Shadows Kiss

A couple months had gone by and we were still on the road. The boys were finally finishing up their American tour and next we would be headed to Europe. The journey had been a long, extremely exhausting, and sometimes emotional. We had, had a lot of amazing times together, but also some bad ones. No matter how much you love someone, when there are seven people all cooped up on a tour bus together for a long amount of time, you eventually start bumping heads. The boys were becoming annoyed with one another at times over silly things and I had noticed it seemed the honeymoon was over for Bri and Anna. The constant arguing and bickering had begun, and that worried me for their future.

Matt and I laid in the King sized bed found in the back of the bus. He was still snoring while I watched an old favorite, Gentlemen Prefer Blondes. As far as I knew everyone else was still sound asleep. I on the other hand, had been having trouble sleeping. I was growing restless being trapped on the bus all the time. I needed sunlight and fresh air. I needed nature and an escape. Most of all I needed my magick.

I felt the bus come to a stop and the engine shut off. Then I heard the sound of footsteps running for the room, I smiled to myself knowing who it was and what they were about to do. Jimmy busted through the door, "Good morning Dallas!" I laughed out loud at my crazy friend. He jumped on the bed in between Matt and I and began to kick and scream wildly, "Adventure time, adventure time, adventure time!"

Matt rolled over with a loud groan. "Jimmy shut the fuck up dude!" He pulled the covers over his head.

"C'mon Shadz! Enough sleepy dream time, lets go do some exploring!" Jimmy nudged him.

"Dude!" Matt rolled back over, pulling the covers down, giving him a serious look, "I don't want to fucking explore okay? Some people need rest! I happen to be one of them!"

Jimmy put his face right up to Matt's with a sad frown, then stuck his tongue out. Matt whirled back around and covered his head again with a loud sigh of annoyance. "Party pooper." Jimmy rolled his eyes.

I slid out of bed and put me feet on the floor, "Come on Jim, lets go." I motioned him to follow me out of the room, which he happily obeyed.

This had become routine for he and I. Every new place we went, it didn't matter if we arrived day or night, we would go out on the town and explore the sights. Most of the time nobody else came along. They all seemed to share Matt's point of view. But we didn't care, we had an amazing time with or without them. Jimmy and I had became very close over time, he was like my big goofy brother. And after many failed attempts he finally realized there was nothing he could do to embarrass me.

We crept past the snoring bunks and into the kitchen area. "Lemme make a cup, then we'll go." I said. I had been up for several hours so I was already ready to go. I just needed a little coffee to get me moving.

"Already on it." Jim smiled, pointing to the full coffee pot.

"You rock Sir." I smiled back to him, taking the pot and filling my cup.

About an hour later we had walked all over the busy city and decided it was time for food. We picked a place called "Big Red's Big Burgers". Jim picked a booth near a back corner. I glanced around the room at all the cowboys and cowgirls who stared at us oddly. I don't know if it was the way we were dressed, the fact that we had tattoos, or simply because Jimmy was running wildly like an out of control child through the restaurant yelling, "Mine, mine, mine!" after the booth he was headed for.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry." I whispered with a smile, as I walked by the tables of people.

"Bless his heart." I heard an older lady say, clearly thinking Jim had a mental disorder. I rolled my eyes at his behavior and slid into the seat across from him.

"You're an idiot." I giggled.

"Yeah so? You like it!" He gave me a serious look.

"Yeah so? You gotta problem with it?" I shot him one back.

"Well maybe I do, ya yella-bellied, bronco ridin, rootin tootin, ummm.....mean girl!" He jumped up in his seat pretending to aim guns at me, just like the cowboys in the movies.

"May I take your order?" A woman asked in a annoyed tone.

Jimmy jumped back down in his seat quickly, flipping his menu open and read off his order. He then pushed his menu to the end of the table towards the waitress and smiled like nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

She jotted it down then turned to me with a cocked eyebrow that reminded me of Aunt Jasmine. I smiled up at the lady, "I'll just have a honky tonk burger combo, with sweet tea, thanks." I waited for her to write it down and reach her my menu.

She ripped it out of my hand, giving me a cold stare, "Coming right up!" She turned and walked away.

"I don't thank they like our kind too much round here Jim." I whispered with a giggle.

"That's a damn shame! Their loss though. Everybody knows we are the best kind!" Jimmy laughed out loud. "So on a more serious note, how are things?"

"Umm, good I guess." I flipped my long blond hair over my shoulder, easing back into my seat.

"So that translates to not so good and you are ready to go home?" His blue eyes looked deep into my own.

"No, I don't want to leave you guys. But I do miss home. I miss the Aunts and my house, maybe I just miss Carolina." I shrugged.

"I understand, but the tour is almost done. So not too much longer then we will finally be off that bus."

"Yeah, I think I can hang in there. It's Anna I'm worried about really." I admitted with a sigh.

"Yeah her and Syn have been having it out pretty bad lately." He looked down at the table sadly.

"I've noticed. I hate to see them going through relationship troubles already, ya know?"

"Yeah, me too. I thought they were perfect for each other. But you gotta give it to her, he is a dick most of the time."

"I mean he gets moody, but we all do. It's a tight situation we are in. They didn't get to date like normal couples do, so it makes it difficult at times."

"I heard her threatening to leave the other night." Jimmy informed me. "I went to the bus to get my sticks and I didn't realize anyone was in there so you know me, I barged right in. Turns out Syn and Anna were in there and they were arguing pretty heavy. Not sure what it was about but I just heard the tail end of Anna saying if things didn't change she was out of here."

"I didn't know that." I stared at him with wide eyes.

"Yeah." He was quiet for a moment, as we both looked down at the table. "I told Shadz about it, and we are both worried." I stared back up at him with a puzzled look. "We are concerned that if Anna leaves you will leave with her."

"No Jim, I'm not going anywhere." I placed my hand on his, giving it a squeeze. "I mean it will break my heart to see her go, if she decides to. But I love Matt, I can't leave him. Hell, I love all of you, I couldn't imagine leaving any of you now."

"Good." He squeezed my hand back, and I could see the storm clouds moving out of his eyes.

.................................................................................................................................................

Several hours later Anna and I sat alone in the empty arena as the boys did their sound check. I was slumped back into my chair with my feet on the seat in front of me. Anna sat up straight with her legs folded to the side underneath her. She had been quiet most of the day.

"Everything okay?" I slid my aviators on top of my head, looking over to my best friend.

"Ah, taking it day by day." She shrugged.

"Anna, talk to me, what's going on with you and Bri?"

She took a deep breath in, letting out a long sigh. She propped her arm on the armrest and placed her cheek in her palm, looking over at me. "Honestly Alice....we are falling apart." She paused a moment fighting back tears. "The end is coming Alice, I can feel it. And there's nothing I can do to stop it. It's fucking killing me dude." The tears began to stream down her face.

"Oh honey, come here." I reach over, wrapping her in a tight hug. "Anna it's okay darling. You guys have just hit a rough patch that's all. Every couple goes through it. You guys will be fine. You're strong you'll get through it babe." I tried to ease her pain.

"No, no we're not. I've tried to fix it, I've tried to listen, I've tried to talk about it, I've tried to be supportive, I've done all I know to do. Nothing is working and I don't understand why. I don't know how we got here. Everything was perfect. So where did I go wrong Alice?"

"You didn't babe. Things are just tense with traveling all the time, the shows, the madness, it's just a lot going on at once."

"Maybe I should just go home for now." She looked at me very seriously.

"I'm not gonna sit here and beg you to stay just to be selfish. As much as it will suck without you, you need to do what's right for you. Honestly Anna, if you think leaving is the best thing for you to do then you should. But I think it's something you should really think through before making a decision."

"I don't want to leave. But I feel like he doesn't want me here anymore, like he's just waiting for me to go."

"I don't think he feels that way at all Anna. I think Syn is just really stressed and he doesn't wanna hurt you by fighting and saying angry words when he's upset, so he's just keeping his distance. Give him some time."

"Okay, I will wait it out a little longer. I'll give him some space, see if that helps. Besides you and I could start going out more." She wiped away the remaining tears, a bright smile broke across her face then.

"Yes! You need to start going out with me and Jim for adventure time!" I encouraged her.

"Sounds great."

.................................................................................................................................................

So another show was now over and the boys met us backstage. They were all hot and sweaty and clearly exhausted. "Great job guys." Anna complimented them.

"Thanks babe." Syn flopped on the couch beside her. I watched nervously, waiting for the next move.

"You were amazing honey." She smiled over to him, sill waiting for a kiss.

"Thanks." He simply said, standing from the couch. "Hey you guys go ahead, I'm gonna shower then help the guys pack up."

"What are you talking about Gates?" Johnny asked.

"They've been packing my shit wrong, fucking things up, losing shit, breaking important guitar gear. I'm gonna go show them the correct way to pack up my things tonight. I already told them not to touch any of my stuff til I get back out there." He explained, nearly growling.

My eyes grew wide as I watched a fierce flicker of color in his eyes. Those gorgeous, warm, brown eyes for a moment looked solid raven black. He shot me and evil stare. "Bri, are you okay?" I couldn't hold it back any longer. I was growing sick of his attitude.

He turned on his heel, whipping around to face me. "Yes, yes Alice I am perfectly fine. Thanks for asking." He said sarcastically, which pissed me off immediately.

"Hey Brian, you watch your tone!" Matt's voice boomed through the room.

"Hey Shadows, go fuck yourself okay?" He pointed a finger at his best friend.

"Dude what the fuck is your problem?" Jimmy stepped up to the dark haired guitarist. "You've been shitty for weeks now. And let me tell ya, everyone is getting a little sick of it man."

"You know what Rev? Personally I don't give a shit if everyone is sick of it, because I'm sick of all of you!" He yelled, then turned around and flew out of the room, nearly ripping the door off its hinges.

"Damn, looks like it's Brian's time of the month." Johnny looked shocked, but had a chuckle anyway.

"Fuck him, let's head for the bus guys. I'm so excited to finally see a hotel for once." Zacky grabbed his gear and headed for the door.

"But what about Brian?" Anna asked, with a concerned look on her face.

"Don't worry he'll catch up." Matt patted her shoulder reassuringly.

"Oh, okay." She said hesitantly.

"Come one babe. I'll keep you company until he gets to the hotel." I grabbed her hand, offering a smile.

.................................................................................................................................................

Later that night I sat in Anna's room talking things over with her about the scene that had occurred after the show. Surprisingly she wasn't even upset. She said she wanted to give him space, so not to push him away by hovering. I understood that she was worried about him, and honestly I was beginning to worry myself. I had never seen Brian like this. I was trying to be a good friend by considering the stressful position he was in. Maybe he did need a break, from all of us.

"I'm gonna go check on Matt." I stood from the bed. "I'm gonna let him know Bri hasn't made it back yet so I'm gonna stay a little longer."

"Alice?" I heard her whisper, just as I reach the door.

"Yeah?" I turned to face my beautiful friend.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" Her eyes looked heavy with heartache. "I don't think he will come."

I paused for a moment, glancing at the clock, which now read 3:15 am. I frowned, becoming angry with Brian again for hurting my Anna. Then I looked back to her with a weak smile. "I sure will. Let me go tell him goodnight and change into some jammies okay?" She nodded with a small smile that seemed to break my heart even more. "I'll be right back."

I went down to my room where I found Matt laying on the bed in his boxers, silently flipping through channels on the TV. He sat up straight, looking over to me with a sexy smirk. "Hey gorgeous." He nearly purred.

"Aren't you a sight." I stood back admiring every inch of his body. He motioned me over and I came to stand at the edge of the bed in between his legs. He wrapped his arms around me, sliding one hand down over my ass squeezing it tight, then the other up my back to undo my bra. He softly kissed along my collar bone, making me insane for him. "Babe," I moaned, not wanting the moment to end, but knowing it had to, "I can't."

"Why can't you?" He stood, pressing himself against me so I could feel him perfectly.

My eyes went wild, biting down on my bottom lip. "I promised." I shook my head, resting my hands on his chest, feeling his smooth skin.

"Just for a minute." He whispered into my ear, moving down to kiss my neck seductively. He backed me into the wall, again grinding himself against me, teasing me even more. My eyes rolled to the back of my head, getting lost in the pleasure.

"Matt..." I began, but he covered my mouth with a deep, wet kiss, "there is..." again he smothered me with intoxicating kisses, "no minute..." another passionate kiss, "with you." I finally managed.

"I can't help myself." He looked deep into my eyes, his face still so close to mine.

Finally I recaptured my strength, suddenly remembering the heartbreaking look on Anna's face as I left her alone in an empty room. I pushed Matt back a little with a deep sigh. "I'm sorry baby, but I can't. I promised Anna I would stay with her tonight. I was just coming to let you know and tell you goodnight."

"What?" His tone changed and he looked angry. "Gates never showed?"

"No, I'm afraid not." I shook my head with disappointment. "Anna's a wreck right now, I don't wanna leave her alone."

"That son of a bitch." Matt whirled around grabbing his phone. He began to dial and put it to his ear, waiting for a response. I walked over to the closet looking through my things for a certain bag of pajamas. "No answer." He turned to me.

"I didn't expect him to." I admitted. "He was pretty upset with all of us earlier. I think he just needs a night to himself maybe, to process everything." I shrugged.

"He doesn't realize how he is hurting her though. It's not fair to Anna. He's being a dick and he knows it. If he doesn't stop with all the bullshit, he's gonna lose her."

"I know." I sighed again, getting to my feet. "I'm gonna go down to the bus, I think I left my bag there."

"I'll come with you." He followed me to the door.

"It's okay baby, I'll be right back." I touched his arm.

"Okay, I'm gonna keep trying Gates." He walked back to the bed, as I exited the room.

Once outside I noticed the light on the bus was on and the door was wide open. It was then I heard "What the fuck Brian?"

"Oh shit." I muttered to myself as I ran closer to the bus. I ran up the steps and came crashing into a horrific scene. There was Anna, with wide eyes in shock, that were now filling with tears as she looked down upon him. Then there was Brian sprawled out across a couch half naked, with a girl on each side. One wore a thong and hooker heels, while the other had nothing on but a tattoo and a smile. "You have got to be kidding me!" I screamed in anger.

I looked to Brian in shock, but he never said a word. He simply sat there and smiled drunkenly up at us, unaware he was about to lose the only woman who ever really gave a damn about him.

"I can't fucking believe you Brian! How could you do this to me?" Anna yelled at him. "Who the fuck are they?"

"Women who know how to please a man like Syn." The tall blonde with heels on gave Anna an evil look.

"Shut the fuck up blondie before I beat you so badly you'll have to be shipped off to the Barbie factory to repair your parts!" Anna hissed.

"He doesn't want you anymore Raggedy Anne! A man like Gates here needs a real woman. So take that white trash back to the trailer park honey." Said the dark haired girl to his right. It was then I noticed blood was slowly dripping in long streams down her skinny neck. This alarmed me, but then rage was the only thing that took over.

"That's enough!" I couldn't contain myself any longer. I moved quickly, grabbing the whore by her hair and drug her through the bus and down the stairs, throwing her onto the hard ground of the parking lot. "You're gonna pay bitch!" I screamed down at her, watching her shriek in terror. I began to hit her fiercely over and over in her pretty little face.

Upstairs each of the boys ran out of their doors at the exact same time. They all stopped to look at each other. "You guys see what Syn is seeing right now?" Johnny panicked.

They all nodded in agreement with wide eyes. "Let's not just stand here, we gotta go." Matt ran past all of them for the stairs.

By the time they made it out into the cool night air, they could see the horrific scene taking place. Matt and Zacky began to pry me off of Brian's whore. But I still fought with all my might.

The girl before me, lay bruised and bloody. I took a deep breath when I felt almost satisfied with my work, finally giving into the guys effort to pull me away. I stood to get a better look at her, as she shook with fear and screamed in agony, tears rolling down her bruised cheeks. "Don't you ever fucking talk to my friend that way!" I screamed, but she never responded. I kicked her hard in the ribs, "I said do you fucking hear me?"

"Yes! Yes, I hear you! Please stop!" She cried out.

"Good." I smiled to myself, kneeling back down over her. "Look who's the Raggedy Anne now bitch!"

Johnny and Jimmy had already ran inside to break up the fight between Anna and the blonde bimbo. "Somebody get this crazy bitch off me!" The girl shrieked, trying to escape Anna's wrath. The boys tugged to Anna, who barely budged.

"Help!" Johnny yelled to us outside.

I came to my senses, remembering Anna. I ran back to the bus and Matt and Zacky followed close behind. "Anna, come on." I pulled to her arm.

"No! This whore needs to be taught a lesson Alice! And I'm giving it to her!" She continued to hit the girl violently.

"Anna stop! You got her! You got her, okay?" With another hard tug, I ripped her away from the girl.

"Fuckin bitch! Next time you'll know to keep your mouth shut!" Anna screamed over her shoulder as I pulled her off the bus. I could still feel the rage inside of her, as her body shook out of control.

"Anna, Anna." I screamed into her face, trying to bring her back to me. Finally her eyes darted towards mine. She was doing her best to focus on me. "It's okay, you got her." I hugged her tightly. She was still trembling in my arms, as she began to sob into my shoulder.

"I hate him! I fuckin hate him!" Her voice rang into my ears.

I slowly smoothed my hands over her hair, "I know honey." I whispered to her. "I am so sorry babe."

I could hear the boys inside taking turns to freak on Brian. Suddenly I seen Matt shove him backwards towards the door. "Fuck man, I'm going!" Bri yelled.

They all filed out of the bus surrounding Brian again. "What the fuck is wrong with you Gates? This girl fuckin loves you dude? Don't you get that?" Matt screamed at him.

"I got a little drunk okay Matt? My God, I'm sorry!" Brian raised his arms over his head, still holding onto a beer tightly.

"You're disgusting dude." Johnny shook his head in shame.

"Go to hell Johnny!" Brian spat.

Anna pulled away from me, walking over to Brian. She got right up in his face looking him dead in the eye.

"What? You wanna kiss?" Brian stumbled, but regained his balance.

She huffed as if the words knocked the wind out of her, then rolled her eyes in disbelief. Suddenly there was a sound familiar to thunder, as she smacked him across the face with all her might. "Johnny's right, you are fucking disgusting, and miserable, but most of all pathetic! So many people adore you, look up to you, respect you. All your fans think you are the most amazing man, who can play killer guitar, but also has the mind of a genius. It's just so sad, if only they knew what a monster you really are inside." She screamed into his face. He quickly lost the smirk and stood staring at her as if he was about to cry. "I made the biggest mistake by coming out here with you. You can do whatever the fuck it is you want now Gates, I'm going home." She turned to walk away from the man she loved.

He grabbed her arm, turning her around. "Anna wait,"

"No Brain! I'm done with you! I never, ever want to see your hideous face again! Forget my fucking name, okay?" She nearly spat the words at him. "I'm gonna tell you this one time and one time only, let me fucking go, now!" She emphasized the last word. He hung his head, releasing his grip and let her arm fall back to her side. She turned and stormed off back to the hotel.

Brian looked up at me, shame covering his once beautiful face. I shook my head at him, giving him a death stare. "You fuckin blew it Gates, and you have nobody to blame but yourself. I hope you can live with that forever." I hissed at him, then turned to follow my best friend.

"Forever." I heard him whisper behind me.