The Opportunity Has Just Begun

So much was going on during game I couldn't find any time to just focus. I kept thinking about Adam and if he really was ok or if it was just a brave face he was putting on for me. Even Geno, I wanted to know so badly if anything would ever come of us or if one of my best friends would never be there again. Then on top of it I was being hit from pillar to post, missed every single shot I tried to take and being yelled at by coach like there wouldn't be another game.

“Cam you just got to stay focused,” Sid tapped my shaking leg as the adrenaline pumped through my body beginning to get the better of me as I tried to calm down on the bench.
“I can't!” I slammed the head of my stick down onto the boards a little shocked when I heard a crack.
Dan looked at me with wide eyes, and if looks cold I would be dead a thousand times over. I really had hit his bad side for good this time around.

I peeled the tape back on the blade of my stick and noticed a large crack running along the base.
“You did it now?” Heinze our equipment manager lent over my shoulder putting another one of my sticks in front of me, “here.”
I took the stick and handed him the now useless and broken stick before turning my attention back to the game.

10 minutes left, that was all we had and the game would be over and I couldn't wait to get back to the hotel, crawl into bed and sleep. My mind was far from on the game.

“Geno your line!” Dan called, “except you Cam, sit! Brandon go!” Dan put his hands on my shoulder's and pushed me down onto the bench not giving me any other chance but to sit, “you aren't touching that ice until you can prove to me that you are focused.”

I didn't the ice for the rest of the game, I sat there on the bench watching, wishing I hadn't let my anger get to me. I knew I wasn't playing my game but I really couldn't find it in me to care.

I ignored everyone's eyes in the locker room, I ignored Dan's glare throughout his speech, I ignored everyone.

Sure we ended up beating the Rangers but I wasn't part of the win. I hadn't scored, I hadn't got an assist, I didn't even help with any forward movement. I was rendered useless.

I was rather pathetic when it came to break ups, it didn't even have to be my own and I still felt horrible for all parties involved. This though was my own doing and it certainly didn't make it any easier, in fact I was feeling worse than the last time I got dumped.

I had managed to keep myself together on the way back to the hotel but the moment I saw Geno sitting outside my room against the door in the hall my emotions hit me like a ton of bricks. Tears were rolling down my cheeks before I even had a chance to really register how I was feeling.

“Cam?” he scrambled to his feet and looked at me with concern all over his face.
“I am fine Geno,” I tried to wave him off but failed miserably as he caught my flailing hands.
“What happened?” he moved my hands so I couldn't cover my face.

There was no use me trying to hide anything from Geno, I couldn't block him out no matter how much I thought I wanted to it just wouldn't happen.

“I broke up with Adam,” I sighed letting a few more tears escape.
“What?” his voice quietened to almost whisper with disbelief as his grip loosened on my wrists and his hands slowly let go, “because of...”
“Sort of,” I muscled past him so I could get into my room.
“But he, you two... I am sorry,” he stood in the door way looking down at his feet.
“It's ok,” I kicked my shoes off and sat on the edge of the bed, “we just weren't working, the distance sucked, our schedules are too hectic, there was never any time to see each other and between you and me he is not very good at Army of Two,” I wiped away the few tears forcing their way onto my cheeks even though I didn't really know why I was crying anymore.
“Cam,” he chuckled, “can stay sad if want.”
“Believe me it's taking a lot not to keep crying,” I sniffled as he walked over and sat down next to me.
“I am sorry,” he gingerly slipped his hand around my back, “is ok for hug?”
“Yes you idiot, hugging is fine,” I laughed wrapping my arms around him and holding on tighter than I expected to let myself.

I had made the decision to end it with Adam for numerous reasons on my own. Evgeni kissing me was a part of that but it wasn't everything, sure it made me realize that Adam wasn't the one I wanted to be with and that maybe someday Geno would be there. He was one of my best friends and I never wanted to risk losing that again. So I was going to be one of those ridiculous girls who was going to wait around for it to happen, because I would rather be alone than be with someone who did make me truly happy.