Passenger Seat

After the tumblr incident, I became a bit bitter when it came to One Direction fans. I never spoke out about it or voiced my dislike around them or even on the internet, but I never talked to them. Whenever I was with Niall and/or one of the other lads and they were stopped I kept my distance. A big enough distance that no one felt the need to engage me in conversation. It probably didn’t help the internet hate, but I didn’t really care anymore. I was numb to any and all things these girls thought about me.

I now completely understood how Eleanor felt about them. The thing I didn’t want though, was Niall snapping at any one of them like Louis was known to do. That wasn’t who he was- he was kind to everyone, even if they treated him like shit to his face. I loved that about him, but I also hated it.
I did notice that people started making blogs about me for my modeling, not just because I was a “One Direction Girlfriend.” There were gifs of me from the Bring Me The Horizon video and countless edits of my photos from Oli’s and Josh’s clothing lines. It was really cool and was kind of a silver lining to all the negative I’ve been getting.

My name was also getting around the band scene. One day while I was at Niall’s flat with him, Zayn and Harry, I got a call from a blocked number. I didn’t answer the first time, but when they called again I finally answered.

“Hello?”

“Hi is this Ayden Scarpelli?”

I didn’t recognize the voice, so I was really weary of this. “Who’s asking?” I said timidly.

The guy chuckled, “This is Austin Carlile. I got your number from Josh, I was wondering if you’d wanna do a shoot for my clothing line.”

I almost dropped my phone. I guess my face showed my freak out because the three lads looked at me funny. “Are you joking?” I shrieked a bit.

“Um, no…?” Austin laughed.

“Of course I want to do a shoot for you! I’m a huge fan!” I rushed out. I tried to keep my composure, but it wasn’t working.

He laughed at my insanity I’m sure, “Thank you, that’s sweet. Well let me figure out when exactly we’ll be ready for a shoot and I’ll contact you again and figure out if that time works for you and if you wanna come to the states, or I can send my team to you.”

“Okay, yeah that’s fine. Thank you for thinking of me to represent your brand!”

“That was so official,” he laughed. “No problem, I love your look. The stuff you’ve done with Bring Me The Horizon is epic! We’ll keep in touch.”

After the phone call had ended the guys made fun of me for my fangirl moment, but I didn’t care. I was going to be modeling for Austin fucking Calilie’s clothing line!

A couple days after that Austin called again and it was official. I was going to model for his line during the week I was going to be in America with the lads for their MSG concert and Jingle Ball. I was so excited I told everyone. I tweeted it, facebooked it, told all my friends; all of it. Blue almost lost her shit like I did when she told her. She loved Austin Carlile as much as I did, so she knew how exciting this was for me. I even promised I’d bring her along when I went to do it.

I even brought Josh a massive cake for helping throw this whole thing together.

“Seriously, I can’t thank you enough Josh!” I said when I brought the cake to his house.

He stuck a fork right into it without cutting a piece, “It was nothing Ayd. I knew how big of a fan of Of Mice & Men you are, and Austin mentioned he was looking for models so it was a no brainer to mention your name.”

“Seriously, I love you for it. I owe you so much more than a cake!”

He laughed, “You can make me cookies and biscuits too if you’re like.”

“Deal.”

The girls were excited for me as well, “I’m so happy your modeling is actually becoming something Ayden!” Eleanor gushed one night when Blue, Dani and I were at her flat.

I shrugged, “It’s not a big thing, kind of ‘underground’ or whatever, but I’m excited.”

“I like that you’re doing it for your close friends and friends of friends,” Dani said, “It’ll get you comfortable in front of the camera for if you ever decide to try and go mainstream.”

I nodded, “Yeah, but I can’t see myself being a runway model or doing commercials and stuff like that. I like modeling t-shirts and leggings.”

“You definitely wear the shit out of them love,” Blue encouraged.

“You should do more topless ones. I loved that spread!” Eleanor beamed.

I laughed, “I don’t know about that one. It was uncomfortable to be posing with Matt with my naughty bits out.”

“You should do one with Niall. You know, a private collection,” Dani said raising her eyebrows suggestively.

“I’d shoot it!” Blue laughed.

I blushed so bad at this topic at hand, “Um, no. It’s so cheesy when couples get their pictures professionally done.”

El laughed, “It isn’t if your naaaked!”

“That’s just what we need,” I shook my head, “Niall and Ayden nudes floating around.”

“Good point,” they all said without a beat.

“Has anyone heard from Kota?” Danielle asked changing the subject.

The mood in the flat changed at the mention of Dakota.

“No, nothing more than a short phone call or text message,” Eleanor sighed, “I hate that she’s gone off the grid. We’ve been friends for so long.”

“I know,” Dani agreed.

Blue and I exchanged sorrowful looks. Just like it hurt me to see Harry so broken up over Dakota dumping him, it was just as bad seeing how broken up Danielle and Eleanor were as well. They’d been so close for so long, being the girlfriends of this boy band, and then Dakota just… dumped them too.

After having dinner with the girls, Blue and I left. She went to Max’s house and I went to Niall’s flat.
“I missed you,” he said when I crawled in next to him on his bed where he was watching, shocker, football highlights.

I leaned into his side and kissed his lips softly, “You saw me this morning you twat.”

“So you’re saying you didn’t miss me?” he scoffed offended.

“No I did” I laughed. I rested my head on his chest staring at the tellie screen. Boring footie. “How was the press today?”

I felt him shrug against me, “Same stuff as usual. I’m just ready to play the Gardens already.”

I turned, resting my chin on his chest to look up at him, “So am I. It’ll be my first actual legit One Direction concert.”

“I’m glad I get to share this with you. And the rest of my family.” The part where he said ’rest of my family’ didn’t go unnoticed.

“I can’t wait to meet them.”

“My mom’s ecstatic. She’s been dying to meet you.” He laughed, “She told me to tell you congratulations on your shoot you booked while we’re there.”

I laughed, “Tell her thanks. I’m so excited to shoot for Austin’s line Niall!” I beamed. “I’m glad it worked out with his schedule that I could shoot it between MSG and Jingle Ball. It’s like fate! Meant to happen.”

He laughed at me, “You’re so cute when you’re passionate about things.”

“Don’t be a tosser,” I pinched his side causing him to flinch and laugh. We settled back into a comfortable silence as he watched the highlights and I kind of just zoned out. He was wearing basketball shorts to I could see that he was wearing his knee brace. I reached down and brushed my hand across it, “Your knee gonna be okay during the tour coming up?”

“Should be,” he sighed. “Can’t get surgery until after so I’m supposed to be going to the gym to strengthen it as much as possible.”

I chuckled, “Wow, you’ve been slacking on that haven’t you.”

“Don’t tell anyone.”

I looked back up at him, “You should take it more seriously though. I mean, it’s your knee.
“I know,” he nodded. “Harry said he’s going to start dragging me with him to the gym so I’ll be going a lot more now. Don’t worry about me.”

I rolled my eyes at him, “Yeah, I’ll get right on that.”

*****

What a coincidence that the day the girls and I talk about Dakota, she pops back into my life…

Later that night when we were fast asleep my phone started blaring with an incoming call. I sat up groggily as I leaned over to grab my phone out of my purse. Niall hardly stirred. Kota’s name was flashing across my screen.

“Hello?” I asked clearing, my throat from sleep. I could hear loud pulsing music on the other end.

“Is this Ayden?” an unrecognizable girls voice asked.

“Yeah, who’s this?”

“Who’s that?” Niall grumbled, rolling onto his back.

“I’m Rachel, Kota’s friend. Look she’s in really bad shape right now, and I’m not sober enough to drive her home. She told me to call Zayn but he didn’t pick up so she said to call you.”

I was more awake now, “Where are you?” She gave me the name of the club, “I’ll be there as soon as possible,” I promised before hanging up. I got up and started changing out of Niall’s clothes that I sleep in back into mine.

“Where are you going? It’s almost 2:30,” Niall said sitting up and turning a light on.

“That was some girl with Dakota, she said she needs me to go get Kota.” I was fully dressed now and slipping my shoes on.

He started to get up, “I’ll go with you.”

“No,” I said. “If you come, it’ll only cause a massive scene. What I need you to do, if you really want to help, is go to Zayn’s and wake him up out of his sleep coma. I think Dakota really needs him.”

He nodded, “Okay, I can do that.” He got up and pulled me into him, “Be careful yeah?”

“I will,” I kissed him goodbye.

The club Rachel said they were at was only about a 15 minute drive from Niall’s place. I’d never been there, but it wasn’t sketchy. When I got there I called Kota’s phone and told Rachel I was outside and got out to wait by the entrance where a bouncer and a bunch of smokers were.

I’d only been standing there about 5 minutes when a girl I didn’t know came out, stumbling about with an almost passed out Dakota on her shoulders. Who I assumed was Rachel looked around like she was looking for me, as if she knew what I looked like.

“Rachel?” I asked walking over to them. I hurried to the other side of Dakota and threw her arms around my shoulders to support her weight. “How much did she drink?”

“Waaaay more than me!” Rachel giggled. “Thanks for getting her. She was supposed to be DD so that’s why I’m a bit toasted.”

I gave her a light smile, “Alright. She’s in good hands, right Kota?” The girl in my grasp hardly acknowledged my presents, let alone answered my question. Her eyes were bloodshot and hardly open and she reeked of booze. I said goodbye to Rachel and carried/dragged Kota’s dead weight to my car. I all but threw her in the passenger seat and strapped her in.

Dakota was quiet as we started to drive, her head leaning against the window staring off into the distance. “Are you okay Kota?” I asked timidly.

She groaned, “Do I look okay Ayden?” Her accent was thick with slur.

“No you don’t. That’s why I asked.”

“I drank too much, I’ll be fine. I used to drink like this all the time when I was younger. Maybe this is the real me.”

Well that’s something I’ve never heard. I didn’t know Kota may have had some kind of past. “This isn’t the real you Kota.”

“And how would you know? You haven’t known me all that long,” she snapped.

That hurt but she had a point. But I wasn’t about to let her snap at me, “I’ve known you long enough to know that this isn’t the Dakota everyone knows and loves. I don’t know what’s going on with you but I’m not going to let you push me away like you’re doing to everyone else.”

She didn’t say anything to that, just went back to silently staring at the window. When I got closer to Zayn’s house though she sat up, “Where are we going?”

“Zayn’s.”

She groaned and cursed under her breath, “No he can’t see me like this, he’ll kill me.”

“It’s too late, he already knows you’re coming.”

She huffed and sat back against the seat again. I pulled up to the gate of Zayn’s community and typed in his number so he could buzz us in. Within a few seconds the gate opened and we were in.

Zayn and Niall were outside when we pulled up. Zayn, wearing nothing but sweat pants, was at Kota’s door before I even put my car into park. “What are you doing Kota? Again?” He asked her as he pulled her out of the car and carrying her bridal style into the house.

Niall met me at my door and shut it behind me, “She okay?”

“I don’t think so. You should have seen here when I got there, she was practically dead on her legs.” We followed after Zayn into his house and he carried his oldest friend upstairs.

Niall pulled me into the living room, “We should give him some time with her, get her settled.” I nodded and went with him to sit on the couch. “Are you okay?” he asked as he ran his fingers through my hair. It felt amazing, and I laid my head on his shoulder.

I shrugged as I yawned, “Yeah, just worried about her.”

“We all are.”

“She said something in the car,” I brought up, “That she used to be like this when she was younger.”

Niall was quiet for a moment, “I don’t really know the whole story on that. When we met Dakota, she was about to finish her A levels and go to University. But I guess she used to be a problem kid. She was with a bad crowd for a little bit, but then her parents sent her to a counselor to get help and she got better. I guess she got out right before Zayn tried out for X-Factor. It was why he was so protective of her, though none of us knew that was why at the time.”

“Oh. I would have never have guessed.” I was honestly at a loss for words.

“None of us could. She is one of the strongest people I’ve ever known, so thinking about her as a troubled kid was hard to imagine. But now, it’s like…becoming reality.”

I didn’t get a chance to say anything in reply because we heard Zayn coming down the stairs. Niall and I stood when he entered. He looked wiped out, “Thanks for getting her Ayden.”

I nodded, “It’s no problem. I’d do it for any of you.”

He gave me a sad smile, “She’s passed out now.” He shrugged, “I haven’t seen her like this in a long time.” He bit his lip as he stared off at the ground.

I didn’t know what to say to try and comfort him. Luckily my boyfriend jumped in just in time, “She’ll be okay mate. She’s just having a rough time is all.”

Zayn nodded, “Just wish she’d talk to me. Tell me what’s going on.”

“Maybe she will. Just give her time,” I said, trying to keep his spirit up.

He shrugged, “I hope so. You guys should head home, get some sleep. I put her in my bed so I can keep an eye on her, make sure she doesn’t choke to death on her puke,” he grimaced.

I walked over to him and kissed his cheek, “Call me if you need anything, yeah? I’ll be here.”

He pulled me into a tight hug then, “Thanks love. For everything.”

“You don’t have to thank me,” I whispered back.

Niall pulled his band mate into a hug next, “Call either of us, and we’ll be here,” he said. “You aren’t in this alone.”

Zayn nodded and walked us to the door. He paused before opening it and looked back at us, “I don’t think any of us should tell Harry. At least not right away. If it happens to come out in the papers, we’ll deal with it then, but on the off chance it doesn’t… he doesn’t need to stress over this, yeah?”

I bit my lip and looked at Niall. These were his friends first so I’d do what he thought was best. He nodded, “I agree.”

Then he and Zayn looked at me. I sighed, “I don’t like lying, but alright.”

“We aren’t lying,” Zayn argued. “Just withholding some information.”

I rolled my eyes, “Nice loophole. Get some sleep babe.”