Heart's Desire

I could not breath, led alone speak. The words fail. But my eyes did all the talking. Carter is the son of Sandra Jenkins? His surname is Grey? Was his father a Grey? Or his mother?

On what happen to me friday morning around 10:52 I could not understand the possibility that my English professor were also the one who fingered me and now sitting across from me with his parents, and I with mine? Am I dreaming? This feels like a dream. Or is a reality. The reality of me being in my own worse movie. The secret life of american slut.

"Jessica don't you agree?" My mother says turning to me.

"What?" I zoned out, I was not even aware that I was looking at Carter dumb struck for the past five minutes...

"That Carter is an amazing professor."

Amazing with his hands yes, with his words..no.

"Yes, he is."

My phone yet again saved me from the embarrassment I was getting into. Talking about my professor who I so desperately want to touch... Again.

"If you will excuse." I pardon myself from the table. Walking out I sense all eyes were on me, like I was an unknown disease, and they the microscope, desperately wanting to find out what I am, or and if I was contagious.

The large heavy metallic door slings open as the fresh breeze on the sunday afternoon caught my hair making it wave down my shoulders like a affect waiting for its cause.

The alley was deserted only plastic bands going into the direction the wind changed them. The way Carter chased me out that Friday morning.

"Hello?"

"Hi! Oh my god best spring break ever." For you maybe, but for me? It felt I was drowning and I had no life raft to pull me back up.

"That's great Mandy. How is Brett?"

A heavy sigh blast through the little speaker, knowing that sigh its going- "wonderful, we spend all day wind bun-gee jumping." like my heart fell out of my ass when he walked in the restaurant.

"You know, I wish I could of been there." It is. I rather be in New-York than standing in the back of an alley hiding from my professor.

"You would of loved it Jesse."

"When are you coming back home?" Defining home: a place where family is.

Since freshmen year Mandy was my family. My new family.

"Tuesday, depends on the weather and if I can get a flight out. Its literally Noah's ark here in NYU and I am eating Pie."

A soft giggle escapes my lips as Mandy says her fully excursion sentence. "Well be safe, and call me when you got a flight okay?"

"Okay. Bye." I hang up with a sigh pushing my white with pink butterflies phone in my blazer.

I turn my head slightly seeing the metallic door open. Carter.

"Don't you think," he begins to stroll over towards me. I retreat as fast as I could hitting the cement wall with my back. "This is faith?"

Faith? "I believe it is just pure coincidence."

His mouth, his beautiful mouth quirk up to a amusing smile. Like he is telling him self a private joke in that head of his.

Carter's choice of words, clothing and personality always caught me off guard. Even though I known him for almost three years and he knows me three days, maybe four if you include him bumping into me at the library on freshman orientation. That was indeed the moment I fell, fell deeply and utterly in love with him.

My body shivers increases as his thumb caressed my rosy cheek. I slowly yanked away moving my head to the left. "I won't bite."

"That's what I am afraid off." I breathe.

He looks down at my slightly worn out combat boots, giving a chuckle. "You look nice in skirts, or dresses." A compliment I am assuming, or just a friendly meaning of 'you look like crap in jeans'. "You caught me off guard when I saw you sitting at the table."

My throat clogged up as I gasp for air. "Right back at you. I had no idea your mother was Sandra."

"And I had no idea my family knew yours, if I knew I would of climbed on you a long time ago."

The wetness between my legs made crumble inside. My stomach yet again doing cheerleading moves making me want to vomit. Controlling shivering send me through oblivion has his lips touched mine. Soft sweet, smooth. Like my first kiss...

"I like this smell on you, you smell like roses and sex."

"Could you stop torturing me." I whisper.

"I am not torturing you, I am just savoring the moment." The moment was dead set, he wanted me.. In the worst place possible. In a alley.

Carter pushed his lower body towards mine, his erection growing as he slides up and down making me want to call out his name; but I refused.

His teeth sunk into my bottom lip tugging to and fro, still that send me over the edge as I grab his gorgeous set of hair wanting more.

I was never been considered a slut. But what I am doing now.. Does it make me one?

"Mm, love when you take control, we should explore that." He purrs moving his head towards my neck, releasing soft kisses up to my ear down my collar bone.

His hand took mine leading me towards his stiff erection. "He as well need attention."

My eyes were closed. I had no control over my actions nor my self capability to say 'no!' My inner goddess was in control and I gracefully accepted it as she took the steering wheel.

My hand moved up against his length stroking it up and down through his pants, I am good with area's and volume's but to be accurate Cater's length was 9 inches. From my experience with men... Correcting myself man. I never knew it could grow that larger..

He suddenly step back wards pushing his hair out of his face leaving me once again breathless. "We should go."

He turned on his heel pulling the door open. "Come." I almost did.

I nod slowly slapping myself mentally to get a grip. I was back in control and my goddess was pounding with rage inside me. She wanted to play.

But yet again like before. He stopped it.