We Are the Lovers, We Are the Last of Our Kind

It’s been two weeks and Kellin won’t even look at me. Ever since that kiss with Jaime he has been acting really weird and jumpy when either of us are around. As for Jaime, he has been extremely touchy, I’ve even had to shake him off of me a few times. I liked Kellin and I think Jaime knew it too, he just didn’t want to accept it for some reason. I wanted things to go back to how they were before Jaime kissed me, him being my best friend and Kellin being the incredibly cute guy that I may have had a chance with.

“Vic,” Jaime said interrupting my thoughts,“lets go get some lunch.”

I didn’t nod or anything to let him know I heard him, I just looked at him. He was leaning particularly close to my face and rubbing my stomach in a circular motion. See what I meant about being touchy?

“You seem a little hungry. We have a full body inspection in a week and if they see you’ve lost weight they’re gonna watch you closely.”

I thought about that and nodded, getting up from my bed. Jaime instantly took my hand and lead me to the cafeteria. We have been getting a lot of looks from the other patients, they probably have heard about our kiss. Word travels fast around here, there are only 23 of us. There was no hate though, that I know of, because there were other couples in the asylum, like Alex and Jack, Austin and Alan, Andy and Ashley and Ben and Danny. The only thing was, I didn’t people to think i was in a relationship with Jaime, I wanted Kellin.

Jaime and I sat in our corner he chatted away as I choked down my food, with all of the thinking I’ve been doing I had been eating so little. I shoved a forkful of pasta in my mouth as he continued to talk.

“Babe, slow down, you’re getting it on your face.” he giggled leaning forward with his napkin to wipe the sauce off.

Whoah, he called me babe, I needed to talk about this with him tonight. I just didn’t know how. I looked over and saw Kellin looking at us. I quickly motioned with my hand for him to come over and sit with us but he just bucked his eyes wider and looked down at his food, softly picking at it and putting some in his mouth. I sighed, looking down and finishing the last of my pasta. Jaime saw that I was done and pushed his plate towards me.

“I’m not hungry, I had a big breakfast.” he said twirling a piece of my hair between his fingers.

I didn’t ask any questions and took his plate.

After leaving the cafeteria we went to the main room to watch a movie with some of the other patients, Jaime knew I hated social interaction but convinced me to tag along.

All of the couples that were in here were paired up on the couch snuggling together. I saw Kellin in the corner of the room on the floor scribbling in his note book. I wanted so bad for me and Kellin to be cuddling right now, but there was no chance since he wouldn’t even look at me. I miss his cute little voice, the way he stutters and messes with his sleeves on his shirt. I even miss the way he blinks too much when he’s nervous, which was 99% of the time.

“Vic come sit.” Jaime said while patting the seat next to him on the couch.

I sat next to him and he quickly laid down and put his head in my lap. We sat there for 2 hours. Throughout the movie I kept looking over at Kellin, his eyes stayed glued to his notebook but I’m pretty sure he could feel my eyes on him. Once he couldn’t take it anymore his eyes snapped up to meet mine. I really needed to talk to him. I shifted and Jaime looked up, I gave him the one minute sign and stood up and walked over to Kellin. He stood as he saw me coming near him, he looked at me with nervous eyes. I put my hands on his hips and whispered lightly in his ear.

“I need to talk to you,” I said so lightly that it was impossible for anyone else but him to hear.

“O-Ok.”

I was going to do it tonight, but I needed a way to get out of the room because the doors automatically locked at 10:00pm.

“I’ll come to your room tonight, leave a sock in between the door so it doesn’t lock all the way.”

He nodded and looked down. With that I gave him one last squeeze that made him make the cutest little noise. I looked into his eyes again and walked away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jaime and I were laying down on my bed side by side. He was going on about how we could start a band when we get out of here. I wasn’t really paying attention, I was thinking about what to say to Kellin tonight.

“Are you even listening?” Jaime said propping himself up on an elbow.

I nodded in response giving him a fake smile.

“Liar,” he smirked.

Without warning he hovered over me and lightly pressed his lips to mine. This felt wrong, I didn’t want this. I pushed him away gently. He had a hurt and puzzled look on his face. I went to the desk and grabbed my notebook and wrote.

(Vic) I’m sorry, this doesn't feel right.

“What do you mean?” He said, his bottom lip quivering.

(Vic) Jaime, you’re my best friend and you have been ever since I’ve been here. But the problem is, that’s all I want you to be. The touching and the kissing has to stop. I have someone else here that I have really strong feelings for. And now him and I are on rough terms because of what’s been going on with us. I just want us to go back to being best friends like we always have been.

He read it slowly and his eyes started watering. Oh fuck.

“It’s Kellin.” he said more as a statement than a question.

I nodded.

“What’s so good about him? Vic, I’m so much better for you. He just got here. I’ve had feelings for you months before you even knew he existed. Then he comes in here and just takes you away. He’s just like your ex Vic, he’s going to hurt you. I wouldn't do that though, you know me. I can give you more than he can.” He said in a forceful tone.

(Vic) I’m sorry Jaime, you know I love you as my best friend, that’s it. I don’t have that kind of a connection with you, please just be my best friend again. We don’t have to make this hard.

That was when the tears spilled over and I started to see anger in his eyes. I felt guilt wash over me, what had I done?

“I’ve been here for you the whole fucking time!” Jaime yelled.

He punched the wall. Holy shit, I didn’t know he would be this angry.

“Vic, he’s going to hurt you.”

I just shook my head in response.

“That little big-eyed tramp!” he shouted

I’m glad Kellin wasn’t in his room at the moment because if he was he would have heard this whole thing. I felt like crying, but I don’t cry in front of people so I tried my best to hold it in.

“He’s going to hurt you, and when he does I’m going to be here to pick up the pieces, he’s just like you ex, he’s going to beat you and make you his slave. You’re going to cry every night because of him. You won’t even be able to escape him when you’re asleep because he’ll be in your nightmares,” he said, his words piercing me like a knife.

I gave him a blank stare and walked briskly to the bathroom. Once I got in a stall I locked the door and cried. He went too far, he mentioned my worst fears. Kellin couldn’t be like my ex, there’s no way. He’s a sweet and adorable and loving. I stayed in the stall for about 15 minutes, when I gathered myself enough to come out I walked into our room and saw Jaime sitting on his bed reading. Tears stained his cheeks and his eyes were red just like mine. He looked up at me with a hard expression then looked down. I wanted my best friend back. I walked over to my bed and sat down, putting my headphones in and blasting La Dispute.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was 11:00pm. Everyone was asleep except Kellin and I, he put the sock in the door just like I asked him to. I was happy that I would be able to talk to him alone since Tony had snuck out of the asylum for a night on the town. He did this on a regular basis, I had no idea how, but no one asked questions.

I slipped out of my door and replaced the sock I put there so I would be able to get back in. I crossed the hall quickly and went to Kellins room, closing the door gently behind me.

“Hi,” he squeaked.

“Hi,” I whispered back.

“Y-you can sit if you want,” he said patting the space next to him on his bed.

I sat down and just looked at him. He took my breath away with his gorgeous features.

“L-look Vic I’m sorry I have been acting weird these past few weeks but-” he paused and took a sharp breath, his nervousness was getting the best of him,“ I-I’m sorry. I-It’s just hard being around you when you're with Jaime, you’re all lovey dovey and it bothers me because... well because I have feelings for you and I thought you had feelings for me but I guess I was wrong because I accidentally walked in on you and Jaime,” he rushed, looking down.

“What?” I said still in shock that he just said he had feelings for me.

“N-Nothing, forget about it,” he said standing up and pacing the room.

“No, say it again,” I said getting up and grabbing him by the shoulders to get him to stop pacing.

“I have feelings for you,” he said slower.

Without saying anything I pulled him into a tight hug, one full of genuine happiness.

“W-What was that for?” He blushed giving me a little smile.

“I have feelings for you too.”