내 곁에 있어줘

The day that marked the significant changes in my life started out as mundane as any other. It was the first day of the new school year and the first day of my junior year of high school. Like any other single girl, I was planning to look immaculate on my first day on the off chance that someone would check me out. I dragged a brush through my hair, splashed some water on my face, and debated on whether or not to shower in the morning before school or in the evening before bed.

"Are you almost done, Emiko?" my mom asked from outside the bathroom door.

"Give me a minute," I called, quickly throwing on some foundation and mascara. No eyeliner today. I opened the door and almost tripped over one of our two dogs, who happened to be lying right outside the door, as was his habit. I quickly slipped off the yellow bathroom slippers and put on a pair of pink house slippers, heading back to my room to get my backpack.

"We need to go soon," my mom warned me, closing the bathroom door behind her. As I put the last few notebooks into the bag, my phone vibrated. I flipped it open. It was Ellie, my childhood best friend.

Mr. Mercer told me that the secretary in the office asked about you. When you get here, you're supposed to go straight to the office.

I slung my plain backpack over my shoulder and took a final look in the mirror. I had a big butt and plump thighs. More than anything, I wanted to hide them under a long skirt or baggy pants. Just considering the idea caused my imagination to conjure up a very likely fit of nagging from my mother about how I was beautiful the way I was and how I should show off my curves. I closed my bedroom door and hurried out to the car where my mom was waiting.

"Are you excited?" my mom asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

"Not really," I told her, though that wasn't exactly true.

"Emiko, you spent all summer at home. You should be happy to return to school and see your friends."

I didn't say anything else. We were both quiet until she pulled up to the school.

"Have a good day, Emiko," she said, some sadness in her voice. I turned away and pulled my backpack with me out the door.

"Bye, mom."

A rush of warm air greeted me as I opened the front doors. Several groups of students were milling around the common area, already clustered together into cliques. Recalling Ellie's text, I headed straight for the office. The secretary, a stout and almost burly woman, looked up at me from her computer.

"Can I help you?" she asked, looking at me as if she'd never seen me before.

"I'm Emiko Jiang. My friend Ellie Yzchev told me that you were looking for me."

"Oh, you're Emiko?" she asked, giving me a sudden and uncomfortable assessment. Her expression said that she'd had higher expectations of me. I found my hand clutching my sweater tightly and forced myself to relax. She nodded to herself, her obviously-fake red curls bouncing. "This year, we have a good number of foreign transfers. Considering that you were last year's International Diversity Club president, the administration wanted to extend to you the opportunity to help the school with tutoring the ESL students."

Languages were my specialty, and that was no secret. Still, the offer surprised me. "I don't know how much I can help. It depends on where the students are from."

"We have some from Vietnam, Mexico, Laos, Africa, Korea, and the Philippines," she said, waving her hand as if it didn't matter. She sniffed. "If you agree to help, we will waive your community service requirement."

Like it mattered. Like the other dutiful students, I had finished my community service hours already. The only things I would get out of this arrangement were the knowledge that I was helping the students and perhaps ESL teaching experience to put on my resume. I didn't even know if it would count, but at least it was better than nothing.

"Sure, I'll help."

"Good. This will outline your duties and the course curriculum for ESL classes. You will be helping Ms. Gonzales in room 241." The secretary handed me a binder that weighed about ten pounds and shooed me out the door. I stood in the hallway for a moment with the binder in my hands. What the hell just happened?

Students rushed past me as the first bell rang. The clang of lockers opening and closing echoed through the hallway, punctuating the loud conversations that flowed into and over each other. I eased my way into the crowd and found my locker, which happened to be near the fire exit, where few people were. I didn't have a first class that morning, so I was expected to go to room 241 and help the teacher with ESL. I tried my combination a few times to get a feel for my locker and closed it, walking a few feet to the door near my locker- room 241.

The room was filled with students, fuller than I'd ever seen ESL at the high school. It was also more diverse. Demographically, my school was primarily white even though Latino had become a prevalent minority as well. It was rare to see Africans or Asians, but in that classroom, it was mostly Asian and African. Everyone turned to stare at me, including the short teacher.

"Who are you?" she asked slowly and enunciating crisply.

"Emiko Jiang. I'm here to help with ESL."

"Oh, that's right. The secretary told me about you. Welcome, Ms. Jiang," she said, smiling warmly. She turned to her class. "We were just about to start introductions. Would you like to start, Emiko? Just say your full name, where you come from, and one interesting thing about you."

I always sucked at those kinds of things. I looked out at the group of students (all of them boys except two, I suddenly noticed) and said, "I'm Emiko ShuYao Jiang. I was born in Kona, Hawaii, and I can speak six languages."

"Which languages are those?" Ms. Gonzales asked, noting the interest on the students' faces.

"Japanese, French, Chinese, German, Welsh, and Tagalog."

"Ako ay Pilipino," a boy in the front row said eagerly. "Sigurado ka Pilipino?"

"Hindi ako," I answered, "Isa ng aking mga pinakamahusay na mga kaibigan na nagturo sa akin Tagalog."

"That's enough, everyone," Ms. Gonzales said, "if you have questions for Emiko, please wait until after class." She gestured for the Filipino boy to introduce himself.

"I'm Gerard, from Philippines. I play use skateboard."

The next boy was Latino. He wore a plain shirt and thick work jeans. "I'm Jose Alvarez. I'm from Guatemala. I like engineering."

"Justin Villanueva, Philippines. I am born in China."

"I am Quoc Anh Ha. I am Vietnamese. My father is businessman." I remembered seeing Anh before, but I didn't know he was in ESL classes. We had chorus together in my freshman year.

"My name is Karim, from La Cote D'Ivoire. I speak three language."

"I'm Yasmine Cotier from Senegal. I have only 16 years."

Several more introductions followed until the flow was interrupted by a sudden pause. I lifted my eyes from the ground and looked around the room for the cause. The introductions had passed all the way to the back of the room, where the class was waiting on an Asian boy. He was skinny and shy-looking, with brown-black hair and small, almond-shaped eyes. His cheekbones were high and slightly pronounced, and his lips were small and puckered. As I stared at him, he blushed and I couldn't explain the fluttering that began in my chest.

"I-I'm Jinyoung... I am from Korea... ah..." he focused intently on his desk, keeping his head down. "I-I... play bass guitar."

Though the introductions continued, I kept my eyes on that boy. Jinyoung. He was already pretty cute, but the longer I looked at him, the more attracted I became to him. He caught me staring a few times, and when I managed to find something else to look at, I could swear I felt him staring at me too.

A cute new boy and new responsibilities for the school year... maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all.