Sweet Like Sugar

I had to get away from Buckley’s as quickly as possible. I don’t think I’ve ever been that scared in my entire life.

When I finally slow down, I’m five blocks away but I’m still twenty minutes away from my house. I’m not really the athletic type. That was probably the most running I’d done in years and my lungs are reminding me of this fact when I can’t catch my breath.

As I child I had really bad asthma but it kind of went away when I got older. I still had my inhaler but I hadn’t used it in years. It only flared up when I was super stressed out or after a sudden increase of heart rate and I was definitely starting to feel a familiar burning sensation.

I find a tree next to the sidewalk and sit down in the shade placing my hands on top of my head. The adrenaline from stealing, the fear form almost getting caught, on top of the running was taking it's toll and I really wished I would have listen to my mom about carrying my inhaler with me wherever I went ‘just in case’, but that was three years ago and how was I supposed to know I’d be doing so much running today?

I start taking diaphragmatic breaths in through my nose and slowly out through my mouth. I had no choice but to relax myself or I could end up having an attack and I clearly didn’t want that to happen on a random sidewalk. I sat there for about ten minutes. Luckily the street was fairly empty and I only got a few odd stares from old ladies who probably assumed I was up to no good with my teenage shenanigans and all.

I was finally starting to feel composed enough to try walking again when I hear my name being called.

My real name.

I look up and see Finn waving and jogging towards me with a small grin and I immediately start wigging out. I don’t know if I should be happy because I really wanted to see him again or worried because my heart rate had yet again started to increase.

He gets to me and he’s breathing somewhat heavy most likely from running a long distance.

“Hey, I knew it was you.” He says through his exhales.

“Hi.” I respond still a little out of it.

“Hi.” He smiles and I look away. God! This was definitely not good for my heart rate. I’d heard somewhere before that cute boys were dangerous but this was ridiculous.

“What are you doing on the ground?”

I realize I look like a complete idiot looking up at him from the ground. Get the hell up, Albie!

“Uh…nothing. I was just catching my breath.” I stand up brushing off my pants and I could have stopped there but being the absolute blabber mouth that I am I keep going.

“I-I uh...you see I have asthma…well I had asthma when I was little but I haven’t had a need for my inhaler in like three years but I just ran like five blocks and I was feeling like my chest was caving in so I had to stop and do some deep breathing exercises I learned from my therapist when I was seven. I’m not in therapy anymore though. I’m not crazy or anything I was just an overly emotional child.”

“Okay?” He furrowed his eyebrows. Overly emotional child? Why was I such a moron. “Are you like..okay?”

“I should be fine. I just needed to calm down before I start walking again.”

“Well...why don’t you just catch a ride with one our coaches?” He points behind him down the street and I can see a few other boys running up the side walk being followed by a guy in a golf cart. “We’re going back to the field. I’m sure he can drop you off at the middle school. Your mom works there, right?”

Something about Finn knowing small facts about me that made me feel like melting. But that could have also just been the scorching heat.

“Uh I don’t want to bother him. He seems really busy.” I wasn’t too keen on asking strangers for help. Especially strangers that were huge 40 year old jocks.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll explain the situation.” He pats my shoulder before turning around and jogging back to his coach and I soften.

Don’t look at his butt. Don’t look at his butt. Don’t you dare do it, Albie!

I just glace at it…and it’s perfect.

God dammit!

He reaches the cart fairly quickly and they exchange a few words and I see the coach look at me and then back to Finn with a nod. Finn then retreats back to me.

I feel so bad for making him run more when he was probably already tired from running with his team.

“You’re good to go. When he comes by just hop on the back.” He smiling and breath thing though his mouth while rubbing his chest.

“You didn’t have to do that...but thanks a lot.”

“No problem, bro.” He playfully hits my shoulder again. I’m his bro? I mean hell yeah I’m his bro. I could totally be a bro. “Be careful. You seem to attract danger a lot. How’s your nose?”

I flare my nostrils. “It doesn’t hurt anymore. The swelling’s finally gone down.”

He nervously laughs and scratches his head. “Sorry about that.”

“Don’t worry.” I wave it off. “I heard you the first five hundred times. Oh yeah. My dad managed to get all of my blood out of your shirt. He’s a genius at those things. I can return it to you by tomorrow.”

“Nah. Keep it. It’s the least I can do.”

A few boys pass by us and one of them hits Finn’s shoulder and tells him to catch up as he passes. The coach is only a small distance away now as well.

“Shit.” Finn laughs at his friend, I assume, and brushes off his shoulder where he was hit. “I have to go…but uh…I have to talk to you about something. Um...is it okay if I call you tonight?”

I’m so caught off guard by his words I struggle to get my answer out.

“Suyeah. I mean s-sure or yeah…or whatever. Of course you can.”

“Suyeah? You’re hilarious. Can I uh...have your number?” He pulls a pen from his ear that I’m almost positive he borrowed from his coach because I had just noticed it. “I don’t have any paper so you can just write it on my hand.”

I was literally going to die! I could my feel heart rate increasing yet again but this time the burning feeling was starting to come back and I really needed my inhaler.

I take the pen from him and my hand is shaking but he holds out his left palm and lets me scribble the seven digits to my house phone.

A few more boys pass and one of them say something about Finn finally being able to get someone’s number and it makes the other two boys in his group laugh.

Finn laughs along with them and I feel like I’m going to pass out. I had never been so grateful of being completely exhausted and flushed from running or it would have been way easy to see how hard I was blushing.

“I wish it was this easy to get a girl’s number.” Finn chuckles as I finish up and I try to join him but it’s strained and forced.

The coach pulls up in the golf car just in time for me not to make more of a fool out of myself in front of him and I retreat to the car.

“Talk to you later, Albie!” Finn yells as we speed away and I watch him wave from the back of the car until he turns into a little dot and disappears in the distance.

The coach who in fact is only acknowledged as ‘Coach’ tries to keep a conversation going with me by asking how I was feeling and telling me to make sure I always kept my inhaler with me. He then starts going into stories about how some of his players had asthma which lead him into asking me what kind of sports I enjoyed.

Was this a normal thing for boys? I had never really had a close guy friend so I wasn't sure. Were sports all they talked about? My dad was the only other guy I really really knew and he wasn't that all into sports. He watched them a bit but I couldn't really say they were a huge part of his life and he'd never once forced me into watching a game with him.

Luckily we reach the middle school before I have time to answer and I quickly hop off giving him a small goodbye wave and fast walk to the double doors at the entrance, afraid I could handle anymore running today.

I’m holding my chest when I walk into my mom’s classroom and all of her students turn to look at me but I can’t be bothered with them.

My mom is sitting at her desk either inputting grades into the system or playing a game of solitaire and her chocolate brown hair is tied up in a bun which meant she was not having a good day.

Theses were just little things you picked up on as a child and this was probably the most important rule when it came to dealing with my mom. Hair down= Nice mom. Hair up= Run away. But I couldn't run away. Running had gotten me into this mess.

“Mom.” I whine. “My inhaler.” I knew she always carried one in her purse. The burning in my lungs are getting worse as I speak and I’m 100% sure it’s because Finn Ferguson just asked me for my number and told me he was going to call me tonight. I was seriously stressing.

What could he possibly have to talk to me about? A love confession maybe?

I was getting ahead of myself. There was no way he was going to confess his love to me. We barely even knew each other. But if not that then what?

I was freaking out!

“Sugar?!” My mom gets up from her desk and starts walking over to me but I wave at her to stop.

“My inhaler, mom.” I try rubbing my chest but it isn't really helping.

She looks confused and then she understands what’s going on. “Oh right, sweetie.” She turns back to her desk and start rampaging through her purse until she pulls out my inhaler and tosses it to me.

I quickly take a few puffs and take a few deep breaths and by this time my mom is rubbing my back and asking a boat load of questions like “What happened? Are you okay? Are you having an attack? Do you need to go the hospital?”

Her class is still focused entirely on me and I brush her off and explain that I’m fine and why I was out of breath.

She then proceeds to chew me out about not carrying my inhaler with me and running such a long distance when I knew I didn't have it.

“Sugar?” She stops and eyes me unusually.

“Ma’am?” I would usually say ‘Huh’ but I was trying to stay on her good side.

“Is there something in your shirt?” She asks pointing to the magazine clearly showing though my shirt.

I freeze. Oh my god, I had completely forgotten about the magazine!

“Nope.” I hurriedly answer making a 180 degree turn and walking out of the classroom.