Beneath Your Perfect

“Jade.” A scream fell from my mouth and I jumped up from the chair I was sitting on.

“What the hell Liam!” I screeched at him, holding a hand over my heart, feeling the fast pumps under my hand.

“Sorry, but I’ve been knocking for the last ten minutes.” Liam whined at me. I looked at him in surprise before glancing around my dark room.

“Oh sorry, well what’s up?” I asked him, taking a seat back in front of my laptop. Liam eyed me incredulous for a second.

“Remember you’re meeting family today? We have to leave soon to get there.” I gaped at him for a moment; thinking he lost his mind.

“Yeah but that’s tomorrow.” I responded. Liam sighed and walked over to my blinds pulling them open to let the bright sun filter in. I blinked rapidly trying to get used to the bright rays.

“It is tomorrow.” Liam said waving his hand towards the window. My mouth dropped open as I glanced at the time on my laptop. He was right. I had been writing throughout half the night without sleeping. “What on Earth have you been doing?”

“Writing,” I shrugged as Liam chuckled at me. “Do I have time for a shower?”

Liam nodded at me before I ran into my bathroom and took the quickest shower that was still acceptable.

“Liam where are you?” I called out, poking my head out of the bathroom door and kept the towel tight around my body.

“Kitchen.” His voice came from down the hallway.

“Stay there.” I yelled back before making a quick dash to my bedroom. I changed into clothes and dried my hair straight before applying make up. I went to leave the room before noticing that I left my laptop on and open. I headed over and quickly saved all the work that I had been doing last night.

I had finally started writing again and I was proud of myself. Even if the main reason I started was because my publishing company reminded me of my deadline. I was still writing again and that’s all that mattered.

“Ready?” Liam asked me handing me two pieces of toast. I smiled at him gratefully and nodded before scoffing down the breakfast and throwing my stuff into my bag. I met Liam at the door and he happily took my hand and led me down the stairs and out to his car. A few people had followed him here so a few flashes went off as we entered the car.

“So do your parents know how we um started?” I asked Liam cautiously. He glanced at me before pulling out onto the road.

“No they don’t. They know exactly what your parents know.” I nodded in acknowledgment and fiddled with Liam’s phone that was connected to the car’s speakers. “What are you doing?”

“Choosing a good song.” I muttered to him as I searched what seemed to be an endless list. “Do the like me?”

“I don’t know truthfully. I mostly avoid the conversation if my mum brings it up.” I looked up at Liam slightly hurt. He noticed and quickly tried to explain himself. “I mean when we first started. I mean I barely knew anything about you and well I didn’t know what to tell my mum.”

I nodded and chose a song as my heart stopped sinking to the bottom of my stomach.

“And what have you told her lately?” I asked him, keeping my eyes on his profile. He laughed and shook his head.

“You don’t get to know that.” He responded. I watched amused as a blush slipped across his face. I couldn’t help but reach my hand forward and lightly touch the reddened cheeks. Liam glanced at me before back at the road.

“I’ve never seen you blush.” I commented to him. He shot me an odd look as I pulled my hand away and turned the music up. I watched the scenery and curled up in the seat as my eyes slowly blinked close, I had hardly any sleep.

“Jade?” I made a noise so Liam knew I was still awake. “Can I ask you what your book is about?”

“You can ask but I’m not exactly ready to tell.” I told him shrugging. I was protective of my writing until I believed it to be okay to be seen by others.

“But I want to read your writing.” Liam whined in return. I turned my head to roll my eyes at him.

“So buy the books I already have published.” Liam looked thoughtful for a moment before admitting he hadn’t even thought of that. I burst out laughing before curling back up on the chair.

“Jade we’re here.” Liam’s voice woke me from my daze. I glanced around and noted the unfamiliar neighborhood and that we were pulled into a driveway. The car ride went way too quickly and the nervous feeling suddenly hit me full force.

“Relax. It’s not like you’re the naughty pop star who’s dating their daughter.” Liam said noticing my expression.

“Who knew you saying naughty would sound so naughty!” I suddenly burst out laughing. Liam rolled his eyes at me and pressed a kiss to my cheek, making me blush.
Before I could say anything I saw people out of the corner of my eye. I looked over to see people standing in the doorway to the house. Liam followed my eye line and a small smile broke across his face before he sighed and squeezed my hand. I realized that I wasn’t the only one nervous.

I stepped out of the car when Liam did and smiled awkwardly towards the two people standing in the doorway. I assumed they were Liam’s parents. Neither of them spared me a glance however as their eyes stayed trained on Liam.

Liam waited for me to reach his side of the car before he took my hand and basically pulled me towards the house.

“Liam!” Liam’s mum all but yelled at us before pulling Liam away from me and into his arms. I stood there watching as Liam’s father also joined their hug. Liam went stiff slightly before hugging them back. I felt awkward like I was intruding on a family moment. “It’s been too long.”

I watched as Liam’s mum wiped away a few tears and I wondered when was the last time Liam saw his family.

“You must be Jade.” Liam’s father said moving forward and held out his hand to me. I smiled and nodded, grabbing onto his hand.

“It’s nice to meet you Mr. Payne.” I said sweetly, flashing a smile. He smiled back instantly.

“You can call me Geoff.”

“And you can call me Karen.” Liam’s mum interrupted, pushing our hands out of the way and suddenly pulling me into a hug. I hugged her back and glanced at Liam surprised. I wasn’t expecting the hug.

“Well come on in you two. We have lunch ready.” Karen said letting me go and ushering us both inside. I immediately grabbed Liam’s hand, searching for some comfort in the unfamiliar place. Liam squeezed my hand tightly and led me to the left where we ended up in a dining room where two girls were sitting, talking.

“Finally we’re starving.” One said standing up and pulling Liam into a hug.

“Hey I’m Ruth.” The one not hugging Liam introduced herself to me.

“Jade.” I responded with a smile.

“And I’m Nicola.” The other girls said, pulling away from Liam.

“They’re my sisters.” Liam explained as I nodded in understanding.

“Older sisters.” Ruth said casually before taking a seat back at the table. Liam groaned and rolled his eyes.

“Is that necessary?” He whined at her.

“Kids!” Karen scolded before leaving the room to what I presumed was the kitchen, Geoff followed.

“Took you long enough to visit.” Nicola said suddenly to Liam. I glanced at her surprised.

“Drop it Nic.” Liam said, sighing.

“It’s been five months since any of us saw you!” She replied angrily. Now it was my turn to glance at Liam surprised. Who doesn’t see their families for five months? I knew he wasn’t busy everyday. He had only recently become busy again. Liam avoided my eyes as he glared at the wall to our left.

“Stuff happened.” He finally replied, his voice stiff. Nicola opened her mouth before Ruth chimed in.

“Enough you two. Before mum hears.” She said quickly. Nicola hesitated a moment before shutting her mouth and taking her seat from before. There was an awkward silence that fell around the room as I stared at the décor. If I could choose to be anywhere in the world right now, it would not be here. It would not even be with Liam. He obviously had family issues he needed to work out and now was probably not the best time to bring me into them.

“So I read one of your books Jade.” Ruth said suddenly, breaking the awkward silence.

“You did?” I asked her surprised.

“Yeah! So did Nic. When we heard who Liam was dating we thought we should check out some of your books.” She further explained.

“Too bad we didn’t find out from Liam who he was dating.” Nicola grumbled, sending a glare towards Liam. He opened his mouth to reply but I cut in.

“See your sisters read my book and you don’t even think about it.” I teased Liam. He shot me a glare from stopping him from speaking back. I rolled my eyes at his childishness and let go of his hand to take a seat at the table. “He wants to read the one I’m writing now.”

“Oh what are you writing about now?” Nicola asked eagerly, her eyes turning away from Liam.

“Sorry I can’t say until I know it’s perfect.” I apologized, shrugging.

“She’s annoyingly secretive about her writings.” Liam decided to join in, taking the seat next to me. I shot him a smirk.

“Well I read Dying Hearts. Which I love and I am not afraid to admit that I cried a lot over it. Like a lot.” I laughed at Ruth. I liked her she was incredibly sweet. Nicola seemed nice to, I thought she was a bit hard on Liam but I didn’t know enough about their situation to really say that.

At that moment both of Liam’s parents walked into the room carrying food. They laid a lot out on the table and we all dug in instantly. It was silent at first before Karen and Ruth began talking and before long everyone else joined in. Even Liam, who remained silent at the start, joined in.

His family was amazing. Not that much different to mine. Liam had two older sisters who loved teasing him just like my older brothers did to me. But I could also see their protective side. I couldn’t help but notice how they and Liam’s parents scrutinized his every move. Their eyes constantly watched him. I could tell this annoyed Liam as his movement became stiff throughout the meal and an annoyed look began to play across his face.

I knew Liam saw their watchfulness patronizing and annoying, like they didn’t trust him. Just like he thought his band mates didn’t care. But he couldn’t see it from my position. I could tell these people loved Liam endlessly and they were worried. They were worried because he was hurt and broken. So they watched him carefully ready to help wherever they could. Liam needed to understand this before he destroyed all his relationships.

After lunch I offered to help Karen clean up. Where else is it best to get information about Liam then from his mum? I could feel Liam’s eyes on me, as if he knew what I was doing.

I placed a few plates in the sink and glanced around the nice kitchen. My eyes fell onto a picture that consisted of two young girls and a baby.

“He was so little when he was younger.” Karen commented, noticing where I was looking. I glanced to the frame next to it and noticed them all a bit older. Liam probably would have been five.

“He was absolutely adorable.” I commented to her, smiling down at the cute picture of Liam.

“Thank you.” Karen said suddenly.

“For what?” I asked her confused, thinking she must have been thanking me fore helping her clean up.

“For helping him, for bringing him here.” She said as Ruth and Nicola walked int the door with more plates.

“Um I didn’t tell him to come here. This was his idea.” I told her honestly as she looked at me in surprise. I saw Ruth and Nicola exchange a look.

“Well you must have influenced him to somehow.” Ruth said to me.

“It’s just, Liam hadn’t seen or spoken to us for five months. And then suddenly he’s dating you and he speaks to us, even though it’s briefly. Then a week ago he calls up and asks if he can bring you over to meet us. If you didn’t do anything to help him then that was a massive coincidence.” Karen told me. I stared at her surprised at this information. I wasn’t aware that Liam hadn’t been talking to them for so long.

“I honestly didn’t do anything. Well not on purpose.” I tried to explain to them.

“Well whatever you’re doing, keep doing it. Just don’t leave him. He never even looked at Dani the way he looks at you. He looks at you like you’re his saviour and I actually think you are. You’ve helped Liam more than you know and he seems to be pretty dependant on that.” Nicola observed. I stared at them all for a moment as they carried on cleaning up the kitchen.

A sinking feeling began spreading through my stomach. They might have thought it was a good thing that Liam seemed to be getting better. But I didn’t think that. He wasn’t getting better; he was just ignoring his problems in the hope that they will go away. They won’t.

I wasn’t helping him; in fact I might have been making things worse. Liam was acting better because of me. He was behaving like this because he assumed this was how we was supposed to behave. I saw that part of him at the date the other night. And now everyone else was noticing it, except it wasn’t a good thing. Not like they thought.

I was Liam’s reason for getting better and one thing I knew for sure was that nothing good would come out of that. Liam needed to get better and face his problems because he wanted to, for himself.
Not because he was trying to impress me or ensure I stayed with him.