A Life Better Than Reality Lies in My Dreams

"Hey baby." Zacky said pulling me into his arms and kissing me deeply. I pulled away and smiled, staring into his beautiful eyes. The ocean breeze blowing the stray hairs into my face. He brushed one behind my ear and whispered, "I love you." My smile only widened and I replied, "I love you too." He slowly pulled away from me and turned to walk away. "Where are you going?" I asked with a small laugh. He smiled at me over his shoulder not saying anything. When he got a few feet further I asked him anxiously, "Zacky, where are you going?" He didn't even turn to say anything this time. I tried walking after him but my legs wouldn't move. I just watched as Zacky finally became a spec along the horizon. I woke up from my nightmare, just to be reminded of the real nightmare I had to face today. Tears fell silently as I pulled my knees to my chest and laid there trying to sort the jumbled thoughts in my head. After a moment Rev threw his arm over me. I turned under his arm to face him. He was still asleep with his jaw open slightly. I giggled silently at the sight of him then gently pulled myself out of his grasp without waking him. I got up quietly and made it to the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror and was horrified at the reflection. My hair was tangled up on the left side where I slept, my make-up was smudged, and my eyes were puffy and bloodshot from all the crying. I washed my face with warm water then walked back into the room. I stood looking at Rev outstretched on the bed and decided to face what was waiting for me on the other side of the door.

When I open the door Zacky's head hit the floor with a thud. "Holy shit!" I gasped jumping backwards. Rev sat up, "What? What is it?" "Just me." Zacky said rising up rubbing his head. "What the fuck were you doing?" I hissed at him. He looked up at me and gave a small smile. "I was waiting for you." I rolled my eyes and stepped over him. "April. Please wait." Zacky said jumping up. I made it to the hall when Zacky grabbed my hand, pulling me to a stop. "April, can we please talk about this?" I spun around to face him. "What is there to talk about Zack? You were practically on top of your ex-girlfriend and I happened to walk in. Since I'm not technically your girlfriend, you didn't do anything wrong." I tried to pull out of his grasp but he pulled me to him and crashed his lips to mine. For the tiniest second I couldn't help but kiss back. When I got some sense about me I pulled away from him. He tightened his grip around my waist not letting me walk away. "April, you walked in when Gina kissed ME. She was angry with me because I told her I wanted to be with you, then she grabbed me and kissed me and that's when you walked in. I'm not going to lie, because of the alcohol in my system I didn't pull away as quickly as I should have but the kiss literally lasted for ten seconds." He loosened his grip and let me pull away from him. "Zacky, you are going to have to let me have time to think about this." I said looking at the floor. He lifted my hand to his lips and kissed it softly. "Take all the time in the world. I'll be waiting until you choose to be with me."

Zacky followed me as far as the living room, leaving me alone to walk to the room. When I reached the top of the stairs Eryka walked out of her room. "Hey, how do you feel..." She must have seen my tear streaked face because she immediately rushed to hug me. "What's wrong? What happened?" She asked looking at me frantically. "Let's go in the room." I said quietly. I lay on the bed and told her the entire story of what had happened. She was shaking her head with a lack of words when there was a knock on the door. "Hey it’s Amber. Can I come in?" Amber asked through the door. Eryka opened the door and Amber sat beside me on the bed. "April, are you alright? Matt just told me everything." She said stroking my hair. "I just don't know what to do." I said with a deep sigh. "I think you should trust him April. It sounds like he means everything he said." Eryka said looking at me sheepishly. I stared at her blankly. "Honestly, I think he's being sincere too." Amber said looking out the window. "I don't know. I can't just walk down there and jump into his arms. I need time; I need him to prove to me how much he truly wants to be with me." I paused as tears stung my eyes again. "You know he told me he loved me last night?" I stared at the bed. They both gasped. I laughed nervously. "But he was too drunk to realize what he was saying." Amber turned to me, hesitated, and then asked, "Do you feel the same way about him?" I looked at her and shrugged. "I'm still not sure. I do care about him a lot but I don't think it's...love." A smile slowly spread across her face. "What?" Eryka asked. "Well they do say that people say what they really mean when they are drunk. So he probably is really in love with you." Amber said still smiling at her assumption. There was a light knock on the door. "Who is it?" Amber asked for me.

"Matt." Amber looked at me questioningly. I nodded and she said, "Come in." "Hey. Um." Matt started. "What is it?" Amber asked impatiently. "Zacky wants to know if he can come in and talk to you." Matt said in one fast breath. I had to laugh at the childishness of the messenger. Matt looked at me anxiously and the girls gave me looks of encouragement. I exhaled deeply and said, "Yeah. Alright." Every one left and no sooner did they exit did Zacky walk in, shutting the door behind him. "Hey." I said quietly not moving from my lying position on the bed. "Hey." He replied cautiously crawling in the bed beside me. "Zacky," I started but he cut me off by wrapping me in his arms. I tried to fight the tears as I rested my head against his chest. "I'm sorry." He whispered. I pulled my face away to look at him and he wiped a tear way with his thumb. "Please don't cry. You are making me feel worse than I already do." He said kissing my forehead and leaving his lips there. I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself. "Zacky, I think we are going to have to practically start over. Not entirely but just go a little slower." I said not moving. He pulled away from me and waited until I opened my eyes to look at him. "So we are still together?" He asked hopefully. "We were never officially together, but if you want to be I still think we should hold off on that. Just until my feelings aren't as scattered as they are now." I said looking down. "I understand." He said letting out a sigh. "So what do you want to do today?" He asked with a sideways grin. I smiled, kissed him softly, and then snuggled into his chest. "This." I replied.