We Are the Lovers, We Are the Last of Our Kind

Tonight we were going to sneak out. I was so fucking scared, not because we were going to sneak out, but because I was petrified that I would do something stupid again. And I'm not sure if Vic and I's relationship could handle anymore of my mess up's. So far I was the only one who has messed up. I lied about my eating disorder and I cheated. I was such a fuck up. What if I was no better than Dylan?

"Hey Kells get up, lets go chill in my room" Alan said getting up and walking away as I followed " Did you hear? Tony found where the counselors have been keeping our luggage. We're going to change into some other clothes for tonight. I'm so excited!"

"D-Damn, he really knows how to figure shit out. First s-sneaking out, then finding our luggage," Alan nodded happily, "D-Do you know where V-Vic is? I haven't seen him since breakfast," I asked entering his room and curling up into a ball on his bed.

"Um right after breakfast I passed by Jaime's room and they were in there."

"Oh."

Of fucking course. I was extremely paranoid and insecure and Vic always being around Jaime made it even worse. I was also concerned about his safety around Jaime because he had a history of skipping his meds. I wonder how it'd feel to skip my medication. I know it'd be hell so I wouldn't even try it. My anxiety would probably be off the charts. And I'd probably start seeing crazy shit like I used to.

"I can tell you don't like Jaime," Alan said bouncing over to his drawer full of food him and Austin hid in their room and pulled out a candy bar.

"Well he's in l-love with my b-boyfriend and he's huge competition for me since he's actually g-good looking."

"Kellin you have nothing to worry about. Have you seen the way Vic looks at you? He's so in love with you and it's adorable," Alan squealed.

I shrugged my shoulders and let my bangs fall in my face.

"I'm j-just scared because h-he's becoming such a huge p-part of my life and if he leaves I don't know what I'll do."

"You just have to take chances. At first I worried about the same thing with Austin but then I realized that if I didn't take a chance I would never know what we could become. I've known him since we were 2. We grew up together. Even when we were little we used to hold hands and kiss on the cheek. We had no idea what we were doing but it just felt right. After we lost our virginities to each other when we were 15 we both knew we were in the relationship for the long run."

"I think V-Vic and I could have a love like that if I just don't screw up anymore."

"Kells, you're going to screw up hun. It's a part of being in a relationship. Wanna know something?"
I nodded.

"When I was 16 I cheated on Austin 4 times. I was confused about what I wanted and he found out. He was crushed, I had never seen him that mad. We broke up but we kept coming back to each other. Sometimes it got so bad that we got into physical altercations at like 3 in the morning. But one day a fight got so bad that after we beat the shit out of each other we just sat there and cried. We realized that we didn't wanna live that way anymore. We learned to vocalize our problems and work things out with words."

"I w-would have never known, you guys a-are so in love," I whispered.

"Yea, but love can make you do some crazy things."

~~~~~~~~~~~

I went back to my room after talking with Alan for another hour. On my way to the room I glanced over and saw Vic and Jaime in Jaime's room. Jaime was laying down and Vic was sitting in the chair next to the desk. At least Vic wasn't on his bed. He didn't even notice I passed by.

I got in bed and pulled the covers over my head in hopes that I would fall asleep. I woke up to sloppy kisses being placed on my neck. I slowly opened my eyes and came to my senses.

"Vic, b-baby what are you doing?"

"Nothing," he mumbled, straddling me while continuing to kiss my neck.

"I c-couldn't find you. What have y-you been up to?"

He stopped kissing me and looked up.

"I was hanging out with Jaime."

I just nodded and looked away.

"Babe every time I say his name you get that look on your face."

"I don't wanna talk about him," I said pulling Vic back down to kiss me again.

I swear his lips were addicting. The kiss was starting to get a little heated when Vic pulled away for air.

"Those little moans you make when we make out are so adorable," Vic chuckled.

"O-Oh my god. Those are s-so embarrassing. don't bring a-attention to them," I gasped while blushing.
He just laughed and kissed my nose.

"So a-about tonight, do you t-think we should go?" I asked.

"Only if you're comfortable babe."

"I'm just a little s-scared. What if I f-f-fuck up again?"

"Don't worry about that Kells. Just please try to stay away from the alcohol."

I nodded and avoided his gaze. I still felt so guilty and ashamed.

"Hey, remember the past is the past. We've moved on from that," he said looking me in the eyes.

It was amazing how good he made me feel about myself even though I hurt him. I slowly leaned in to kiss him.

"I l-love you," I said against his lips.

"I love you too," he replied happily.

~~~~~~
The date was amazing, we walked around in the city. The nightlife was incredible. It was much better than going to a club like the others were doing. We were dropped off there and we were supposed to meet them back there in 3 hours.We were now at an abandoned playground, it was pitch dark and Vic and I were on the swing set.

“T-Tonight was perfect,” I said looking over to Vic.

“I agree," Vic said smiling back at me, " lets go lay on the jungle gym and look at the stars."

He took my hand and led me over to the jungle gym. We laid down next to each other and I put my head on his chest. We were looking at the stars and we could hear giggles and whispering from the slides, where Alan and Austin were.

"Wait till we get back to our room," I heard Austin growl to Alan.

I wanted to laugh but I held it to myself.

"Looks like someone's getting laid tonight," Vic laughed quietly.

I giggled and kissed his neck a little. I wondered when we'd be doing the same. I didn't want to rush it though, sex was a touchy subject for Vic since his ex forced him into sex many times. So I could wait as long as he needed. But maybe we could still get each other off occasionally. That would help with the sexual frustration I had been feeling recently. Maybe after we got out of the asylum we would be able to have our first time, if we stay together.

"How long d-do you think t-this will last?" I asked.

"You mean our relationship?"

I nodded.

"As long as you want it to love," he said playing with my hair.

"Even after w-we get out of the asylum?"

"Of course. Just because we're going to be in a different setting doesn't mean that my feelings for you will change."

Hearing him say that gave me a sense of reassurance. I've never felt more comfortable around anyone in my life.

"You're so beautiful," Vic whispered in my ear, nibbling on it a little bit afterwards.

“So are you,” I said smiling.

~~~~~~~~~~

After a while we walked back to the club and saw everyone waiting outside for the cars to arrive to take up back to the asylum. Mostly everyone was hammered. Vic and I stood a little bit away from everyone just enjoying each others company.

“Vickkkkyyy,” I heard Jaime say from behind us, he sounded drunk as fuck.

Vic turned around to face Jaime.

“I missssed you tonight,” he said pulling him in for a hug and holding him there for more time than necessary.

Vic just smiled and nodded. Jaime looked over at our hands that were laced together and rolled his eyes.

“Ohhhhh look at the happy fucking couple. You knowww, you’re so fucking stupid for getting back with that whore,” Jaime slurred at Vic as he pointed his hand in my face.

“G-Get your hand out of my fucking face,” I said slapping his hand away.

“What are you gonna do about it?” he asked getting extremely close to my face, “You think you’re hot shit because you have him, but he wantsss me. You know it and I know it. So tell me, what are you gonna do?”

Looks like I’m going to have to fight.