Losing Him Was Blue!

Two Weeks Later

I held tightly onto Lucia’s hand and moved her through one of the local Starbucks, when I seen Taylor Crosby sitting at a table by a window, moving her blonde hair out of her eyes. She was wearing a simple oversized blue sweater, and black skinnies.

We arranged to meet this morning, after a teary phone call last night that ended with Taylor claiming she needed to tell me something. I was nervous, because I partially thought she lost her baby.

“Hey Tay,” I sighed, sitting down in the chair across from her and unbuttoned my coat, sliding it on the back of the chair. It was now February 28th and was like bone cold outside, but I loved it. Lucia liked the snow and cold as well.

I picked her up and slid her into the complimentary high chair and broke up her cookie. “How are you doing this morning?” I removed my toque and sat it down on the table beside my coffee, moving my blonde hair with my fingers.

I let the brown fade out back to my honey blonde and I was happier as a blonde, I looked better. I left it out natural this morning, which I regretted because of the wind and now my hair was all over the place -_-

“I’m okay,” She frowned, turning her eyes on her coffee cup. “So last night, I told you… I had something I needed to tell you. I don’t know if I can… I mean, you’re going to be really mad at me,”
All the color left my face. Son of a bitch. She told Sidney?! “What is it?” I reached over and placed my fingertips over hers. “I’ll help you anyway I can, you know I would,” I saw Taylor as a little sister and regardless if Sidney and I were together or not, I was still going to be there for her.

She paused for a few long seconds, moved her eyes up to mine and I watched as the tears gathered in the corners. She sighed, letting them roll down her face. “The guy… that I got pregnant by…” She stopped. “Is your boyfriend,”

“What?” I laughed, moving my bang out of my eyes. “No. Not Claude,” I doubted it was my Claude, there had to be a bunch of other Claude’s in Philadelphia.

“Yeah it’s Claude Giroux. After you left, like 20 minutes later, he showed up and at first I’m like, he can’t be the guy? And then we got talking and yeah, he got me pregnant, your boyfriend,” She ripped her hand out of mine and sobbed into them. “I am so sorry Emily; I feel so bad that I did what I did,”

She began hysterically crying and it was attracting the attention of people standing around waiting for their coffees. “Taylor, calm down,” I reached across the table and patted her shoulder. “I am not mad at you,” I was amazed that I wasn’t fuming, but I kind of seen Claude cheating coming. I wouldn’t doubt he had other girls on the side, or that I was just another girl of his.

“You…” She sniffled and looked up at me, with long mascara tears. “You are not?”

“No,” I smiled handing her a napkin out of my purse. “Claude and I… we just aren’t compatible and I can’t get over your brother,”

After that awkward outburst, he returned the following morning, we had a long talk and we decided to break up, saying it was what was best for the both of us. He said he didn’t want to settle down yet and I said I wasn’t over Lucia’s Dad.

It was mutual and he said he’d let me stay with him until I can find other arrangements. “I mean, yeah… I am mad that my boyfriend cheated on me with my ex-boyfriends little sister and got her knocked up. Is he going to be there?”

“He said he’d call me the day after we talked in the park, but I haven’t heard from him,” She sighed, resting a hand on her stomach. “If he isn’t going to be around, then whatever, I’ll raise him by myself,”

“Taylor, you don’t even know how hard it is raising a baby on your own,” I patted her hand. “I raised Lucia on my own and I wished everyday I had Sidney there with me, because it was difficult. You have to be there 24/7, you can’t just leave. You can’t party like you used to, or have a glass of wine when you want to; you are up when they are up,” She frowned, obviously not thinking of the repercussions. “Taylor, I’ll be there to help you,”

“I don’t know what to do,” She frowned. “I’m like five months along, my parents don’t know, my brother doesn’t know,” She glanced casually out the window. “I can’t go back to school, I lost my place on the hockey team, so I’m fucked every way I go,”

“I’m sorry Taylor,” I patted her hand, running my finger along her thumb ring. “I thought my parents would despise me for getting pregnant and not being with the guy, but they understood. I know your Mom and Dad, and I know they wouldn’t turn their back on you,”

“I just feel like such a disappointment,” She laid her head on the table and sobbed into her hands. Poor girl. “My brother is the face of the goddamn NHL and I can’t keep my clothes on,”

“Taylor, my sister is an Australian supermodel and my brother plays pro football, I felt the same way,” I was amazed at how similar we were, and how similar we were feeling. I had it in my mind that my parents would disown me and my siblings wouldn’t talk to me. “I dropped out of college to raise my daughter on my own,”

“What happened?” She lifted her head up and looked at me. “I mean, were they mad?”

“No. I told them the truth, and I didn’t blame your brother for it, and they understood,” I sighed. “They were a little disappointed that I was dropping out of college, but I told them I’d not forget about it and go back to it, I am determined to provide a good life for my daughter with or without Sidney…”