My City

“Happy birthday dear Seattle! Happy birthday to you!” Seattle giggled as Ben set the cake, made to look like the Seattle skyline, right in front of her. She smiled up at him, standing and wrapping her arms around his strong shoulders as he gripped her just as tightly. Her small apartment was empty except for the two of them, Ben insisting he wanted the birthday girl all to himself.

“Ben, this is beautiful, did you make it yourself?” She asked, letting go of him. He chuckled, rubbing the back of his head.

“I did my best. Probably why the space needle is jacked.” She looked down to see the trademark of Seattle was horribly lopsided, but to her it was perfect. She turned back to him, a beaming smile on her face.

“I think it’s amazing Ben.”

“Well you might want to taste it before you get too excited.” She giggled, sitting back down as Ben took the seat beside her. He watched in anticipation as she cut out a small sliver, which caused him to chuckle.

“What?”

“It’s your Birthday Sea, you can have more than a sliver.” Her smile dropped the smallest bit, but Ben caught it. “What?”

“Well I just…” She stopped, chewing her lower lip. Ben’s hand immediately shot out, resting on top of hers. He watched the pink snake it’s way up her cheeks as she slowly looked at him. And as their eyes met he felt like a static charge had ripped through him. He then immediately cleared his throat, pulling his hand back. There was a long, tense silence before finally Seattle spoke again.

“It’s nothing.”

“Sea, come on, you can talk to me.” Seattle started gnawing her lower lip, her eyes on the floor.

“I just always feel so fat when Trisha is around. That’s all.” She whispered. “I mean, the girl is flawless.” Ben looked at her for a long time, watching as her eyes moved sadly over her cake. “I can run five days a week and starve myself and I don’t lose a fucking pound. And she has that perfect hair and she’s so beautiful and-”

“Seattle.” She looked up only to see the perfect, pale blue of Ben’s eyes and felt the heat snake up to her cheeks again. He reached over, setting a hand on her arm with a soft smile. “You’re beautiful too.” He reached out, hesitating halfway before he drew his hand back. “I mean, why do you think guys are breaking down your door all the time?”

“I guess.” She murmured. Ben sighed, grabbing a plate before slicing a massive slice of cake for himself.

“Well, eat as much as you want. It’s probably shit anyway.” The two chuckled, and Ben was thankful he’d relieved some of the tension in the room as Seattle took her first bite before her eyes flew to Ben’s.

“Chocolate cake with raspberry filling.” She whispered.

“Your favorite.” He smiled. She just shook her head, a huge smile lighting up her face.

“How did you…?”

“I have been to your birthday party every year for twenty-four years. You think I wouldn’t remember?”

“You were at my fifth birthday party?” She asked, taking another bite. Ben nodded.

“I remember Chloe Hamilton and Katie Ruben tried to dress me up like a princess and you told them to stop.” He said, turning to her with a huge grin. “And right then and there I swore to myself that I would always have your back like you’d had mine.” Seattle blushed as Ben scooted closer, gripping her tightly.

She was a bit stunned at first, but gripped him back, letting herself melt into his strong frame as she buried her face in his chest. They stayed like that for a long time, and Seattle knew it was better than whatever present Ben could have brought her. But all too soon he pulled away, leaving her feeling cold and alone. But when she saw his perfect smile it was completely worth it.

“So, presents.” He said. He shot up, grabbing his jacket and walking back over before pulling out two small, thin presents. She looked up at him, and he simply grinned. “I always manage to find a shitty present, but now with Heist selling so much, I could get you something besides a broken keyboard.”

“Ben, you didn’t have to get me anything.”

“I know.” He said, smiling softly. She chuckled, taking the two small presents from him. She decided to start with the bigger of the two, picking at the pink wrapping paper until she uncovered a piece of plastic. She looked up at Ben, who kept smiling, as she pulled away the paper to reveal the new Christina Perri CD. She smiled up at Ben, a look of awe on her face.

“Open it.” He whispered.

She cocked an eyebrow at him before she slowly opened the case, revealing a small note written on the song sheet inside the sleeve.



Seattle’s jaw about hit the floor as she looked at Ben with huge eyes. “Open the other one.” He insisted. She took the small, thin package in her hands, wondering what else he could have gotten her as she slowly slid down the paper. But the moment she saw the sliver of card protector she knew. She tugged down the wrapping to reveal Ken Griffey Jr. smiling at her. She looked up to Ben, who was beaming.

“Happy birthday Seattle.” He murmured. She shot up, gripping him tightly again.

“Ben, this is the best thing I could have ever asked for.”

“The Christina Perri tickets?” She looked up, shaking her head.

“Getting to know a guy like you for my entire life.” He blushed as she hugged him again, breathing in his scent. And in that one moment, in her shitty apartment, surrounded by cake and the perfect gifts, Seattle knew she must have died and gone to heaven. Because to her, there was no better place on Earth then in Ben’s arms.



Seattle let out a shaky breath as she sat in the hospital bed, looking up at Ben with tears in her eyes. He wasn’t as strong however as tears rolled down his cheeks. He pressed his lips together, taking her pale, shaky hand in his as she started coughing again.

“This whole time.” He finally whispered. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was scared.” She whispered, gently setting her other hand over his. “I was so scared you would reject me, that I would lose you.”

“But now I’m going to lose you.” He whispered.

“I’m so sorry Ben.” She murmured. “I just… I couldn’t see you with her. I couldn’t watch you two grow old together and love each other. I couldn’t bear to live knowing I’d lost you to her.”

“Sea…” Ben murmured. He leaned down, pressing his forehead to hers and cradling her cheek in his hand. “You never would have lost me. You’re my city, and even if I do love Trisha, you and me have some things that she and I never will. We have the treehouse and the river and we have Griffey, we had so much Seattle.”

“But she had one thing I never could seem to get.” With that Seattle weakly raised her arm, setting her hand over Ben’s chest and letting his heartbeat lull her closer to that last time she would close her eyes.

“There’s one problem with that Seattle.” He whispered. He set his hand over hers, keeping her hand on his chest. “I have always loved you.” Seattle’s eyes grew wide as Ben pressed his lips together, trying to fight back hysteria. “You’re my home.” He watched as she smiled softly at him, and in that one moment, she was his Seattle again.

He saw their entire life together flash before his eyes, and what they could have been. He saw their Christmases together, him proposing, the wedding, two kids and a house on lake Washington. One had his strawberry blonde hair, but both had Seattle’s huge brown eyes. He saw them growing old together, laying side by side in a hospital bed just like this one, both of them moving on to whatever came next with their hands held together tightly.

As he came back to the girl before him he couldn’t control it anymore as he gripped her tightly, trying to keep her with him. “Why Seattle?” He choked out. “We could have been everything together.” He felt her hand wipe away one of her tears and pulled away, watching as she smiled softly at him.

“Maybe in another life Ben.” She murmured. She reached up, running her fingers weakly through his hair. “Can you bring my parents in now? I’m ready to say goodbye.”

“Don’t say goodbye Seattle.” He pleaded. “Stay here, with me. I promise I’ll do everything I didn’t. I’ll take you wherever you want to go, just stay with me.” But she just softly shook her head.

“It’s my time Ben. You’ll see me again someday, I promise.” She leaned up, pressing her lips softly to his. “But right now I need to say goodbye.” Ben nodded before standing, making his way over to the door and opening it to see Seattle’s parents.

“She’s ready to see you.” He whispered. They nodded, walking back in with Ben as Mrs. Mason ran to her daughter, gripping Seattle’s hand. Mr. Mason just slowly walked over, he was trying to stay calm, but Ben could see his hands shaking. Ben took the cue to give them a moment and stepped out into the hallway, running his fingers through his hair.

He felt like he was going to vomit again as he remembered the almost vision he had gotten of his and Seattle’s life. If he had done just one thing differently, stayed after Ryan’s Christmas party, ran after her the day he relapsed, she would be alive. She would be with him and she would be alive. He felt the hot tears pour down his cheeks again as she slid down to the floor, crying over what he knew was true love that he had thrown away.

Finally the door opened again and he looked up to see Mrs. Mason. She took one look at Ben before sitting beside him, gripping him tightly. He could feel her tears on his shirt, but didn’t fight her away. “They’re going over her will and what she wants to do for the service.” She choked out. “I don’t know how Louis can do it, just listen to our baby talk about where she wants her ashes spread.”

“It’s okay Mrs. Mason.” Ben tried, gripping her and allowing the small woman to crumble in his arms. The two stayed outside for what felt like hours before Mr. Mason gently took his wife’s arm, saying that Seattle wanted to see Ben again.

Ben knew this meant this was really the end. She was going to die and that was going to be the last of it. He would never get to hold Seattle again, never tell her she was beautiful or fall asleep with her in his arms. And as he walked into the hospital room he felt like it was his own deathbed.

Seattle looked up as he sat beside her, her eyes showing the smile that her ever fading body couldn’t anymore. “Ben.” She murmured. He leaned in closer, trying to keep from crying again as a tear rolled down her cheek. “Please take care of them for me.”

“I will.” He reached out, taking her small hand in his as she struggled to keep breathing.

“And Ben?”

“Yes?” He watched as she slowly smiled, tears sliding out of her swollen eyes.

“I wouldn’t take back a single second.” He felt a tear slide down his face as he leaned down, looking into her eyes, watching the color slowly start to fade.

“I love you Seattle Mason.”

“I…love…you…too.” She choked out. He saw how much pain she was in as he leaned down, pressing his forehead to hers and giving her a soft kiss.

“It’s okay Seattle, you can let go now.” He whispered. With that he watched as her eyes fluttered shut, feeling her last breath roll over his skin before the heart monitor let out a shrill whine, confirming Ben’s fears that he was finally alone.