The New Face of Failure

Life is full of interruptions and complications ~ Love Actually

He watched her being rushed away by her new boyfriend. Wait, is he her new boyfriend? He thought. She didn’t really act like he was and he wasn’t introduced as such. Patrick just assumed he was because he was with Harper and he had seemed close to her.

“Hey Patrick, Earth to Patrick!” he could hear Joe’s voice ringing in his ear.

He turned his attention back to his band mates who were all staring at him with concern. “Hey buddy, how ya doing?” Andy asked him empathetically.

“I’m, uh, kind of confused right now, I think.” He looked at Joe. “Did Cassidy ever mention that Harper had a new boyfriend to you?”

Joe shook his head. “She said there was some loser who was trying to get into Harper’s pants, but they weren’t dating.”

“Ah, that must be him then,” Pete replied.

“Hey guys, can we walk and talk? Charlie will be pissed if you’re late for this interview,” Marcus cut in.

“Yeah, sure, lead the way, big guy,” Pete replied. “Okay, so we’re going to that party right?”

“Uh, yeah we are. That dude looked super pissed that she had even invited us. I think it wouldn’t be nice to let him feel satisfied if we don’t show up,” Joe said.

Patrick shook his head. “I don’t know guys. I don’t think we should.”

“Wait, excuse me?” Pete said, grabbing Patrick’s jacket. “What the fuck did you just say? You have been silently mourning the loss of Harper for months now and you now have a perfect opportunity to get back with her and you aren’t going to take it?” He slapped Patrick in the back of the neck, making him wince.
“Dude, get your head right.”

“I thought you all wanted me to get over Harper!” Patrick said exasperatedly.

“That was until we realized that she still loves you,” Andy replied. Patrick didn’t know how they had learned that from their brief interaction with her. She looked absolutely terrified when it was just the two of them.

“Because she invited us to the party? I don’t think that means she still loves me. Maybe she was just being nice.”

“Dude, she said she wanted you there. We were an afterthought,” Pete pointed out. “Which, not gonna lie, makes me a little hurt, but she’s the love of your life, so I’ll get over it.”

“Sorry you’re not the center of everyone’s world, Pete,” Joe cracked. Pete rolled his eyes at him.

“Come on, Patrick, let’s go.”

“Okay, okay, I’ma have to butt in here. Who is that cute girl?” Marcus asked them as they headed down to the MTV studios.

“That is Harper, Marcus. She was dating Patrick until he made out with another girl and she broke it off with him,” Pete explained.

“Wow, okay, let’s just lay all my crap on the table,” Patrick muttered.

“Sorry, he asked,” Pete shrugged. “And they haven’t been together in like four months.”

“She broke up with you? From the way she acted, I would have thought you had did the dirty deed,” Marcus commented.

“Why do you say that?” Patrick asked him.

“Well, she looked all squirmy and uneasy like. And her eyes never left you, not really. I can tell when a girl is jonesin’ and that girl wanted you bad, Patrick.”

Patrick looked at the guys who all had triumphant “I told you so” faces on. “You think she really wants to get back together?”

“Patrick, stop acting like some naïve stupid 19 year old,” Pete said.

“But I am a naïve stupid 19 year old,”

“With fame, fortune and a rockin’ bod!”

“I don’t know about the third one,” Joe laughed and Patrick shot him an annoyed look.

Patrick jumped when he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He pulled it out and nearly dropped it when he had seen the name appear on it. “Harper?” he whispered to himself.

“What did you say?” Pete piped up.

Patrick stared at the text message that had appeared. He didn’t have a text message from Harper in months.

I REALLY WANT U TO COME TONITE. PLEASE COME TO THE PARTY. I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING

“What is it Patrick?”

He showed them his phone. “It’s Harper, she, um, just texted me. She really wants me to come tonight, she said she wants to talk about something…”

“You know Patrick, I didn’t think I’d have to say I told you so, but…” Pete squeezed his shoulders. “This is great, man.”

Patrick smiled and stared at the text message. He quickly typed in his response and hit “Send”. “Okay, so, we’re going to this party now.”

“Yes, the look on that douche’s face is gonna be priceless!!” Joe exclaimed, pumping his fist into the air. Suddenly his phone started ringing. “Oops, girlfriend. Hey Cass, babe, what’s up?”

Patrick stared at his phone, a smile stuck on his face. He had waited months for a text from Harper, and to get that kind of text was amazing. He felt lighter than he had in the past few months, happier. He knew that all of the adoration that the guys were receiving for their album and their tour should have been able to fill that void, but it just wasn’t enough. He knew he needed Harper.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Harper and Nicholas spent the rest of the day mulling around New York, which was blooming with the warm front that came its way. Harper found herself day dreaming as they walked around Central Park, taking in the greening trees, street performers, and laughing children running around.

“Maybe when I graduate from college, I’ll move here,” she said out loud, twirling around on the sidewalk.

Nicholas laughed. “You’re finishing college?”

Harper stopped turning and looked at him. “Yeah, of course I am.”

“Honey, you don’t need to finish college. You’re going to have millions soon.”

“It’s just one book,” she replied.

“You don’t think they will ask you to write more? You wrote that book to be continued. Don’t lie, I know you did, I can tell by the ending.”

She knew that Mae didn’t want her to tell Nicholas anything. “I don’t know if they do, but it doesn’t matter. I promised my parents I’d finish college.”

“Then transfer to a school in New York.”

“It’s more expensive.”

“Oh Harper, come now, is money really going to be an issue much longer? I saw how much that dress cost that you bought,” Nicholas commented. He took her hands and kissed her knuckles. “IT would be amazing for you to go to school up here and move here. Maybe we could even move in together.”

Harper’s breath caught in her throat. “Uh…wh….what?” she stammered.

“Oh Harper, I know, that’s a lot to take in, but if we keep on it’ll be inevitable. You don’t want to do a long distance relationship do you?”

“Relationship?” She suddenly remembered what she had planned on telling him that night.

“Harper, you’re charming when you act naïve, but you’re not a little girl anymore. You’re an adult now.”

Nicholas was sounding like her father and every other adult she had come across and it started to make her feel annoyed. “I know what I am. But even if I’m an adult, it doesn’t mean I have to have everything figured out,” she shot back, pulling her hands away from him.

“Harper, you’re acting like a petulant child,” Nicholas said, raising his eyebrows at her. “Are you still upset over me not wanting your ex-boyfriend at the party?”

Harper turned away from him, not wanting her face to betray her. “No, I’m just… a lot of people tell me I’m this dumb, naïve, girl, and I can’t believe you would call me that too,” she said, pulling her phone out of her pocket and staring at the text message from Patrick that he had sent while she and Nicholas were at lunch.

I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE U. WHERE IS THE PARTY AT THOUGH? HATE TO SHOW UP TO SOME WEIRD SATANIC RITUAL OR SOMETHING ;)

“Oh, Harper, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you,” Nicholas said, coming up behind her and rubbing her shoulders. “I’m just out of my wits right now. I just want to be with you.”

Harper slipped her phone back into her pocket and turned around to face him. “It’s okay,” she said quickly, easing away from him. She started walking forward, hoping that he would just drop the whole thing.

She pulled her phone out and started texting Cassidy.

I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE PATRICK TONIGHT. U THINK HE’S EXCITED TO SEE ME?

FUCK HARPER, I THINK THE BOY IS COMING IN HIS PANTS RIGHT NOW HE’S SO EXCITED.

OH GOD YOU ARE SO GROSS YOU KNOW THAT?

She kept walking toward the street to get a cab, with Nicholas following closely behind, trying to get her attention. As she neared the curb, she looked up and as she did, accidentally banged into a fire hydrant, her phone tumbling out of her hands.

“Oh no!” she exclaimed. She made a move for it, but Nicholas grabbed her hand.

“Jesus Harper stop!” he shouted, just as a taxi whizzed past them at lightening speed. “That cab could’ve just killed you!”

Harper pushed him off her and reached down onto the street, quickly gathering her now smashed phone. “Oh no, no, no, no,” she cried over and over.

Nicholas stared down at her phone. “Harper you should really watch where you’re going.”

She stuff the broken phone into her pocket and balled up her fists. “Yeah, I’m starting to realize that.” She could feel tears welling up in her eyes when she realized that she didn’t have a way to contact Cassidy or Patrick now. “Crap,” she muttered.

“It’s okay, Harper. We’ll get you a new phone later. It’s not like there is anyone pressing you need to contact.”

Patrick, I need to make sure he makes it to the party, she thought, but she didn’t want to tell him that. She prayed that he would make it on his own. He’ll be there Harper, she thought to herself. Don’t worry.
All she could think about the rest of the day was her broken phone. It was a black stain on an otherwise perfect day. She worried that it was going to mess up all of her plans for the evening too.

She tried to forget about it as she slipped on her black sequined dress that she had picked out for the party. She thought it looked classy, yet provocative, which is exactly what she wanted to look like when Patrick showed up. She had even curled her long brunette locks so that she could have the cascading waterfall curls that she had seen in countless magazines.

She pulled together her essential items in her small clutch and, sighing, placed her broken phone on her nightstand. She had tried to turn it on, but it was now just a useless piece of polycarbonate. She headed downstairs into the lobby, where Nicholas was waiting.

“Wow, Harper, you look astonishing,” he breathed, as he took her hand and kissed the top of it. She glanced around the lobby, hoping she might catch a glimpse of the guys, but it was already eight at night and she knew that they were at their venue getting ready for their show to start. She followed Nicholas into yet another cab and they headed a venue in Chelsea called 404.

Right as they entered, Harper stopped to speak to the security outside of the venue, holding the guest list.

“Oh, um, I would like to add a few names to that list, please,” she said to the beefy man who looked like a Top Gun version of Thor.

“Sure, Miss Williams, what are they?” The man pulled a pen out of his jacket pocket.

“Hey you know what, Harper, why don’t you let me tell him? You need to get in there, we’re already late and you are the guest of honor,” Nicholas suggested.

Harper was surprised by Nicholas’ willingness to help her make sure Patrick and the rest of the guys got into the party. “Oh, wow, thanks Nick, I appreciate that a lot!” She nodded to both of them and hurried inside, anxious to get the party started.

Harper was stunned by the amount of people there to celebrate her and her book’s success. There were quite a few other authors from the publishing company, her editors and other employees of the company, as well as a few lesser known celebrities in the New York area, socialites and the works. Mae had found her and had the owner of the venue announce her arrival on stage. Everyone started clapping, making her blush. Nicholas caught up with her soon after and they began their rounds. Nicholas’ eyes seemed to be roving the space for potential future bosses, and kept steering Harper over to different older men in suits all evening. She kept glancing at the clock on the wall and watched the time drift by.

“Is this your party or his?” Someone had said behind her as she was watching Nicholas banter with one of the editors of Vogue.

Harper turned around and saw Diane standing there, looking sleek in a simple black suit and faux leather pumps. “Diane!” she embraced her teacher and mentor. “He’s just really excited about all of these people. He’s not a writer like me, you know, so I guess he’s trying to always find his next job.”

Diane raised an eyebrow. “A shame he has to use your success to do it though.” She placed her hand on Harper’s back and steered her away from Nicholas. “You received your contract from Mae correct?” she said in a low voice.

Harper nodded. “Yeah, it looks good to me. When I go home tomorrow, I will go ahead and let my parents look over it just in case.”

Diane smiled. “Good. I think it is a good opportunity for you. Don’t worry, I’ll make sure the university continues to work with you.”

“Thanks Diane, I appreciate it… I actually appreciate all of the work you’ve done for me,” she said honestly, her eyes glancing at the clock again.

“I’d believe that more if you didn’t seem so distracted,” Diane commented. Harper winced. “Why do you keep looking at the clock? These high brow intellectuals and socialites boring you?” She winked at her.

“Um, well, the thing is… Patrick is supposed to be coming,” she said, rubbing her fingers nervously.

Diane’s smile widened. “Your muse and biggest fan… I’m sure your beau is not pleased with that…”

“My beau? Oh Nicholas? He’s not really… I’m just not into…” she stopped speaking, her face reddening.

“Well, I’m glad he’s coming. You’re making a good choice, my dear.” Diane patted her back and excused herself.

Harper looked at the clock. It said 11PM. She sighed and looked toward the entrance.

“Hey, where did you go?” Nicholas said, coming up to her.

“Oh Diane found me and we were chatting,” Harper replied. “You know, I think I’m going to go out there and see if they have arrived…”

“Oh don’t do that! This is your party honey. I’ll go and wait on them okay?” Nicholas gave her a quick kiss on the cheek.

“Nick, that’s really nice of you,” Harper said in disbelief.

“Well, I know you two are just friends if nothing else, and I am not going to hurt your friendships. What kind of guy would I be to do that?”

Harper felt guilty again for a second time that day. “Thank you Nicholas, that’s really sweet of you.”
He headed off and left her alone at the party.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Patrick straightened out his tie and slipped on his black loafers. He never really owned a good pair of black dress shoes, until their manager suggested that they have some dress clothes for events. He actually liked them, but the other guys hated them and thought dress clothes was too conformist. Patrick felt like he was slipping into another persona; He could pretend he was Elvis Costello or Frank Sinatra. He loved the idea of dress clothes, and he was excited that he got to wear it to see Harper.
The last time he saw her still weighed on his mind. He kept thinking about her eyes full of tears, her face blotchy and red from crying. It made his heart ache because he still could feel the shame of making her feel that way. He never blamed her for leaving the way she did, he wondered what he would have done if it had been reversed. All he could do now was try to come back from it. He needed to.

“Okay, Patrick, we’re gonna need you to breathe, okay, buddy?” Andy said, as they walked out of the hotel and into the SUV waiting out front for them. Marcus guarded them as they all piled into the back seats.

“I am breathing just fine,” Patrick retorted.

“You are acting surprisingly calm when you are about to see your ex-girlfriend that you utterly humiliated in front of an entire party, cheated on, and forever crushed her heart,” Joe noted.

“Wow, Joe, that’s… just.. Wow,” Patrick said, staring at him incredulously.

“Hey, just putting it out there,” Joe said with a shrug.

“Don’t worry man. When she sees you, I know it’ll all be okay,” Pete replied.

“I just hope we aren’t too late,” Patrick said, craning his neck to try to see the road ahead of them.
He pulled his phone out and texted Harper.

ALMOST THERE. CAN’T WAIT TO SEE U. DON’T WORRY, I SHOWERED :P

He thought it would be good to joke with her a bit, something a little personal between the two of them to make her feel comfortable. He stared at this phone, waiting for her to respond. Minutes went by, and not a word from her. He scrunched up his nose. That’s weird, he thought. Since she had texted him earlier that day, she had responded within seconds of him replying to her. Maybe she’s just busy with her guests, he reasoned. Yeah, that was it.

They headed up to the Chelsea area, and their driver parked the SUV outside of the venue where Harper said the party was being held.

“Okay, so she said she’d put us on list right?” Pete said as they got out of the car. They could hear the noise of the guests and the music from inside. “Looks like it’s still kicking.”

They walked up to a large man with a Iceman haircut who had a clipboard in his hands.

“Um, hi, we’re here for Harper William’s party,” Patrick said timidly to him.

The man raised his eyebrow. “Wow, you guys are late,” he gave them all a once over. “Names?”

“Patrick Stump, that’s Joe Trohman, Andy Hurley and Pete Wentz.”

The man flipped through his papers. “Um, sorry, not seeing your names on here.”

Patrick gulped. “Um, no, they should be there,” he said, stepping up to look at the list. The mand held his massive hand out, blocking Patrick.

“You calling me a liar?” he said angrily.

Pete grabbed Patrick’s arm. “No, he’s not Val Kilmer.” He turned to Patrick. “Did you text her to let her know we’re here?”

“Yeah, she’s not answering,” Patrick replied worriedly.

Pete stepped up to the guard. “Look, I’m sure this is all a mistake. We’re supposed to be on that list. We’re friends of the author.”

“Buddy, I don’t care if you’re the fucking Queen of England, if you ain’t on the list, I’m not letting you through.” He glared at Pete.

“Okay, wow, first of all, if I was the Queen of England, you would because I’m pretty sure you’d piss of an entire nation, second of all, I don’t appreciate the way you’re talking to us,” Pete said, starting to get angry.

“Hey now, guys, what’s wrong?” Marcus stepped out of the SUV and walked over to them.

“Nothing,” Patrick said hurriedly.

“Your boys need to get out of here,” the guard said, puffing up his chest. He knew that Marcus was still larger than he was. “They aren’t on this list.”

Marcus looked at Patrick. “Maybe we should go.”

“No, Harper said we were supposed to come, she said,”

“Hank, what’s going on?” Patrick turned and saw the tall boy named Nicholas, stepping out of the door wearing a tailored suit and tie. He gave them all an arrogant smile and walked down the steps toward them. “Oh, Patrick, I didn’t think you’d actually show up.”

Patrick looked at him warily. He could feel Pete, Joe and Andy come up behind him. “Hi, Nicholas, right? Is Harper in there? This guy isn’t letting us in.”

Nicholas patted Hank’s shoulder. “Don’t worry man, I’ll take care of this,” he said in a low voice. Patrick narrowed his eyes at Nicholas. “Patrick, I’m sorry, I wish she could’ve just told you herself, but Harper changed her mind.”

“What the hell?” Pete blurted out.

That was exactly how Patrick felt at the moment. There was no way Harper changed her mind. She seemed so sure she wanted him there; they texted constantly all day long. “I don’t understand,”

“You know how she is. She thought she could handle seeing you again, but in the end, she just couldn’t do it. So she wanted me to come out here and let you know.” Nicholas put his hands in his pockets. “Sorry, you had to come all the way down here…”

“I don’t believe you,” Patrick said, “I want Harper to tell me herself,”

“Like she told you that you two were breaking up?” Patrick looked at him dumbfounded. “Surprised that I know about the note? Harper is weak, she can’t face her own emotions, you and I both know that.”

“Patrick, we should probably go,” Andy said, placing a hand on his shoulder comfortingly.

Patrick could feel his eyes getting hot and wet. “No, I know Harper wanted me here, I know it.”

Nicholas laughed. “Patrick, she was having a weak moment. She’s a child, she doesn’t know what she wants,”

“You sure seem confident about what Harper wants,” Pete said sarcastically, glaring at him.

Nicholas shrugged. “Harper and I,” he chuckled, “let’s just say, you don’t have to worry about her Patrick. I’ll take very good care of her for you. Face it, you’re not the kind of guy she needs. She needs someone who can take care of her, who won’t betray her. I think it’s best you leave now. If you don’t, I’ll find a way to make sure you never get to see Harper again.” Nicholas crossed his arms and glared at Patrick.

Patrick tried to swallow the lump in his throat but it remained lodged, suffocating him and holding back the tears he knew would come. He wanted to rush by both Nicholas and the guard and into the venue and confront Harper right then. “Patrick, come on,” Andy said, tugging on his sleeve.

Patrick looked back at his band mates. They all looked as equally as let down as he felt. He knew it had to be a lie, but what were they going to do about it? “Fine,” he muttered, turning and walking back toward the SUV with Marcus and the guys.

“I can see why you want her back so badly though,” Nicholas called out, “she looks spectacular in nothing but her bra and panties.”

His taunt made Patrick snap. “Don’t talk about Harper that way, you asshole!” Patrick shouted, turning around and making a move toward Nicholas. Marcus quickly snapped him up.

“Oh no you don’t. Charlie will kill you if you get thrown in jail for punching that smug ass bitch in the face.”

He hauled Patrick into the SUV and had their driver leave as quickly as possible. Patrick opened up his phone.

WHY COULDN'T U JUST COME OUT AND TELL ME? I THOUGHT U WANTED TO TALK TONIGHT.

He waited for her reply, but none came.

HARPER TALK TO ME PLEASE.

HARPER, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS AGAIN?

HARPER, I LOVE U BUT I CAN’T DO THIS ANYMORE.

He angrily threw his phone at the floor. “AAARRRGGHHH!” he growled, grabbing at tufts of his hair.

“Patrick, whoa, calm down,” Pete said, grabbing at his hands.

“NO! Why did she do that to me?! Why did she rub him in my face!? That douche bag!”

“I’m not entirely sure Harper is the one the blame here,” Andy pointed out.

Patrick turned around and glared at him. “She told him to go out there.”

“Did she?” Joe said quizzically. “I mean, Patrick, we all know what we saw this morning. Harper is still in love with you. And the text messages…”

“Well she’s not texting me now,” Patrick said glumly. “Do you think those two really,” he gestured abstractly the notion of sex.

“No, I don’t think Harper would have had sex with him,” Pete said.

“Yeah, Cassidy said he was trying to get in her pants, but Harper doesn’t want to have sex with him,” Joe reminded him.

Patrick sighed. “I just, I can’t keep wondering you know? There’s not time for all this crap.”

“Patrick, don’t give up on her yet,” Pete said.

“Yeah, maybe we just need some reinforcements,” Joe said, pulling out his phone.

“What are you doing?”

Joe smiled at Patrick. “I’m calling the one person who can knock some sense into Harper,” he paused when someone answered the phone on the other end. “My beautiful sugar cup,”

“Don’t call me that dumb ass!” Cassidy shouted through the other end, making Joe wince and the other guys smile.

Joe started detailing their encounter to Cassidy and asked her to come up in the morning to talk to Harper. Cassidy agreed and Patrick felt a little better, but his mind kept focusing on Nicholas’ words

You’re not the kind of guy Harper needs, Nicholas had said.

How does he know? Patrick thought bitterly. He glanced over at Pete, who was sitting next to him, watching him intently. “Is this really worth all of the trouble?” he asked him quietly.

Pete wrapped his arm around Patrick and tilted his head against his. “It is Patrick. Trust me. You and Harper. That’s a love story okay? Don’t let that dumb ass get to you.”

Patrick let Pete hold him until they reached the hotel, hoping that maybe all of this was a bad dream and if he woke up, everything would suddenly be back to normal.