Hunt You Down All Nightmare Long

“I don’t want you to go on this hunt, damn it! I am not having it Lennox.”
I rolled my eyes and continued to clean one of the guns. “I’m the same age as Sam, Dean. I think I’m capable of making decisions like that on my own. And maybe I want to come cause they might know more about the guy who killed Alex.”
He jerked the gun out of my hands and put it back on his bed. “Yes you are and I know, but you’re pissed and upset and you can’t control yourself. You’ll end up killing yourself!”
“So what? I don’t have anything to live for anyway.” I started sharpening one of the knives that were in front of me.
Again he jerked it out of my hands, threw it back on the table and pinned my hands back on my lap before squatting down and looking me in the eye.
“Look at me and tell me that your brother and I aren’t a reason to keep fighting the pain. You made it three weeks so far and I honestly believe that you can make it last.”
“My husband and son fucking died, Dean. Don’t expect me to be all bubbly and happy, cause I can’t. Let me grieve the way I want to, and if that equals slicing up some possessed bastards, so be it. I know it’s what you did when dad died.”
“I still don’t want you do die like them, Nox. I bet that Alex-- that’s his name right?”
I nodded. “Well, I bet he didn’t want you to die because you want justice. Sure, he would like justice, but probably not justice in the way you want to go get it. And please don’t make me talk to you like this again, cause you’re 24 and I don’t like talking to you like you just stole a cookie from the freaking jar.” He got up and picked up the knife I was cleaning.
“But I got to admit, your kitchen skills are quite useful when it comes to sharpening knives. But you always were good with knives. Where did you get this one?” He asked as he smiled and started playing with the blade.
“I like them better than guns. I have more control over them,” I said with a shrug. “It’s Alex’, he kept it in the garage for when we went out camping. But seriously Dean, I am going on this hunt. You can’t ask me to stay in the freaking motel!”
He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “You’re still as stubborn as you used to be I notice.”
I smiled widely and took the knife from his hands. “And I’m proud of it.”
“But still,” he said. “You’re not going on this hunt.”
“Oh come on,” I whined. “I am a grown woman; I can handle a few demons.”
He sighed deeply and pulled his hair. “For fuck's sake Nox. I won’t have it. No way. I won’t lose you!” he said frustrated.
“I won’t get myself killed, Dean. It’s just a demon, nothing I haven’t handled before. Have some faith in your baby sis,” I tried to convince him.
“You’re reckless! You’ve been on a killing spree the past few days and it’s only a matter of time until it goes wrong and you die.”
“Are you saying that you and Sam can’t? Cause that’s just sexist.”
“The thing is that Sam and I aren’t grieving like you are at the moment, Lennox. And we already did that.”
“Did what?” I asked, not understanding where he was going.
“Die! I died. I went to hell and I got brought back.”
“What the fuck Dean!” I cried. “What the hell? Why haven’t you told me this before?! You are telling me what happened right fucking now, or god so help me I will carve your skin open with my knife.”
“I see you didn’t lose your lovely ladylike side when you got married,” he mumbled.
“Dean...” I growled.
He laughed and carefully took the knife from my hands and started telling me everything. Sam leaving for college, Dean and dad moving on, Dean losing dad and going out to look for him with Sam, to Sam’s girlfriend dying like mum had died, to Dean almost dying in the hospital and dad sacrificing his soul to safe him. By the time he reached that part of the story Sam walked in and Dean asked him to explain the rest. Sam sat down in front of me and slowly starting telling me about the demon blood, him dying and Dean selling his soul, which was how he ended up in hell and eventually got rescued by an angel called Castiel. I just sat there, listening to their story and taking everything that happened in the years that I was gone, wondering what went wrong along the way. Maybe this was also my fault.
Maybe I could’ve sacrificed my soul so dad didn’t have to die, which probably meant that they could’ve killed Azazel earlier in the story and they didn’t have to deal with this all. Maybe just have a happy family. Cause that’s what it sounded like to me. I was out playing house, which was almost forced upon me, but I was happy. But it was the happiness of one person compared to the happiness of three people and their partners. If dad didn’t abandon me, I could’ve been there for Sammy. I could’ve convinced him to stay in college. He would’ve been happily married and maybe have a kid. Just like I used to. If I wasn’t in the picture Alex would still be alive and he would have married another woman. He would have a kid. Flynn would never be born, so he didn’t have to suffer.
I swallowed and tried to push all the information aside. “Thanks for telling me,” I replied calmly. “Now can we go after those demons? I want more information about why they killed Alex.”



Sam and I stood back to back in the middle of the room, slowly circling around to watch for two of the demons we still had to kill. Sam stepped forward as he heard a creaking noise in the other room and silently started walking towards the door.
“Idiot,” I muttered as I turned around to keep my eyes all over the room to protect him. Suddenly I heard quick footsteps, so I turned around only to see a short, female demon running towards Sam with a knife in her hands.
“You’re welcome,” I said as I stabbed a demon in the neck with the demon killing knife. The body dropped on the floor and the blood dripped from the open wound. I felt completely emotionless as I watched it bleed. “How many left?” I asked Sam as I smeared the blood that was on the knife onto the couch.
“When we entered there were five of them. You killed two, so did I, so that leaves Dean with another o-”
His sentence got cut off by an ear piercing scream coming from upstairs, which caused me and Sam to run up the stairs with the speed of light.
Sam kicked open the door and pointed the gun around, eventually finding Dean safely standing out the reach of the demon, who was tied up in a chair in the middle of a devil’s trap.
“Now are you going to tell me why you went after Alex Williams?” he asked slowly, playing with the bottle of holy water that he was holding. “Answer the damn question!”
The woman in the chair screamed in pain as he threw more water towards her. “I told you, I don’t know! Please don’t,” she begged.
“I think she’s serious Dean,” I said as he got ready to throw more water. “She has a boss and she doesn’t know what she was doing. Just kill her already.”
He took the knife from my hands and stabbed her in her heart. “That’s done. None of them had any information about who killed your husband or why. I’m sorry Nox.”
I shrugged. “It’s okay I guess. Five demons down, just another shitload to go. We’ll find the bastard, I’m sure.”
I knew I was going to get my answers, even if it will take my entire life. I would get them.