A Million Nights

"You always told me it had been the destiny! You always told me that and you always told that to Annie.”

Brian opened his eyes and saw Tay setting next to him. She looked at him for some seconds and then her gaze travelled till the sea. She was really worried about Annie. And about Brian too. Annie had passed these last months in a big depression and Tay knew Brian was in the same situation. Seeing Brian there lied down on the sand, hiding his face with in his hands, expressing sadness with all his body expression. Tay needs to do something and she did something.

“Tay… listen, I don’t wanna talk about her, okay?”

“Wow! You don’t wanna talk about her? So, why are you here?”

“What’s the problem of being here?”

“Was it here, wasn't it?” - Brian got up a little, looking at the sea. He smiled a little but… Tay could see that it was a sad smile like he was remembering all the moments he passed there with Annie. He wanted to live those moments again and again. Maybe for the rest of his life. For sure for the rest of his life. Brian tried to say something but he couldn’t. His brown eyes became black with sadness, with pain… - “Brian… you know what I think about you, right? I can’t say that I hate you but… I don’t like you. I always showed you that. I love Annie, you know? I love her a lot! When we meet each other… well, it seems she already knew me. It was… it was weird, you know? But at the same time, I saw her like… like an older sister I never had. She told me about her dream to come to live to America. She told me about her dream to become a language teacher. She told me how much she loves music. I admired her at that moment. And I always support her even I thought all that were just… dreams! I was wrong. I was so wrong. She finished her degree, she took all her stuff and… here she is! She was really happy. She got it! But… I never saw Annie as happy as when she was dating you. Never ever!”

“Tay, please. I kno…”

“Brian! Let me finish! She was really happy with you. She loves so much. So so so much. Do you remember when we meet each other on the tattoo shore? My God! It has been for so long! When I saw Johnny… I felt the world turning and turning… I felt my world turn around him. Yeah! I never told this to anyone. I felt a big attraction for Johnny. I always did. When I saw him… I don’t know but… I felt in that moment that guy was the man of my life. He is the man of my life. I show always a part of me that... It’s actually a shell. A very big shell. In the bottom of my heart I knew I couldn’t tell anyone what I felt in that moment. You know why? Because Johnny Christ is famous. He’s the bassist of the band Avenged Sevenfold. I could never ever get involved with him. I could never assume that I was in love with him. I was just a girl who came to the States to live a new adventure. But that was when I looked at Annie. I looked at her… my God… I look at her and then I looked at you and though: “she got it! She got all her wanted unless a true love. But she found it and this true love is standing in front of her’. In that moment I saw you and Johnny are normal people that fall in love and Johnny… Johnny had to be mine. As you know, and as everybody knows, we have a ‘secret’ romance. I really love Johnny. I love him from the bottom of my heart. But if he asking me to marry him… I don’t know if I would say yes. Because whatever your lifestyle, I love what Johnny would do everything to support him being near or far. Annie would do the same. But as much as we love you, it's too soon. Now, think about it.”

Tay got up and left Brian alone. Brian looked at her and saw her go. All her words has sense and he knew it but Brian was very disappointed with Annie but with himself too. He thought to forget in all what happened. He lied down on the sand again, thinking in all Tay had said. On the one hand, he missed Annie a lot. He couldn’t forget Annie. Four months had passed and they didn’t see each other neither once. Till today.
Brian decided to come back home. To go to his house, Brian had to go on the street where Annie lived. We walked and walked till he found himself in front of the front door of Annie’s house. He stopped for some seconds.

“Should I go to talk to her?” - Brian took a step forward towards the door. But he quickly retreated. – “No. I can’t. You don’t deserve her, Brian. You don’t deserve her.”

Brian continued walking to his house, with his hands in his trouser pockets, dragging his feet as if he had no more strength to follow the path. He was alone. He had lost his best friend and now he lost his girlfriend, who had become his haven.

Annie had spent the entire summer locked in her room, crying day and night. She only left her bedroom to eat and go to the bathroom. Her friends were very worried about her. It was September and the school year was about to begin. For the first time, over four months, Annie leaves the room with a smile on her face. She went down stairs and saw Rita and Zacky in the living room, hugging each other.

“Hey guys!”

“Annie! Good to see you!” – Rita said looking at her, cleaning the tears of her face. Annie looked at them again and saw Zacky was crying too.

“What happened?”

“Annie… we can’t talk yet but… tonight we will give a dinner at my house ... we want you to go." – Zacky said putting his hand on Rita’s belly.

“But… what is the reason?”

“We can’t tell you, sis. But… you have to go! Please!” - Rita walked towards Annie and started begging Annie to go.

“Okay, okay. I’ll be there.” – Annie showed a big smile but quickly that smile which everybody didn't see for months was gone. – “Zacky… who is going to this dinner?”

“Well, you, Tay, Johnny, Veronica, Shadows and…” – Zacky hesitated. – “And Brian…”

“Oh Gosh… I really have to go to this dinner?”

“Yes, Annie. It’s so important to me. I really need you there.” – Rita said grabbing Annie’s hands on yours.

“Okay. My God! I can’t believe I’ll see Brian again… after all this months. Well, I'll walk a little. I need some air. See you soon.”

Annie left the house and went to the beach. It was 16pm. She walked to that place where Brian and her meet each other, where they fell in love, where they found the true love.
Such as Brian, she had hoped to find him there. But he was not there. She sat on the sand looking at the sea for a few minutes. She looked around and nobody was there. She was alone. She closed her eyes and let her body fall slowly. She lied down on the sand and just listened to the sound of waves. Moments later, she managed to erase all her thoughts, all the memories... a few minutes later that calm was interrupted. Her phone started ringing.

“Hello?”

“Annie! It’s Tay, listen. Veronica and I were thinking about to go to the mall to buy something to wear tonight…”

“I’m sorry girls…”

“Where are you?”

“I’m on the beach… why?”

“Beach? In that place, right?”

“Yeah… Right here! Right now! Why?”

“Listen… we miss you, Annie. We live at the same house but… We miss Annie. That Annie who loves shopping, that funny Annie who was always making fun of everybody… come on! Let’s go buy some new clothes to the special dinner!”

“Tay, I…”

“Okay… we'll be there in 10 minutes.”

“NO! TAY! Are you… she hung up the call! Bitch…” – Annie didn’t feel in mood to shop but Tay had the ability to make Annie laugh and 10 minutes later they went to the mood.

It was already 19pm and the girls are late. They wore new clothes and they drove to Zacky house. Rita was already there with Zacky and the boys was there too. Brian was always looking at the door. He was very anxious to see Annie again. He was alone on the living room sitting on the couch. Zacky and Rita were on the kitchen cooking and Matt and Johnny were next to the Cd’s shelf talking about music. Matt looked at Brian and saw how much he was nervous.

“Hey Gates, come here next to us.”

“I’m sorry buddy… I want to stay here for a while…”

Johnny’s phone started ringing. He took it and read the message.

“It’s Tay. Girls are coming!” - Brian hearing that, he got up of the couch and went to the courtyard. Matt was behind him. Brian sat on a garden bench and took a deep breath.
Matt sat next to him and put his arm around Brian's shoulder.

"Come on, man. You knew this day would come..."

"Yeah... I'm not ready to see her again!"

"I know that... Syn, why aren't you ready to see her?"

"What you mean?"

"Why aren't you ready to see her? What prevents you from seeing Annie?"

"What prevents me..." - Brian said looking at the sky. - "Jesus, Matt! What are you talking about?"

"Syn, you're not ready because you love her. You love her more and more even you don't see her or talk to her..."

Brian looked at Matt with his sad brown eyes. Matt was right. Brian still loved Annie, more than yesterday, less than tomorrow. He was afraid to see her again. He knew, seeing Annie, all his feelings would be aroused.

"Fuck, Matt..." - Brian murmured. - "You have no idea how many times I've caught on my phone to call her. You have no ideas how many times I went to her house to talk to her but I didn't do it. She has suffered so much because of me. I can't do that to her. She deserve to be happy..."

"And you? Don't you deserve to be happy? Come on, Brian! You were happy with her. We've never seen you so happy. After dinner I want you to go talk to her, okay?"

"I can't, Matt..."

"Brian, please... She loves you. You love her. You two can be happy together."

"I don't know, Matt..." - Brian got up of the bench and went back to the living room.

Girls were coming. Veronica was driving, and Tay and here were singing metal music like Slipknot and other stuff like that. But they realized Annie was not okay. She was very nervous. She didn’t take her eyes at her hands. Veronica turned off the radio and looked at Annie through the rearview mirror.

“Annie… please, it kills me see you like this!”

“I’m sorry, Veronica. I’m so sorry but… I’m not ready to see Brian again.”

“Annie, Annie… can pass days, weeks, months, even years… You love Brian! It’s normal you aren’t ready to see him again but… you will see him…” - Tay said turning to Annie with a small smile.

“Right now! We have arrived!” – Veronica said stopping the car behind of Brian’s car.

Girls left the car and went to the front door. Veronica and Tay went ahead to get to the door but they turned back and hugged Annie. She was shaking a lot and stared at the door.

“Are you ready, Annie?” – Veronica asked.

“No… But I have to.”

Tay rang the bell and Johnny quickly opened the door. They kiss each other and then Veronica and Annie came into the house. In the moment Annie came into the house Brian came into the living room. His eyes found her ones and they couldn’t move.

“Hey… Annie!” – Johnny said to Annie but she didn’t take her eyes at Brian.

“Hi guys… how… how are you?” – Annie hugged Johnny and Matt and then she walk towards Brian. He was staring at her without moving. Annie stopped in front of him, looking into his eyes. They were so silent, only looking at each other for a moment. Something seemed to push them against each other. they were approaching. their bodies were almost touching when they were interrupted by Veronica.

“Hi... Brian!” – Veronica said to Brian. She saw that he had interrupted their moment. - "Ups... I'm sorry guys."

“Hi Veronica…” - Brian said while Annie moved away. She run next to Rita and held her like Rita was her lurking place.

"Fuck, Vero! They were almost to kiss each other."

"I know, Tay, I know. I just do shit!"

"Forget it. Look, Shadows is calling you!"

“Come on guys! Let’s have dinner!”

Brian and Annie separated and joined the group for dinner. They sat in front of each other and they were always looking at each other and they almost didn’t talk during dinner.
Matt was sitting next to Annie and seeing her so sad, he began to talk to her taking advantage the fact that Brian was talking with Zacky.

“So Annie, how are you?”

“I miss him!” - Annie said, dragging the fork on the food and resting her head in one hand.

“I know. I can see it in your eyes. He misses you too. Why you don’t talk about everything and… solve the things? You love each other. You belong together, Annie.”

“I hurt him, Matt. I don’t deserve him.”

“You don’t deserve him? So, who deserve him? Who, Annie? Michelle? Girls like Michelle? Please, Annie… Look at him and look at you! You’re perfect together. Go talk to him!”

Annie looked at Brian and at the same time he looked at her. They stared at each other till Zacky called their attention beating with a fork in cup.

“Please guys! I wanted to ask you a few minutes of attention...” – everybody looked at Zacky and Rita when they got up of the chair unless Annie and Brian. – “…mainly from yours, Annie... Brian...” – Brian and Annie stopped looking at each other and looked at Rita and Zacky.

“First of all, thank you very much for being here. We invite you to this dinner because we have news to tell you.” – Rita said looking at everybody. She was so happy.

“Well, I met Rita in a darkest moment in my life. I met her thank to Annie and… thank to Brian too.” – Annie looked down to her lap, controlling the strong desire she had to cry. Brian looked at Annie. His sorrow and pain invaded his gaze. – “Rita is the woman of my life. Yeah, she’s the woman of my life and she’s pregnant. We’ll have a baby, like all of you know. Today, we were to the hospital for one more echography.”

“Yeah, we did another ecography and… we already know the sex of the baby!”

“OH MY GOD!!! TELL US, PLEASE!!!” – Veronica and Tay started screaming like crazy with happiness. Annie just smiled. She was happy for her sister but she couldn’t control her sadness because of Brian. Rita looked at Annie and smiled, showing her support and comprehension.

“Okay, okay… IT’S A GIRL!!!” – The girls and the boys got up of their chairs and run to Rita and Zacky hugging them with all their love and friendship. Brian and Annie were the last ones getting up. They looked at each other and Brian smile at Annie leaving her a little more relieved.

“Come here, bro!” – Brian said hugging Zacky.

“Congratulations, sis. I’m so happy for you. This little girl will be the most beautiful Californian girl!”

“She'll be like her Aunt Annie!”

Annie hugged Zacky and Brian hugged Rita but was now that everything changed.

“Please, Annie, Brian… We have something to tell you.” – Zacky said, hugging both. Annie and Brian looked at each other confused. – “I couldn’t talk about this but… I have to. You, Annie, you are Rita’s best friend and she loves you with all her heart and you, Brian… you’re my brother, man. We’re the best guitarist of the world!”

“That’s right, man!” – Brian said with a big smiled. Annie seeing his beautiful smile, she came back that world of passion in which both were involved in the past.

“So… I have to be honest, guys. I don't know what you are doing. I mean, you love each other..." - Brian and Annie begun to be a little bit uncomfortable with that conversation and Zacky noticed that. So he changed the subject. - "Fuck, man. Rita please…”

“Thanks babe, to give me the difficult part. Well, Annie… You're the one who knows me to 100%. I don't need to talk when I'm sad. You know it just looking at me. I don't need to smile to let you know that I'm happy. But I also know you very well... and I know you aren't complete. Brian... you're not complete too. You two know why. I just know that Annie never loved anyone as much as she loved Brian. Zacky knows that you, Brian, you never loved anyone as much as you loved Annie. I don't know if you will be together again but... it was thanks to your love that Zacky and I are together today, waiting a beautiful baby girl. So because of this, we want to invite you to be the godparents of Kelly.”

“Oh my God! Are you serious?” - Annie smiled honestly for the first time in that night. Rita hugged her, giving her several kisses on her cheeks.

“She already has a name, Kelly! Good choice, dude!” – Brian said, slamming his hand on the Zacky’s chest.

“I know, man. But now you and Annie have lots of things to do together. You could start now, what are you think?” – Zacky looked at Brian and winked his eye to him. He turned to Rita, hugged her and went to the living room with the rest of the group.

Brian and Annie were alone again. Annie lowered her head and fixed her gaze on the floor. Brian was a little further back, looking at her. He raised his arm to touch her shoulder to her could look up to him but he couldn't do that. He began to walk from one side to the other, very slowly, fixing his gaze in his footsteps.

Annie lifted her head slightly and looked at him. Right in that moment, he turned back and got in front of her. Their eyes met again. He started walking towards her.

“I wonder how I could be four months away from you.” – Annie said. Her eyes were red and filled with tears. Her eyes were fixing the eyes of Brian.

Brian turned his gaze away, turning back to Annie. He looked at the ceiling, putting his hands around his head. He stayed just a few seconds like that. Suddenly he turned to Annie.

"Why do I love you so much?"

"Why don't we try again, Bri? I need you. You're my life. you're part of me and I love you so much..."

"We can't, Annie. We can't."

"Why? I know I hurt you, Brian. I know that and I'm so sorry for that. But I wanna live with you. I wanna make part of you life..."

"Please Annie. Stop." - Brian tried to stop Annie to talk. But she continued.

"...I wanna be far away from you when you go in tour, I wanna miss you and I wanna wait for you. I wanna love you every day and every night, Bri."

"ANNIE, STOP! PLEASE, STOP!" - Brian grabbed Annie's hands and he leaned her against to the wall. - "You have already suffered so much because of me, Annie. I can't do that to you. But you can be sure that... I never loved anyone like I love you."

"I love you, too. Stay with me! Please…” - Annie said whispering. Brian began approaching Annie. He leaned his forehead against hers and they stayed there for a moment, eyes closed, almost kissing.

"Don't do this to me, Annie."

"I can't stop loving you..."

"You have to."

"But I don't want to."

Brian pulled a little away from Annie and showed a sad smiled. He put his hand on Annie's face and stroked it with his ​​fingers. He approached her again and gave her a long kiss on her forehead.

"I don't know what to do, Annie. Honestly, I don't know. But once a very special person told me, 'if it was destiny, it will take care of the rest.'" - Annie smiled at his words. That person was her. - "But now... we need time, Annie."

Brian let Annie's hands and left the dining room, joining the rest of the group in the living room.
Annie stood leaning against the wall looking at all the corners of the room. Her gaze was empty again. Tears started running down her cheeks. She began to slide down, sitting on the floor. She leaned her head to her knees and stayed there for a few minutes.

However, in the living room, the group was talking about memories of adolescence and the experiences they had had. When Brian approaches, all eyes go to him.

"Where's Annie?" - Rita asked lifted up the couch.

"She needs some time alone."

"I'll see her."

"No!" - Brian said, holding her arm. - "She needs to think."

"Believe me, Brian. She needs me right now." - Rita left the room and went to the dining room.

Brian sits beside Zacky, resting his arms on his legs and crossing his fingers.

"Did you talk to her?" - Matt asked.

"Yes .."

"And..." - Tay said grabbing a cigarette.

"I'm sorry. I don't wanna talk about it, okay?"

However, Rita came into the dining room and found Annie wiping the tears from her face. When Annie saw Rita, she run to her and hugged her.

“I’m sorry, sis. Sorry to be a sad in a day I should be happy.”

“Shhh… I know you are happy for me. What did say Brian to you?”

“I don’t want to talk about it, I’m sorry. I just want to go home!”

“Okay… Let’s go to the toilet to wash your beautiful face and then you’ll go home.”

Annie and Rita went to the bathroom and moments later, they joined the group in the living room.

"I'm sorry, guy. I'm going home." - Brian quickly looked at Annie.

"Do you want the car keys?" - Tay said, looking for the keys in her suitcase.

"No. It's not necessary. I'll call a taxi."

"I'm going home too. You can go with me." - Brian stood up and walked over to Annie. - "It's late and it's dangerous to you walk alone in the street."

"Okay. Thank you, Brian."

Annie and Brian said goodbyes from their friends and left the Zacky's house. Into the car, Brian looked at Annie, leaning his head on the car seat. She looked at him too and he quickly looked away and started driving.

They didn't say a single word during the entire trip. Annie leaned her head on the car window until she fell asleep.

"Are you better, babygirl?" - Brian asked Annie getting no response from her. - "Annie? Annie?"

He looked at her and saw that she had fallen asleep. He smiled when he saw, once again, the woman of his life sleeping, right beside him.
However, they reached the house of Annie. Brian didn't want to wake Annie because he knew that if she woke up, hardly she fall asleep again. He took in her bag and pulled out the house's key. He left the car and walked to the other door. He opened the door, took Annie in his arms, and went to the front door of the house. With some difficulty, opened the door and took Annie to her room.

Brian went upstairs and getting Annie's bedroom, he opened the door with his foot. He came into the bedroom and remembered every moment he had with Annie. All moments of passion and love, every moment of tears and laughs. He approached the bed and lay Annie carefully. He took a blanket and placed it over her.
He sat beside her, stroking her hair. His fingers traveled her face, lips, neck, and arm. He just saw her sleeping, so peaceful and serene.

"I love you so much, babygirl. My life without you is nothing... you don't know how much I need you..." - Brian came over her and gave her a soft kiss on her lips. He lay beside her, watching her sleeping. That scene brought him many memories that tears started running in his face until he eventually fell asleep.

The next day, Annie woke up with a big headache. She began to move slowly and noticed that someone was holding her. She looked and saw a tattooed arm around her. Immediately she recognized that it was Brian. Slowly, she turned getting in front of him. She smiled when she saw him lying beside her. She put her hand on Brian's face and stroked it with her ​​delicate fingers. He moved a bit and feeling Annie beside him, pulled her to him. He opened his eyes and saw Annie. Their bodies were glued together. They stared at each other for a moment.

"I dreamed about you!" - Annie said, smiling.

"What did you dream?"

Annie was even closer Brian until their lips touched slowly. The kiss became more intense and passionate.
They became involved with each other. Brian grabbed Annie, pulling her against him. They kissed with increasing intensity. Annie's hands explored throughout the body of Brian. Brian began pulling her sweater, getting her with only the bra. They stopped kissing and looked at each other. Their breaths were very heavy. Annie turned to kiss Brian, trying to take his sweater off.

"Annie... We can't..." - Brian returned to the real world. They couldn't be doing that. He couldn't be involved with her. It was very hard to stop to him. Their love was so true. But for him, that relationship had no future. Brian gained courage and stopped kissing Annie grabbing on her wrists. - "We can't, Annie. I love you very much but we can't... I'm sorry..."

"Don't say that, Brian..." - Annie turned to kiss Brian and he couldn't avoid it and he kissed her too. He didn't want her to suffer. He stopped kissing Annie again; he got up from bed, took his sweatshirt and left the bedroom, running.