You're Still the One

We lay on our living room couch panting. Billie's jeans were still around his ankles as I was pulling up mine. I watched as he slowly pulled his underwear up and began to button his jeans. We had teased each other so much on the way home, that the living room was as far as we got before we attacked each other. Billie reached for his jacket and pulled a cigarette from his pocket. He placed it between his lips and lit it. I shot up and pulled it out of his mouth, stubbing it out on the ashtray next to me. He looked at me in disbelief.

“What the fuck?” He spat. I glared at him.

“Smoking is gonna have to stop.” I informed him. He sighed and leaned back against the couch.

“Billie, we're having a baby and you and I both know smoking isn't good for it.” I lectured. I knew Billie liked smoking. Hell, I enjoyed a few blunts here and there, but we've got to start thinking about this baby instead of ourselves. Billie sighed loudly and laid his head on my thigh.

“But...what am I suppose to do after we fuck?” He whined. I rolled my eyes and ran my hand through his hair.

“Lay with me.” I stated. Billie scoffed.

“I did that already.” He mumbled. I giggled and kissed his head.

“Just think, it's for the baby.” I cooed. Billie smiled a little and nodded his head.

“Okay, I'll quit.” He promised. I smiled and kissed his jaw.

“It'll be worth it.” I whispered. Billie patted my leg and sat up. I placed my legs across his lap.

“Tre's already requested to be the Godfather.” He informed me. I snorted and rolled my eyes.

“In his dreams.” I replied while looking up. I expected Billie to laugh with me, but instead he had a look of hurt across his face. I frowned. “Wait, were you serious?” I asked. Billie rolled his eyes and pushed my legs off him while standing up.

“Nope.” He answered me shortly while walking towards our bedroom. I quickly followed behind him. He was pulling his shirt over his head when I walked in. He looked in my direction and then shook his head. I narrowed my eyes.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” I questioned. Billie glared at me and walked towards me.

“What's wrong with me? I feel like I have no say in a fucking thing when it comes to this baby.” He yelled. My eyes widened.

“What the fuck is that suppose to mean?” I bellowed. Billie snorted.

“What's it supposed to mean? How many fucking times have I told you we need to tell our families that you're pregnant? Huh? How many?” He spat. I looked away from his glaring eyes and down at the floor.

“That has nothing to do with this.” I growled. Billie clenched his jaw.

“It has everything to do with this, Julia! My band knows that I'm going to be a father, but my own mother doesn't? That's fucked up.” He hissed. I licked my lips and crossed my arms over my chest.

“I just don't know how to tell them.” I confessed, still not looking in his eyes. Billie let out a low growl.

“You pick up the damn phone and tell them you couldn't keep your legs crossed and that I knocked you up.” He spat with fire dancing in his eyes. The anger boiling inside me vanished and was replaced with a feeling of hurt. I felt a lump in my throat rise and tears prick my eyes.

“You fucking asshole.” I choked out as I pushed his chest in anger and stormed towards our bathroom. Billie caught my hand and pulled me back.

“Babe, wait I didn’t...” He started. I jerked my hand out of his grasp and glared at him.

“Get the fuck away from me.” I hissed while slamming the bathroom door shut. Tears were already streaking my face as I slid down the wall and started to sob. Billie banged on the bathroom door.

“Julie. Please open the door.” He begged. I laid down on a pile of his clothes and shook my head.

“Just go away, Billie Joe.” I whimpered. Billie sighed and then the banging stopped. I lay in the bathroom floor and sobbed for a good twenty minutes before Billie lightly knocked on the door again.

“Baby?” He questioned. I sniffled loudly.

“What?” I replied. Billie let out a long sigh.

“I was way out of line.” He confessed. I sniffled again.

“I didn't mean what I said. I'm a fucking idiot.” He whispered. I bit my lip while sitting up and leaned against the door. “You mean the world to me, Jules. I wouldn't want to have a baby with anybody else but you.” He stated. I smiled a little and wiped my nose with my sleeve.

“You mean it?” I whispered. There was a short pause.

“Every word.” He replied. I stood up and carefully opened the door. I peeked out and Billie stood in front of me. I opened the door completely while Billie held out his arms, signaling for me to come closer. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my lips against his. We broke apart and Billie pressed his forehead against mine.

“I'm sorry.” I whispered. Billie raised his eyebrows. “It's not fair for me to make you keep something like this from your mother.” I confessed. Billie started to speak, but I stopped him. “We can tell them tomorrow. Mom's been bugging me all week to come over for dinner.” I stated. Billie's eyes lit up.

“Really? You're sure?” He questioned. I nodded.

“It's time.” I whispered. Billie planted soft kisses all over my cheek.

"Thank you." He sighed. I smiled and kissed him again.

“Where are the ultrasound pictures?” He asked. I looked around the room until my eyes landed on my purse. I stood up and walked towards the dresser. I dug through the cluttered mess in my bag until I found the black and white photograph. I strode toward the bed and climbed in next to Billie, who was leaning against the headboard. He took the picture from my hand and stared at it intently.

“That's our son or daughter.” He whispered. I laid my head on his shoulder and nodded.

“Do you ever think about names?” I asked. Ever since finding out I was pregnant, names were always on my mind. Billie nodded. Do you want a boy or a girl?” I whispered. Billie was silent for a while, still staring at the picture.

“I'd be happy with either, but I've kind always wanted a girl.” He told me. I furrowed my eyebrows.

“Don't guys usually want a boy?” I questioned. Billie chuckled a little.

“I guess, but if we had a girl, maybe she wouldn't be like her old man.” He said. I kissed his cheek.

“If that's the case then she'll be wrapped around your finger in no time.” I stated. Billie laughed. “Will you sing to our baby?” I asked. Billie turned from looking at the picture and faced me.

“Of course I will.” He stated as he ran his hand over my stomach for what would be the third time today. “I sing to Mommy, don't I?” He whispered. I smiled and leaned close to his ear.

“You're going to be a great father, Billie. Don't ever doubt that.” I whispered while kissing his cheek again and laying down next to him. We stared at the picture a talked for another hour before finally turning out the light. Our explosive fight had actually made us closer to each other. We didn't turn away from each other all night.