" she said again.
"RACHEL'S EARS WEREN'T THAT SMALL! GET OUTTA MA SIGHT BITCH!"

"What about me handsome?" another female voice said, "You can call me Rachel if you want."
"LEAVE ME BE! RACHEL'S EYES WEREN'T SUCH AN UGLY SHADE!" Orville boomed, still crying, "GO AWAY AND DIE YOU IMPOSTER! MAYBE THEN YOU'D BE MORE LIKE RACHEL!"

Poor guy. These are the rare moments where I actually feel something close to pity for him.

"NO NO NO NO! DON'T TOUCH ME!" Orville screamed then sounded like he fell on the ground.
There was a lot of grumbling and the sound of things being broken.
"RACHEL! RACHEL! MY RACHEL! MY WIFE RACHEL! GIVE HER BACK TO ME! RACHE-HEL! R-RA-RACH-E-EL! RACHEL!" I heard him bawl and gasp.

"Geez," I heard someone say close to the phone, "Don't worry Gwen we'll get that father of yours home safe."
"Thanks Lewis," I said.
"Yeah, no problem,"
CLICK!

I sighed and turned to four pairs of golden sympathetic eyes looking on me. They couldn't have heard all of that, could they?

"You guys didn't," I pointed at my phone, "hear that did you?"
Esme looked confused at first. It was as if I was speaking in a different language.

"No, no of course not," she picked up the glass and saucer, then made her way to the kitchen, "Of course not. I didn't hear a thing."

Rosalie looked away and Emmet was rubbing her hand. Alice looked on me still in sympathy. They couldn't have heard everything at that distance. I mean, yeah Orville was shouting, but I had turn down the phone volume somewhere along the line.

"Well then" I said in my normal tone, crossing my arms, "Alice, you said that you've kidnapped me, now what do you plan to do? I don't want to remain entertained forever."

At this, she smiled.