Caged Birds Don't Like to Sing

Jackson was still in the bathroom when I went back in there. I reached around him and picked up my toothbrush. I walked back into my room and stuffed that into the bag as well. On my way to the bathroom, yet again, I placed my bag outside of the door.

“How much longer are you going to be?” I impatiently asked, practically hovering over him.

“Not much. Why?” He asked as he rinsed off the razor again. This time he was shaving down his jaw line, making sure not to touch his chin or around his mouth area.

“I want to take a bath before we go.”

He looked up at me through the mirror again. A small smile grew on his face. As he nodded his head off in the direction of the tub, he said, “You can go in right now.”

I sneered, “Hell no.”

He sniggered. “I wouldn’t look.”

“Just hurry.”

After a minute or so, he announced, “I’m done.” I sighed with relief and closed the door quickly behind him. Right before I could even walk to the tub, Jackson knocked at the door. “Do you have a towel?

Already in the midst of stripping, I hopped over as I tried to take off my jeans. Then I clicked on the water. Not paying attention to the situation, I shoved my clothes in the hamper. Along with some other random articles on the ground.

I looked around for a towel. There wasn’t one to be found. I hesitated to answer. I just wanted to bathe and get it over with. “Uh... no. I don’t.” But I quickly added in, “But I got it handled. Don’t worry.”

“I can just grab you one,” he offered.

“It’s fine. I insist.” I looked over at the bathwater that was barely filling up, then back at the door.

After a couple of seconds, the door knob jiggled. “Quit it!” I shouted. “I don’t need a towel.”

“I think you do. Are you already undressed?”

I looked over at the hamper and debated on whether or not I should just grab my clothes out of there. But I had already tossed some wet towels and Jackson’s clothing in there. Not digging those out. “Yeah.”

He thought for a second. “Get in the tub. I’ll toss the towel in.”

“It’s not even filled up.” Why are these things so slow? I dipped my foot in and, of course, the water was cold. “Seriously,” I grumbled under my breath.

“How about I just leave it outside of the door?” Jackson offered. I thought about it. I didn’t want to have to run out in the hallway naked. Then I’d have to clean up puddles all over the bathroom from walking around dripping wet. Plus, I’d be freezing.

I took my arm and laid it across my chest. I hid behind the door and unlocked it. “I’m behind the door. Don’t come in.” I started to open it. His hand flew in with the cloth in his grasp. I grabbed it and pushed his hand back out. Then closed the door and locked it behind him.

“Thanks,” I sighed. Glad that ordeal was over.

“No problem.” I heard his footsteps walk off.

During the bath, I shifted around to reach for some soap when I heard a small crack. I didn’t think too much of it and I kept reaching down. Once I grabbed the bottle, I slipped back into my original spot. There was a louder crack this time. This time, I leaned over to see nothing out of the ordinary.

After I sunk back into the water, something made a loud snap. The whole tub tipped over in one direction. Water flew out and over my whole face as I fell back. My head hit the toilet with a clunk.

I think I blacked out for a second. But when I opened my eyes back up, I was gasping for air. Water filled my mouth. I coughed as I cussed under my breath in anger and confusion. I held my head in my hands and massaged it gently. It throbbed in pain. I guess I had a bigger mess to worry about rather than just puddles.

I slipped around on the wet and soapy floor in an attempt to get up. There was a loud knock at the door and the handle jiggled again.

“Marissa, are you okay? What happened?” Jackson exclaimed in a worried tone. “Let me in.”

“Hold on,” I called back, grabbing my towel. I tied it around me and opened the door. He came in immediately, looked at the mess and then back up at me. He looked shocked.

“What did you do?” He blurted out.

“Nothing!” I insisted. I followed him carefully to the scene. Jackson lifted the tub up to see what happened. I pointed at the missing lion paw. I reached around him and found it. I held it firmly in my hand. “See? I didn’t do anything. It cracked off.”

“How?” he baffled. He took the part from me and examined it.

“I don’t know. I wouldn’t have broke it while I was in there. I fell out.”

He looked up and me then did a double take. “Yeesh, you did.”

“What?”

He walked past me and got a towel he pressed it to my head quickly and pulled it back to show me. The towel was saturated in blood. I groaned and touched the wound. My hand quickly became crimson as well. I squeaked and wiped some more blood off of my forehead.

“You might have a concussion,” Jackson noted. He looked at my eyes to see my pupils. “Just take it easy today. And don’t sleep until tonight.”

I nodded and started to push him out of the bathroom so I could continue to get ready.

“Hurry up!” Jackson scowled from the outside of the door. I curled my last piece of hair.

“I’m done, I’m done. Don’t get your panties in a knot,” I taunted as I unplugged the curling iron and opened the door. “Let’s go.”

I was already dressed and ready. I didn’t really care if it was a long drive, I didn’t want to be rushed to get ready once we were at the hotel.

We all piled into the car. I was in the very back, a.k.a the trunk. It was the kind that if you crawled over the back seat, you’d be in it. Jackson offered to go back there with me along with Lani, the band manager. She was very sweet and we talked for a bit. Jackson didn’t say much before he nodded off. I didn’t blame him. We’re going to be awake for a while.

The drive didn’t seem too long. I talked with the people who were in the seats right in front of me. That included Will, Ben Graupner, and Jerad. The three of them were very funny and we all laughed quite a few times. Ben even said something along the lines of, ‘I don’t know why Jackson complained about you before. I think you’re pretty cool.’ I scoffed a bit at that comment. I said something like, ‘We just like to bicker too much. He can’t handle it.’ He laughed at that.

By the way, Will has produced a few of 100 Monkeys’s music videos. He also is performing in one of their songs by the name of ThWilla. Jackson made sure I knew all of this information before I left the house.

Good thing I got ready while I was still at home. Because by the time we got there it was already time for them to arrive at the venue. It was a pretty big place that had a stage over in the back. We walked through a bar and down three steps before we got to an open area for people to stand. Then the boys hopped on the stage. I watched them do a quick sound check before the people started piling in.

I went to sit at the bar while some opening acts played a few songs. I didn’t drink anything besides cola since I was under twenty-one and didn’t have an I.D. even. Once the band was on stage, I decided to get a little closer.

I just didn’t want to be with the mob around the stage. So I kind of laid low in the back behind everyone. I could still see everything clearly.

They started off playing a few songs. I smiled when I saw Jackson dance on stage during a couple of them as he sang. It was nice they actually got involved with the audience and had fun with each other, laughing and talking between songs. All five of the guys seemed to be enjoying the whole thing. I could tell they loved performing.

What surprised me was the fact that they all could come up with an improv song so fast. I guess it was some sort of ‘ritual.’ At every show, they’d let the audience pick a topic for them to sing a song about. Everyone mobbed even more when Jerad hopped off the stage and tried to get a clear response. I don’t know how he could hear anything. I couldn’t even hear myself think.

Once Jerad was hopped back on stage, he took the mic stand. “The title of tonight’s improv is....” Ben Johnson started tapping a drum roll. Then Jerad announced, “Brown eyes.”

I watched as all the girls went mad. Especially this one, she was bouncing like crazy. I heard her shout louder than the crowd a few times. She screamed, “That was mine! That was mine!” I smirked at her enthusiasm. It must feel spectacular to have someone in a band you like to notice you. Or just have someone you idolize notice you. I, myself, had never been one to rave about celebrities. Especially not these guys on stage.

As the beat got started on the drums from Ben Johnson, the lights dimmed out. Ben Graupner tapped on the keyboard to match the music that was building up. It amused me greatly to see everything fall into place for a song.

I kind of listened to the lyrics. I couldn’t hear very much. Right after Jackson sang anything during this song in particular, the crowd would shriek. I had a feeling it was something suggestive that made most of them blush and some of them fantasize. I watched him roam around stage and stick out his hand so everyone could touch him.They almost passed out afterwards. I rolled my eyes. Yeah, you guys can take him. He’s a pain in the butt when he’s at home.

Besides that thought, however, I saw a whole new part of Jackson as he played on stage. He seemed more alive and frivolous. I liked that side of him more. Maybe I should loosen up like that. I knew I had been on edge too much lately. I haven’t gave him a chance to be himself much. The only time was when we had our conversation when he said his life story.

Except now, he seemed more of a party animal. That was something I didn’t really expect from him. Then again, he was a rock artist. He probably went out a lot more after shows when he was on tour. That was probably where he really let go. I could already tell he liked his booze and he liked his girls.

I thought of other girls swarming around him and being all over him. For some reason, it made me sick to my stomach. Then, the idea of me getting jealous of the girls being all over him made me sicker. Why am I getting jealous all of a sudden? Snap out of it, snap out of it.

I think what did snap me out of it was when I looked up. The noise got louder all of a sudden. Jackson was right in front of me. A few of the more hardcore fans followed closely behind him. One girl even had a video camera and got to the side so she could film us. Seriously? I’m in the way back and he still came to see me?

Then he sang the chorus, “Such a lovely, little girl. So glad she’s mine. Such lovely, brown eyes.”

I could feel my eyes light up in rage from being pointed out during this whole thing. Did anyone even know we were together? I felt my face become hostile and crossed my arms as I turned away from him. A few girls looked appalled at my behavior. Little did they know, I got enough of this at home. He turned along with me and took my hand and kissed it. All the girls melted. I wanted to die. My face flushed red. As he strutted back to the stage, he winked at me.

“You suck!” I snarled once Jackson and I were in the safety of our hotel room. I slammed the door behind us. “Why’d you do that?”

He merely rolled his eyes. “It was just for the performance. I felt like picking you out in particular only to spite you. Just so happened it fell to the chorus line.”

“I didn’t want that attention, and you knew it!” I hissed, grabbing my pajamas and heading into the bathroom to change. I shut the door before he tried to come in and say something else. I locked it.

As he spoke I untied my shirt and began to slip on the tank top I had packed. “What? Did you want me to kiss some other girl’s hand?” he snapped. I heard his body lean against the door.

The idea made me sick again. God, Marissa, stop feeling this way. “I wouldn’t of cared,” I lied. “It’s not like we’re really involved.”

He was silent for a moment. I took the sudden opportunity to change my pants into the shorts. “We kind of are. We’re getting married soon.”

I thought it over in my mind. The wedding date wasn’t that far away. That made my stomach flip and flop again. I was done getting changed, so I walked out of the bathroom.

“I guess you’re right on some sort of level,” I reluctantly said.

He smiled half-heartedly and pecked my forehead. I frowned and dropped my head on his shoulder. “I don’t want to get married,” I whined out.

“I won’t take that to any offence,” he snickered back. After a second he patted my back. “Don’t worry. It will be fine.”

“How do you know?” I asked, pulling back. I started to walk over to the bed and lay in it. I pulled the covers up and over my shoulder. Jackson followed me after he had changed, too. Not that he really did, he only slept in boxers.

He adjusted the blankets as he laid down in bed. “Because it just will. Trust me. I know.”

I peeked over at him and his eyes were closed. There was a subtle rise and fall of his chest. I watched it for a moment. I didn’t have anything else to say. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep.

“I can’t sleep,” I said after some time had passed. Which was partially true. I wasn’t tired at all and I knew I wouldn’t fall asleep. Plus, I knew I would be bored. Might as well keep him awake, too.

He opened one eye. “Did you even try to sleep?”

“Yes,” I said. I had a feeling he knew I was lying.

“Just try. I’m exhausted.”

“Think of all those nights you kept me up. Nu-uh, I’m not letting you off this easy, mister.”

He looked at me with a raised eyebrow. He seemed amused by my antics in some way. “What are you going to do?” he egged on. Actually, I haven’t even thought that far ahead. There wasn’t any way I could really keep him up.

Sitting up, I thought for a moment. “Uh....”

He chuckled smugly. “Night.” Then he turned back over.

“Wait,” I said, throwing myself over him and pushed him back over. My upper body was hovering over him while my legs were on my half of the bed. My hands pressed down on his shoulders so he’d face me.
“Hm, this is a change,” he noted.

I rolled my eyes. “I’m not going to molest you, like you usually do to me.”

“I do not molest you!” he rebuked. He seemed somewhat insulted from my comment.

“Yeah. Uh-huh,” I muttered sarcastically.

He pursed his lips. “You need to loosen up, Marissa.”

I knew I had to. He was right. For once. I shrugged. I didn’t say anything back, but fell off of him.

After some moments had passed, it was his turn. He scooted closer to me and his hand started to move down my stomach gently. I looked over to see his face close to mine. I felt more comfortable this time. Surprisingly, I started to nod off. I guess I was more tired than I thought I was. That was until Jackson pressed his lips to my cheek. He always had to ruin it.

Tiredly, I started to obey. I was nearly about to pass out. I lifted my head up as his lips went lower down my neck. I moved my hand onto his, which was still on my stomach. I held onto his fingers.

He pulled away. He took my hand from mine and put the back of my hand to his forehead. “Now you must really have a concussion.”

“Huh?” I mumbled. I was still drifting in and out of consciousness.

“I’ll tell you in the morning. Get some rest.” I felt the covers fall back over me.

Right before I started to drift off, I felt Jackson nuzzle in close to me. His head rested on my shoulder and his arm slipped under mine.

The next morning I found myself in Jackson’s arms. His head was placed on my shoulder and he was still asleep. I smirked down at him and laid my head in his hair. I felt his steady breathing lightly press against my body. I felt at ease for a moment. Then there was a banging at the door.

Jackson’s eyes popped open and he pressed himself up. Except his hands were on my stomach and he pushed down on them. “Ow,” I cried.

He looked at me, then down at his hand. “Sorry,” he murmured sleepily. His hair was a wild and crazy mess. It fell into his eyes that could barely stay open, but he managed to saunter to the door and pull it open. Graupner was at the door.

“Hey, sleepyhead,” he sang, letting himself into the room. He plopped himself at the end of the bed and shook it. “Get up. We’re leaving.”

“Already?” I asked, sitting up and stretching. My bones cracked as I moved.

“Yep. Let’s go, lazies,” Ben rushed. He grabbed my hand and pulled me up and out of bed. I grunted and he dropped me onto the floor.

“Thanks.”

Jackson came to my aid and picked me up. My legs were asleep and numb from the waist down. I picked up my big over the shoulder bag and followed Ben out. Jackson picked up his bag as well.

Once we were back in the car, I laid in the trunk again. Jackson had found a blanket and I used my bag as a pillow. I was exhausted. I fell asleep almost immediately. Jackson did, too. He was right beside me.

* * *

I eventually decided it was time to contact Riley again. I wanted to see if she’d really follow through with her visit she promised. I doubted that she would. I wasn’t expecting a miracle, because that’d be what it would take to get her over here.

“Yeah, tonight’s not a good night,” she said into the phone on the other line. I sighed. All I wanted was a good friend right now. And I didn’t have one, so Riley was the next best thing.

I waited a moment when I heard some muffled noises in the background. Then I heard her say something to someone else. “Stop, I’m on the phone.... Yeah, tonight’s not the best time,” she repeated.

“I got that the first time,” I spat, annoyed. I debated on whether or not I should hang up the phone right then.

But then she started to say something. “How’s the fiancé going?”

“Oh, it’s going.”

I knew she was smiling wickedly back in the phone when she roguishly asked, “Did you bang him yet?”

“Hell no!” I replied, louder than I had wanted to. I pressed the phone to my chest to see if Jackson was anywhere near. I put it back up to my face. “It’s a weird situation.”

“Does he bring other girls home or something?” She tried to guess.

“Is your mind always in the gutter?”

“Yes,” she cackled. “Does he though?” she asked again.

“No.”

For once in her life, she said something slightly inspirational and sincere. “I can tell you’re tense. Maybe you should loosen up. I bet it’d work out better if you guys communicated more. Just give him a chance.”

“So I’ve heard.” I guess I really did need to loosen up. I didn’t understand how she got that much out of what I said for only a few minutes. “How’d you--”

“I’ve known you for, like, forever. I can tell when you’re stressed and only screwing things up worse.” Same old Riley. Always insulting after saying something nice.

I smiled. “Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it, kid.” With that, she hung up the phone. I knew she wanted to be back with her boy toy. He’d only be there for a week, tops.

But what she said definitely stuck with me. I think that was why I kept her around; she has her moments of being a reasonable and functioning human being.

I didn’t exactly know how to ‘loosen up’ around Jackson. He made me nervous in some ways. Other ways he made me want to just scream. Loosening up would mean that I would have to let my walls down. I wasn’t really prepared for that yet. But I did have a good idea in mind.

I walked out of my room and ran down the steps. I slid into the kitchen with my socks. I had a feeling Jackson would be there. And I was right. I found him sitting at the counter. He had on his glasses today instead of wearing contacts. His face was buried in a book. I slid over so I didn’t make any noises.

“Boo.” I pulled the book down. He merely jolted. It put a smirk on my face though. “Do you want to go out tonight?”

Jackson looked at me with confusion. “I really think you’re getting sick.”

“What?”

He folded the page back in his book and set it down. “You were all cuddly last night. Kind of like a little kitten. It was cute,” he mocked airily.

I rattled my brain for excuses. “I was just really tired. I get that way sometimes.”

“Uh-huh,” Jackson said, unamused with my reply. He knew I was just making excuses.

I went back to my initial question, “So do you want to or not?”

“Sure. If you’ll play nice this time.” I assumed he was referring back to last time. When he had to take me to Ben’s.

I looked up at the ceiling. Oh, how I wanted to fight his answer. “I will,” I scoffed.