Beautiful Disasters

Louis was still there when I woke up in the morning and it unsettled me, he had his arms tight around my waist forcing me to lie against his sadly defined chest. I feel like he would be so much easier to ignore if I wasn’t attracted to him. I tried to pry his arms off of me but they just seemed to tighten more and it was beyond irritating. I heard him chuckle finally; it was raspy and deeply laced with sleep.

He finally let me go and I scurried into my room to get dressed for work, hoping that when I came back he would be gone. I was not that lucky, he was sitting on my bed with a smile plastered on his face. I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t want to sit on the be next to him but it felt awkward to just be standing here.

“Well sweetheart I have a meeting to get to, but I have to warn you not to be on the streets tonight, I want you to be tucked away in your bed like the good girl I know you are.” He said.

I didn’t like that he was dictating what I could and couldn’t do but did I actually have a choice? What would he do if I disobeyed him this time, would it be worse than a slap? I didn’t know and hopefully I wouldn’t have to find out. Louis left and I went about my day like nothing different happened this morning. I can’t believe that I let him hold me while I slept.

Lacey had invited me out tonight and I thought about not going especially with what Louis had said this morning but then I remembered Louis is a pompous asshole so I decided to take a risk and go out with her. I dressed in a nice dark blue skater skirt and a grey jumper since it was still cold outside. I laced up my grey boots over my tight covered legs and called it good after running a brush through my messy hair and tossing it into a simple bun.

I left my flat and headed towards the bar that Lacey told me to meet her at, it was colder than I had expected it to be and I kind of wished I had decided to call a cab but decided to tough it out. I wish I had taken a cab now. I was grabbed roughly from behind and a cloth was roughly pushed against my mouth and nose and the only thought running through my head was not again.

I felt horribly sick, I woke up and felt the urge to puke but I kept it at bay because I couldn’t stand the idea of regurgitating anything. It was pitch black in the room I was in and I had a few faint bruises on my arms and legs that I had no idea where they came from. I was petrified. A door creaked open and a guy strolled in as light invaded the dark room.

“Good to see your awake sleeping beauty, the boss really wanted a pretty one and I told him I would find one and look at you, you are pretty and innocent too. I bet he’ll enjoy taking that innocence from you soon” He said winking at me.

If I hadn’t wanted to puke before I definitely did now. I was being taken, I was being trafficked. This couldn’t be happening to me. I realized the room was actually a van, that explained the bruises on my body I probably rolled around in the van on the way here. I wondered how long I had been asleep. The guy roughly grabbed a hold of my arm and pulled me from the van. The light hurt my eyes so bad that I thought I was going blind. This didn’t feel like last time, this felt worse.

If only I had just listened to my mom and stayed around Texas and went to school maybe things would be drastically different. I mean I would be miserable but at least I wouldn’t be sick and possibly about to get raped by a fat ugly man, I didn’t know what he looked like but honestly that’s what I pictured. It probably seems like I am super calm right now but I am anything but, I don’t want to get raped, I wish I had just stayed in my flat like Louis had suggested.

I was finally pushed into a room and I kept my head down too terrified to even look up at the man who had obviously bought me. I couldn’t believe things like this actually happen, where are the police when you need them? I heard the chuckle, the chuckle I had become so familiar with but I didn’t want to believe it was him. I looked up and there was Louis sitting behind a desk in what I assumed was his study. He had his hands folded under his chin and a Cheshire grin on his face like he had just heard the funniest joke and couldn’t stop smiling.

“I told you not to go out little one and look what happened, here you are in the jaws of a lion, and if you think this was your punishment for not doing as I say, this was only child’s play.” He said like he hadn’t just caused me to almost lose it.

All of a sudden I couldn’t breathe; I couldn’t think it was like everything was caving in at once. I was starting to trust him, I was starting to see him as a person, but as I looked at him all I saw was a monster. How could he do this to me? The grey eyes that I saw nights ago now flashed through my mind and I wondered if I had imagined them in the first place not wanting to believe that it was really Louis? Is my mind playing tricks on me? I couldn’t see straight it was becoming hard to be here at all. The pounding in my head seemed to intensify all at once like a woodpecker was pecking away at my head.

“Faye breathe” I could hear the worry in his voice.

I couldn’t do what he said and I passed out. I finally started breathing again and I woke back up with a start.

“You’ve gone too damn far this time Louis! That poor girl had a panic attack because you fucked with her brain. I know you are a twisted asshole but really? Do you even have feelings for her?” I heard a girl yelling.

“You better get your girl under control Zayn before I do something I will regret” Louis said, he sounded tired and stressed.

I couldn’t stop the moan that floated from my lips, it was loud because my throat was so raw from all the sobs that seemed to now be racking my body as everything was finally sinking in. The door was pushed open and Louis slowly strolled in carefully watching me and I couldn’t even look at him. I turned my head too scared to do anything else, if he was capable of something like this, what lengths wouldn’t he go to? I was so angry at Louis, I couldn’t even look at him, I felt the bed dip and I smelt his cologne and then his arms were wrapped around me which only caused me to sob harder.

“Calm down princess, it’s all alright. You need to learn to listen to me. I told you not to leave your house and that’s exactly what you did, I had to prove my point to you. Something like this could actually happen to you, you’re so innocent and wholesome. People want your light, people like me need that light to see where we are going, I’m pure darkness so I can’t help but be drawn to someone like you. Do you understand?”

I couldn’t answer him, I didn’t know how. I was exhausted and I felt horrible I couldn’t help but relax into him. My body was sore from the Van and from being immobile thanks to the chloroform. I didn’t understand Louis, I don’t know anything about him other than that he has control issues and when things don’t go his was he tends to be dramatic. I closed my eyes finally too exhausted to stay awake, too numb to care that I was in the arms of a monster with beautiful features.

I woke up feeling better but I finally couldn’t stop it, I pushed out of Louis arms and found the bathroom and unloaded the nothing that was in my stomach. Throwing up itself is bad, but dry heaving is worse especially when your throat already feels raw. I felt hands rubbing my back my hair being pulled out of my face. I was grateful but I couldn’t help the automatic flinch. I couldn’t trust him; I didn’t know why he felt like this was necessary, I was already scared of him but now I was terrified.

“Come on let me get you some water.”

He scooped me up into his arms like I was nothing. I felt so small in his arms, he wasn’t super buff or anything but compared to me he was large and he was tall. I sat right around 5’1 so he was definitely a head or two taller than me.

“You won’t catch me doing this often, but I am sorry. Sometimes I just get carried away.” He started sitting me down and handing me a glass of water that I hesitantly took. “I want you to listen to me, and the only way I know how to make that happen is by installing fear into you, that’s what I was taught. I don’t have loving and caring parents, my mother was a kind and beautiful woman who was way too amazing for my good for nothing father. I was raised to be the way I am, I grew up in this business it is all I know. I don’t know how to be gentle and I rarely apologize but when you couldn’t seem to get breath into your lungs earlier I freaked out. I don’t want to have that effect on you. I however need you to understand that I need you to listen when I talk to you. You may not want to be my girl, but that is the hand you were cruelly dealt.” He then bent his head towards mine and captured my lips.

This kiss was rough and demanding, like he was claiming me as his and in that moment I realized I would probably never lose his interest because it was truly extraordinary to keep it for the amount of time I already had.